So Now I'm Her Secretary

My Weekend

My health was up and down all week long last week. Home Friday after work and whatever I had notched it up a lot and I felt terrible; flu-like symptoms, but not quite the flu.

I felt terrible all day Saturday.

I feel a lot better today; not 100%, but a big improvement over Friday and Saturday.

I was not online much during the past two days, so I have some catching up to do.

Standby for the forthcoming catch-up.

Womanless Pageant Next Door!

Is there anything as rare as a womanless pageant north of the Mason-Dixon Line?

That rare event will actually take place a mere 20 miles from home: at the Warner Theater in Torrington, CT on April 27.

Shannon clued me in about the event and I found this related article.

Dubbed the "Woah-Man Beauty Pageant," it is a fund-raiser for a local food bank with 43 local "girls" competing for the crown. A bridal shop will provide the dresses and gowns and hair salons will provide wigs and makeup.

I hope this is a trend and there will be more womanless pageants in this neck of the woods; maybe one that is so local that I will be able to participate.

High Heel Hangover

6 Steps to Getting Back on Your Feet Fast

By Neal M. Blitz, D.P.M., F.A.C.F.A.S., Chief of Foot Surgery and Associate Chairman of Orthopaedics, Bronx-Lebanon Hospital in New York

"It is no secret that high heels are 'bad' for your feet and over time they can cause all sorts of foot problems, but it's the day after wearing high heels that women can have major foot pain or discomfort. This day-after foot pain from wearing high heels is the called the 'High Heel Hangover'."

Read the rest of the story here on The Huffington Post.

Wednesday Washout

I have been wrestling with a cold for a few days and when I awoke this morning, I felt worse.

After contemplating my situation for about an hour, I decided that I would not have much fun out en femme the way I was feeling, so I cancelled my plans and spent the day in boring boy mode.

Wednesday Wanderings

I'm out en femme all-day Wednesday.

I was not sure I'd be able to do it, but I managed to knock off all my hot projects at work and can get away for a weekday.

I plan to go shopping to buy a couple of new outfits for my 4-day excursion en femme in May. I will be working a booth at a convention for two of those days and want to look professional.

The woman who work the other booths at that convention are all over the spectrum in the fashion department. There are a few "booth babes" in revealing tops, short shorts or short skirts, and sky-high heels, but the majority of booth women dress more casually wearing slacks or skirts and tops.

I prefer to dress somewhere in between, that is, more professional than the casual majority, but not too professional as to make people wonder what my profession may be (if you know what I mean).

So I will visit the mall tomorrow.

In the past, I've bought some nice outfits at JCPenney, but my most recent shopping trips there have been disappointing. Hopefully, I will have better luck tomorrow.

After the mall, if it is not too late and I am not too tired, I may go to the casino for an hour or two, then back home before the sun sets.

Rubbeldiekatz

While searching the Internet for new photos of Matthias Schweighöfers in the film Rubbeldiekatz, I discovered (1) the photo accompanying today's blog post and (2) a description of the film's plot that differs slightly from the plot I read about back in January.

Previously dubbed a German version of the film Tootsie, I found this plot description on KillerMovies:

"Based on a screenplay by Anika Decker (Rabbit Without Ears), the comedy, previously known as Woman in Love, but now carrying the working title of Rubbeldiekatz, follows an unsuccessful actor whose life takes a dramatic turn when he is mistakenly cast as a woman in a big Hollywood pic."

That differs from the plot of Tootsie in which an unemployed actor dresses as a woman in order to find work and lands the part in a daytime television soap opera.

I know the plots are similar, but for an anal retentive purest like me, I think they differ enough to mention.

Monumental Monday

Height is the subject of this first day of the work week with five additions to my Famous Females of Height List.

5'8" – Abbie Cornish – actress – film A Good Year

5'8" – Amber Heard (photo right) – actress – television Playboy

5'9" – Madison Riley – actress – film Grown Ups

6'0" – Antonia Okonma – actress – television (UK)

6'0" – Beth Orton – singer

The last two are from Meg of Call Me Meg fame… thank you, Girlfriend.

The Color Purple

I love the color purple.

The dress I wore my first time out en femme was purple and I have owned many purple outfits over the years. I believe it is a good color for me; in my opinion, I look good in my photos when I wear purple.

Take it from this fashionista: When you find a color that suits you, don't mess with success. Instead, add it to your wardrobe and put together outfits around that color.

While I was looking for something else on my computer this morning, I found the accompanying photo. I don't remember posting it here before, so here it is in all my purple glory back in 2003.

YouTube Femulate Channel

I have nothing to do with it, but there is now a Femulate channel on YouTube. Ashley informed me about it and I checked it out briefly, but I did not watch the three videos that are online there. Maria Jose from Finland is responsible for the channel.

