The Eyes Have It

After seeing my visage in yesterday's post here, Patio asked me how I do my eyes.

I am happy to share my makeup regime, so here it is eye-wise.

First things first: I cleanse my face and apply moisturizer.

Now concentrating on the eyes, here are the steps I follow:

1. I use a concealer under my eyes to hide my eye baggage.

2. I apply an eyeshadow primer on my eyelids and brow bone, that is, between my eyelids and eyebrows.

3. While the primer dries, I tend to my eyebrows plucking strays and trimming longs.

4. I use a light brown eyebrow pencil (Anastasia Perfect Brow Pencil's "Soft Brown") to outline and fill in my brows. I have been femulating Keira Knightly's eyebrows (see photo) and I think I have been successful.

5. I curl my eyelashes lashes for at least 30 seconds per eye.

6. I use a large eyeshadow brush and apply a light beige eyeshadow all over my upper eyelids and browbone.

7. I use a small eyeshdow brush and apply a dark eyeshadow (purple, brown, dark gray, etc.) along crease between eyelids and brow bone.

This is tricky to describe, but let me try.

Using the eyebrow brush, I pick up a tiny bit of dark eyeshadow on only one side of the brush. Then I bring the shadow side of the brush up to the center of the brow bone along the crease and move it towards the outer side of my eye to deposit most of the shadow on that portion of my eye.

Then I use a windshield wiper-like motion to go back and forth along the whole crease. My goal is to make the outer portion of the crease and brow bone darker than the inner portion with a smooth transition from light to dark; the wiper motion blends the shadow to create the smooth transition.

Overall, I try to use less shadow for daytime femulations and more shadow for nighttime femulations.

8. I reapply some light beige shadow just below my brows and blend it with the darker shadow below. Sometimes this will lead me to reapply the dark eyeshadow until I get it just right (or nearly so).

9. I pick up a tiny bit more of the dark eyeshadow and apply it to the outer third of the lid and use the windshield wiper motion again to blend the shadow on the lid.

10. I use a second small eyeshadow brush to pick up a tiny bit of a light eyeshadow (light beige, light gray, white, etc.) and dab the color near the center of the lid, then blend it with the dark eyeshadow already on your lid.

11. I use black eyeshadow as my eyeliner and apply it using an eyeliner brush intended for powder eyeliner. I find it less prone to error than using an eyeliner pencil or a liquid eyeliner.

I dab the tip (not the side) of the eyeliner brush in black eyeshadow and apply it to the upper eyelid as close as possible to the lash line. I start in the center of the lid and work my way out to the outer part of the lid, then I work my way in to the inner part of the lid. I go back and forth until the line is consistent (no breaks or fades) and as dark as I want it. At the outer edge of the lid, I extend the line beyond the lid, making it narrower until it comes to a point. Sometimes I give it a little curl upward, sometimes not.

12. I dab the side of the eyeliner brush and swipe it along the lower lid as close to the lash line as possible, then I use a cotton swab to smudge the line and blend it so that it is consistent.

13. I am always experimenting with different mascaras. Since I am an Avon Lady, I always try their latest mascara offerings, but for what it's worth, lately I have been using Rimmel brand mascara. I apply it once to the upper and lower lashes and let it dry. Then I use a metal lash comb to separate any lashes that are stuck together.

I always apply a second coat of mascara. Sometimes I will apply a third coat.

By the way, my eyelashes are amazingly long, so that augments the overall look of my eyes. I have been using the Avon's Anew eyelash growth serum religiously every morning for nearly two years and it has had a profound effect on the length and thickness of my eyelashes. Sorry to say that Avon discontinued the product, however, there are competitive products that may work just as well if you have sparse and/or short lashes.

After doing all the above steps, there is always some touch-up and clean-up involved. To help avoid messy clean-ups, use a brush to apply some loose face powder below your eyes. When you are done doing your eyes, simply brush away this loose powder along with any eye makeup crumbs that may have landed there.

All this sounds very complicated and I will admit that doing my eyes takes longer than doing the rest of my makeup, but I think the results are worth the effort. And the more you do it, the more quickly you will do it!

If you have any questions, I will try to answer them.

