Dressing Your Age, Continued

Dee responded to Friday’s post, Dressing Your Age, More or Less.

Reading Sandy's post on “Dressing Your Age, More or Less,” I have to wonder how one goes through life with such a condescending attitude towards a fellow traveler. 

It boggles my mind when femulators (thanks, Stana) can have these two thoughts going on in their head simultaneously:

1. When I’m out in public, I expect others to be tolerant of me; and

2. OMG, do you see what she’s wearing?

In short, tolerance for me, but none for thee.

We don’t want people making fun of us, but we are happy to jump on others because they don’t dress the way we approve? How hypocritical. How condescending. How rude.

Here is a sample.

“Truly, I wonder who these sisters believe they are appealing to and I have come to the conclusion that their choices are determined by wanting to look like someone that they themselves would be attracted to, as well as what clothing they have access to purchasing. Maybe they only feel comfortable buying the discards at the local goodwill or someplace else that affords cheap prices and anonymity while shopping.”

Rubbish.

Every post Stana includes a picture which says “Femulate Her.” There are a lot of cute outfits and some might be “age inappropriate,” according to some. 

I suggest instead that instead of bowing to someone else’s judgment, we make our own decisions and ignore judgments like the one above.

Recently, I had a great interaction with a store manager, Kira, in Melbourne, Australia. She asked me if the clothes I was wearing made me feel confident because they should make you feel confident. All I know is that I walked into her store and saw the top she was wearing and I decided I wanted that top. She’s 22 and a genetic girl and gorgeous – I’m none of the above – and I bought the top and wore it out of the store with confidence (see photo above).

Enough with the shaming of others because they don’t dress the way you think they should. If you want tolerance for yourself for how you dress, you must have tolerance for how others dress. Otherwise, you’re not helping our community, you’re harming it.

Wearing Venus

Femulating in the early 1960’s

Someday Funnies

Wearing Elisabetta Franchi

Femulating in the Roaring 20’s

My Achy Left Foot

Thursday, I had to attend another Zoom meeting of my ham radio club’s board of directors. Since I am the only girl on the board, I like to dress pretty and had a new sleeveless dress to wear that demanded that I shave body parts I have not shaved while I was recuperating from my osteoarthritis. 

Wednesday morning, I spent about 45 minutes shaving those body parts and was surprised it did not take as long as I expected. (All those years using chemicals to remove leg hair have taken its toll and the hair on my legs is very sparse, which simplified that part of the hair removal process.)

Mid-Thursday morning, I began getting ready for the 1 PM Zoom meeting. I was good to go about a 45 minutes early, so I decided to experiment with different shoes to see how my achy left foot would get along with different footwear.

My Nine West slingback pumps with four-inch heels lasted about five minutes. Next I tried a pair of over-the-knee boots from Just Fab, which were more comfortable than the slingbacks, but not by much. So I switched to a pair of Nine West pumps with a kitten heel. They were pain-free and I wore them for the remainder of the afternoon.

I also wore my new A-line houndstooth dress from Venus and was very pleased with its quality and its fit, as well as how nice it looked on me, in my humble opinion (see the accompanying photo).

Wearing New York & Company

Femulating in India

Someday Funnies

Wearing New York & Company

Femulating for Halloween in the mid-1960’s.

Someday Funnies

Wearing Zuhair Murad

Femulating in the Easter Parade

Dressing Your Age, More or Less

Sandy responded to Monday’s post, Can I picture Helen Mirren wearing it?

Just wanted to heartily agree with you about deciding if an outfit is age-ish appropriate.

I do not understand how (seemingly) most of our sisters go through their journey trying to look like they are 22, when so many clues give them away.

I mean, I get it. Most of us go through a phase of sorts that feels like we are teens, trying on looks, textures, attitudes. But I think we all have to give a nod to reality – that we tend to and probably should, skew toward the age-appropriate.

Truly, I wonder who these sisters believe they are appealing to and I have come to the conclusion that their choices are determined by wanting to look like someone that they themselves would be attracted to, as well as what clothing they have access to purchasing. Maybe they only feel comfortable buying the discards at the local goodwill or someplace else that affords cheap prices and anonymity while shopping.

Either way, I think it casts a pall over crossdressing/gendering in general because the public can look at those sisters and cast them as pervy and then we, who might try to dress pretty/classy/age-appropriate, get painted the same way. That’s unfortunate.

What’s more is that I think women’s fashion has evolved beyond the age of our grandmother’s hausfrau dresses and other unsexy outfits. These days, most ciswomen still want to be considered kinda hip, if not young and pretty, and there are many styles out there now to accommodate (including hairstyles). I think it’s sad that there are many sisters out there who don’t know the difference and don’t get with the program.

I also understand “to each, their own,” but from a girl who prefers the looks that I think honor ciswomen, by trying to emulate them more: girl next door,  soccer mom, business woman.

I do find some of the fetish looks make my hobby feel a little dirty and seedy (if that makes any sense).

Wearing St. John

Dressing my age – NOT!

Someday Funnies

Wearing Free the Roses

Alan Manson femulating in the 1943 film This is the Army.
You can view this femulating-packed film on YouTube.

Getting Good to Go

On my last trip to Hamvention
(Hope it’s not my last trip to Hamvention!)

Lazy lady that I am, I stopped shaving my body parts when it was evident that my osteoarthritis would prevent me from going out en femme any time soon. 

But...

“The time has come,” the Walrus said, “To put on a dress and go out en femme.”

I am feeling better and have been invited to lunch with some lady friends later this month. I think I can manage a few hours out especially if I wear flats, but now I face the daunting task of removing all that hair!

I thought about cheating and wearing black tights to avoid shaving my legs, but I still have to deal with the rest of my body hair and removing leg hair is relatively easy and so it goes.

By the way, I have sent my regrets to my ham radio friends informing them that I will not be going to Ohio next month to attend Hamvention. I may be good to go out to a local restaurant for a few hours, but I am not quite good to go to Dayton and be on and off my feet for the three-day convention.

I so look forward to my Hamvention trips and was very much looking forward to going this year especially since the convention was cancelled the last two years due to the pandemic. But I finally bit the bullet, put on my big girl panties and admitted that this year was a no-go, too.

Darn it!

Wearing A.L.C. dress and Valentino tote and sandals

Three gorgeous girls out in their LBD‘s

Someday Funnies

Wearing Bebe

Will Larkins, Floridian student trans activist

Can I picture Helen Mirren wearing it?

Girls like us receive a lot of flack about how we dress. Specifically about how we don’t dress our age. That girls like us dress like girls half our age (and look ridiculous doing so).

I plead guilty of not dressing my age. In my defense, I claim that I don’t look my age – that I look younger than my 71 years, so why not take advantage of that fact and dress like a 50-year-old woman.

And when considering whether I look good in any outfit I am wearing, I use the following checklist:

1. Do I look good?

2. Do I feel good?

3. Does it say something positive (and perhaps truthful) about my rank in life?

4. Can I picture Helen Mirren wearing it?

In my opinion, question number 4 does it for me! If I can imagine the 70-something Ms. Mirren wearing the same outfit that I am wearing, then I believe it is perfectly appropriate for this 70-something femulator.

Wearing Joie

Femulating in the shower