Join the Club

If I Could Be A Woman

This video was a recommendation on Genderfork, a blog that I recommend.

Aspiring Ednas

Marlena wrote, "Your readers may find it interesting that a number of high schools and amateur theater groups in the U.S. and U.K. are now mounting their own productions of the musical Hairspray, complete with what looks like some quite good femulating by a troupe of aspiring Edna Turnblads in drag."

Check out these examples: 1, 2, and 3.

Real World

After an event like the banquet on Saturday night, it is very difficult to return to the "real" world on Monday morning.

After my daily regimen of moisturizer and anti-aging creams this morning, I wanted to apply my makeup.

When I walked into my closet to fetch clothes to wear today, I wanted to pick out a dress and a matching bag and heels.

Throughout the day, my feet still felt like I was wearing heels and I caught myself walking on my tiptoes a number of times and if no one was around, I kept walking on my tiptoes..

Also, my mind was somewhere else today.

Luckily, today I was Photoshopping images in an assembly-line fashion --- so my mind could be somewhere else.

And somewhere else is a place I have visited many times in the past.

It is a place where I debate myself about living in the "real" world vs. living in the real world.

So far, the debate always concludes with me returning to the "real" world.

My Feet Hurt

Saturday evening, I attended the annual banquet of the Connecticut Outreach Society at the Four Points Sheraton in Meriden.

I began primping at 2:30 PM and was out the door at 5 PM.

Twenty-five minutes later, I was ringing the bell at my friend Patty's home to show her what I had wrought. Patty answered the door, but she would not let me in because her and her hubby had the bug and did not want me to get it. So I removed my fur coat and modeled my outfit for her while standing on her front porch. She loved my dress and my wig; she said it is the most flattering wig she has ever seen me in.

As I put my coat on and prepared to depart, Patty said she had a gift for me. I could not imagine what she had for me as she repaired to the kitchen to fetch the surprise. She returned with a Barbie Fashionistas head with long wavy blond hair.

I have not played with Barbie dolls in awhile, but evidently they now have a Fashionistas series that allows you to swap heads with different hairdos and makeups. The swappable head  Patty gave me is called "Cutie." She gifted me it to me because of my reputation as a "fashionista." I love it!

And my reputation is well-deserved. My outfit for the banquet included a pair of sexy strappy sandals. I had worn these shoes to the banquet a few years ago and they were foot cripplers. But I figured that since I lost some weight since I wore them last, that they would not hurt as much. Fashionista that I am, I also figured that I would put up with any pain in deference to being fashionable.

As I stood on Patty's doorstep, my feet were already killing me (specifically the balls of my feet) and the night was still young. Patty said I should get gel inserts that they sell to alleviate foot pain.

I thought that that was such a good suggestion that I decided to stop at a CVS on the way to the Sheraton. So, I thanked Patty for the gift and was on my way again.

Five minutes later, I was walking into the CVS way overdressed for a shopping trip. As I walked through the store searching for the foot supplies, one guy checked me out, but the other customers paid me no mind.

I found the foot supplies rack, but what I needed was out of stock, so I exited CVS.

I had a laugh as I walked by the check-out counter. The woman working the register is the cashier that always gives me an odd look when I am in boy mode purchasing L'eggs pantyhose, Kiss stick-on nails, or Nair hair remover. Now here I was walking right past her dressed to kill in girl mod and she did not even notice.

As I got back in my car, I heard a wolf whistle. I did not look around to see where it came from; instead, I got in my car and once I was seated, I looked in the rear and side view mirrors trying to find the whistler, but I was unsuccessful.

I drove to the hotel, parked my car, and walked gingerly inside. I found our banquet room and a lot of old friends and acquaintances. Eventually, there were 50 transgender folks and their significant others in attendance ranging in age from the early 20s to late 70s. I knew about half the crowd; the other half were new to me.

I sat with a table full of old friends and our after-dinner speaker, Ethan St. Pierre. The conversation at that table was rousing and a lot of fun; it made for a great evening.

Old friends stopped by to chat and compare notes on what we had done since our last meeting, which in many cases was last year's banquet.

Wendy, who I have known for over 20 years came by and she was wearing a dress that was exactly like mine except that the silver and gold flecks in the vertical ribbons of my dress were replaced by red flecks in hers (we both bought our dresses at Dress Barn).

Wendy introduced me to one of her friends, Tracey, who is a regular reader of this blog and we had a nice conversation and short photo shoot.,

A cocktail hour, an excellent meal, Ethan's after dinner speech, a poetry reading by Tristan and three songs performed by one talented lady, Deja, filled the first half of the evening, then the DJ virtually spun platters  the rest of the evening.