Womanly Yours,

Stana

No More Closets

I was in the closet for a very long time.

Although my interests in feminine things go back to my earliest memories, I did not take up crossdressing until I was 12-years-old. But once I began, I crossdressed at every opportunity, typically whenever I found myself alone at home.

When I was 19, I reached my tipping point and had to let Stana out of the closet. So I dressed en femme on Halloween despite the fact that I had nowhere to go.

Unlike today, where there is a Halloween event everywhere you turn, back in the late-1970s, there was not much Halloween-wise for a young adult. I had not been invited to any Halloween parties (I didn't even know of any Halloween parties) and I was too young to go to any bar that might be celebrating Halloween. So, Mom let her "daughter" borrow the car and I visited some friends and relatives to "trick 'n' treat." (How desperate is that?)

Post-Halloween, I was back in the closet honing my femulating skills while waiting for next year's Halloween party invitations. I never went out en femme to trick 'n' treat again, but I did get a few party invitations over the years.

I always attended the parties dressed as a woman, not as a woman wearing a woman's costume. Invariably, some party-goer would wonder why I wasn't wearing a costume and I would explain to their astonishment that I was in costume. Post-Halloween, I would be back in the closet again, but at least I realized that all the practice in the closet was not for naught.

Online (via Compuserve's Genderline), I discovered and joined a local support group in the early 1980s. Now, I was able to get out of the house en femme on days besides the last day of months beginning with the letter O. I attended meetings once or twice per month, always dressing at home and driving to the meeting place 25 miles away.

On occasion, the support group sponsored outings --- usually dinners at local restaurants, which sheltered us in a private room so we would not to mix with their "normal" clientele. I always attended, but being a rebel, I made a point of using the public ladies' restroom instead of the private restroom that had been assigned to us.

I wanted more and began attending trans conventions, which gave me the opportunity to have the run of a whole hotel for a long weekend en femme. 

But I realized that I was still in the closet. I just had more closet-space: in my home, in my support group's meeting places, and in trans convention hotels.

I still wanted more, so I became a little more adventurous. On my way to support group meetings, I would stop off to buy a refreshment at a convenience store or fast food joint. Amazingly, no one seemed to notice or care that I was en femme. I was passing or at least, I was accepted and that emboldened me to do more.

It took 55 years, but I finally summoned up enough courage to go out in public en femme. I decided to make that leap by going to the mall. I dressed en femme, drove to the mall, arrived just as it opened, and sat in my car for a half-hour trying to muster the courage to exit the car and walk across the parking lot to the mall entrance.

I finally pushed myself and did it and I spent the better part of day at the mall having the time of my life. Some people read me, but it was not the end of the world, and once I got a taste of the world en femme, I wanted more.

Subsequently, I picked my days and spent them en femme, shopping, dining, being entertained, enjoying the arts, etc., etc., and I loved it, doing what other women did when they were out.

It all felt so natural to me. I was always feminine. As I have written here before, I was not a female trapped in a male body, rather I was me trapped by society's expectations of what a male was supposed to be. The "problem" was that I preferred to fulfill society's expectations of what a woman was supposed to be.

Finally, I realized I was a woman, who happened to have a male body, but I was not going to let that little handicap hinder me from being the best woman I could be.

And so it goes.

Guam's Transgender Beauty Pageant

“Miss Kadenan Umatuiya was crowned Miss Guahan in the transgender beauty pageant held in Guam.

“The pageant was organised by a local arts group who used the event to raise money to go to the upcoming Pacific Arts Festival in Solomon Islands.

“Unlike other transgender pageants, it was a serious contest with a focus on indigenous culture. This pageant is about representing and preserving the indigenous Chamorro culture and promoting acceptance of transgender people.”

Read the rest of the story on the Radio Australia website and at Guampdn.com, which was the source of the photo above.

The Fashion Show

Glenn Koetznr photo for
TheRainbowTimesNews.com

Friday night, I was a model in a fashion show, which was a fundraiser for the Connecticut TransAdvocacy Coalition (CTAC).

There were five models, four male-to-female and one female-to-male transgenders. We each modeled two outfits, "business" and "casual" wear.

