Out!

Wednesday, I went out en femme for the first time since the pandemic disrupted our lives.

My health issues have improved so much that I did not think twice about going out. The only thing I conceded to my achy left leg was to wear kitten heels instead of my usual high heels. (Walking after getting up from the seated position is shaky no matter what I wear on my feet, but once I take a few steps, I am good to go. High heels worsen the problem, while the kitten heels do not.)

I finally wore my Boston Proper vegan leather dress out for the first time. I purchased the dress in the fall of 2019, but it was too small. I could not return or exchange it because it was a “final sale” that I was unaware of until I tried to make the return/exchange. 

I was stuck with the dress. I thought that maybe if I lost some weight, it would fit, but I did not expect that to happen real soon now. But guess what? During the past two months, I lost ten pounds fretting over my osteoarthritis and now the dress fits perfectly. (That’s a total of 35 pounds lost since 2019 for those of you who are keeping track.)

I accessorized with silver jewelry and a black bag. I was ready to exit to my Subaru in the garage when my wife appeared to check me out. She hated my black bag and insisted that I add some color to my outfit. After trying different accessories, we settled on a red bag and a red floral scarf that you see in the accompanying photo. 

My wife was so helpful – it was as if she was helping out a girlfriend rather than a girly husband! She is a treasure!

The 20-minute drive to the Victoria House Restaurant and Tavern in Cheshire was uneventful and I soon found myself seated in the dining room with four lady friends who I have known like forever: Lisa, Sylvia, Diana and blurred Lee Anne, who had to attend in boy mode because he had a boy mode engagement following out luncheon. (I listed the ladies‘s names, left to right, as they are seated in the photo below.)

Food was secondary to the conversations as we were all getting caught up on what we were doing during the pandemic. By the way, we practically had the dining room to ourselves; there were only two women seated at another table, so some of the trans topics we discussed did not cause a commotion.

I did manage to bring attention to myself exiting the restaurant. To leave the restaurant, I had to go through the tavern, where there were about a dozen civilian patrons. One door in the tavern led to the actual exit and the other door led to the rooftop patio. Of course, I chose the wrong door and the waitress shouted to inform me that I was going the wrong way. Meanwhile, all the patrons looked up to see who was the lost soul! (I was not embarrassed – rather I was happy to show off my female presentation to the civilians.)

I drove home exhilarated to be back in my heels again and looking forward to the next opportunity to go out en femme. I was also happy that I was healthy enough to do so.

Update: Transgender Lives Conference

This just in: I will be presenting at the Transgender Lives Conference at 10 AM EDT on Saturday, April 30. My topic is “Confidence: A Crossdresser’s Best Friend.”

Wearing New York & Company

Young femulators performing in UK The Beacon School’s production of Bugsy Malone. (Thank you, Zoe, for the heads-up about this femulation.)

Someday Funnies

Wearing Boston Proper

Professional femulator Minouche, circa 1955

Mainstream Feminization

Yesterday morning, while I was washing the breakfast dishes, my spouse was watching Drew Barrymore’s daytime television show. My spouse was interested in the cake that Drew and guests were decorating, while I was interested in the male guest who was wearing a flowing purple halter-top dress (above left). 

The male guest was Jonathan Van Ness, who is well-known for his feminine wardrobe. I have seen Jonathan in the past, typically on some cable channel late at night, so I was surprised to see him on a major network’s (ABC) daytime television show.

In the afternoon, while I was doing the laundry, “All Access” was playing on our television and the topic of conversation was the growing popularity of men’s lingerie. They were talking about all sorts of lingerie for men, including bras! They even showed a photo of the host Mario Lopez, in lingerie for an episode of Nip/Tuck (above right).

And so it goes!

Wearing Yves Saint Laurent

“Mrs.” Jimmy Fallon on television’s Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

Someday Funnies

Wearing StyleWe

Filipe Duarte femulating in the 2007 Portuguese film A Outra Margem

They’re all guys

Saturday night, TCM showed the film Saint Jack, which is about Jack Flowers, an American hustler in early 1970s Singapore, who dreams of building a fortune by running a brothel and returning to the States to lead a life of luxury. 

Ben Gazzara plays Jack and early on in the film, he escorts a visitor through a red-light district of Singapore where beautiful ladies abound.

Jack’s visitor comments, “The women here are all so attractive.”

Jack responds, “They’re all guys.”

Wow – I did not see that coming!

“Singapore’s Bugis Street was renowned as a meeting place for trans women to mix, mingle and have fun during the 1950s-1980s. Each evening, a fabulous parade of glamorous trans women would walk up-and-down the rundown streets at Bugis Junction, flirting with tourists, sailors and G.I.s, often charging them to have their photograph taken, inviting them to a bar for a drink, or taking them to a quiet room (or rooftop) for sex.

