Sandpaper

Wearing One Million Baby

Rod Stewart femulating for the “If We Fall in Love Tonight” music video.

Click here to view this video on YouTube.

Go Vote!

This year was the first time that early in-person voting was an option in Connecticut, so I decided to try it out. My guess was that in our town with a population of 16,000 that there would  not be many people early voting and that I would be in and out of the town hall quickly. 

Wrong!

The parking lot was full, but I lucked out as another car was just leaving when I showed up. There was a very short line at the check-in desk, but after checking-in, I found a longer line of  winding  through the hallway to the voting room. So it took about 30 minutes to get in and out of the town hall.

A word about checking in… I did not recognize the woman staffing the check-in desk. I handed her my driver’s license and when she examined it, she looked up and said, “Stanley! How are you?” She was a family acquaintance who I had not seen in years. She asked about my family and then she sent me on my  way to end of the long line.

She never said anything about how I was dressed. I was wearing skinny jeans, a long sleeve tee, sneakers and minimal jewelry and minimal makeup (how unlike me!) so that I matched the boy photo on my driver’s license. I guess I was so androgynous that my old friend did not notice or she was so nice that she did not want to say anything to embarrass me.

Go figure!

And go vote!

By the way, I voted for Harris and Walz and I hope you will, too.

Wearing Alice + Olivia

Alexandre Wetter femulaing in the 2020 French film Miss.

Stuff: The Cruel Mirror

By J.J. Atwell 

Finding the Right Outfit

Looking at yourself in the mirror can be a cruel experience. While I was idly browsing the Internet, I came across an article that I thought was a very good take on the issue of finding the right outfit. 

The story is aimed at generic girls, but as CDs, we face the same challenges that they face when picking out an outfit. The big question: is it right for your body? As I think about it, our challenges as CDs might be more difficult. But then again, we can make some changes to our apparent body whereas GGs mostly have to deal with what they have. 

I’ve Got Nothing to Wear!

I’m sure we have heard these words from our significant others. I’m also sure that we have repeated those words to ourselves when contemplating our next outing. I have a closet and a half full of clothes for my femme side. Sometimes I’m embarrassed by how much I have. My GG friend, Alicia, commented after one of my recent thrifting excursions that I have more outfits than she normally wears in weeks of day-to-day real life. And JJ only gets out once or twice a month! 

But I still have nothing to wear. Our group sometimes has themed evenings which might call for a special type of outfit. Perhaps a beach theme? How about a holiday theme? I just don’t have things that work for those occasions. Yes, JJ needs to shop for more outfits! 

I have a lot of everyday outfits like skinny jeans, skirts and tops. Just normal stuff that you see women wearing out all the time. But for meetings, JJ prefers to only wear them once. Once an outfit has been seen by the group it gets consigned to the back of the closet, perhaps to only be worn again at home. Some things can get re-used though. I’ve got a couple of skirts that go well with many different tops. The mix and match strategy can expand your wardrobe.

Does this Match?

I haven’t quite mastered the art of knowing what matches. My sense of color and style seems to abandon me when faced with a flowery top. I might be tempted to pair it with a striped skirt if left to my own devices. Fortunately, I have an SO and some GG friends that I can bounce ideas off of. It is so helpful to get expert advice from a gal pal. 

The Happy Mirror

Now that we have taken all that into account, is that mirror still cruel? In my case, I think I’ve moved on to a happy mirror. When I see myself dressed in the right outfit, I also see a smile on my face. Yes, when you look good you feel good.

I love the suggestion in the article referenced above that we should take inventory of our clothes and pick out the ones that most make us feel good. At that point, it’s time to thin out the closet by getting rid of the other stuff. Yes, it is hard to toss things that we spent time and effort and money acquiring in the first place. But sometimes you have to be cruel so that the mirror is happy. 

I’ll Be Back

I hope you find the referenced article to be interesting. I’ll be back with more Stuff in the next installment. Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff, so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Elàgia

A womanless beauty!

Watch the birdie!

Wearing Bebe

Cliff Norton femulating in a 1964 episode of television’s The Munsters.

Who Knew?

Wearing Paige

Professional femulator Maguette appearing at Eldorado in Berlin, circa 1930.

Norman or Woman

 

Wearing Miss Patina

Milton Berle (center) femulating on a 1959 episode of television’s
The Lucy Desi Comedy Hour.
Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.

The bloom is off the rose

Happy Halloween! 

I counted how many times I crossdressed for Halloween since my first outing in 1969 and I crossdressed about half those past 55 Halloweens... for parties, work or to just get out en femme for the holiday. 

I no longer work, so that is not an option and I have not been invited to any parties. That leaves going out en femme to shop, dine, bank, etc... things that ladies do when they are out and about. 

But for me, the bloom is off the rose called “Halloween.” I’ve done it all on the 31st of October and prefer to go out en femme when there is no safety net. 

