Friday, May 11, 2007

trans-woman elected president Of SF police commission

The San Francisco Police Commission has elected openly-transgender Commissioner Theresa Sparks as its new President.

Sparks, who joined the commission in 2004, has a long history of advocating for the transgender community, including working on a set of transgender-specific policy reforms adopted by the Police Commission in 2003.

Read the rest of this very interesting story here.

actresses portraying trans-women

I have a pet peeve: actresses portraying trans-women.

Here are two recent portrayals that come to mind that are so unrealistic: Rebecca Romijn on Ugly Betty and Famke Jannsen on Nip/Tuck.



Both are television portrayals, but the film industry is just as guilty using actresses to portray trans-woman, for example, Raquel Welch in Myra Breckenridge and Felicity Huffman in Transamerica.

Male actors should portray trans-woman because such portrayals would be more realistic if men filled the T-girl roles. Few actresses are the right size to realistically portray a male T-person. Their voices are not convincing and in boy mode, their mannerisms are not convincing.



When male actors do portray trans-woman, the portrayals are very realistic. Cillian Murphy in Breakfast on Pluto, Lee Pace in Soldier's Girl, and Johnny Depp in Ed Wood are examples of successful portrayals of actors portraying trans-woman.

Can you imagine someone like Drew Barrymore portraying Ed Wood? I think not.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

miniskirts in history


The cacina, a sacred dance, at the Zuni Pueblo, New Mexico

Report upon United States Geographical Surveys West of the One Hundredth Meridian, in charge of Capt. Geo. M. Wheeler, Corps of Engineers, U.S. Army, 1875-1889

Jean Shrimpton, British birds, and miniskirts

Surfing the net, I came across the name Jean Shrimpton. Do you remember her? I do.

In the 1960s, Jean Shrimpton was a supermodel long before they coined the term "supermodel." She was English, part of the swinging London scene, and I was infatuated with her. In fact, I was so infatuated with her that I wanted to be just like her, which was kind of difficult for An overweight 16-year-old guy with acne.

About that time, my cousin dressed up as Twiggy for Halloween. He was a perfect Twiggy because he and she both had freckles and stick-thin pubescent figures.

Another Halloween, I dressed, more or less, like Jean Shrimpton. I certainly was not stick-thin and in my opinion, nether was Jean... well, not as stick-thin as Twiggy. Also, in my opinion, Jean was prettier than Twiggy and I was prettier than my cousin, so dressing like Jean Shrimpton certainly made sense to me.

Another British bird, Jacqueline Bisset, became one of my crossdressing models. My fascination with British girls had something to do with the miniskirt.

The mini was invented in Britain by fashion designer Mary Quant and it became the defining fashion symbol of "swinging London" in the 1960s. All the British "birds" wore miniskirts, more so than American girls, and I wanted to wear miniskirts just like the girls in Britain did.

When I made my first Halloween outing en femme as Jean Shrimpton, the dress I wore was just not short enough, so I used safety pins to shorten the hem, thus, my knee length dress became a thigh high mini.

Anyway, my attraction to the British distaff side continues to this day with Elizabeth Hurley and Kate Beckinsale now at the top of my wish (I was she) list. And I still like to wear short skirts!

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

mother's day thoughts

Mom died last summer. She was the most influential person in my life and influenced my penchant for crossdressing in a number of ways.

She was beautiful and did not need makeup. Lipstick, powder, and rouge were all she ever used. I know because I used to enjoy watching her put on her minimal makeup.

She always dressed like a fashionable lady and that was difficult to accomplish because money was tight when I was a kid. As a result, Mom sewed her own clothes, as well as clothes for my sister. I guess I was a little jealous of my sister and wished that Mom would sew something for me, but there were few sewing patterns for boys' clothing. However, I would have been perfectly happy if she sewed a pretty dress for me like she did for my sister.

My Dad was a great guy, but he was not around much when I was growing up. He worked all the overtime he could get to make ends meet. For a few years, he also had a second job. I can remember way back to my earliest memories when I actually thought that my father was a visitor because his appearances at home during my waking hours were so rare. So, during my formative years, Dad was at work, while my Mom was at home raising my sister and me.

