Victoria Beckham and Four Texans

Wearing Victoria Beckham.

Four for Texas (Huckabay, TX, 2011)

Femulating Her

The intention of the daily Femulate Her image is to inspire you (and me) to emulate the female who appears in that image.

Did you know that there have been 2,682 Femulate Her images?

I select the daily image according to my personal tastes choosing outfits that I would like to wear if I had the body and/or pocketbook to match.

On rare occasions, I am able to afford and fit into my dream outfits. So I thought it would be fun to compare the original dream image with an image of me in the same dream outfit.

Here are four (and I have more).

Wearing Ralph Lauren.

Actor Tad Hilgenbrink in the 2008 film Curiosity of Chance.

Alison's Favorite Photos (of Alison!)

Dear Stana,

For consideration in your favorite pictures segments, I have attached a couple of my favorite selfies. I am a retired T-girl living in a small town in south-central Ontario, Canada.

Like many of us, I have been dressing since I was 10 or 11 years old. Adulthood and a career allowed me to build and maintain a reasonable closet full of femme clothes. Singlehood allows me to dress as much or as little as I like. However, for most of my life, this was behind closed doors and drapes.

Discovering your blog a couple of years ago and following you in your adventures has given me the incentive and courage I needed to venture out en femme in my local towns. I generally prefer to "blend in" rather than "stand out," so while I run most of my local errands en femme, I will mostly be seen in jeans and a sweater rather than a dress or skirt.

However, I do occasionally venture out in an "office girl" outfit of skirt and heels if I have an errand to run where I would not look too out of place. So far, I have been pleased with the general lack of notice taken of me in either guise.

I have recently opened up a Flickr account as "alisonmcd1" and am about to upload some video to YouTube as "alisontrt" to see what the world, in general, and the T-world, in particular, thinks of my alter ego.

Yours in sisterhood,

Alison MacDonald

Got selfies? My open invitation to post your favorite photo along with the story behind it and the reason it is your favorite photo still stands, so don't be shy, send me your fave foto. ― Stana

Wearing Zuihar Murad dress and Christian Louboutin shoes.

Claude Brosset femulating in the 1976 French film Body of My Enemy.

This is me and me is she

There is a difference between being a woman and wanting to be a woman.

There are cisgender males who are women. We call them "transsexuals." Then there are cisgender males who want to be women. They are wannabes and we call them "crossdressers."

I believe I am a woman. All signs point in that direction, but there is always a little doubt in my mind.

I am naturally "feminine," that is, my speech, mannerisms, personality and psyche match up with society's expectations for the female gender. (However, when I present as male, some people misinterpret my femininity and think I am gay.)

And when I say "naturally feminine," I mean that I am not faking it. I am not purposely acting feminine. This is me and me is she.

So why is there any doubt in my mind?

I am attracted to the ultra femme side of appearing female. I am a fashionista and I want to look gorgeous. So when I present as a woman, there is no doubt that my presentation is ultra feminine. I dress to impress that I am a female.

Yes, there are plenty of females who wear jeans and tees, but that's not me. Jeans and tees are what I wear when I dress to impress that I am a guy not a gal.

Does my attraction to appearing ultra femme make me less of a woman and more of a guy who wants to be a woman?

Maybe, maybe not.

Wearing Ann Taylor

Two lads, circa 1910.

My Advice

Wearing Versace.

Womanless beauty pageant contestant Number 17.

Lofty Causes and Every Day Causes

Rhonda Williams

By Rhonda Williams

There are lofty causes and every day causes.

Elizabeth Warren, the U.S. Senator from Massachusetts stated in a recent Time magazine article, “Because of our Constitution, senseless discrimination cannot survive when it is brought out of the darkness. And it is because of the tireless work of jurists, lawyers, husbands like Jim Obergefell, and countless other LGBT Americans who stepped forward to speak out, that our nation will no longer look away from what our Constitution requires.”

Yes, a lofty victory we can all celebrate. We are the “T” part of LGBT and must stand and make sure we are recognized in lofty causes, as our turn comes up. There are those working for us that deserve our support. One of these is Mara Keisling, executive director of the National Center for Transgender Equality. NCTE is a social justice organization devoted to ending discrimination and violence against transgender people through education and advocacy on national issues of importance to transgender people. NCTE facilitates a strong and clear voice for transgender equality. Go to their website. Read. Support!

However, some causes may not seem so lofty, but you as an individual can still make a difference. Stana takes every opportunity to do outreach as I have done in the past, speaking before college and school groups. The questions are amazing and seeing the light of understanding coming on, is rewarding. This is a one-on-one opportunity and makes a difference.