Civilians are not surprised to see a man in a dress on Halloween, but if they see that same man in a dress any other day, they might not be so sure about who they are seeing. And when I am out, I’d rather have civilians be unsure of who I am rather than clock me as a man in a dress (or a Playboy bunny costume).

And so it goes.

Wearing Bebe

Dave Foley in costume for the Halloween episode of Newsradio,
which you can view on YouTube by clicking here.

Run Hubby Run

Wearing Ann Taylor

Kamil Bijos femulates Mariah Carey on Polish television’s
Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo (Your Face Sounds Familiar)

Shopping: The Rest of the Story

On Monday, JJ discussed clothes shopping. She admits never shopping en femme, so I thought that I would discuss that shopping option today because there is nothing like it!

I have shopped en homme only when I had to… like during lunch hours from my boy mode job. I have even tried on womenswear while en homme. Sans shapewear (no, I don’t wear a girdle in boy mode), the fit is not exact, but at least it’s in the ballpark and I’ll know whether to return the item to the rack or take it home for my wardrobe.

I have never had a bad experience trying on womenswear en homme. At worst, the salesperson might be surprised, but I have never been shut out of the dressing room. And shopping for womenswear en homme, it has never been an issue, but I am getting off-topic.

Shopping en femme is so much better than shopping en homme or online. It is the most fun I have ever had without laughing! 

If an item doesn’t fit, you put it back on the rack and try on another size. If an item doesn’t look good on you, you put it back on the rack and try on something else. You don’t have to deal with the time and expense of returning an item.

Shopping en femme also is an affirmation of your femininity. Shopping among other women, you blend in and become another woman. Typically, the other women are concentrating on shopping and not on you. They may be aware of your physical presence, but will assume that you are just another girl hunting for a bargain.

While browsing through the racks, I always encounter other women doing the same. They may look up momentarily to see who the other bargain hunter is and when they don’t recognize me, they return to the hunt. Sometimes they may offer a friendly smile or a pleasant “hello,” too. Rarely am I the target of daggers aimed at a man in a dress.

Sometimes I may pass and sometimes I may not. How do I know for sure? But I try to dress properly when I shop – usually it’s “office girl” mode, although office girl mode isn’t what it used to be, so I’d say that it’s more like “legal secretary” mode. 

Although I have also shopped more casually (a top and some kind of bifurcated garment), I prefer legal secretary mode. My point is I don’t wear an evening gown, cocktail dress or hooker garb when I shop; such outfits would give me away.

And for what it‘s worth, I have long ago abandoned my attempt at a femme voice. My normal male voice usually works because I have a natural femme vocabulary and mannerisms.

If you use a credit card, get one that only uses the initial of your first name along with your complete last name in order to conceal your cisgender identity. I have been using my S. credit card like forever, but sometimes when checking out they will ask for a photo ID, your driver’s license for example, and that will blow your cover, but not necessarily. A few times after presenting my driver’s license, the salesperson asked, “Is this your husband’s driver’s license?”

The biggest advantage to shopping en femme is that you are wearing your shapewear when you try on clothing. Shapeworn, you will know exactly what fits without dragging (pun intended) your finds home and then bringing them back to the store for a return.

Don’t let dressing rooms deter you! But always ask a salesperson where the dressing room is located even if you already know where it is. That can save the day if someone complains about the man in the ladies’ dressing room… your alibi is the salesperson who directed you to the ladies’ dressing room.

The dressing room cubicles are usually cramped. There probably is a mirror or two to check yourself out, but it is not the best situation to see how you look. So after slipping on a new item, I usually exit the dressing room and check myself out in the full-length multi-angle mirrors that populate the store’s sales floor. Much better than the mirrors in the cramped cubicle and even better, other shoppers passing by may comment on how you look. (Yeah, guys would never do that, but ladies do and it’s happened to me on many occasions.)

Some stores will assign you to your own cubicle. “Big deal,” you say! Well while you are trying something on and it doesn’t fit, instead of removing the ill-fitting garment, putting your clothes back and exiting the cubicle to fetch a different size, just stick your head out the cubical and ask a salesperson to fetch a different size for you to try! It’s like heaven on earth – and I remember a guy friend asking me why would anyone want to be a woman! It’s so much nicer to be a woman!

The following shopping experience was typical. I spent about an hour in the Misses department of the local JCPenney perusing the racks and going back and forth to the dressing room to try on my finds. During that hour, I encountered a lot of customers doing the same and I noticed none of the other bargain hunters paying any attention to me.

However, I did not go unnoticed. A few people who were not busy shopping noticed me. A woman, who had finished shopping and waiting to pay for her finds, checked me out while she was in line at the cashier. I also noticed two saleswomen checking me out.

Perhaps they were just checking me out because they were impressed with the way I looked. Or maybe they suspected I was en femme and were trying to confirm their suspicions.

