a boy and his boobs

Yesterday, I was listening to a podcast by Ethan St. Pierre's "The Radicalguy" in which he interviewed Mila Pavlin.

During the interview, the Mila mentioned that as a young pre-op transwoman, she was mortified whenever she had to remove her top to go swimming or participate in other activities in which males were expected to go shirtless because in her mind, she was female and going topless was not something females did in public. During such occurrences, she would try to cover up with a towel in order to feel less embarrassed.

When I was young, I experienced something similar whenever I was expected to be shirtless because I have boobs. I don't know if my breast development was the result of being overweight, hormone imbalance, Gynecomastia, or a combination of some or all of the above. Whatever... I have boobs that nearly fill a B cup bra.

In my youth, my breasts embarrassed me; I would notice people checking out my breasts and occasionally, I would hear hurtful comments like "He should wear a bra?" As I grew older, I began avoiding situations where I had to go shirtless and as an adult, I am never in a public situation without a shirt.

On the other hand, I am very happy with natural breasts when I am en femme and I seldom have to wear anything in my bra to augment my bust. The only time I stuff my bra is when I wear a low-cut top or dress and want to display some cleavage (as in the accompanying photo). To achieve cleavage, I tape my breasts together, but by doing so, my bra cups are only half-filled, so I use stuffing to fill out the cups. But normally, the only thing in my bra is me.

Admittedly, my breasts are small for a woman my size, but they are all mine and they feel as natural as can be. And my breasts are no longer an embarrassment; they have become an asset.

Crossdressed in the Past

(Click on an image to enlarge it.)

I'm going to Disney World ...for crossdressers!

I'm going to Fantasia Fair (or "Disney World for Crossdressers," as I like to think of it).

Fantasia Fair (FanFair for short) is an annual week-long mid-October event (October 19-26 this year)in Provincetown, Cape Cod, Massachusetts, where the boys are girls and the girls are boys and all the transfolk have the run of the town presenting themselves in their gender of choice 24/7.

I have many friends and acquaintances who have attended FanFair in the past and they have nothing but great things to say about their experience. They have urged me to go, but until now, I have been unable to do so.

Presenting as a woman 24/7 for a week will be a new experience. I have done three-day events in the past, but not a week-long event, so this will be more of a real life test for me!

Anyway, I am thrilled that I will be able to go this year. And I wonder how the experience will effect me.

how do you put a bra on

Robin sent me this link to a cute video and I am passing it on to you.

top shoe trends for fall 2008

"The era of the ostentatious 'it' bag is over. Blaring logos are dead.

"But this fall, statement shoes are bigger, taller, and more opinionated than ever."

Kate Schelter wrote all about fall shoes here.

dress to shop

Meg wrote, "When you're dressed and shop, what do you wear?

"I'm planning to talk to saleswomen and ask to try clothes on next time I go. I've wanted to but never done it so far.

"Is a dress better than a skirt/blouse? If I'm wearing the latter and I want to try on a dress, I have to remove both and there May Be Many Buttons. If I wear the former, I need to find a top to go with a bottom, or vice-versa when I want to try one on, and if the dress goes over my head my wig could get out-of-sorts (also with a pullover top, hence the worry about buttons.

"How about sharing your experiences?"

I'll gladly share my experience, Meg.

When I go shopping and plan to try clothes on in the store, I wear something that is easy to take off and put on, so usually a dress without a lot of buttons. Also, something that has a wide collar so as not to muss up my hair and makeup when I pull it off and on (so avoid anything with a turtleneck).

The best thing I ever wore shopping was a dress that had a zipper up front that zipped from the neckline to the hemline of the dress. I could get in and out of that dress quick like a bunny.

Also, to minimize changing back into the outfit you wore into the store, take as many outfits as the store allows to the dressing room. Or shop in a store where there is personalized service with a salesperson at your beck and call to fetch outfits for you while you are in the dressing room.