Since my feet hurt, I only danced to two songs: one I requested ("Dance, Dance, Dance" by the Beach Boys) and "Legs" by ZZ Top. I considered dancing barefooted, but I did not want to ruin my fashionista image. Only kidding! Actually, I worried that I might not be able to get my shoes back on and I did not relish walking barefooted across the parking lot in 20 degree weather. (By the way, a pair of my boy shoes awaited me in the car for the drive home.)

The banquet ended at midnight and four of us moved on to the hotel bar. Saturday night was "salsa night" and the bar was full with mainly a male crowd. The testosterone level was so high that I walked out after walking in, but my friends coaxed me back in and we found four seats together at the bar.

The guys stayed away, but the lady who manages the bar and one of the cocktail waitresses engaged us in conversation. The waitress remarked that we did our makeup better than she did (she needed no makeup, in my opinion) and the manager wanted to know who did our makeup (we all admitted to doing our own makeup). I nursed one drink for an hour and departed about 1:30 AM, and I was home before 2 AM.

During the evening, a long-time friend asked, "So when are you going to get it over with and go 24/7?"

I shrugged. Later I asked her why she asked me that question and her response was the highlight of the evening up to that point.

She said that I have always put such a great effort into my presentation, that mine was the best, that I pass as a woman, et cetera., et cetera, and it follows that I should live 24/7 as a woman. She is well-aware of my marriage situation and realizes I cannot live 24/7; her remark was in jest, but with a big grain of truth embedded in it.

That highlight was topped later in the evening by another long-time friend, who I see about once or twice a year. She remarked, "You are so feminine now," I was surprised at her unsolicited comment and she continued explaining how feminine I have become in my speech and mannerisms.

Wow!

Consciously, I am not intentionally acting or speaking in a more feminine manner. I act naturally without any pretenses.

Have I evolved without realizing it? Am I now completely comfortable in my skin, which is decidedly female, and have escaped all those male shackles that have been holding her back for so long?

Yes.

Banquet Last Night

This photo will have to suffice for now.

I did not get to bed until 2:30 AM , so I am still removing the cobwebs from my head! I promise more words later.

That's my good friend Angie and I posing for photos outside the banquet hall around 10 PM.

Banquet Tonight

Tonight is the biggest transgender social event of the year in this area: the Connecticut Outreach Society's annual banquet. I will be attending with bells on.

About 2 PM, I will drop everything to get ready for the banquet. A close shave, a warm shower, and makeup application will take about an hour, maybe a little longer because my makeup will have to be perfect for the big event. Then I will get dressed, do my hair, and take a few photos, which should take about a half-hour.

My goal is to be out the door by 5 PM. Then I drive 30 minutes to my friend Patty's home to show her my outfit. Finally, a 5-minute drive to the hotel hosting the event and the fun evening begins!

You can expect a full report and photos here in a day or two.

Transgender Student Dresses En Femme For Prom; Mom Does Her Make-Up

Despite the pronoun issues, I so love this story!

(I wish it was me.)

I Wore A Dress To Work Today

Well - it isn't actually a dress. It is a long sleeve green and blue plaid tunic with a hemline that falls just below my derriere. I am wearing it over jeans.

Kind of androgynous --- most people probably won't notice, but in my mind, it is "girly" and that is what counts.

I wonder if any women will notice?

Speaking of women at work...

Last Friday, I met with the head of HR to bitch about my review. She made me feel better about it and when we were done discussing that, she asked how things were going on the transgender front.

During that discussion, she mentioned that she had not told anyone about my coming out to her last spring, but she said that if I thought anyone else should know, she would inform them if I felt uncomfortable about doing it.

I admitted that I thought she might have informed the other HR rep because it was her duty to share that kind of information (what do I know about HR). She assured me that she would not tell anyone without my permission.

I thought about it over the weekend and figured it would be good to have as many HR people in my corner as possible. For example, if something came up while the head of HR was away, it would be nice to have a backup who knew about my situation. So early this week, I asked the head of HR to inform the other HR rep and she said she would.

So now I am officially out to three women here at work.

The Femulated: Harry LeSabre

In Kurt Vonnegut's 1973 novel, Breakfast of Champions, Harry LeSabre was a car salesman at a Midland City Pontiac dealership owned by Dwayne Hoover. Harry was a "transvestite," but only he and his wife knew about it.

For the dealership's Hawaiian Week car sale promotion, Dwayne suggested that Harry dress a little more flamboyantly or Dwayne would fire him. This caused Harry to wonder if Dwayne knew that Harry liked to wear women's clothes.

After discussing his suspicions with his wife, he concluded that Harry did not know, and he showed up for work on Monday wearing a green leotard, straw sandals, grass skirt, wreath of flowers and a pink T-shirt inscribed "Make Love Not War."

And so it goes.

(Yesterday’s  The Femulated: image --- repeated here --- was my attempt to celebrate my favorite author's only transgender character.)