Whatever... although some salespeople noticed me, I have never had a salesperson give me a hard time. Their job is to make a sale, so if the customer looks like a duck, then treat the customer like a duck and everything will be ducky.

As I was looking through the racks, a middle-aged woman  approached me and asked, “Can I ask you a question?”

I had no idea what she was going to ask (“What time is it?” “Where did you buy your shoes?” “Are you a tranny?”). I girded my loins, smiled and agreed to answer her question.

“You're dressed fashionably, so I’d like your opinion about a pair of slacks I was thinking about buying.”

Wow! I certainly did not see that coming!

We discussed the merits of the slacks. I did not like what she had picked out and suggested something with a bolder pattern. She admitted that she really did not like what she had picked out and liked my suggestion better.

I pointed out a skirt with a pattern similar to what I had in mind. Her eyes lit up as she said, “I saw slacks with that pattern. Now I just have to find them again! Thank-you for your help.”

“Good luck,” I said.

I then took a deep breath, smiled and thought what a confidence-builder that was!

Wearing Allsaints

Bogdan Kibalyuk femulating in the Russian television series Policeman from YouTube (Politseyskiy s YouTyuba).

Stuff: Shopping for Her

By J.J. Atwell

Whoever heard of a naked CD? What fun would that be? As CDs, we need appropriate clothing for our femme self. Where to get that clothing can be an event that is fraught with hazards. We need a place to shop. We can choose to do that online or we can do it in person at a woman’s clothing store. 

Online Shopping

Doing your femme shopping online is pretty easy. You browse through page after page of beautiful outfits until you spot something that fits your needs. A few further clicks and you’ve completed the order. Then comes the hard part – waiting. 

Of course, there are risks in online shopping. Especially if you are deep in the closet and don’t want your family to know. How will the goods get delivered? If they come to your house, can you grab the package quickly? Or should you have it delivered elsewhere? 

Remember also that once you buy something online the merchant has captured your information. They now know your name, address, email address, credit card information and exactly what you bought. They will most likely use that to try to sell you more stuff. Will it be a problem if mail addressed to you from a woman’s clothing store starts showing up at your house? Did you give them your male or female name for the order and is that an issue for you? 

But perhaps the biggest issue with buying a piece of women’s clothing online is you don’t know if it will work for you. There are many pitfalls to be aware of. The item might look great in the picture online, but will the real item match that? Is the model in the picture representative of what you will look like when dressed? Is the product of good quality and craftsmanship? 

What about getting the right size? In some of my previous installments of Stuff, I talked about sizes and how they can vary considerably from one maker to another. Pay close attention to any size charts for that item and how your measurements mesh with what they think you should be. When one of my GG friends, Alicia, isn’t sure what size to order, she gets two in different sizes and then returns the one that doesn’t fit right. Of course, the final test is how does it look on you. 

Once last tip about online shopping, be sure you know the return policy. 

In-Person Shopping

Going shopping at a woman’s clothing store is harder for most of us. The major dilemma is do we go as a guy or as a girl self. For some, that depends on how well we “pass” and how confident we are in our femme persona. I admit that I haven’t yet gone clothes shopping while dressed as JJ. I feel I need to work on my presentation and confidence a bit more before I take that step. But that doesn’t stop me from shopping in the ladies department as my guy self. 

Remember, just because you are a guy doesn’t mean you can’t buy women’s clothing. The stores do not have rules that require a gender check before they will sell you women’s clothing. Don’t bother making up a story to explain why you are doing it either. The sales agents aren’t going to believe it as they have heard it all before. 

If you need help, simply explain what you are looking for. You don’t have to say it is for you. Just say you need a top that matches the skirt you just picked up. You’ll find that cultivating a relationship with a sales associate will make future visits easier as well. 

If you are shopping en femme, then be sure to try things on in the store. It’s much simpler to check the fit right there. If the size is wrong, you can just grab a size that fits better. If it doesn't look great on you, then just leave it rather than having to go through the whole routine to return an online purchase. 

How Does It Look?

So you’ve braved the women’s shopping world and have secured that prized item. Now comes the really hard part. Trying it on and objectively judging if it is right for you. That means you need to put on the appropriate shapewear. A top won’t look right without boobs. Skirts or pants won’t look right without hips or a feminine butt. Get everything on and look in a full-length mirror. Look hard. Take photos. Did it turn out as good as you hoped? If so, yay! Find a place for it in your closet. If not, return it. Life is too short for bad clothes. 

I’ll Be Back

There will be more Stuff. As always comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so if there is something you would like to read about please let me know! 

Wearing Lafayette 148

Shopping out and about, Lynn Jones of Yet Another Transgender Blog fame. 

You Have Options

Wearing Cynthia Rowley

Tami out and about shopping for FemmeFever.