Palm Beach County had a very unfortunate homicide take place in in 2012. I will quote from the most recent Palm Beach Post article on the incident: “A Palm Beach County jury on Thursday acquitted Luis Rijo De Los Santos in the 2012 attempted murder of a cross-dressed prostitute but was unable to reach a verdict in a related shooting where he killed another cross dresser and injured a third. The jury’s inability to decide unanimously on the other three charges after more than 50 hours of deliberations forced Circuit Judge Glenn Kelley to declare a mistrial for that part of the case.”

Very unfortunate at many levels. Let us hope for a retrial and justice prevailing.

My reason for bringing this is up is to applaud the Palm Beach Post staff writer Daphne Duret's correct terminology. How did this happen?

In all articles prior to May of this year, the victims were referred to as “transvestite prostitutes.” As we all well know, this is a socially loaded expression. After reading, several articles referring to the three victims this way, I decided to write to the newspaper.

The e-mail opened this way, “What were you thinking? Why did you use the term transvestite? Did you not realize that 'transvestite' or the short version 'tranny' is as offensive to the gender community as the N-word? Why not just call the accused Mr. Rijo De Los Santos, ‘a N... man’? That is how offensive I see the term 'transvestite' and it all but suggests that the transgender prostitutes deserved what they got. What difference did it make how they were dressed? A murder happened.”

The next articles used the better expressions “cross-dressed.” All previous articles were changed. Ms. Duret remarked back to me in an e-mail, “After I got your first email it sparked a 15 minute conversation in the newsroom.”

Senator Warren continued, “As a nation, we see now that discrimination heaped (upon) LGBT Americans violates protections laid out in the Constitution. We see it because countless Americans have stepped forward to make themselves seen and to expose ugly discrimination for what it is: a denial of liberty and equality for our fellow citizens.”

My point here is that a well-positioned letter, e-mail, conversation, and outreach opportunity can make a big difference. We can each do our part. Lofty causes and every day causes – individual actions – all victories to celebrate!

Wearing Lulu

Kira Sadovaya, male model

Womanless Beauty Pageant Theory

By Starla

Long time Femulate readers will recall regular contributor Starla, who perused online high school yearbooks and clipped any womanless events she found memorialized in those volumes. (You can view her collection of clips here.) 

Starla is back with her theory regarding the reasoning for the existence and popularity of womanless beauty pageants in the Deep South.

Those of you who have followed Stana’s blog for any length of time know that she shares my obsession with “civilian” womanless beauty pageants. It has been fascinating for me to seek out and discover many of these increasingly elaborate events as they have evolved over the last few years.

What has fascinated and intrigued me is that in recent years, the vast majority of the most elaborate and “realistic” pageants (in which the goal is to faithfully mimic girls and not to make fun of them with grotesque parodies), especially at the high school and middle school levels (and even occasionally elementary school), tend to take place in just two states: Alabama and Mississippi.

Yes, in two of the most religious and conservative states in the union, where gays and trans people encounter hostility and harsh judgment, people seem willing and eager to parade their tween and teen sons on a stage in up-to-date gowns, excellent wigs or natural hairstyles, perfect makeup, and high heels, and revel in the event.

Yet the cruel irony is that if any of those same young boys came home one day and announced that they were trans and want to actually become girls, those same parents would probably be horrified!

From a purely geographic standpoint, it’s not hard to imagine this phenomenon being concentrated in certain areas. After all, it's not unusual for any school fundraising or spirit building event to spread from school to nearby school. In this case, it’s also telling that while womanless pageants are held throughout the South, the few really top-notch and realistic events outside of Alabama and Mississippi tend to take place in border areas adjacent to those states. A good example is the annual pageant held at Ernest Ward Middle School, which is in the extreme northwest panhandle of Florida, just a few miles from the Alabama border. (Here in Florida, we tend to say that culturally, everything north of Gainesville is really Georgia and everything west of Tallahassee is really Alabama!)

The degree of attention to detail and realism in some of these pageants is remarkable. One recently discovered Mississippi event (in Kozciusko) had a dress shop owner bragging on her Facebook page that she had supplied dresses to four of the young male entrants in a local pageant (including her own 14-year-old son who, she proudly announced, had won the pageant). No thrift shop bargains or hand-me-downs – these were current fashions.

