Happy Holidays!

Someday Funnies: Been There, Done That

Wearing New York & Company

Marie femulating as Princess Poinsettia as part of a porch Christmas display.

Andee attending local support group holiday party.

I Don’t Blend and I Don’t Care

Many wise transwomen recommend blending if you are trying to pass. (I’ve occasionally recommended that myself.)

The theory says that if you dress like the other women in the environment you plan to be in, that is, if you blend in with the other women, you will lessen the chances of bringing attention to yourself, thus increasing the chances of successfully passing yourself off as a woman.

For example, if you are going grocery shopping, then jeans and a top would be your choice of apparel for blending in most places as opposed to a bodycon dress and stiletto pumps.

I have tried blending and it seems to work, but blending is boring. When I dress en femme, I want to dress EN FEMME, if you know what I mean. I dress to be noticed not to be ignored. If I wanted to be ignored, I'd dress en homme.

As Lucille Sorella wrote in her Femme Secrets blog, “As a genetic woman, the last thing I want to do is blend in! I wear makeup, style my hair, and dress fashionably because I want to stand out in a crowd. I believe it’s a natural feminine desire to want to be noticed.”

As a transwoman, I feel the same way. 

I am also at an age that I dress to please me and don’t care what other people think.

And perchance I have to go to Stop & Shop to buy a few items while I am en femme, I just think of myself as another working girl dressed appropriately for the office, but overdressed for grocery shopping during her lunch hour or on her way home from the office.

Works for me.

Wearing Rue La La

Christina at a Tau Upsilon Tri Ess Meeting, Christmas 2008.

Marcie at an entrance to the Galleria in North Dallas, Texas.

70 Years Ago

Seventy years ago on December 1, Christine Jorgensen’s sex change made headlines on the front page of the Daily News and probably kicked off the modern transgender era, although the term “transgender” did not exist back then.

I was just a toddler at the time, but fast forwarding 20 years found me in the audience of University of Connecticut’s Jorgensen Auditorium hanging on to every word spoken by Christine Jorgensen, who was presenting a lecture at my school.

I was taking Journalism 101 and our professor randomly assigned stories to us budding reporters and I just happened to get the Christine Jorgensen assignment. As a closeted crossdressing 21-year-old, I was thrilled, but had to feign disinterest so as not to give anything away!

I attended the lecture and was in awe of the woman, who used to be a man. I had seen photos, but had never encountered a trans-person in person, at least, not to my knowledge. Seeing Christine up on the stage giving her talk was my first trans-encounter and it was a very positive experience. There was no doubt in my mind that Christine was really a woman and it gave me pause that maybe I was one, too.

Thank you Mikki for reminding me about this anniversary.

Wearing New York & Company

Virginia (from France) standing next to the Christmas tree she had just decorated.

Brandy relaxing and contemplating what might Santa bring.

Girls’ Night Out

Girls’ days and nights out during the holidays almost always results in a nice story, so continuing in that vein, I recount another outing with some girlfriends during the holidays.

The agenda for Wednesday's girls’ night out was to go to Hartford to dine at Max Downtown and after dinner, go to TheaterWorks to see Christmas on the Rocks, “an off beat collection of twisted holiday tales.”

I don't know my way around downtown Hartford especially in the dark, so I bribed Diana to do the driving because she worked in Hartford and knows her way around town! So after I got dressed to the nines, I drove to Diana’s abode and she drove us to Hartford.

I-84 in Hartford was threatening to become a parking lot and although we left Diana's house with plenty of time to spare, making our 5:30 reservation at the restaurant looked impossible. Hopefully, the other girls would save the day and get to the restaurant on time.

After abandoning I-84 and working her way through the streets of Hartford, Diana parked in the City Place underground garage, which was under the restaurant (more or less) and we arrived at the restaurant about ten minutes late. Luckily, the other girls (Laura, Robin and Arlene) did arrive on time, so our reservations were intact.

Let me tell you about the restaurant.

Robin suggested it and I went along ― it was new to me and I am always willing to try something new. I checked the menu online and its prices were on the high side, but it’s the holidays, so what the heck!

This place was very classy. Probably one of the classiest restaurants I have ever been in. The male diners all wore suits or sports jackets and the female diners were equally well-dressed. No jeans or tees in this joint!

After checking in, they asked to take our coats and I was pleased to give mine up so I could better show off my outfit while we were escorted to our table. It was a long walk during which I strutted my stuff and took note of some of the attention I was getting. I loved it!

It wasn’t long ago that when this girl was in a similar situation, she would avoid eye contact with any civilians and try to hide in plain sight. Now she relishes the attention, tries to make eye contact and responds with a pretty smile. That’s progress!

The restaurant was packed and we were seated next to tables full of business people, who seemed to mind their own business and not ours, which is no surprise because a table full of middle-aged women just blends into the background in settings like these. 

The very attentive waitstaff used the correct pronouns, called us “ladies” and made our visit as enjoyable as possible. The wine and food (“Max’s Label Dry Aged Prime Beef Burger,” a $21 cheeseburger) was excellent, but the after-dinner coffee seemed a little stale.

Showtime was quickly approaching, so we paid the bill and prepared to exit. I knew that as soon as I hit the cold air outdoors, I would have to relieve myself, so while the others headed for the exit, I headed for ladies’room and used the facilities as they were intended to be used, that is, I sat to pee.