“Bugis Street was a popular area for touring British servicemen in the 1950s, who became fans/lovers of many of the trans women, and rechristened the area ‘Boogie Street’—a mispronunciation of the district’s name that stuck in 1970s with the rise of disco.

“For thirty years, Bugis Street thrived as a haven for trans women and their admirers, until the government cracked down on what was described as ‘shameful’ and ‘lewd behavior’ in the 1970s. Many servicemen were arrested at gunpoint, tourists were threatened and frightened away, the bars were closed and many trans women were arrested. Eventually the hard-line puritans won and old Bugis Street was demolished in the mid-1980s and replaced by a shopping mall and entertainment outlet.” (source: dangerousminds.net)

The image above is not from the film; rather, it is a collage of the girls who actually populated Bugis Street, circa 1970.

By the way, Saint Jack was very good and Ben Gazzara was excellent.

Wearing Venus

Singapore’s Bugis Street ladies, circa 1970

Someday Funnies

Wearing Nana Jacqueline

Professional femulator Louis Martin, circa 1910

Slipped My Mind

I am so old that when I started femulating, nylon stockings had seams (that a lady had to keep straight). Beneath her outfit, a lady always wore a girdle and a slip. And to complete her outfit, a hat and gloves. Except for hats, I admit to wearing all those items. 

Early on as a novice femulator, seamed stockings gave way to seamless stockings, which soon gave way to pantyhose, Meanwhile, gloves, hats, girdles and slips disappeared from most ladies’ wardrobes.

To this day, I still wear a girdle and my hosiery switches between thigh-highs and pantyhose depending on the length (or lack thereof) of my skirt. I gave up wearing gloves long ago because gloves did not get along with my press-on nails. But it slipped my mind why I stopped wearing slips.

Slips are helpful when you are wearing other layers like bras or shapewear, since slips smooth over any bumps from hardware, closures or digging waistbands. Without a slip, your outer layers of a blouse or dress may hug to these other items, but wearing a slip gives you more coverage for smooth lines. Spanx sells undies that serve a similar purpose, but they are not as elegant as a classic slip.

I invite you to read Angela Friedman’s “Top reasons to wear a silk slip.” Here is a summary of her top seven reasons...

1. Keep your legs from sticking to your skirt fabric

2. Keep your fancy dresses clean for a 2nd wearing

3. Add a layer under a semi-sheer outfit

4. Feel like a glamorous, Old Hollywood starlet

5. For a peek of lace - and prevent wardrobe malfunctions

6. Smooth your silhouette and hide VPL

7. Life is too short to wear ugly pajamas!

...but read the whole article and you will be motivated to slip on a slip like I am. 

By the way, last week I watched one of my favorite science fiction films, The Time Machine, and I noted that in the year 802,701, all men and women wore dresses (see photo above). I also noted that no one wore slips under their dresses. How unladylike!

Wearing Bebe

Femulating in the mid-1960’s

Someday Funnies

Wearing Charo Ruiz

Professional femulators, the Fono Fools (Joe Price and David Hummel) circa 1961.

Dressing Your Age, Continued

Dee responded to Friday’s post, Dressing Your Age, More or Less.

Reading Sandy's post on “Dressing Your Age, More or Less,” I have to wonder how one goes through life with such a condescending attitude towards a fellow traveler. 

It boggles my mind when femulators (thanks, Stana) can have these two thoughts going on in their head simultaneously:

1. When I’m out in public, I expect others to be tolerant of me; and

2. OMG, do you see what she’s wearing?

In short, tolerance for me, but none for thee.

We don’t want people making fun of us, but we are happy to jump on others because they don’t dress the way we approve? How hypocritical. How condescending. How rude.

Here is a sample.

“Truly, I wonder who these sisters believe they are appealing to and I have come to the conclusion that their choices are determined by wanting to look like someone that they themselves would be attracted to, as well as what clothing they have access to purchasing. Maybe they only feel comfortable buying the discards at the local goodwill or someplace else that affords cheap prices and anonymity while shopping.”

Rubbish.

Every post Stana includes a picture which says “Femulate Her.” There are a lot of cute outfits and some might be “age inappropriate,” according to some. 

I suggest instead that instead of bowing to someone else’s judgment, we make our own decisions and ignore judgments like the one above.

Recently, I had a great interaction with a store manager, Kira, in Melbourne, Australia. She asked me if the clothes I was wearing made me feel confident because they should make you feel confident. All I know is that I walked into her store and saw the top she was wearing and I decided I wanted that top. She’s 22 and a genetic girl and gorgeous – I’m none of the above – and I bought the top and wore it out of the store with confidence (see photo above).

Enough with the shaming of others because they don’t dress the way you think they should. If you want tolerance for yourself for how you dress, you must have tolerance for how others dress. Otherwise, you’re not helping our community, you’re harming it.

Wearing Venus

Femulating in the early 1960’s

Someday Funnies

Wearing Elisabetta Franchi

Femulating in the Roaring 20’s