You can see the outfits I wore in the photos in this and my previous blog posts. You can see the outfits everyone wore here.

 I received compliments on both outfits. Some people appreciated the purple skirt-suit for its vintageness and other people wanted to know where I bought the patterned tights (the answer: Avon). The female-to-male trans model paid me the highest compliment; he was convinced that I was a post-op transexual.

I modeled in the same show four years ago in the same venue and the contrast between the two shows could not be greater. In 2007, the bar at Tommy's Restaurant was packed with people. It was so crowded that it was difficult to wade through the crowd to model our outfits In 2011, the crowd was thin. I estimate that there were only 50 to 75 people in the audience, which was a far cry from the 2007 crowd.

The explanation I heard for the meager attendance was a lack of advertising. Whatever the reason, it was a little disappointing, but the show went on despite the small crowd and I had a wonderful time modeling and schmoozing with new and old friends.

Last Night

I had a fab time modeling at the fashion show last night. I don't have time to write much about it now, but my good friend Diana (of Diana's Little Corner in the Nutmeg State fame) posted a link in yesterday's comments pointing to a slew of photos from yesterday's event taken by Glenn Koetzner.

Here is the link. Enjoy!

Transgender Fashion Show Tonight

If you are in the area of central Connecticut tonight, I invite you to the transgender fashion show at Tommy's Restaurant in Middletown at 7 PM. The event is a fundraiser for the Connecticut TransAdvocacy Coalition; admission is $10.

I will be modeling in the show, but I am not sure what I will be modeling. My "business" outfit is picked out and ready to wear, but I am unsure about my "casual" outfit.

The cocktail dress I wanted to wear arrived in the mail yesterday. I had another engagement after work last night, so I only had time to quickly slip the dress on without my shapewear and it seemed just a wee bit too small.

When I get home today, I will try again wearing shapewear and maybe it will fit. The dress is gorgeous, so I am hoping that will do the trick. If not, I will resort to Plan B and wear my other new dress from Ideeli.

I am taking a half-day off from work this afternoon to get ready for the show. I want to look my best and that takes time especially since both "casual" dresses show more skin than I've shown in awhile, which means some extra hair removal will be necessary.

But it’s worth it... it's all for a good cause and it will make me feel that much more womanly.

I Erred

I arrived at work yesterday and noticed that the seam on one of my walkers was broken exposing my sock-covered toes.

Since the weather was wet, I decided that I needed a new pair of walkers as soon as possible. (I hate wearing wet socks, don't you?)

Payless is having a BOGO sale, that is, buy one pair of shoes and get a second pair at half price. So, I decided to go to Payless during lunch, replace my broken walkers and buy something in the women's aisles of the store.

Before I went to Payless, I swapped my socks for a pair of knee-highs so when I tried on women's shoes, I would get a better idea how they fit.

I arrived at Payless and perused my size in the women's section and found absolutely nothing of interest. I did find walkers in my size in the men's aisle and I took advantage of the sale and both two pairs.

Back at work, I swapped my knee-high for my socks and swapped my broken walkers for a new pair. Whereas the walkers fit comfortably when I tried them on in the store wearing knee-highs, they were uncomfortably tight wearing socks.

So I go back to Payless today wearing socks.

Wednesday Wanderings

Your Halloween Photos

Thank you all who sent me your femulating Halloween photos for display in THE FEMULATED slot during the month of October. There is room for more, so send me yours if you haven't already.

YouTube

I had a wrestling match with YouTube last night and I lost as you can see by the broken video in the AND HER, TOO slot. I will attempt to fix it as soon as I can.

New Cocktail Dress

Looks like I will get my new cocktail dress in time to model at the fashion show on Friday, that is, assuming it fits. Ideeli shipped it yesterday and according to the UPS tracker, it arrived at the local UPS facility this morning, so I will probably get it tomorrow.

Back to Reality

I was on vacation last week. Stayed up late most nights and slept in late most mornings.

So getting up at 5:30 AM Monday morning was difficult. To make matters worse, I now find Orion peeking through the bathroom skylight instead of rays from Mr. Sun.

Day Three of reality and I am still not acclimated to my normal schedule!

