Girl-Time in Kindergarten

I attended a public co-ed grammar school starting in kindergarten in the fall of 1956. My kindergarten class had two female teachers ― one middle-aged and one twenty-something.

For play time, the class of about 30 students was divided into five unisex groups. Each group took turns each day playing in different play areas: sandbox, toy blocks, art, play house, etc.

When it was my group's turn to play house, us boys played at being mommies, never daddies.

Some the male mommies donned frilly aprons and "cooked" in the play kitchen, while other male mommies tended to the babies ― bottle-feeding Betsy Wetsy dolls and changing their diapers after they wet. When Betsy was dry, male mommies could push their babies around the classroom in doll carriages.

In addition to the frilly aprons, there was a toy box containing pocketbooks, high heels, lady’s hats and adult-sized dresses. There were not enough items to completely outfit each mommy, so we would select just an item or two for our femulations. (I usually tried to get a pocketbook and a pair of heels.)

None of the male mommies, at least in my group, rebelled at being feminized and some of us really got into it by affecting “female” characteristics, such as speaking in a higher pitch and using female mannerisms.

Initially, I felt embarrassed playing a mommy, but it did not seem to bother the other boys, so I played along like a girl with the rest of the boys. 

And so it goes.

 

Wearing J.O.A.

 

 

 

Kosima, an early 20th Century professional femulator.

Dogs

I was a late bloomer when it came to dogs.

My mother had a dog when she was single, but she would not let her daughters have dogs, so I never experienced the joys of a dog's companionship as a child. However, I made up for it as an adult, first with my daughters' dearly departed dog and now with my own dog.

It is interesting how the dogs get/got along with me en femme.

My daughter's dog was my best buddy and acted the same with me no matter how I was dressed. I figure that he did not notice the difference or did not care.

My own dog notices the difference.

Whereas she is my best friend when I am in boy mode, she will have nothing to do with me in girl mode.

Most of the time, she is my shadow and follows me wherever I go. For example, she lays on the bed watching me when I get dressed in the morning or when I change clothes after work. If I dress in boy mode, she sticks around and waits for me to finish, however, if I dress in girl mode, she gets out of Dodge as soon as she senses that I am dressing pretty.

She is very intelligent and I figure that when she realizes I am dressing in girl mode, she knows I am going out without her, so she looks for someone else for companionship.

On the other hand, our cats do not give a damn!

 

 

 

Wearing French Connection.

 

 

 

Early 20th Century professional femulator Fritz Maxfeld.

Uncovered

 

 

 

 

Wearing Madeleine.

 

 

 

Singer Alex Velea performing on Romanian television’s
Te Cunosc De Undeva! (Your Face Sounds Familiar).

Zoé’s Favorite Photo (of Zoé!)

So, Stana, I send you this photo. I chose the photo because of the flowers, which make it one of my favorites. And it reminds me of a very nice sunny day too :-) I do like flowers, but for some reasons, I have very few photos like this one. Once again, thanks a lot for your website. I really enjoy it a lot...... Best regards from Paris, Zoé In response to my open invitation to send your favorite photo along with the story behind it and the reason it is your favorite photo, I received a lot of photos and stories that I am posting in the the order I received them. My invitation still stands, so don't be shy, send me your fave foto!

 

 

 

Wearing La Redoute.

 

 

 

Actor Trent Dawson femulates on television’s As the World Turns (2009).

Maria’s Favorite Photo (of Maria!)

Please find attached my favorite femulation picture of myself. It was taken when I attended the Sparkle event held in Manchester, England in 2009.

It was the first time that I had been out dressed in public. And I was accepted for how I presented. I was accepted as a woman.

Regards,

Maria Ski

In response to my open invitation to send your favorite photo along with the story behind it and the reason it is your favorite photo, I received a lot of photos and stories that I am posting in the the order I received them. My invitation still stands, so don't be shy, send me your fave foto!

 

 

 

Wearing Diane von Furstenberg.

 

 

 

Michael Strahan femulates Oprah Winfrey on television’s Live! With Kelly and Michael.