If you are shopping for a skirt to match a top or vice versa, then that is a different story and you will want to wear whatever you are trying to match, unless it is so generic that you can find something in the store to use for matching.

On the other hand, if you are just skirt shopping, for example, wear an easy on-and-off dress. When you find the skirts you want to try on, grab a top, too, so that you will have something to model with the skirts. Of course, you don't have to purchase the top, but then you might find one that goes so nicely with the skirt you are buying that you will just have to buy the top, too!

I hope that helps!

---

Occasionally, I receive e-mails asking for advice. Often, the writers of these e-mails indicate that they are hesitant about writing to me for advice because they don't want to bother me.

On the contrary, I love receiving e-mails asking for advice. My maternal side loves to help others if she can, so please feel free to ask. Maybe I can help you and maybe you will help me by expanding my knowledge of the transworld. And maybe our e-mail exchange will inspire me to write an interesting blog posting (like this one).

So, use the "send me e-mail" link on the right to write to me.

where I left off

Busy weekend, not much blogging. In fact, I was so busy yesterday that I did not touch a keyboard until nearly 5 PM, which is almost unheard of in my little world!

I left off with you here Friday morning after I bought that jacket and skirt set on clearance from Spiegel.

After work, I went to the mall to see if Payless had any of the new shoes I was pining for. My timing was great because on Friday was the first day of Payless' frequent Bogo sales (buy one, get one half off).

Nothing gets hands-on service faster than when a 6' 2" guy walks into Payless and heads down the aisle where the woman's size 10-12 shoes are stationed. The saleswoman who greeted me as I walked in almost immediately made a bee-line for me and asked if I needed any help.

I asked her about the new shoes I saw online and she indicated that they were on display at the front of the store. I told her "I do drag" and my size. She had all three pairs, but only two in my size: the American Eagle Latte Mary Jane and the Koko Gilley Pump.

I asked the saleswoman if any of the surrounding Payless stores had the Haste Patent Oxford Pump in my size. She recommended that because of the shoe's design that I look for that shoe one size larger. She went online to check the other nearby stores, but they did not have it in stock.

I bought the two that they had in stock and continued shopping around the mall. The sad state of the economy was really apparent. It was Friday afternoon and the mall was dead despite the fact that it was prime back-to-school shopping time.

On a positive note, as soon as I walked into a store, I usually had an attentive salesperson at my beck and call. Window-shopping, I saw a cute outfit on display, so I went in the store and a saleswoman asked to be of assistance. I was unfamiliar with the store's clothing line, so I asked her how large did their sizes go up to.

She said "14," then asked, "What size does she wear?"

I replied, "I wear 16s or 18s depending on the style of clothing."

Without batting an eye, she said that the store was opening an online store real soon now with sizes going up to 18 and that I should check it out.

I thanked her and went on my way.

I continued shopping, but did not see anything I had to have, so I exited the mall with my new shoes in bag.

crossdressed in the past

(Click on the image to enlarge it.)

clearance sale

Every day of the week, I get an e-mail from Spiegel touting their sale du jour.

I like Spiegel's clothing and have bought a few items from them in the past, but most of the time I don't buy anything because they are expensive.

Today's e-mail from Spiegel announced a clearance sale, so I dutifully checked out what they had on sale and I found the pictured jacket and skirt that I had died for in the past on sale and in my size!

Originally, they cost $79 and $39 respectively, but on clearance, they were $13.99 and $6.99, so how could I resist! In addition, I got 20% off my order by signing up for a Spiegel credit card. So, what would have cost me (with shipping and handling) $126.94 back when I was dying for it, now cost me only $25.72!

Can this girl shop or what!

vintage vriday

FYI, the woman featured in today's Vintage Vriday edition of Femulate This: is the late Italian actress Alida Valli, who was best known on this side of the Atlantic for her role in The Third Man.

