Dress to Shop

Meg wrote, “When you’re dressed and shop, what do you wear?

"I'm planning to talk to saleswomen and ask to try clothes on next time I go. I’ve wanted to but never done it so far.

“Is a dress better than a skirt/blouse? If I’m wearing the latter and I want to try on a dress, I have to remove both and there may be many buttons. If I wear the former, I need to find a top to go with a bottom or vice-versa when I want to try one on and if the dress goes over my head, my wig could get out-of-sorts (also with a pullover top, hence the worry about buttons).

“How about sharing your experiences?”

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I'll gladly share my experience, Meg.

When I go shopping and plan to try clothes on in the store, I wear something that is easy to take off and put back on, so usually a dress without a lot of buttons. Also, something that has a wide collar opening like a scoop neck or V-neck, so as not to muss up my hair and makeup when I pull it off and on (so avoid anything with a turtleneck).

The best thing I ever wore shopping was a dress that had a zipper in front that zipped from the neckline to the hemline of the dress. I could get in and out of that dress quick like a bunny.

Also, to minimize changing back into the outfit you wore into the store, take as many outfits as the store allows to the dressing room. Or shop in a store where there is personalized service with a salesperson at your beck and call to fetch outfits for you while you are in the dressing room.

If you are shopping for a skirt to match a top or vice versa, then that is a different story and you will want to wear whatever you are trying to match, unless it is so generic that you can find something in the store to use for matching.

On the other hand, if you are just skirt shopping, for example, wear an easy on-and-off dress. When you find the skirts you want to try on, grab a top, too, so that you will have something to model with the skirts. Of course, you don't have to purchase the top, but then you might find one that goes so nicely with the skirt you are buying that you will just have to buy the top, too!

I hope that helps!

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Occasionally, I receive e-mails asking for advice. Often, the writers of these e-mails indicate that they are hesitant about writing to me for advice because they don't want to bother me.

On the contrary, I love receiving e-mails asking for advice. My maternal side loves to help others if she can, so please feel free to ask. Maybe I can help you and maybe you will help me by expanding my knowledge of the transworld. And maybe our e-mail exchange will inspire me to write an interesting blog posting (like this one).

So, use the “send me e-mail” link on the right to write to me.

Wearing St. John

Advertisement for an “All-Male Review” in Atlantic City, circa 1969

Someday Funnies

Wearing Walter Baker

Harold Perrineau (right) femulating in the 2000 film Woman on Top

Gender Is Over

“When people call me a girl or misgender me I don’t really care. To me, gender is over. Gender is so last year.”

That is a snippet from an excellent article written by a 13-year-old named C.J. I think is a perfect piece to conclude the previous three posts and I thank Velma for alerting me to the article. Without further adieu, I invite you to read what C.J. had to say here.

Wearing Ann Taylor

At a recent womanless beauty pageant, I’m guessing that’s Mom in the middle, her son on the right and his friend on the left.

Female-to-Male-to-Female Crossdressing

Don’t know if you read the Comments on my posts, so I am repeating one from Angel Amore commenting on my Guilt-Free Guilty Pleasure post.

“It is almost to the point, not quite, but almost, that when women get all dolled up in ultra femme finery that they are crossdressing. They are dressing as crossdressed men. Who would have thought that the ‘backwardization’ (new word alert) of clothing would be happening this fast. Seems like it's right out of Fictionmania.”

Indeed! Angel makes a good point.

Today, a woman is more likely to wear slacks than a skirt or a dress. Go anywhere and most of the women you encounter are wearing some kind of bifurcated bottom wear. Even at formal events, where you might expect to see women in skirted clothing, women are wearing formal jumpsuits rather than evening gowns and cocktail dresses.

The only place you are likely to encounter women in skirts/dresses are in professional settings like law offices. And even then, they are likely to wear masculine-inspired skirt suits so as not to appear too feminine.

On a personal note, I cannot recall the last time I saw my spouse or my daughter in skirted clothing. Nor can I recall the last time I saw my spouse wearing makeup. I guess they are depending on the man of the house to represent the “feminine” side of our family.

And what’s “feminine” anyway?

Dictionary.com defines it as “pertaining to a woman or girl.” Therefore, with regards to appearance, if women choose to wear slacks, flats, short hair and no makeup, then who’s to say that isn’t “feminine?” And if men choose to wear skirts, heels, long hair and makeup, who’s to say that isn’t “masculine?” It’s not feminine or masculine by old school standards, but the old school is closed and boarded up.