Since I was raised in an environment where the father figure was absent most of the time, it is no wonder that I tended to follow in the footsteps of the only figure that was available to me, my Mom. As a result, I admired her and wanted to do the things she did.

To add to my confusion, Mom often commented that because I had such nice legs, I should have been a girl. If she had made that comment once, I probably would have forgotten about it, but it seemed to me that she made that comment whenever she saw my legs bare. Don't you think that may have influenced me?

She also made comments about the way I walked. She said I "tippy-toed," i.e., I walked on my toes. I assumed from her comments that tippy-toeing was not the correct way for a male to walk, but I did not know how to walk any other way. She never showed me how I was supposed to walk, so I just kept on tippy-toeing.

I don't tippy-toe any longer. As I grew older, I must have figured out how to walk like a man. However, all my early years tippy-toeing may have facilitated my walking in high heels because ever since I slipped on my first pair, I never had a problem walking in heels.

I always took after the maternal side of my family ("You look like your mother"). So, it is no surprise that when I dress en femme, I resemble my Mom.

I don't know if Mom knew about her other daughter. I suspect she did because once she let it slip out that she was aware of my secret stash of female paraphernalia, but except for that one time, she never mentioned it.

Anyway, Happy Mother's Day, Mom!

From your loving daughter, Staci.

transgender deceiver

Largo, Fla., city manager Steve Stanton attended a conference at city expense and dressed as a woman for two seminars without telling the city. Was he deceiving the citizens of Largo or just being incredibly prudent?

Read the whole story here.

transgender teens come out in Canada at young ages

As a child, Adrian Daniels wore hockey jerseys. He dreamed of marrying figure-skating champion Katarina Witt. And each night before he went to bed, he prayed that he would wake up the next morning with something he had always wanted: a penis.

Read the rest of the story here.

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

transgender law deadline approaching as New Jersey businesses watch and wait

On June 12, 2007, New Jersey Bill S362 will take effect, adding “gender identity or expression” to the list of classes protected from discrimination. Employers whose actions discriminate against transgender employees may face lawsuits. Difficult compliance issues face human resources officials, including questions like which bathroom to use, how to address co-worker and customer concerns, how to change official records, and insurance coverage of transgender health care.

For the rest of the story, go here.

Miss Transgender crowned in Nepal

Less than a month after the controversial staging of the Miss Nepal pageant, the country's gay community has held a Miss Transgender contest, in a double defiance of the Maoist opposition to beauty pageants as well as homosexuality.

Read the rest of the story here.

Monday, May 7, 2007

Once Again the HRC Sells Out Trans…

Read the bad news here!

still more guy things

I spent some more time doing guy things during lunch today.

I went to Home Depot to buy some super glue to fix one of my earrings. Then, I went to Payless to buy some new shoes, but they did not have the high heels I wanted in my size. Finally, I went to Kohl's and bought a darling dress: a black and white floral tie-back dress. It was on sale for $29.99, marked down from $50. I had a $25 gift card, so it only cost me $4.99 out of pocket.

a passing interest

This is a follow-up to my day doing outreach at two Human Sexuality classes at a local university last Tuesday.

I failed to mention how well I passed in my earlier post about that day!

As I wrote previously, I brought a second pair of shoes in case the first pair hurt my feet. By the end of the first class, my 3-1/2-inch stilettos had to go, so I asked D for the keys to her car so I could fetch my more comfortable shoes.

As I walked to her car, I saw a university dump truck parked right in front of D's car. The driver was talking with another university employee standing next to the truck. Oh, damn, just what I needed: the classic trans-woman nightmare, a Tranny Vs. Macho Guy face-off.

I was ready for the worst! Making a beeline for D's car, I tried to ignore the guys, but, the guy standing by the side of the truck greeted me with a very flirtatious, "Good afternoon." while the guy in the truck smiled appreciatively as he drove away. They flirted with me! Wow – that was an affirming moment.

I switch shoes for a pair that was a little lower and a little wider and now I have to find the Student Union where D, M, and the professor were camped out in between classes. I had been in the Student Union before, but in the past, I just followed the professor to the building without paying attention to how we arrived there.

