Packed

Hurray! I finished packing for my trip to Provincetown for Fantasia Fair.

Tomorrow, I will load the car with my luggage and get on the road mid-morning. I should arrive at my destination mid-afternoon.

In the Way

This blog has suffered the last few days because my life got in the way.

A lot of stuff has hit the proverbial fan during the last few days. Nothing bad — just time-consuming stuff I have to deal with before I travel to Provincetown for Fantasia Fair on Sunday.

So please stay tuned; we will return to our regular programming shortly.

In His LBD

A Shopping Date

My Next Career

I want to be Vanna White when I grow up.

What a dream job she has!

• Wear a new gorgeous outfit every day

• Have a personal hair stylist and makeup artist

• Work 2.5 hours per week

• Travel across the USA

• Wear a new gorgeous outfit every day

I am ready to step into Vanna's high heels at a moment's notice if she decides to retire from the Wheel gig.

Less Womanless

You may have noticed the dearth of womanless events here lately.

It certainly is not because I lack new material. You readers have continued to send me links to womanless events and I thank you for that.

The reason I have not been covering womanless events here lately is because the more womanless events I see, the more I am turned off by them.

In my opinion, a lot of the womanless events disrespect women. This is especially true in the cases when you have a gang of good old boys down at the local men's club, who decide to raise money by putting on ill-fitting dresses and fright wigs to imitate women. Their imitations are such caricatures of women that they result in ridiculing women(intentionally or not).

This offends me.

On the other hand, there are some womanless events that do a better job; where the "gals" make a real effort to look and act like women. I am often in awe of them and appreciate the time and effort that the participants invest in their femulations.

Anyway, I have decided to separate the wheat from the chaff. The high class womanless events will still find a place in my blog, but the events that ridicule women will not.

Accessorize Me

Packing for extended stays en femme is not a big deal. I always have a packing check list, annotated from the previous trip, that helps me avoid forgetting anything.

However, there is one sticking point that comes up every time I pack for an extended stay: what jewelry to pack?

When I get dressed, I often change my jewelry because I am wrong about what I thought would look good with the outfit I am wearing.

It is easy to change my mind about my jewelry when I dress at home because I have my vast collection of cosmetic jewelry on hand to pick and choose from. But I can't take my whole jewelry collection on the road, so I have to guess what will look good with the outfits I plan to wear.

If I already wore an outfit, I have a good idea how to accessorize because I know what worked (and/or what didn't work) last time out. But if I am wearing an outfit for the first time, I am not really sure what will work.

So, I always overpack jewelry-wise.

This is a big "problem" for my Fantasia Fair trip. I will be wearing five new outfits, so that means five unknown sets of accessorizing jewelry! As a result, I really overpacked my jewelry for this trip.

On the plus side, I don't wear as much jewelry as I used to wear. When I was a younger woman, I made sure I always wore earrings, a necklace, a bracelet, a ring or two, and a watch.

Now that I am a mature woman, I usually do not wear that full set of jewelry. I almost always wear earrings, but the necklace, bracelet, rings, and watch are optional depending on the outfit and whether or not I have to be aware of the time.

Anticipation

The anticipation is building!

One week from now, I will be making the four-hour roadtrip to Provincetown to attend my second Fantasia Fair.

Friday, I made a list of everything I have to pack. I figured I could fit it all into two pieces of luggage: a garment bag and a large suitcase. (I will also be taking my tackle box of cosmetics and my computer bag, so that is really four pieces of luggage. That is half the number I hauled to Provincetown two years ago, which make sense since I am going for only a half-week rather than a full-week as I did in 2008.)

Saturday, I packed all my outfits (dresses, skirts, tops, outerwear, and shoes) into the garment bag. That is the bulk of it, so the remainder should easily fit in one large suitcase, which I will pack next Saturday.

My plans for attending Fantasia Fair are loose. Two years ago, I stuck closely to the agenda. As a result, I was busy all the time. This year, I will pick and choose what I want to do, so I should have a more relaxed schedule.

Two things I cannot miss:

• My workshop on Monday afternoon

• An appointment for an image consultation on Tuesday afternoon

I also will not miss any meals and evening activities that are included in the attendance fee.

Other than that, anything goes!

Waiting For Him To Get Dolled-Up

He's Got To Go!

My "Needs"

I still "need" a cocktail dress for Fantasia Fair. I often think about the purple number that I found at Jessica McClintock's, but then I think about its $160 price tag and forget about it.

I was resigned to wearing an old dress that I had worn to a few special occasions in the past. I bought it at Fashion Bug and it always got rave reviews.

Yesterday, it suddenly occurred to me that I had not looked at what Fashion Bug had in their special occasions collection. So, I moseyed on over to their Web site and found just the dress for me!

During my lunch hour, I drove to the closest Fashion Bug store to buy my find, but they had none in stock. The store had a very poor selection of dresses; all their dresses were contained on one 8-foot rack.

Disappointed, I considered ordering online, but I worried since time was running out, I might not get the dress before my departure to Provincetown. And even if the dress showed up in time, there were no assurances that it would fit, so I decided not to order online.

However, I did not give up my quest. This morning, I began phoning other Fashion Bug stores in the area to see if they had the dress in stock. My first call was fruitful and I asked them to hold the dress for me.

I arrived at the store in boy mode during my lunch hour, asked for the dress, and found it to be as nice as I expected it to be. When I asked to try it on, the saleswoman (who had a few years on me) became flustered, hesitated, and then asked me if I wanted to try it on in the "ladies' dressing room" --- as if I had a choice --- Fashion Bug only has ladies' dressing rooms.

I affirmed that I wanted to try it on, so the saleswoman checked the dressing room to make sure no other women were using it. When she was sure it was all clear, she let me in.

I tried on the dress and it fit, so I paid for it and took my prized possession to my car.

The dress is a "Disco Dot Trapeze Dress" and the Fashion Bug web site describes it thusly: Draping knit dress in shimmering disco dots flows from its gathered neckline to just above your knees. Color: Plum" (see the accompanying photo).

A Payless shoe store was a few doors down from Fashion Bug. Since it is always hit and miss shopping for my size at Payless, I usually check out their current stock when I encounter one of their stores. And so I did today.

The saleswoman who greeted me as I entered the store was an old friend, who had been transferred from my neighborhood Payless store. We exchanged pleasantries and then she pointed me in the direction of the shoes in my size range.

I found one pair that interested me: a "Fioni J'Adore Pump" that the Payless web site describes as "Ooh la la! Go retro with this romantic pump. It features an elegant almond toe, sweet ruffle detail, lightly padded insole for comfort and flirty 3.75" wrapped heel with platform. Fabric and manmade materials" (see the accompanying photo).

The shoe color was navy, the fit was perfectly comfortable, and ooh la la, I did not hesitate to buy the pair.

So now I am all set for Fantasia Fair. I just have to pack.

The Girls of Cairo

Daniel Lismore wrote on his blog about his involvement in the casting of a pictorial for POP magazine featuring crossdressers from Cairo, Egypt. His blog post included photos from the pictorial.

The photos are wonderful (sample right). I invite you to visit his blog and view them all.

Thank you, Lorraine Goetsch, for alerting me to this story.

Dear Stana: How Do You Use T-Dar?

Dear Stana,

What do you in the following situation: You're at Fantasia Fair and a trans-woman walks by, but her female presentation is poor. If there are no people around so as not to embarrass her, would you consider offering suggestions to her to improve her presentation?

I have often wondered what would you do.

A Reader


Dear Reader.

I have written about using trans-radar before, but it will do no harm (and maybe some good) if I write about it again.

Trans-radar, or T-Dar for short, is the ability to detect a trans-person when they are presenting in their non-birth gender. For example, you see a tall woman walking through the mall. Suddenly, your T-Dar kicks in and you begin looking for clues that the woman is actually a natal male presenting as a female.

No matter how good you think your T-Dar may be, you seldom have an opportunity to determine whether your T-Dar works correctly or not.

You can confront a suspected trans-person, but that can be disastrous, especially if you are wrong.

I recall reading about a trans-woman who encountered two tall women while shopping. Her T-Dar told her that the two women were trans and she confronted them by introducing herself as trans and saying something to the effect, "You're trans, too, aren't you?"

The two women reacted as if the trans-woman had just gotten off a spaceship from Neptune. They had no idea what she was talking about and when it became apparent to the trans-woman that she had erred, she wished that she was on Neptune.

And even if your T-Dar is correct confronting a suspected trans-person can be a sensitive matter.

Last time I attended the First Event trans convention, I arrived at the hotel in boy mode and took the elevator to the floor to register for the event. The elevator stopped before reaching my destination and a trans-woman got on. I was 101% positive that she was trans and without thinking, I asked her if she was enjoying First Event.

She was taken aback by my query and seemed very uncomfortable. I immediately realized the error of my ways and explained to her that I was trans too, but having just arrived at the hotel, had not changed into girl mode yet. She seemed a little relieved, but I learned a lesson and would think twice before doing that again.

It is probably best that using your T-Dar be a solitary thing. Keep your T-Dar findings to yourself unless, of course, you write a trans-blog, then you can publicize your T-Dar results. ("Yesterday, I saw a trans-woman in ladies' shoes at Macy's.")

On the other hand, I have had trans-women ask me for advice or to give them my opinion about their presentation on occasion. I am always honored when they ask me and I do my best to give them honest advice or a true opinion.