What you see on the runway, on the red carpet and in Vogue is not what you will see on the street or in the mall. A woman who is dressed to kill according to old school standards may be a male-to-female crossdresser or she may be a woman dressing like a male-to-female crossdresser – she certainly does not represent the average 21st Century woman.

Where does that leave the 21st Century male-to-female crossdresser? Does she adapt and dress like a 21st Century woman or does she become an anomaly by continuing to dress like her mother dressed in the 20th Century?

Wearing DressBarn

Sadri Alisi and Izzet Günay femulating in the 1964 film Fıstık Gibi Maşallah (a Turkish version of Some Like It Hot). The film was remade as Fıstık Gibi in 1970. You can view the original here.

Guilt-Free Guilty Pleasure

Couples going out with both the male and female
dressed en femme is becoming more common

In yesterday’s post, I mentioned that womanless beauty pageants have increased in quantity in recent years. I could attribute that to the popularity of this blog, but I won’t! 😁

But I do attribute the increased occurrences of womanless pageants to the increased popularity of crossdressing.

Fifty years ago, when I was squeezing into my mother’s panty girdle, I had no idea why I was doing it except (1) that I liked it and (2) I better keep it to myself because I might get run out of town on a rail if it got around that I was dressing pretty.

Today, crossdressers, drag artists and transwomen are in the news and the media like never before. And the Internet is awash with crossdressing. As a result, crossdressing has become more acceptable and except in some political and so-called “Christian” circles, crossdressing is no longer an abomination. Rather, it has become a guilty pleasure without the guilt to be enjoyed whenever the mood strikes you.

So-inclined males see crossdressing everywhere and feel encouraged to try it themselves. I don’t have to tell you that once you dress pretty, you never want to dress any other way if you can help it.

Never before have so many males been so open about crossdressing... especially young males. They crossdress with great abandon and don’t care who knows it. And that encourages other males who may have been on the cusp, to try it themselves. And on and on and on.

And the popularity of womanless pageants is a by-product of the acceptance and popularity of crossdressing.

Wearing Boston Proper

Professional femulator Danny La Rue, circa 1965

No Girls Allowed

Seems to me that there are now more womanless beauty pageants than ever. In the past, most of them were put on by high schools and civic organizations trying to raise funds for one thing or another. And most of them occurred in the southern USA.

Today, they are being put on by grammar schools, middle schools, high schools and colleges everywhere, not only in the southern USA. And when I say “everywhere,” I mean in other countries as well as throughout the USA.

Not only has the quantity of the pageants increased, but the quality of the pageants has improved, too. Some of the faux girls are drop dead gorgeous. Kudos to the moms and sisters who do their sons’ and brothers’ makeup and hair and lend them their evening gowns and cocktail dresses.

And the way the faux girls expertly walk in high heels makes one wonder how long they have been practicing. Do their stage mothers force their sons to practice weeks in advance of the pageant date?

And it makes one also wonder how many faux girls continue femulating after the pageant?

Wearing Lemoniade

This image has been labeled a “womanless beauty pageant” photo on various websites, but I believe it is a Halloween photo with the participants dressed as characters from The Hunger Games. Whether the participant on the left is a male or a female has yet to be determined. If anyone can shed a light on that mystery, I’d appreciate hearing from you.

A Good Fit

JustFab had a clearance sale last week and I ordered a pair of shoes and a dress.

The shoes were a pair I had seen weeks ago, but did not purchase because I assumed they would eventually go on sale. The dress was an afterthought – I intended to only to buy the shoes, but was tempted by the ridiculously low prices of the dresses on sale. (With a credit I had, the shoes and dress only cost me $13.15 out of pocket.)

Sophie Peep Toe Pump is nude with black ankle straps and 3.5” heels. Made of faux leather/suede, the buckle on each ankle strap has a cute little gold padlock.

Button Front Sweater Dress is striped with a V-neck made of rib knit fabric. It is a midi with a buttoned front and belted waist closure. It clings to the body and shows off every curve – at least that was how the dress looked on the model.

I placed my order last Monday and had low expectations on its delivery – JustFab has been notoriously slow in the past, so I was surprised when they informed me that FedEx would deliver my order the following Monday (yesterday). I was even more surprised when the order showed up a day early on Sunday!

