Miss Stana Muses

Help! I Need Somebody Dept.

Saturday morning, my wife asked me for assistance. She did not know how to tighten her bra straps and wondered if I knew how to do it. Of course, I knew how and I adjusted hers to her liking.

Needless to say, I was very surprised that she did not know how to do it herself since like me, she has been a bra wearer for over 50 years! I guess she was just lucky and all her previous bras fit fine from the get-go.

Sean Hayes Femulates Dept.

Sean Hayes plays a woman in a new film titled Lazy Susan. You can view the trailer on YouTube and read all about it at the Advocate.

For those who are keeping score, Hayes is femulating in this flick because he playing a cisgender woman and not a transwoman! Watching the trailer, I’d say his femulation is very good.

(Thank you, Jen, for alerting me about this film.)

Wearing Jessica Howard

Five fellows femulating, circa 1925

Someday Funnies

Wearing Cynthia Rowley

Lovely Leon Sanders dressed to the nines for a womanless wedding, circa 1955

Looks

Look What I Found Dept.

Weather-permitting, I walk up to the dead end and back every day (about 1 mile roundtrip according to the pedometer). If I have the time and energy, I take a detour into the 5000 acres of woods that surround my neck of the woods. Since I have plenty of time these days (don’t we all), more often than not I take the detour instead of the boring dead end route.

I seldom encounter wildlife in the woods (a pheasant, red tail hawk and bald eagle were recent exceptions). Seems that the deer and black bears prefer my back yard to the woods!

I do encounter the remains of motor vehicles. A rusted out Hudson Hornet and the chassis of a 1959 Volkswagen Beetle were my most recent vehicle sightings. (I know it was a ’59 “Bug” because the part number on its transaxle told me so.)

“Big deal,” you say.

I would agree with that assessment except that I found these vehicles in the middle of the woods with no roads or trails in sight. It’s as if a helicopter (or UFO) dropped the Hudson and Beetle into the woods from above!

Look at the Birdie Dept.

Commenting on my previous post, some readers asked to see me in my new outfit. Your wish is my command and I promise that after the outfit is delivered, I will do a photoshoot modeling all my recent acquisitions that have yet to see the light of day.

Wearing Cynthia Rowley

Glamorous Femulations

When life gives you lemons, Shop!

I receive emails everyday tempting me to buy a new dress, a new pair of heels or a new something else. I consider perusing the offerings, but resist because I don’t know when I will have the opportunity to go out dressed to the nines again.

As it is, I have a  backlog of new outfits to wear out and did not need to add to that backlog. So I promised myself that I would not buy anything for milady until the pandemic blows over.

Then I received an email from JustFab advertising a 60% off everything sale. I was a good girl and deleted the email without visiting their website.

But after two weeks without leaving the premises, my bushel basket of lemons was overflowing. I needed a break from the inaction, so when the 60% sale arrived in my inbox again, I took the plunge and visited the JustFab.

The first thing I encountered was the outfit you see on the right: a pink tweed cropped jacket and matching tweed high-waisted shorts.

“I wish I had the legs to pull off that outfit,” I thought to myself.

Then I reconsidered, “Maybe I do have the legs to pull off that outfit!”

So I added the outfit to my virtual shopping cart, paid the virtual cashier and sipped a glass of lemonade waiting for the man to deliver to milady.

Wearing New York & Company

Sailor femulating aboard the S.S. Caronia, circa 1955

It’s time to admit it

“Let’s stop beating around the bush. We don’t just have the worst President in the history of the United States. We have no President. We have a psychotic evil blob at the wheel who goes around insulting and taunting everyone as his own ship sinks and people drown.”

On Sunday, “Donald Trump bragged that perhaps only a hundred thousand Americans will die because of the actions he’s taken, instead of a couple million Americans. Wait, what action? He’s done nothing. All of the shutdowns and lockdowns have been done at the state or local level. Governors are scavenging for their own medical supplies. States are forced to compete with each other for resources because there’s no coordination at the federal level.

“Actually, this is worse than if there were no President of the United States. Imagine if the office were simply vacant. In such case any competent officials in the federal government would be doing the best they could with this crisis, of their own accord. Instead they all have to answer to the psychotic blob, who refuses to do the job but who insists on incoherently and vindictively interjecting himself into the decision making process anyway.”

The above text comes from the Palmer Report by Bill Palmer and matches my sentiments exactly.

I live in the epicenter of the Trump Virus and people are scared to death, while that narcissistic woman-hating transphobe sits in the White House giving himself a “10” for the job he has done handling this disaster. If he had been on the case from the get-go instead of claiming that the virus was a “hoax” week after week, we would not be in the predicament we find ourselves in today.

Damn you, Donald, and damn everyone who defends you.

The Woodman

Stana Goes to the Movies

On Monday, Woody Allen’s memoir Apropos of Nothing was published. Being a big fan of The Woodman’s films, I ordered the Kindle edition of the book and read its 400 pages in three days.

Let me say up front that I never paid much attention to the allegations of sexual assault against Allen. I considered the source (Mia Farrow) and did not put much stock in her claims. After reading Allen’s memoir, I am convinced that Farrow is a liar and that Allen is innocent, just as the authorities determined.

That out of the way, I thoroughly enjoyed the book. I had many laugh-out-loud moments reading it. And it moved me to pull out my collection of Woody Allen DVDs to revisit his films.

Connecting Woody Allen films to the main topic of this blog, I can recall three crossdressing moments in his films.

In Celebrity, 6-foot-tall actress Famke Janssen is mistaken for a crossdresser.

One of the seven stories in Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex * But Were Afraid To Ask, involves the misadventures of a crossdresser played by Lou Jacobi (photo above).