Femulating in USA’s Queerest City

If you have been reading this blog for awhile, you know that every May I drive to Dayton, Ohio to attend Hamvention, the biggest ham radio convention in the world. And I do the whole trip en femme. My female presentation on these trips has never been an issue. Turns out that The Advocate has just named Dayton as the queerest city in the USA  (among cities with populations of 100,000 or more). Maybe that has something to do with my successful female presentation there ― maybe not. When I attend Hamvention, I spend most of my time mingling with hams, rather than the local population. Those hams come from all over the world, not just the queerest city in the USA, yet I have never had a problem. So go figure!

Dayton 2009

 

 

 

Wearing Carven (dress) and Aquazzura (shoes).

 

 

 

Artur Chamski femulates Małgorzata Walewska on Polish television’s
Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo (Your Face Sounds Familiar).

“Crossdressing Successfully in the Real World”

I will be presenting "Crossdressing Successfully in the Real World" at two venues this spring. The first will be at True Colors Conference at the University of Connecticut in Storrs, Connecticut on Friday, March 20. The second will be at Transgender Lives Conference at the University of Connecticut Health Center in Farmington, Connecticut on Saturday, April 25. Miss Jan Brown will be co-presenting with me at that venue. I have presented at the first conference five times; the second conference will be a new venue for me. True Colors Conference is intended for GLBT youth and their supporters, so the majority its presentations and workshops are not trans-related (and are more youth-oriented). Whereas Transgender Lives Conference is more adult-oriented and most, if not all of its presentations and workshops are trans-related.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A crossdressed baseball game in 1951

Age Reassignment Surgery

By Rhonda Williams

I have a confession to make. After all the years insisting that I was “no-op” and would likely never have surgery I have succumb to the inevitable. One day I looked in the mirror and said, “It is now, or never.” How can I face tomorrow knowing that another person wants to have her story told? A younger looking version of the person I had become.

As I looked into the mirror, I saw an old person; my beloved grandfather. Yes, the surgery I had was not GRS, but facial feminization surgery (FFS). To be technically correct, I had typical (female) fresh face surgery. Blessed with somewhat feminine features, the years have taken their toll. I hated what had happened to my lower face, neck and jowls. No amount of contouring makeup was ever going to hide what time plus gravity had accomplished. I just did not feel as old as I looked.

Some of you may remember me from the previous posts of “A Working Woman” and “Through the Glass Ceiling In Reverse.” Therefore, there was still an abundance of opportunity to be out as Rhonda professionally and socially. However, after getting ready for an event, early last fall, I looked and thought to myself, “This is not working.” Fortunately, because of a commitment, staying home was not an option. I know all of us have been there.

My due diligence started a few years back. Plastic surgeons do provide free consultation and estimates so I visited several. Always as my feminine self, so there would be no question as to my preferred outcome. Although all were friendly and professional from a business prospective, we can always perceive when there is a lack of either acceptance or downright prejudice. My search continued and just recently, a wonderful and accepting surgeon relocated to my area. He actually mentioned FFS on his web page, so I knew he would be knowledgeable about our community.

Not only was he accepting, but also had studied and worked in the Boston area with one of the best FFS doctors/experts available. He helped me decide what would be best for a younger look and suggested subtle and reasonable options. His male and female “before and after photos” were remarkable. I committed. It has been about three months and could not be more pleased with the outcome ― a fresh look.

I question myself now as to why I waited so long. Being 66, I did think that it was too late to do anything. I was wrong. I like to describe my procedures as “age reassignment surgery.” There was a younger person inside that needed validation.

We baby boomers are rewriting the book as we have done all along. I am living proof that “60 can be the new 40.” Do feel free to ask me questions as to cost, recovery and realistic expectations. My e-mail address is rhondawilliams at bellsouth.net.

If you really want more information, I will be in the Boston area next week at the First Event trans conference. My surgeon, Dr. Vartan Mardirossian, has a booth and I will be there Thursday thru Saturday along with another of his success patients. Also on Friday afternoon, at 1 PM, he is presenting a seminar on FFS to educate and highlight his work. Private consultations will be available and are free. We hope to see you.

See: floridaffs.com ― Yes, I am on the left in the before and after photos.

 

 

 

Wearing Light in the Box.

 

 

 

Vladimir Luxuria

It’s complicated

Ann Onamus left the following comment to yesterday's post:

I was wondering if you are considering going full time as a woman this year? You love to shop, educate, go to meetings etc and talk about it on the website. I'm sure the people who follow you on this site would like to know as well as myself.

