Are Hormones the Culprit?

Years ago, I did outreach with three transsexual women for a Human Sexuality class at the University of St. Joseph in West Hartford. We each gave a short biography and then took questions from the class.

It was a large class, all female with approximately 10% asking questions. The question and answer session lasted 90 minutes. I don’t recall any unique questions coming my way, but during the session, I discovered a new possible reason for my desire to crossdress: hormones.

The question that led to this had something to do with what changes the transsexuals experienced after taking hormones. One transwoman mentioned that before taking hormones, viewing a movie like Love Story had no effect, but after taking hormones, she cried like a baby viewing such a film. The other two transwomen agreed that they experienced the same change.

In response, I said that I never took hormones, but all my life, I cried viewing a movie like Love Story. 

The professor suggested that perhaps I should be tested by an endocrinologist. I assumed he was inferring that maybe I had an imbalance of hormones, i.e., too many female hormones and/or not enough male hormones. If that is true then it might explain other things… like my feminine breasts and my feminine traits.

Since puberty, my breasts have resembled a female’s breasts rather than a male’s and are able to nearly fill a B cup. 

And since forever, I have had feminine mannerisms. 

I never affected feminine mannerisms; they are natural to me. My most prominent feminine mannerisms are the way I talked and gestured.

I am very soft-spoken. I use words and phrases in ways that are typically female. And when I talk, I gesture with my hands in a very feminine manner often touching the other person I am conversing with. (That last one really freaks me out when I am in boy mode and touch somebody. I do it unconsciously and after I do it, I worry about a negative reaction from the other person, but so far I have been lucky and no one has called me on it.)

I never saw an endocrinologist, so I don’t know the truth about my hormones. But it would not surprise me that they are naturally balanced in a feminine way.

That’s not to say that some nurturing was not responsible, too. My mother raised me, while my father was absent much of the time while I was growing up (Dad worked two jobs and as much overtime as possible to make ends meet). Lacking a male model, I took after my mother in a lot of ways. So both nurture and nature may have come into play. 

 

Wearing Venus

Jeffrey Carlson (right) femulating on television’s All My Children.

Someday Funnies: Watch the Birdie

Wearing Bebe

Colin Baker

Someday Funnies: Mother of the Model

 

Source: Rue La La

Jim Bailey femulating in the 1987 film Penitentiary III.
You can view the film on YouTube.

Stana Status

Had Physical Therapy today. Therapist says I am doing very good and I can stop using the walker and use a cane instead. She added that by next week, I probably won’t even need the cane!

To shave or not to shave, fleece-lined tights may be the answer

By Paula Gaikowski

Wearing double hose

Shaving my legs was a milestone and rite of passage on my transgender journey. There has been nothing more liberating and cathartic than looking down and seeing a pair of women’s legs surface after shaving for the first time.

However, that wasn’t always possible. I used to worry about what people would say in the summertime if I had shaved my legs. That was an unfounded concern; nobody noticed and if they did, it’s not really any of their business. 

Typically, I trimmed my leg hair with clippers and then wear nude color opaque dance tights and wear black pantyhose over them. It worked fine but is very thick and also very warm in the summer.

So I understand the issue and the other day noticed the perfect solution. Ladies in Europe needed a solution to wearing skirts in their frigid winters. Transparent fleece-lined tights are thick fleece lined tights that look like you are wearing black sheer hose. They come in extra heavy and warm, but also in thinner styles.

They can be ordered from a variety of sources on the web, however, it seems black is the most common color with other options being coffee and gray. The product is popular in Asia so many of the vendors are located there. I did find this website offering plus size and tall sizes

Nothing can make you feel more feminine than freshly shaved legs and a new pair of your favorite sheer stockings. However, if it’s cold outside or if you can’t shave, perhaps this will help you get out and about and let that girl loose.

Wearing Saylor

Sailors femulating aboard S.S. Caronia, circa 1955

Stana Status

I had my first physical therapy session at home yesterday and the therapist said I was making good progress. 

I am still surprised about the level of pain I am enduring... not much at all and certainly much less than I expected. 

Again, I want to thank you all for the positive thoughts you have been sending my way.

Someday Funnies: Happy Groundhog Day!