Halloween and The Femulated

Twenty-six days until Halloween and my intention is to feature a femulator in Halloween garb in THE FEMULATED: slot of this blog through the 31st of the month.

I assure you I have an adequate number of images to complete the task, but I would love to use Femulate reader Halloween images in THE FEMULATED: slot instead of the images of strangers. So if you are so inclined, send me a femulating image of you from a Halloween past and I will use it before the month is over.

By the way, there have been no announcements at work yet concerning any Halloween doings on the job. It is probably too early; most announcements of that sort arrive in our mailboxes two weeks or so before the event, so there is still time for that. Nevertheless, I plan to work en femme on Halloween whether anything is doing or not. 

Dress-Up Friday

Friday evening, I dress up to model a couple of outfits in a transgender fashion show for the benefit of the Connecticut TransAdvocacy Coalition (CTAC).

The event starts at 7 PM at Tommy’s Restaurant (825 Saybrook Road, Middletown, CT 06457), just off Route 9 Exit 11. Admission is $10 at the door; you must be 21 or older to attend.

The dress I planned to model in the casual wear portion of the show has not arrived from Ideeli yet, so I may have to resort to Plan B and model the dress I previously received from Ideeli. But the week is young and if they ship in a day or two, I should receive the dress by show time.

If you are in the area, I hope you will consider attending the show. The venue is very diverse and you will have no issues fitting in and being accepted by the other attendees, so come on down!

Girlette Trans Fusion

At the Movies

Thora Birch in Ghost World

I am a big film fan (maybe too big). I have over 700 films on DVD and probably 100 or more films on videotapes that I have not upgraded to DVD yet.

Synecdoche, New York is one film I have on DVD. I added it to my collection because it looked like an unusual film and it starred one of my favorite actors, Philip Seymour Hoffman.

The film was weird and I was disappointed. I assumed I would never watch the DVD again. That is, until I received an e-mail from Gwen today.

Gwen wrote, "I saw this film yesterday and it was really weird in many ways.  The strangest being that at the end of the film, the main character, a man, takes on the persona of a woman, called Ellen.  She's a cleaning lady, so he cleans.  And his role is taken by a woman.  No male to female cross dressing involved.  But there's a definite gender bluring going on, that you don't often see in mainstream films."

I totally missed it. My guess is that the film was so weird that I tuned out mentally by the time the transgender scene(s) occurred. So, I guess I will be watching Synecdoche, New York again real soon now.

A film I can watch again and again is Ghost World, which I happened to catch on the dish last night. It is another unusual film (based on a comic book) and stars another of my favorite actors, Steve Buscemi. It also includes a great performance by Thora Birch, who plays the female lead in the film.

There is nothing transgender in the film, but it is definitely worth watching if you have never seen it.

Blurring

Beauty expert, Louis Licari, wrote about blurring on Huffington Post... not gender blurring, but age blurring. It is an interesting blog post and includes tips on how you too can blur your age and look "young" despite how many birthdays you have celebrated (or not).

You can read Mr. Licari's post here. Enjoy!

Viewing "And Her, Too" in Full Screen Mode

Yesterday, I added the following note below the And Her, Too image: (Viewing in Full Screen mode is best!)

The Full Screen mode provides a big enhancement to the video. It is like the difference between night and day --- I highly recommend it.

To enter the Full Screen mode, click on the button (image above) in the lower left corner of the And Her, Too window.

To exit the Full Screen mode, press the Escape key (ESC) on your computer's keyboard.

Big Delivery

Saw the mailman make a delivery, so I took a break from my housework to see what he brought.

Opened the mailbox and among the usual collection of junk mail was a thick catalog. It looked about the size of the old Sears catalogs, but I knew it was not from Sears and I could not imagine what it was.

I pulled the hefty book out of the mailbox to discover that it is the September issue of Vogue --- 758 pages of fall fashionista heaven.

I can't wait to finish my housework so I can peruse it!

They Ban Books, Don't They?

"The week of Sept 24 - Oct 1 is Banned Books Week, a time when libraries, schools, and bookstores celebrate our First Amendment freedom to read while drawing attention to the harms that censorship does to our society and our individual freedoms," so wrote Molly Raphael in today's edition of HuffPost.