In many womanless events elsewhere, footwear tends to be male shoes, flip-flops, or bare feet. In these Deep South pageants, the boys almost uniformly wear stylish high heels and, judging from the ease with which they walk in them, they have practiced in them for some time. We’re talking about 3-to-4 inch heels on some of these! How many 12 to 16-year-old boys do you know who can walk gracefully in heels?

Makeup is done lavishly and professionally – one tween boy in an Alabama pageant looked like he had gotten a full M•A•C makeover. Nails are almost always painted – some even wear fake nails. A few of the pictures I’ve found show boys in open-toed shoes and it is apparent that their toenails have also been nicely painted. (This is the sort of obsessive detail that most audience members wouldn’t even be able to see from their vantage point.) 

The outfits are nicely accessorized with earrings, necklaces, bracelets, even rings. Not grandma’s old junk jewelry – stuff that would look right at home on any female pageant contestant.

And the parents – these same parents who trash Caitlyn Jenner on their Twitter feeds or fight to keep transgender students from using gender-appropriate bathrooms (if they allow trans kids at all in their schools), or encourage county clerks to ignore the SCOTUS ruling and refuse marriage licenses to gay couples, nevertheless revel proudly (and often, not ironically or jokingly) in their son winning or placing high in a womanless event. They will brag on how pretty their son looked and how they looked totally feminine. While simultaneously, their Facebook accounts feature hunting trips, NASCAR, scripture quotations, and proud, defiant and conspicuous display of the rebel flag.  

What’s going on here? 

Well, maybe they truly see no irony. For them, dressing in drag for a womanless pageant is a fun frolic, a tradition, an innocent pastime having no relation to those heathen LGBT folks. It’s even a sort of rite of passage – I’ve seen more than one parent or grandparent congratulate their young’un on his “first” womanless pageant. (Implying that there will be more to come.)

But the lengths to which they take these things! I’ve corresponded with a fellow womanless beauty pageant enthusiast who has even attended some of these events and talked to some of the parents. Believe it or not, in the most extreme examples, they have worked for weeks on finding the perfect dress, experimenting with makeup, and drilling their son in pageant deportment. This is not something they throw together two days before the event – this is serious business to many!

I strongly suspect that many of the mothers who go all-out for these events are established “pageant Moms” who have daughters who compete. Then when it’s Johnny’s turn to be “prettied up,” they just apply the same level of intensity and attention to detail to their boys as they do to their girls. 

Or they may be “wannabes” – I’ve noted a few cases in which a Mom freely admitted that they had no daughters and despaired of ever having the fun of preparing their kin for a pageant – until their son’s school held such an event and they were able to lavish their machinations on him! Beauty pageants, especially child pageants are big in the Deep South – it should perhaps not be surprising that much of this enthusiasm and borderline fanaticism spills over into the womanless pageant world.

As for the realism of the femulations, that, too, may be explainable. 

Traditionally, the South has viewed their girls and women with an inordinate degree of chivalry, seeing them as precious gems to be honored and celebrated for their femininity. To lampoon girls in a womanless pageant with an exaggerated and homely burlesque of the “fairer sex” would be anathema to them. If their boys are going to portray girls for an evening, they will do so in a way that honors and celebrates their beauty and special status.

What about the young men and boys who don female garb for these events? Well, in the region in question, they seem to enjoy the experience for the most part. This doesn’t necessarily signify anything profound. Dressing up for a womanless pageant is not going to turn a boy trans, though it may help to confirm and solidify an existing propensity or desire to crossdress in someone who’s already wired that way and provides a safe and fun way to indulge those stirrings in a socially acceptable context.

However one theorizes about this phenomenon, it is a fascinating window on the unique and contradictory culture of Dixie!

Wearing Nine West

Michel Epalza Betancourt

The Personal Politics of Public Bathrooms

Like magic, Ann Friedman's article from The Cut, "The Personal Politics of Public Bathrooms," appeared the day after I published my "Sit to Pee" post. It is a good read and here are some quotes from the article to entice you to read it.

"...anti-trans activists, who have deliberately made bathrooms a battleground by stoking wholly irrational fears about people who express their gender differently. They have deftly flipped the script, portraying gender-conforming women as the ones who are most at-risk, when in fact the opposite is true."

"...even if someone is perceived to be using the “wrong” bathroom, police have no basis for questioning them or asking for ID, according to the Sylvia Rivera Law Project. Truly, none of us have a basis for questioning the gender of someone else who’s minding their own business in the stall or at the sink next to us."

Wearing Sharagano.

Fran Heuser, male model

Happy Independence Day!

Wearing Madeleine.

Dave's swimsuit.