Size-wise, I have been having good luck ordering clothing from JustFab. Their dresses, skirts and tops in size XL are just fab on me. But I hold my breath regarding shoe size. More often than not, their largest size (12) is too small for me and I have to return them. So when the package arrived on Sunday, I immediately tried on the shoes and voila! they were a perfect fit.

Next I tried on the dress and it fit, too, and just like the model, it clings to my body and shows off all my curves. 

I can’t wait to go out wearing my new dress and heels! 

Wearing Fuzzi

A Tokyo Yomiuri Giants baseball player femulating for the team's womanless beauty pageant.
(Thank you, Zoe, for this news.)

Losing an Earring and Finding Something Better

By Michelle Wright

Recently, I was one of the speakers at a Transgender Identity Awareness training session for National Health Service (NHS) psychologists in Scotland’s Fife region. My role was to speak from my own life about the lived experience of trans people. 

At the end of the session, the hall became empty rather quickly and I found myself one of the last to put on their coat. As I pulled my scarf around my neck I felt it – a small tug to my right earlobe and then a release. One of my earrings had departed for its own kind of freedom. My hand felt for where it should be but only confirmed that it had gone. It was one of a lovely pair of half moon hoops. As an automatic reaction to this small crisis, my eyes started to scan the floor. 

Just then one of the hosts of the event, I'll call her Eveline, and another lady were leaving together. At the exit door they shouted their goodbyes: “Bye Michelle.” 

Our eyes met and in reply all that came out was, “I have lost an earring.” 

I recall the sound of my voice – the mixture of desperation and disappointment wrapped into a cry for help, a kind of strangled feminine panic. Both ladies turned on their heels and came towards me. They started scanning the floor as I was. Without further communication we fanned out as group and covered the whole area. 

“What color is it?” 

“Is it valuable?” 

“Have you checked if it’s stuck to your clothes?” 

“Leave your name at reception in case it’s found later.”

Eventually I had to admit that it was not going to be found. It was probably lodged in some hidden spot laughing at our search efforts. For sure it was going to remain free. I said my thanks and we all made our way out of the hall. Small hand waves and we were all gone. 

Back in my car, it struck me just what had happened. I had just experienced that elusive thing that all in the trans community look for. My unexpected earring loss had brought me together with my gender peers in a common feminine mission; something all cis women will have lived through at some point or other – the loss of a treasured piece of jewelry and three women bonding together at a higher level of understanding. 

I lost an earring, and found something priceless – acceptance.

Wearing Madeleine

2019 Miss Engineering womanless beauty pageant contestant

Someday Funnies

Wearing Lemoniade

Michael Andrews femulating in the 1987 film Surrender.

Lovely Today

Tuesday, I had an appointment at the vein clinic. It was a six-month follow-up to check for blood clots. Actually, it was more like 11 months because I had to cancel two previous appointments.

I awoke to heavy rain Tuesday morning with more to pore throughout the day. With that forecast, I thought about going to the appointment in boy mode rather than as a woman. But for consistency, I decided to put on my big girl panties and go en femme because I had gone to my previous appointment as a woman.

My appointment was at 1 PM, so I had plenty of time to get ready. I decided to wear the new dress from Venus that failed me in October when a loose button fell to the floor just as I was getting ready to go out. I accessorized with earrings, necklace, watch, black bag and black patent pumps (see photo).

I left home at 12:15 PM and arrived 10 minutes early for my 1 PM appointment accompanied by heavy rain during the entire trip. I was able to park in the spot closest to the door of the doctor’s office and the rain let up a bit, so with an umbrella in hand, I did not get wet.

I checked in with the receptionist and she greeted me with a big smile and, “Hi, Ms. . Please be seated.” 

I did not have to say a word – I guess my previous visit made an impression.

My visit was basically identical to my previous visit. The only difference was that they performed an ultrasound on both legs instead of just the leg that had vein removal. As a result, the appointment was twice as long. And just like my previous appointment, the doctor was his usual pleasant self and did not show any reaction to my feminine presentation.

I checked out with the woman who handles appointments and she said I was done – no further appointments unless there was a problem.

I exited with “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

She replied, “Same to you. And by the way, you look lovely today.”

Wearing Saks

Fred Armisen femulating on an episode of television’s Portlandia.