"...far more often than we may realize, individuals and groups have sought to restrict access to library books they believed were objectionable on religious, moral, or political grounds, thereby restricting the rights of every reader in their community. For example, this summer the Republic (Mo.) school board voted to remove Kurt Vonnegut's Slaughterhouse-Five and Sarah Ockler's Twenty Boy Summer from the school library as a result of a complaint that the book 'teaches principles contrary to Biblical morality and truth.'

You can read the entire article here.

And remember, after they ban books, people (like us) are next.

Femulating at the Atlanta Cotillion Ball

"Annually, a group of gentlemen from the Atlanta gay community participate as 'debutantes' in a unique fundraising concept to benefit HIV/AIDS charities.  Each participant is given a financial goal; how they reach and, almost always, exceed that goal depends on their creativity, resources and passion for helping those affected by HIV/AIDS.  Since 2002 the Atlanta Cotillion has not only donated over $750,000, but has also become one of the single largest donors of unrestricted funds to AID Atlanta, the largest AIDS service organization in the southeast.

"After months of creative individual fundraising efforts, the Atlanta Cotillion social season culminates in the lively and entertaining Atlanta Cotillion Ball. In keeping to tradition the escorted debutantes are presented on stage to celebrate their fundraising successes.  As the highlight of the evening, the debutante who has raised the most funds is crowned Queen of the Atlanta Cotillion Ball."

The dress requirements for the event are interesting to say the least.

"Women’s formal evening attire is required for invited guests who have made donations of $75 or more (regardless of gender or sexual orientation). Guests who have made donations of $150 or more may attend in formal evening attire (Black Tie). Please note that  no table may have more than five guests in Black Tie.

"Those attending in formal female attire are required to be free of visible facial or body hair and appropriately dressed for a formal event. Thank you for adhering to these dress requirements, which will be strictly enforced for admittance."

Sounds like my kind of place.

Photos from the 2009 and 2010 Balls are on flickr here and here. The femulations are fabulous!

Thank-you Aunty Marlena for this fine femulation find.

She Gets It

My wife and I seldom discuss my transgender. I never bring up the subject because whenever I attempted to do so in the past, my wife said she knew enough and did not want to discuss it further.

Today, she mentioned that she was tired of people giving Chaz Bono a hard time. She said he was born that way; no one would choose the hard way of life of a transgender voluntarily, so leave him be.

Then she said, "Just like you were born that way."

I guess that means she gets it.

Anybody Else See This ?

Wednesday evening, I was sitting in front of the television while I was answering e-mails on my computer. I was not paying close attention to the television, which I think was tuned to ABC.

An advertisement came on for a new television show, a situation comedy. The ad showed a male and female in conversation. The female said something (sarcastic?) about the male's clothing choice. Next thing you know, the male was wearing a dress, and the female said something sarcastic about him wearing a dress.

It happened so fast that I missed the name of the show and I am not sure what I really saw.

Anybody else see this? Or was it just my 'magination?

Help Femulating

Since most us played on the other team most of our lives, femulating can be challenging. We try to be mature women, yet we are still learning the basics that young women take for granted.

Personally, I willingly accept all the help I can get. One source of help I find very useful is Ginger Burr, an image consultant, who I had the pleasure of meeting last fall. Ginger runs Total Image Consultants, an image consultant business  in the Boston area and has both cis and transgender women as clients.

Ginger also has an online presence. She writes a blog and sends out sage advice via e-mail.

Today her blog asks "Do You Have a One-Dimensional Wardrobe?"

Ginger writes, "Here’s something to ponder: There’s a fine line between ‘knowing’ yourself (for instance, feeling genuinely confident that harem pants are not for you) and ‘limiting’ yourself, and your style when it’s not necessary.

"Many women pigeon hole themselves into a prescribed way of dressing and thereby limit their options and often squelch their sense of delight. Their wardrobe becomes functional and one-dimensional — devoid of any personal style and their boredom level escalates."

I highly recommend reading the rest of the article; you can find it here.

You can also subscribe to Ginger’s e-mails here.

And may your weekend be femulating!