Wearing New York & Company (on Stana’s Wish List)

Milton Berle femulating with other femulators in a 1995 episode of television’s Roseanne.

the existence of this “human” disgusts me

Twice-impeached former president Trump vows to ban healthcare for trans kids and “consequences” for LGBTQ-friendly teachers

The Dunce thinks the “radical Left” invented trans people a few years ago.

Read all about it on lgbtqnation.com.

First Bra & All-in-One

By Sara

Remember them well.

That year 1965, the fall Junior High October Fest included a Womanless Wedding, and I drew the Mother of the Bride role.

When I brought home the permission slip from my Speech Class Teacher (a lesbians Dream), both my mother and grandmother said if I did it then had to "train" for it.

Thus began a several week dive into Womanhood, using many of their clothes from the fifties, A Time of Floating Heaven, six weeks of coming home dressing and being dressed, taught to act and look like a Lady. Complete with heels after Grand went to visit her sister who had a huge Victorian home that served as the Families (13 kids) museum of things including clothes that went back to circa 1880 fashions, were shoes (heels) to fit were brought back.

The Twenties garb would be tried on and enjoyed that year's CHRISTMAS family get together the youngest of my Grands sisters was one of those flappers in her twenties in the 20s.

Mother's Girlfriend provided the wigs and makeup with several trips to her home salon.

That night was one of the best I ever had at that school.

One of the things Grand brought back was a 1930/40s floor length silk peignoir set, loved that with the bra panties and garter belt of the era. 

After the night festival was over ... They still said that I could use the pretty clothes, mom even gave me one of her 50s bullet bras a forties girdle, and a waist nipper to keep and use as my own as part of my Christmas Gift.  That year I asked Grand what mom Wanted, she took me down to Miller & Rhodes Department store where we went thru the Nightgown assortment finally found what Mom would like a Peignoir Set. Grandmother also found one she fancied, but left it on the Rack, there was a set that I came back to look at a couple of Times. Grand said do you really like that one, very embarrassed I said yes and she forced me to go and check out the Christmas gift purchase with several pairs of hose, one of my Normal Christmas items for Mom. The Clerk was one of Grands close Church friends, so even tho embarrassed I could not run, had to stay as they visited..... Thru several other lady customers.

The Next week, I went after school to get nightgown set that Grand liked, her friend was very nice knowing who it was for, and told me that just after Christmas the set that I had looked at a dozen Times so far would be on sale. Smirks. At Christmas three Peignoir sets we're traded around. Including another from the past given to me. Loved Vintage ever Since.

The day After Christmas, Grand went by bus to her sister's and mom had to work to cover for a Friend so it was Sunday when we went for the normal two weeks with the extended Family. I took a chunk of my Christmas money and bought the new peignoir on Saturday, I fancied firm grands friend, who told me that I ln two weeks a ton of special clothes would be gathered in that central store and to come back & check. Smirks again NICELY.

At the Victorian home, the next Day I was given a choice of two sets of pretty to wear, and the days & nightwear, were very nice. It was not till 1969 when my Aunt passed and my Grandma and I spent three months that summer going through that home from top to Bottom getting it ready for the 10 hour auction to liquidate the Estate after portions were divided. That's when I found out that my Great Aunt's Husband who served in Europe in WW1 (6'0') was also into dressing pretty, his collection of heeled shoes, only fit one person in the family ... me.

That January after going to the M&R sale and buying several underwear sets with dirt cheap hose sets 5¢, my first bra purchases, the next Day I went to the Leggetts Department store three doors down the next block and bought two bras two girdles and my first All-in-One, (Playtex 18 hour long torso brief 42B) (for the normal price of the All-in-One) I had stolen try ons of several female family members long one piece foundations over the year. so I knew what would fit. RATHER embarrassed still, took several years to get over that.

The Clerk asked if the sizes where alright and would fit, I stammered a little and heard over my shoulder a Question what sizes are they, a listing of them was read out, when I turned around my Grandmother's friend was standing there, the clerk and her were going out to eat..... She said yes those should work if you like the designs.

Mortified....

Two years later our family doctor, a woman who got into Med School In 1945, WW2 did provide more than Rosie the Riveter! Told

Mom & Grand that they should not let me dress, so off went the trousseau, and in future years purging. Such is life...