In Broadway Danny Rose, Milton Berle femulates Glinda “the Good Witch” from The Wizard of Oz riding a float in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade. (Broadway Danny Rose is one of my favorite films. It is a laugh riot and features Nick Apollo Forte, who lived in my old neighborhood.)

Besides Broadway Danny Rose, my other favorite Allen films are Annie Hall, Love and Death, Hannah and Her Sisters, Manhattan, Midnight in Paris, Radio Days and Zelig. My mother hated his films – I could never understand why, but each to her own.

Wearing Boston Proper

Bill Switzer and Daniel Clark femulate on television's Eerie Indiana: The Other Dimension in 1998 (view it here).

Peacock

Stana Goes to the Movies

Peacock is a 2010 film starring Cillian Murphy, Ellen Page, and Susan Sarandon. I knew nothing about this film going in except that Murphy crossdressed in it; after his great crossdressing performance in Breakfast on Pluto, I thought I would give Peacock a peek.

It was a very interesting film and held my attention from beginning to end. It really was not a film about being trans, although there are trans elements in the film that many of us can identify with.

I am not a psychologist, nor do I play one on television, so I am not sure what to call the mental condition that Murphy played in the film. I guess he had a multiple personality disorder (distinct male and a female personalities) and his deceased abusive mother was the cause.

Murphy's femulation was very good. As a female, he/she passed and none of the other characters in the film figured him/her out. In reality, I think that someone might have put two and two together, but that did not occur in this story.

One thing that bothered me about Murphy's femulation is that he/she wore male underwear (a T-shirt and briefs) under his/her female clothing. In my humble opinion, someone with his/her disorder would wear female underwear when he/she was in female mode, but that is just my opinion.

The underwear issue did not ruin the film for me and I recommend Peacock to all.

Wearing Cynthia Rowley

Cillian Murphy femulating in the 2005 film Breakfast on Pluto.

No Questions Asked

Stana Goes to the Movies

Regular readers are familiar with the daily Femulator spot at the bottom of each blog post. In that spot, I feature images of femulators that I have found hither and yon.

Often, the source of those images are theatrical films and television shows. It seems to be a bottomless source for guys dressing up as gals.

Years ago, while I was searching for femulator images, I came across the photo above from a 1951 film titled No Questions Asked. The photo showed an actor in 1950’s high glam fashion and he looked so good that I thought “he” might have been an actress playing a man impersonating a woman. But, in fact, the high glam gal was actor William Reynolds.

I was so impressed with his femulation that I sought out more information about the film, as well as more images of his femulation in that film. Turned out that there was not much on the Internet beyond the film’s entry in IMDb.

I even sought out the film itself, but I could not find a copy on VHS or DVD. Evidently, TCM had the film and had shown it a couple of times, but of course, I missed it whenever it was shown. So I kept it in mind while I continued searching for other femulations.

Some time later, I learned that the film had been released on DVD, so I ordered a copy and after the mailman dropped it off, I dropped everything to watch the film.

Here is the plot summary from IMDb:

“Steve Keiver, young lawyer working for an insurance company, hears his boss remark that he'd pay a large sum ‘no questions asked’ for return of stolen property to avoid paying a much larger claim. On his own initiative, Steve arranges such a deal, earning a nice commission. But he catches the eye of gangsters who think he’s the ideal middleman for future similar deals...many of them. As Steve is drawn in deeper, the police take an interest in him, and he’s ripe for a doublecross.”

IMDb does not mention the femulation, so I will fill in that part of the plot:. The gangsters hire two guys, who dress as gals and go to the “Ladies’ Lounge” of a Broadway theater to rob the female patrons of their jewelry.

The blond femulator, actor William Phipps, enters the Ladie’s Lounge of the Broadway theater as if he owns it. (You go, girl!)

The brunette femulator, actor William Reynolds, follows brandishing a handgun and a dainty purse. Don’t you just love the outfits the boys put together for their caper?

Blondie relieves the ladies of their jewelry. The ladies were completely fooled by the boys’ femulations and during questioning by the police, one victim remarked that the lady robbers were very pretty.

Sans jewelry, the ladies are forced into the back room of the lounge.

With the ladies safely stashed away in the back room, the femulators prepare to exit the premises.

The femulators sashay out of the theater to their getaway car.

Inside the car, the femulators switch from girl mode to boy mode. How they managed to accomplish this in the cramped back seat of the getaway car is not revealed.

Using descriptions given by the ladies in the lounge, the police produced composite drawings of the perps.

The blonde and brunette femulators in boy mode.

The hero of the film identified the boys as female impersonators from the burlesque. The blonde femulator corrected our hero and said they were “artists” from vaudeville.

By the way, I found it interesting how the “good girl” in the film, played by Jean Hagen (left), resembled William Reynolds en femme. They could be sisters!

Anyway, in addition to the excellent femulations, I enjoyed the film in its entirety. It is great film noir.

Wearing Cynthia Rowley

William Phipps’ test shot en femme for the 1951 film No Questions Asked

Maintaining Appearances

It snowed and rained here Monday, so since I was stuck indoors, I painted the kitchen.

Tuesday, I woke up exhausted from going up and down a step ladder all day Monday. (I knew I should have worn flats.)

Too tired to do anything strenuous, I decided to maintain the blog web page. Maintenance was long overdo and I deleted a bunch of old and dead links and updated a few links that had new URLs.

If any of you have a website or blog that has a link to Femulate.org and it is NOT in my list of “T-People & Friends Links,” please let me know (stana-stana at sbcglobal.net) and I will add your website or blog to my list to return the favor.

Wearing Wholesale7

Steve Martin femulates in the 1982 film Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid