Thursday, December 17, 2009

last night’s dream

girdle091217 I seldom remember my dreams, but when I do remember a dream, it is usually trans-related.

Overnight, I dreamed I was packing to attend a transgender convention. My mother was helping me pack and offered to lend me anything I needed.

Throughout the dream, I kept refusing whatever items she offered because I already had those items in my wardrobe.

Finally, she said with a knowing smile, “I bet you don’t have any of these.”

And with that, she revealed a storage area in the back of her closet that was full of girdles from the 1950s and 1960s.

That got my attention and as I began perusing the girdles to decide what to borrow, I awoke from my dream.

The dream interests me because I never confided in my mother about my crossdressing. I am sure that she knew, but she never brought up the subject.

Almost to her dying day, she often asked me if there was anything I wanted to tell her. At those times, I thought she was just trying to make conversation, but in retrospect, I think she was offering to lend a friendly ear.

I so regret not confiding in my mother. I believe my life would have been different if I knew my mother supported her “daughter.”

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

make mine Chanel, too

chanelsuit In The Huffington Post, Morane Barkai, suggests unleashing the lady in the corporate suit.

She writes, “The problem arises when women dress like men would dress if they were women. When that happens, even a breathtaking babe can turn into an asexual android on a mission to kill. Somehow, as she zips her skirt, the ovaries take leave, and in the process of buttoning her shirt, a figurative Adam's apple bulges in her throat.”

Read the rest of the story here.

By the way, being a fanatical film fan, I could not help noting Ms. Barkai’s erroneous statement that Meg Ryan appeared in the film Working Girl. Methinks Ms. Barkai confused Ms. Ryan for Melanie Griffith.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

'tis the season...

Click on the image to enlarge it.

don’t raise your boy to be macho

boy-playing-with-doll-copy In The Huffington Post, Philip Slater’s writes in his piece titled The Cowardice of Machismo, “We live in a world today… in which women are outnumbering men not only in colleges, but in all the professions, because they aren't mentally crippled by the overwhelming irrelevancy of traditional male gender training -- a training that robs those imbued with it of the mental flexibility necessary to deal with the complex world we actually inhabit. Making boys macho today is condemning them to irrelevance.”

Read the rest of the story here.

Monday, December 14, 2009

fitting in

women_at_work Three years ago, my company was bought out by another company. A reorganization followed, which resulted in my boss (a male) reporting directly to a female about 20 years his junior.

It was no big surprise since my old company was "old school" with very few females in charge, whereas the new company was a relatively new company with many females in charge in various departments.

One month ago, we had a lay-off. My boss was let go. A male and a female co-worker in my department were also let go. A reorganization followed and my new boss is now a female about 20 years my junior. Also they hired back the female co-worker who was let go, but none of the males that were let go.

My profession was a male bastion for ages. Now my department is run by a female and most of my co-workers are female.

When my profession was a male stronghold, the females in my profession tried to fit into the “old boy’s club.” They wore little or no makeup, their hair was in a short style, and they wore tops and slacks – never a skirt or dress. Their only feminine accoutrements were a purse and maybe some stud earrings.

As my profession becomes a female stronghold, maybe I should try to fit in.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Christmas shopping

Christmas time is here again.

I expect to receive gifts from my family, but none of those gifts will be intended for Staci Lana.

I was very good this year and I think I deserve a gift or two with a frill or two. So as I have done in the past, I purchased a couple of gifts for myself today.

There is a dress sale at Vicky's; what more could a boy like me ask for?

I purchased two sweater dresses (pictured here in the colors I ordered) and now I await their delivery.

Merry Christmas to me!

Friday, December 11, 2009

turn off gene and change your sex

Simple technique changes sex of a mouse – and reveals the gender war that rages in all of us

One of the great dogmas of biology is that gender is fixed from birth, determined by the inheritance of certain genes on the X and Y sex chromosomes. But this simplistic idea has been exploded by the latest study, which demonstrated that fully-developed adult females can undergo a partial sex change following a genetic modification to a single gene.

Read the rest of the story today's edition of The Independent.

(Thank you, Gwen, for alerting me to this article.)

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

transgender regret

Joanne Herman, transgender advocate, transwoman, and author of Transgender Explained For Those Who Are Not, wrote an interesting piece about transgender regret on The Huffington Post.

"Many will have regrets about the consequences of their transition, but few will regret the transition itself. In the unusual case where the consequences were overwhelming enough to prompt a de-transition, the return to the old gender is seldom satisfactory either."

Read the rest of the article here.

a picture is worth a thousand words

At 5' 11", Lily Cole is already on my Famous Females of Height list, but after seeing her photo (right) in today's The Huffington Post standing next to Terry Gilliam at a film premiere, I feel she deserves another mention in Femulate today.

Venezuelan womanless pageant breaks machismo mold

The Huffington Post had this story about the Miss Fat Gay competition in Venezuela.

"There are a lot of macho types who don't like seeing men in women's clothing," added Alberto Maia, 27, Miss Aragua. "It's not easy for us. Machismo is a disease."

Read the rest of the story and view a video here and here.

Monday, December 7, 2009

“the femulated” and my heroes/heroines

Don’t know if you noticed, but I recently changed the title of the femulated images (in the left frame of this blog) from “He Femulated” to “The Femulated.” That change was in response to a reader who pointed out that some of the femulated people I featured there might not cotton to the pronoun “he.” Thus, I made the change to a more gender neutral title.

Actually, “The Femulated” was the original title of the femulated images, but when I changed the title of the upper image from “Femulate This” to “Femulate Her,” I changed the title of the lower image to “He Femulated” in order to complement the upper title.

Also, if I have a good online reference for the femulated individual, I will include a link to that reference in the individual’s name in the image caption. For example, if you click on the name of today’s “The Femulated” femulator, Grayson Perry, it brings up Wikipedia’s entry for the artist.

writer091207 my heroes/heroines

Grayson Perry/Claire is one of my heroes/heroines, as is Paul Whitehead/Trisha Van Cleef, who I featured over the weekend in “The Femulated” spot. They are people who femulate and make no bones about it. Although they use femme names when they femulate and have dual identities, they do not have secret identities that they hide behind like I do.

Some days, I seriously consider chucking my secret identity and revealing my dual identity. Then, I come to my senses and reconsider taking that step.

The thing is that lately, the days I consider chucking my secret identity are far outnumbering the days I come to my senses.

I am the kind of person that thinks about doing something, then wakes up one day and just does it letting the pieces fall where they may. Some of those pieces turn out to be insignificant and become non-issues, while those fallen pieces that turn out to be more significant work themselves out eventually.

So, maybe 2010 will be the year that I feature myself in “The Femulated” spot with the caption “<my male name>/Staci Lana Hunter, writer.”

Friday, December 4, 2009

TGIF… really!

I have been a very busy, busy, busy girl this week and I am really glad that Friday is here!

kidman-nine-london-4

Nicole Wears Staci

Viewing the entertainment news on the web this morning, I see one of the premier members of my Famous Females of  Height list, the 5’11’ Nicole Kidman, appearing at the London opening of her latest film, Nine.

I love her outfit; it is so Staci! (I never met a short pleated skirt I didn’t like.) And her shoes are a delight, too (they are “Hamish” from Nine West).

She looks so lovely!

Tuesday Again

After revisiting yesterday’s post and reading your comments, I have additional thoughts about my day out en femme on Tuesday.

To improve our outreach skills, we read the student’s comments/reactions after each class. They are interesting at a minimum and often reveal things we would never know otherwise, so they are very valuable tools.

I ate up the positive comments about my outfit, as well as the comments that some students were flabbergasted when they learned our birth genders.

I was surprised that some of the students were apprehensive about our visit. They did not say what caused their apprehension, but the good news was that their fears disappeared when they learned that we are real people just like they are.

If they all left with that positive impression, I think we did our job.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Tuesday en femme: the whole story

Morning

I feel so invigorated when I awake on a day I am going out en femme and Tuesday was no different.

I did my makeup and hair and achieved a different look.

I penciled in my eyebrows as I think they should look and then I took a tweezer and removed every hair that was not inside the boundaries I had penciled in. The result was stunning! It was the first time I had truly feminine eyebrows and I wanted to show them off.

Usually, I wear my hair with bangs to cover my less than feminine eyebrows, but yesterday, I parted my hair on one side and swept my bangs aside to reveal my eyebrows.

Cosmetic experts say that you should emphasize your eyes or your lips, but not both. With all the attention on my eyes, I used a pale pink lipstick rather than my usual choice of a red shade.

Overall, I looked different, maybe a little younger and I was very satisfied with my makeup work.

I finished dressing and checked myself out in the mirror. I immediately disliked my gold chainlink necklace and earrings. I don't know if it was their color or what, but they just did not go with my outfit, so I chucked the necklace. Before I hit the road, I chucked the earrings, too. I did not have anything else that was better, so I went without jewelry except for my watch.

I snapped a few photos, grabbed my purse, drove to the mall 15 minutes away, and arrived just as the stores were opening.

Originally, I intended to shop for a coat, but now I had some new shopping ideas.

The dress I was wearing had a neckline that should reveal something besides the flat plains of Kansas. After all, I nearly fill a B cup, so I figured with a little adjustment, some of that B could be revealed. My plan was to visit Victoria's Secret and shop for a bra that could do push-ups.

I walked halfway across the mall to Vickie's. The mall was quiet, mostly store staff and elderly shoppers. No one paid much attention to me except for one gent, who ogled me.

Entering Vickie's, a saleswoman welcomed me and I told her what I wanted. She directed me to Jackie, their bra saleswoman and I told her what I wanted, too. She said she had just what I needed and asked me my bra size.

"38B" was not what she wanted to hear and she explained that the perfect bra for me only came in C cups (and beyond). She suggested trying on a 36C and/or a 38C. I agreed and she fetched one in each size in my color of choice (black), then escorted me to the dressing room.

I removed my dress and bra and tried on the 36C. It was too small and I never even tried to hook it closed. The 38C was a better fit and gave a big boost to my breasts. The flat plains of Kansas gave way to the rolling hills of Southern New England.

Jackie checked me out, adjusted the straps, and proclaimed that it was a perfect fit.

I decided to wear my new bra for the rest of the day, so I put on my dress, exited the dressing room, and immediately was aware of the new topography below my neckline. Wow! I felt like a new woman.

My next shopping goal was to find earrings to go with my outfit. Clip-on earrings are a rare commodity and I was not optimistic.

I tried Claire's and asked the saleswoman if she had any. She showed me the racks containing clip-ons and there were only about 25 pairs in all, but there was one pair that was perfect: a pair of dark gold open disk earrings about 1-1/4-inch in diameter.

I paid for the earrings, exited the store, found a seat in the mall, and put on my purchase, which you can see in the photo above.

I strolled through the mall and perused the dress racks in Macy's and JCPenney's. There were a lot of nice dresses, but only one that I really wanted to buy, but sadly, it was not in my size. So, I left the mall empty-handed albeit with new bling on my ears and new lingerie supporting my breasts.

It was a nice morning at the mall, but the afternoon was coming up fast and it was time to drive to Southern Connecticut State University in New Haven where I would visit two human sexuality classes to do outreach.

Afternoon

Twenty-five minutes later, I parked my car in the university parking lot. I freshened my makeup, then walked to the correct classroom building where I met my fellow presenters, two male-to-female transsexuals, the spouse of one, and a female-to-male transsexual.

I have done outreach with all of them before and we chatted until Professor Anna Schildroth arrived and escorted us to the classroom. (The photo below shows me and Professor Schildroth in the student center between classes.)

As we enter the classroom, I always pay attention to the students' reaction when they first see us. Usually, they try to act cool and not pay any special attention to us, but some sneak peeks at us surreptitiously and a few check us out thoroughly. We usually surprise them because we are not what they expected because we are convincing in our presentations.

Both classes had about 30 students with females in the majority.

We each gave a short description of ourselves.

Mine was different than in the past. I basically reiterated what I wrote in my Whatever Works blog entry , i.e., "I am not a woman trapped in a man's body, I am really a woman. I think as a woman, I emote as a woman, I act as a woman, I speak as a woman, and whenever the opportunity arises, I present as a woman. To most of my acquaintances I am the most womanly male they know and that's because I really am a woman."

No one blinked when I said this.

After our short biographies, the class and presenters split into two groups and each half of the class had an opportunity to ask us all questions. I was teamed with the male-to-female transsexual and her spouse.

A few of the students asked questions, but the majority was silent, so whenever I had an opportunity to answer a question, I went on and on answering it in the hope that something I said would draw them out.

The "how did you arrive at your female name" query came up in each session.

Another repeated question for me was about my nails; the questioners wanted to know what I did about my acrylic nails since I was in boy mode most of the time. Stick-on fake nails was my answer and they usually responded "they look as good as acrylics."

A couple of questions/comments were complimentary. One female student said my hair looked great and wanted the details about my hairdo. A couple of female students loved my shoes and wanted to know where I bought them. Still another complimented me on my fashion sense.

Another female student asked if guys ever hit on me and what do I do if they do. I consider that question very complimentary because the questioner must think I look good enough that a guy might hit on me.

I did receive one question that I never received before: since I stated that I am attracted to women and not men, does that make me a lesbian? I guess so.

By the way, my shoes were comfortable until I developed a blister on the fourth toe of each foot. Even with the blisters, they were still tolerable. In fact, I was unaware of the blisters until I took off my pantyhose at the end of the day.

The class ended at 4:30 PM and I was spent, but it was another great day out en femme.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Tuesday en femme

20091201 I am very busy today and do not have time to write about my day out en femme on Tuesday. I promise to write all about it real soon now, but until then, I will leave you with a photo of myself ready to go out yesterday morning.

As they say, “a picture is worth a thousand words.”

Monday, November 30, 2009

Tuesday en femme

Untitled-1 Tuesday is a day out en femme for me.

I plan to be dressed and out the door in time to go shopping as soon as the stores open in the morning.

In the afternoon, I will visit two human sexuality classes to do outreach about being trans.

I will probably eat lunch in between classes at the student center and/or I may go out to eat after the second class.

Whatever I do, I will have a full report here for you to read as soon as possible.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

What is it that makes a woman?

For his final year degree show at London South Bank University, Lee Slaymaker asks, "What is it that makes a woman? Or for that matter a man? Gender is often argued to be a social construction, free of the constraints of biological sex, with the result being that the term ‘woman’ may just as easily be applied to a feminine male subject as it is to a female one."

For the project, Mr. Slaymaker created three photographic images titled The Woman As Homemaker, The Woman As Sexual Object, and The Woman As Chef (photo above).

In each photo, a male inhabits the feminine role, "thus calling in to question the rigidity of socially accepted notions of the gender binary: not only do these images seek to challenge representations of the feminine gender but also those of the male subject."

To see the entirety of Mr. Slaymaker's project, click here.