Exiting the ladies’ room, I was unsure about which way to go to get to the exit. One of the staff, an older gent (probably my age), sensed my predicament and asked me where I wanted to go. He then escorted me all the way to the exit, while engaging me in conversation about my experience at the restaurant. It was such a feminine moment – a lady in distress rescued by a knight in shining armor!

Next stop was the theater – a short two-block walk from the restaurant. The theater was small and the seats were narrow. I was very uncomfortable the whole time and it took away from my enjoyment of the show.

The theater describes the play, thusly, “It's Christmas Eve in a rundown local bar. Expecting a silent night, the bartender finds himself mixing drinks for a parade of surprising guests – children from your favorite Christmas specials and movies - now all grown up! Tiny Tim, Charlie Brown, Cindy Lou Who and a host of others pour out their Christmas woes in this delightful parody.”

The Cindy Lou Who (of Grinch fame) and Charlie Brown segments were excellent; the others were OK. They saved the best for last (Cindy and Charlie), so I was less anxious to get out of Dodge because those segments held my interest, but I was still very happy to get up from my uncomfortable seat and file out when the show ended.

Outside the theater, we exchanged hugs and season’s greeting because Arlene-Laura-Robin were parked in a different location than we were parked. Diana and I walked back to City Place under which Diana’s car was parked and after a couple of false starts trying to get into the now locked-up building, we finally were let in, paid for the parking and left Hartford.

Back home, I turned back into a pumpkin at 10:30 PM with memories of an excellent girls’ night out. We discussed doing it again real soon now and I hope we do. 

Wearing Taylor

Lynn Jones attending the Chameleons Christmas Do in 2021.
Lynn blogs at Yet Another Transgender Blog.

Jessica at a holiday party.

Someday Funnies: Add It to His To-Do List

Wearing Alice + Olivia

Angela wishing you a Merry Christmas

Dani posing by her Christmas tree.

Yet Another Girl’s Day Out

On Friday, I posted the story about attending my former employer’s Christmas luncheon en femme after I had retired. They invited me back again the following year, so as a follow-up to Friday’s post, I am telling the rest of the story today.   

Thursday (December 20, 2018), I attended my former employer’s Christmas luncheon party.

I wore my Julia Jordan gunmetal fit-and-flare dress, Dress Barn off-black pin-dot tights and Nine West metallic platform pumps. Instead of accessorizing with silver jewelry as I originally planned, my wife suggested I wear something colorful for the holidays, so I wore a red necklace and red earrings.

As I began to fill my old tired-looking black handbag, my daughter gave me an early Christmas present: a red Kate Spade handbag! I was so surprised and happy with her generous gift that I almost started to cry, but I held back my tears so as not to ruin my makeup.

I left the house and drove to the banquet hall hosting the luncheon. Usually I wear my heels when I drive, but the platform pumps are about a half-inch higher than my usual footwear and that half-inch or so made it difficult to manipulate the three pedals under the dashboard, so I wore flats to drive and switched to heels when I arrived at the banquet hall.

I entered the hall and when I checked my coat, the three women staffing the front of the hall said they loved my outfit. One said she wanted to buy shoes like mine.

I found a seat at a table with my former co-workers and it was just like last year’s Christmas luncheon when I wrote, “It was as if I showed up in boy mode.” Folks greeted and chatted with me like old times. The fact that I was presenting as a woman made no difference.

I realize now that it did not matter if I showed up in boy mode or girl mode. Rather, it mattered that I showed up in Stan mode. In a dress or slacks, I am the same person that my former co-workers knew for 20 years and I think most of them were glad to know me just as I was glad to know them.

👠👠👠

All my previous femulations among my co-workers was with blonde hairdos, so when I showed up as a brunette on Thursday, some people did not recognize me.

While standing in line for the buffet, the co-worker in front of me remarked that she had no idea who I was because I looked so different as a brunette. She added that I looked gorgeous as a brunette.

👠👠👠

Although I had a great time celebrating the holidays with my former co-workers, it was also a little depressing to hear the news I missed during the past year. One co-worker’s son committed suicide, another co-worker was diagnosed with colon cancer and the company is being sold (again), which may result in my division disappearing.

👠👠👠

Good news is that I reached my weight loss goal this week. Bad news is that I now have a closet full of shoes that no longer fit. I had no idea that losing weight would result in reducing my shoe size as well as my dress size.

I plan to go through my collection and see what fits and what doesn't fit. Every cloud has a silver lining, so I assume I will also find shoes that were too small six months ago that now fit.

I discovered my shrinking foot problem when I tried on the Nine West metallic platform pumps a few days before wearing them out. They were very loose and after a few steps, I would lose one shoe or the other.

Being a stubborn fashionista, I was determined to wear those shoes with my new dress to the Christmas party, so I inserted heel liners in each shoe. The liners helped and I did not lose a shoe throughout the day, but often I had to clench my foot when it felt like a shoe was not going my way. So they are destined for the “do not fit” division of my shoe wardrobe.

By the way, I have not been invited back again to my former employer’s Christmas luncheons. It is probably due to my losing touch with my former co-workers, as well as management changes after the company was sold.

Wearing New York & Company

Cyrsti (left) at Christmas dinner with her wife Liz.
Cyrsti blogs at Cyrsti’s Condo.

Paula Gaikowski toasts to Happy New Year.

Someday Funnies: Feckless Father

Wearing Veronica Beard

Allison James sending Holiday Greetings to all!

Joey at a dermatologist appointment. Joey blogs at Joeypress.