But I would never offer unsolicited advice or opinion to a trans-woman. First and foremost, she is a woman. Would you ever consider giving unsolicited advice or opinion to a non-trans-woman who you happen to encounter anywhere anytime? Of course not because it would be extremely rude. Just because the other woman may be trans is no reason to throw good manners out the window.

Enough said!

By the way, I believe that most trans-people have T-Dar. It almost comes naturally because trans-people look for affirmation that there are other trans-people out there. What better way to affirm that then to actually see another trans-person in person? Seeking that affirmation, trans-people check out potential suspects wherever they go.

Even when my T-Dar determines that the six-foot woman walking through the mall is, in fact, a genetic female, it provides a different kind of affirmation. It affirms that there are genuine tall women out there and as a six-foot-plus trans-woman, it gives me encouragement to go out en femme and join the other tall women out there because I am not alone.

Best Wishes,

Stana

Do you need advice concerning femulation or other crossdressing-related matters, then e-mail me and I will happily give you my opinion on the matter. My e-mail address is stana-stana at sbcglobal.net.

I Want Candy!

Issue #2 of Candy, Luis Venegas' "first transversal magazine," is now on newsstands somewhere!

No Foolin'

How You Polled Your Leg

Last week's poll asked "When you femulate, what kind of hosiery do you usually wear?" and after a week's long poll with 679 respondents, the results are:

• 62% (424 respondents including myself) usually wear pantyhose or tights

• 30% (204 respondents) usually wear stockings

• 7% (51 respondents) usually wear no hosiery at all

I was surprised that 3 out of 10 usually wear stockings. Before the poll started, I guessed that femulators would be more likely to wear stockings than genetic women, but I did not expect that figure to be that much more likely. Personally, I don't know any genetic woman who usually wear stockings, so that 30% result is amazing!

There are some comments to the original post that explain some of the respondent's votes and non-votes; they have only a miniscule effect on the 62-30-7% results.

Long Tall List

It has been awhile since I updated the Famous Females of Height List, and as a result, the update list is very long. So without further ado, here is the update.

5'8" – Connie Briton – actress, television (Spin City) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'8" – Anne Francis (photo right) – actress, film (Forbidden Planet) & television (Honey West) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'8" – Elisabeth Röhm – actress, television (Law & Order) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'8" – Susan Sullivan – actress, film & television (Falcon Crest) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Majel Barrett – actress, television (Star Trek) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Leslie Bibb – actress, television & film (Iron Man) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Katrina Bowden – actress, television (30 Rock) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Margaret Dumont – actress, films (Marx Bros. films) – source: Stana

5'9" – Kate Lang Johnson – actress, television (Hell Cats) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Annie McElwain – actress, television (Shark) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Michaela McManus – actress, television (Law & Order Special Victims Unit) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'9" – Poppi Monroe – actress, television (CSI: Miami) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'10" – Bridget Hall – fashion model – source: Stana

5'10" – Carey Lowell – actress, television (Law & Order) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'10" – Stephanie March – actress, television (Law & Order Special Victims Unit) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'10" – Diane Neal – actress, television (Law & Order Special Victims Unit) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'10" – Laura Prepon – actress, television (That '70s Show) – source: SoCalSecrets

5'11" – Cassie Fliegel – actress, television (The Office) – source: Stana

5'11" – Bettina Wulff – Germany's First Lady – various sources

6'1" – Erin O'Connor – fashion model – source: SoCalSecrets

6'4" – Jackie Meyers – former UNC basketball player – source: Juno Michelle

6'6" – Waltiea Rolle – UNC basketball player – source: Juno Michelle

7'7" – Sandy Allen – correction from previous listing – source: Juno Michelle

One Guy at the Beach

Guiding You to Fantasia Fair

The 2010 Fantasia Fair Participant's Guide is now online. The Guide is the “bible” for folks attending the event… especially first timers. Don't leave your B&B without it.

I perused an earlier edition of the Guide before I ever planned to go to Fantasia Fair. Reading it so enthused me about the Fair that I decided to try to attend the event.

I almost made it in 2007 and finally attended in 2008. Check out the Guide and you too may find yourself planning a trip to Provincetown in mid-October.

This year, I return not only as an attendee, but as a workshop presenter. As a presenter, I am in the Guide, too.

It is so cool that my biography appears on the same page (113) as one of my favorite people, Ethan St. Pierre, who Fantasia Fair is honoring this year with the Virginia Prince Transgender Pioneer Award. My photo also appears on page 67 (just below my workshop description) modeling in the Fantasia Fair fashion show.

How cool is that?

Coincidentally, I had a dream last night in which I was browsing the Guide and found a photo of myself wearing my shoulder-length blond wig, a simple white blouse, a short maroon balloon skirt, and dark brown tights (the photo did not show my feet, so I don't know what shoes I was wearing).

I don't own a maroon balloon skirt, but I liked the look! Now, where can I find a maroon balloon skirt in size 14?

The Smoking Gun