I got lost fast, so I asked for directions. First I asked a couple - girl and guy students - for directions. The guy was a real gentleman. He left the girl and walked with me down the sidewalk to a place where I could actually see the Student Union building... sort of. And pointed me in the right direction… sort of.

I headed in that general direction, but I was still a little lost. In the next building, I found two girls seated at a table selling tickets to something or other, so I asked them for directions and received similar treatment.

My success at passing was amazing that day especially since I thought that I didn't think I look my best!

Did I really pass or were the people I encountered just being very respectful of a person showing a lot of diversity?

I have no doubt that I passed with the truck guys. If they knew I was a guy, I don't think they would have flirted with me.

I probably also passed with the male student who gave me directions. He was just a little bit too solicitous dumping the young girl student to help out the older businesswoman on campus.

My encounter with the girls selling tickets was too short, so I don't know for sure, but I did not receive any discouraging signals from them.

Needless to say, I was very pleased.

And I apologize to my readers if this all seems a little tedious, but I am still at a stage in my trans-life where passing is still important and I want to note all my successes and failures.

Which bathroom to use is no easy question for transgendered people

Read about it here.

By the way, I have never had a hassle using a woman's restroom when I am out en femme.

guy things redux

Saturday afternoon, I went to the mall to buy a new dress, wallet, and shoes. I came home empty-handed. I saw nothing I liked.

That's what I get for going to a s'mall. I should have gone to a big mall where there are more stores and larger versions of the stores I visited at the s'mall.

Saturday, May 5, 2007

guy things

My wife is going to a baby shower this afternoon, so I will be on my own and free to do some guy things. My plan is to go to JCPenney at the mall and buy a new dress and wallet, then go to Payless to buy some new high heel shoes.

Friday, May 4, 2007

my dream job

When I was a kid, adults often asked me (just like they probably asked you), "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

I would answer with a definitive, "I dunno."

In reality, I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I didn't dare tell anyone because I wanted to be a female impersonator (or FI, for short).

Female impersonation is not the kind of career choice that is going to make Uncle Joe or Aunt Nelly proud of their nephew, so I kept a lid on my dreams and never ran away from home to join the Jewel Box Revue.

I regret that decision now, but I try to make up for it through occasional female emulation. I also live the life of a female impersonator vicariously by reading about the subject as often as I can.

If you are interested in female impersonation, I recommend a couple of sites on the Internet that deal with its history:

Drag Artists & Female Impersonators, which is part of JD Doyle's Queer Music Heritage Web site.

David de Alba's Web site – Alba was a female impersonator and his Web site includes interviews with other female impersonators and pictorial tributes of other FIs.

Thursday, May 3, 2007

Vermont House Votes to Add Transgender Protections

Read about the good news from our neighbors up north.

Alexis Arquette On Being Transgender

I always found Alexis to be interesting. Read about her latest adventures here.

a tough question, a tougher answer

Whenever I tell my trans life story like I did at two Human sexuality classes on Tuesday, I always mention that I never told my wife about my crossdressing before we were married because I bought into the old wives' tale that marriage would cure me of crossdressing.

When I did come out to my wife about crossdressing after we were married, she was initially supportive, but less so as the years passed. Meanwhile, I became better at crossdressing mainly due to her suggestion that I seek out a support group, which taught me how to be a better crossdresser. Regardless, I enjoy crossdressing a lot and would do it more often if my wife did not dislike it so. And I feel guilty for not telling her before we got married, so I only crossdress once or twice a month in deference to her.

On Tuesday, one of the female students asked me if I could do it over again and told my wife about my crossdressing before marriage and as a result, she dumped me, what would I do? Would I continue dating and try to find a woman that accepted my crossdressing? Or what?

That was a very thoughtful question and a difficult one to answer quickly. I replied that if I could do it over again and my wife rejected me before marriage because of my crossdressing*, then I probably would continue looking. I know that such a woman would be very hard to find and that I would probably be unsuccessful, give up, and live full time as a woman.

Truthfully, if I had to do it over again, I would live full time as a woman and skip the formalities of searching fruitlessly for a woman that accepted me. If one came along, that would be great, but I would not put a lot of effort into finding Ms. Right.