Wearing New York & Company

“Soldiers” femulating in the 1943 film This is the Army.
You can view this femulating-rich film on YouTube.

Breaking News!

I’m home with a new knee. Two hours of surgery Monday morning – they had me up and walking around Monday evening. Have a cane and walker for assistance if need be.

So far, there has been very little pain from the surgery. That is very surprising considering some of the horror stories I heard about knee replacement surgery. But who knows, the worst may still be in the future (hope not). 

Thank you all for the positive thoughts. I am sure they helped and I know that they helped me mentally.

And so it goes. 

Someday Funnies

Wearing BCBGeneration

British prisoners of war femulating on stage in a German prison camp during World War I.

Shopping Hacks

By Paula Gaikowski

Finding the right dress, shoes or foundation garment is always a challenge for a woman. For femulators the task can be even more daunting. So many of us have gone shopping to buy a “gift” for our wife or girlfriend to find it not fit. Some of us have overcome the hurdle of fearfulness and come out honestly with sales associates and have found it to be liberating. 

So many girls are embarrassed or fearful about going into a store and buying women’s clothing. Let’s start with a question, what you are doing? Answer: You’re buying women’s clothes for yourself. Now that may be atypical, but you certainly aren’t alone. Sales associates I’ve spoken with typically help two to three crossdressers a week.

I always enjoyed the affirmation that I received from sales associates. Most seem fascinated by my transgender story. They seem to share my excitement and were interested in helping me. There’s this peculiar giddiness that takes place. My guess is that finally “a male” sees what it’s like to wear a bra, heels and pantyhose for 10 hours or perhaps it’s the satisfaction one feels when you win someone over to your point of view?

When you’re shopping in drab, I recommend that you dress nicely. Wear clean, pressed clothes; be clean-shaven and smile. Don’t show up to try on dresses in dirty work clothes. If I am in drab, I like to wear an almost androgynous look, a black knit top and black or khaki pants. You want to depict a positive image. It helps if the likeness they see is a nice man verses, “This guy looks creepy.” 

Sales associates today are familiar with transgender people. They are typically informed and probably have friends who are LGBT. They often are the most enthusiastic and even seem to embrace the diversion we present to them. Smile, be polite and don’t waste their time if you are not going to buy anything. 

Remember you are not the first femulator in the store. They want your business and want to help you. If you’re worried about being recognized, find a store away from home.

However, even with shopping in today’s brick and mortar stores, it can be difficult to find the more specialty items that we need. Online shopping was quick to fill the gap for femulators, there are all sorts of sites thar caterer to our needs.

The big problem many of us have is privacy. Many of us are in the closet, and don’t want our wives, girlfriends or parents knowing about the new breast forms and hip pads we just ordered.

My wife and I have a don’t ask, don’t tell agreement going; she knows that the small closet in my office has “that stuff” in it. So I like to keep my purchases under the radar.

I’ve found that Amazon has everything you need to put that great look together. If you find something on another site, search the item on Amazon and you will almost always find it.

Why I am so keen on Amazon? Ordering here lets me keep it private. Here’s how I do it: I have a separate Amazon account under my female name and I use Amazon gift cards that can be purchased at most major drug stores, grocery and Walmart’s in denominations up $100. Just a side note I started receiving Amazon gift cards at work as Christmas gifts from management and didn’t know what do with them until a pair of cute shoes caught my eye.

I used the gift card and then have them shipped to an Amazon locker nearby. Just type in your ZIP code and a location nearby will be shown. The lockers look like mailboxes in a post office. You’ll be emailed a locker number and code to enter and then Oh là là! your new breast forms and maid’s uniform and no one is the wiser!

Wearing A.L.C.

William Reynolds femulating in the 1951 film No Questions Asked.

Someday Funnies: We wear panties!

Wearing Eloquii

Bryan Marshall, professional femulator, circa 1960

Someday Funnies: Ginny is my friend!

Wearing Bebe

Antti Vare femulating in a 2018 episode of Finnish television’s Uusi päivä (A New Day). Although this is not a new femulation (I first mentioned it here in 2020), a lot of people are discovering it for the first time via recently posted video clips on YouTube.