Dear Ann,

I am a woman full time; I just don't dress as a woman full-time. I would prefer to dress as a woman full-time, but it's complicated.

In deference to my spouse, I dress as a male at home and when I am out with the family. (My spouse married a male and I am committed to being a male for her no matter how feminine that male may be.)

When I am out alone, I usually dress as a female.

My employer made it clear that I can dress as a female at work, but I have not discussed this with my spouse yet. If I make any progress toward dressing full-time this year, it will be on the work front.

My co-workers reaction to dressing as a woman at work would probably be a non-issue. I have dressed as a woman at work on five occasions: Halloweens 2000, 2003, and 2012-14 (see photo above).

The first few times (2000, 2003, 2012) created quite a stir. No one complained, but everyone wanted to see the new girl at work. The last two times (2013, 2014), except for new hires, few of my co-workers showed much interest in how I was dressed.

"Oh, is he dressed as a woman again? What else is new?"

Dressing as a woman at work full-time rather than just Halloween may raise a few eyebrows, but as my boss said when I told her I was trans, "I'm not surprised." And it will probably not surprise my other co-workers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A mid-1950s femulator.

Shopped ‘Til She Dropped

I never get tired of shopping for women’s clothing en femme. Browsing through the racks and finding a half-dozen outfits to take to the changing room is just as much fun today as it was when I would browse through my mother’s closet and find outfits to try on in front of her full-length mirror.

Just writing about shopping motivates me to take a day off this week to go shopping en femme. After all I do need something new to wear when I go to First Event (as if I don’t already have a half-dozen dresses hanging in my closet that still have their price tags attached).

Someday my tombstone will read, “Shopped ‘Til She Dropped.”

Anyway…

“How can someone who is transgender shop for clothes in the women's clothing department/stores?” is a question that Quora readers answered recently. The readers’ responses offered some good advice (read it here), but I wanted to add some of my own advice.

• If a store associate is available when going to the changing room to try on your finds, play dumb and ask where the changing rooms are located. I do this whenever possible for insurance purposes, that is, if somebody complains about a dude in the lady’s dressing room, the dude can say that’s where the store associate told me to go.
• Take as many outfits as possible to try on when you go to the changing room. Some stores limit the number you can take in, some don’t, but in any case, go for the max in order to minimize the number of times you have to strip off your street clothes.
• Shop at smaller women’s clothing stores rather than big department stores. You won’t get a lot of hands-on assistance in large department stores, however, you usually will get assistance in smaller women’s clothing stores. For example, when you are ready to try on your finds, an associate will “start” a dressing room for you (your very own queendom) and sometimes they will even put a sign on the door reserving that room for you with your femme name emblazoned on the sign. If something is the wrong size, the associate will fetch another size to try on saving you the trouble of getting back into your street clothes to do the fetching yourself. Savvy associates will size you up and recommend clothing for you to try on (the polka dot dress I wore on my Christmas card was an associate’s recommendation; she even suggested accessorizing with red heels and a red bag, which I did).
• Speaking of street clothes, wear an outfit that you can strip off and put back on easily. I own a sweater dress that has a full-length zipper in front, which is perfect for quick undressing/dressing. Jumpsuits also work well.
• The associates want to sell, so if they compliment you on what you try on, take the compliment with a grain of salt. If you go shopping with a friend, your friend’s compliments may not be any more valuable than the store associate’s because your friend may not want to hurt your feelings. So here is a way I get an independent appraisal of what I am trying on… I step out of the dressing room on the pretense of viewing myself in the full-length mirrors usually hung throughout the store. My goal is for another customer to see me while I am doing this. If they gush over what I am wearing, it is a bingo! Whenever I have done this, other customers always check me out while I am checking me out and if they like what they see, they let me know.
• For a quick self-appraisal, take a selfie or have an associate take your photo. The difference between what you “see” in a mirror and what you “see” in a photo is surprising ― trust the photo, not the mirror.

Shopping for women’s clothing is almost as much fun as wearing women’s clothing! So go girls and have some fun.

 

 

 

Wearing Dior.

 

 

 

Singer Kuba Molęda femulates Margaret on Polish television’s Twoja Twarz Brzmi
Znajomo (Your Face Sounds Familiar). The must-see video of this femulation is here.