Recently, there was a survey posted on Helen Boyd's message board asking "what woman you'd actually want to be?" There were a wide variety of answers, but mine was unique: "Staci Hunter - I very much like the woman I am when I crossdress. If I could live as Staci full-time, I think I would be one heck of a woman and would not want to be anyone else."

I really believe that!

So, do I owe it to myself to live the way I want to live? Should I burn all my bridges behind me and start living as a woman on a full-time basis? Do I abandon my commitment to my wife and become the woman I want to be? We only go around once. I won't have this opportunity again. I just don't know.

* By the way, I asked my wife if she would have dumped me if I had told her about my crossdressing before we were married and she replied that she probably would have stuck with me anyway.

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

yesterday, all my troubles seemed so faraway

Yesterday, I participated in two Human Sexuality classes at a local university with two other trans-woman. In each class, we each took turns telling our trans-life stories and then the class asked questions.

In the first class, there were only two of us, D and myself because M was stuck in traffic. After our biographies, the professor split the class into two groups for the question and answer period. When I participated in the past, the professor was unable to do this because there were no empty classrooms available, but yesterday a room was available across the hall, so half the class followed me there and we had our Q&A period.

I found that this arrangement was much better than when the whole class asked questions to all the trans-participants. The group was smaller, more intimate, and personal, so the students were less inhibited asking questions. Also, since I was the only one answering questions, they concentrated on my transness and I did not have to deal with transsexual questions.

In the second class, an empty room was not available, so the class was not split, and the Q&A period was noticeably less dynamic with a lot of lulls and dead air.

In both classes, most of the questions I answered were similar to ones I answered in past classes, but there were a few unique questions, too.

Q: When you are out crossdressed in public, have you ever run into someone you knew and what did you do?

A: It occurred once. I was shopping in a department store and saw a female co-worker. Normally, I would have just continued shopping because I am confidant that no one recognizes me when I am crossdressed. But in this case, I avoided my co-worker because she had seen me crossdressed for a Halloween costume contest that my employer had conducted two years earlier. I thought that she would likely recognized me and I was not competing in a Halloween costume contest.

Q: Don't you worry that your voice gives you away when you are out crossdressed in public?

A: My voice has never been an issue as far as passing as a woman is concerned. (By the way, my voice is not deep and I am soft-spoken even in male mode. In female mode, I just crank the softness up a few notches and hope for the best.) Then, I turned the question around and asked the class, "If you did not know I was a crossdressed male, do you think my voice would give me away?" Three or four students answered, "No."

Q: What is your favorite crossdressing film?

A: Just Like A Woman, a British film that represents the most honest portrayal of a crossdressing heterosexual male I have ever seen. Although the film had a typical sappy Hollywood ending, I found the film valuable because I could relate closely to the crossdressing character.

The highlight of the day was during the first class. After we broke into two groups and the Q&A was concentrated on me, a female student asked about my nails.

Q: Why do you have your nails done only to go out once or twice a month?

A: I wear pre-glued, stick-on nails that take about 5 minutes to apply.

That led to a comment from another female student about how good I looked for my age. Immediately, another female jumped in and said how well I was put together. After that comment, nearly all the females started talking at once, commenting about how nice I looked. I blushed with embarrassment and thanked them for their compliments. That Kodak moment ended abruptly as the professor entered the classroom with the late M in tow, but I was basking in the glory of that moment for the rest of the day and even now as I write this I feel very pleased.

By the way, I wore my black wool suit yesterday. The jacket has three quarter sleeves, which are more like half sleeves on me. Under the jacket is a matching sleeveless knee-length A-line dress. I also wore off-black pantyhose, silver jewelry, and my sexy black high heel pumps. I looked very much like a business woman visiting the university.

I have never worn those shoes for an extended period of time, so I was unsure how comfortable they would be. So, I brought along another pair of shoes that I knew were comfortable and all-day wearable. Lucky I did because by the end of the first class, my feet hurt, so I switched shoes and was more comfortable the rest of the day.

We did not eat out after the classes like we normally do because D had to attend an evening class she is taking at another local university, so we ate in the student union.

All in all, it was another great day out en femme and I was sorry it had to end!