Tricia Helfer

Greg wrote to tell me that Tricia Helfer of Battlestar Galactica fame is 5' 10" tall, so I added her to the Famous Females of Height list.

new news feature

About half way down this blog's sidebar, you will find a new feature: NEWS. Click on "transgender" for a list of transgender news articles or "crossdress" for crossdress news articles.

Transgender Contestant to Compete on Top Model

(updated below)

(This bit of news popped up yesterday afternoon, so you may have read about it already, but I think I should mention it here in case any of you missed it.)

One of the 14 girls who will compete on the new season of America's Next Top Model – which returns to The CW on September 3 – is transgender.

Read all about it here.

UPDATE: I just read the comments to this article and found it interesting that most of them were supportive and only a few were from yahoos.

Staci needs new shoes

I love shoes and I own too many pairs, but I can't resist them. My favorite shoe store du jour has three new models for the fall season that are calling my name. (Click on the photo to make them bigger.)

American Eagle Latte Mary Jane — "The American Eagle Latte Mary Jane features a comfortable round toe, two pretty Mary Jane straps with adjustable buckles, a padded insole and a 4" two tone wrapped heel. Manmade materials."

I am a sucker for Mary-Janes and I love the color of this pair, but I may hold off buying them because I already have many Mary-Janes.

Haste Patent Oxford Pump — "This sleek, trend-right bootine features a patent upper with shoestring piping, a menswear cap toe, laces for the full oxford feel and a towering 4" wrapped heel. Padded insole. Manmade materials."

I love these booties and are Staci "must haves"!

Koko Gilley Pump — "Make a bold fashion statement with this retro-inspired pump. It features a faux suede upper with a peep toe and a 4" patent stiletto heel. The shoelace tie gives it a trend-right oxford feel. Fabric and manmade materials."

These shoes are so chichi and are also Staci "must haves."

a world where men can wear skirts

Catherine Price writes here that "Maybe a time will come when one of my oldest fashion grievances -- that it's OK for women to wear pants, but demeaning for a man to wear 'female' clothing -- will be laid to rest."

high women updated

I added a few more women to the Famous Females of Height list.

killed the diet "progress"

I am still trying to lose weight, but I decided to stop posting my progress (or lack thereof) on the blog.

The intention for posting my progress was "to keep me on track" so that "I will be less likely to cheat because I would be embarrassed when I publicize any weight gains here."

That sounded good in theory, but it did not work in practice and so, it goes.

(You got to love this photo of the woman weighing herself in heels. Maybe that is where I went wrong; I should have worn strappy high heels whenever I weighed myself!)

On The Importance Of Details

Ignore the details and you may draw attention to yourself... and not in a good way

This excellent article about the importance of details should be required reading for anyone trying to pass as a woman, whether she is male or female.

dream analysis

I visited the town library yesterday to look at the books they had on dream analysis trying to find references to dreams about crossdressing. There were about a half dozen books and I looked through them all.

One book devoted one paragraph to the subject and was not very revealing. In a nutshell, the book indicated that if you dreamed about crossdressing, then you may have gender issues!

Who would have thought?

random thoughts on a rotten day

I am on vacation and it is a dank and dreary day today, so I am spending some time blogging because going out is not too inviting.

I went to the Mohegan Sun casino yesterday. I had a good time. I have a better time when I win, but even when I lose or break even, it is interesting.

I like to watch the people in the casino. I have been thinking about going to the casino en femme one day this fall, so I made mental notes concerning the wardrobes of the female patrons. If you see an ad for the casino on television or visit the casino's Web site, all the women are dressed to the nines. Maybe that is the case on a Friday or Saturday night, but not on a weekday. I estimate that 95% of the female patrons wore slacks, trousers, jeans, or shorts; about 5% wore skirts. The only dresses I saw were on women, who work at the casino.

I ate dinner at a Mexican restaurant at the casino: SolToro Tequila Grill. The meal was excellent, but it did not do much good for my diet!