Someday Funnies

Hats off to Velma for providing the inspiration for this funny!

Wearing Self Portrait

Vinicio Diamanti femulating in the 1984 Italian film Delitto al Blue Gay AKA Cop in Drag.

What a case!

Years ago, the cosmetics began accumulating as my femulating progressed, so I bought a small Caboodle makeup case* to store my makeup.

I became an Avon lady and my makeup collection expanded rapidly. Soon I outgrew the small Caboodle case, so I purchased a larger Caboodle makeup case.

That worked for awhile, but I eventually outgrew the larger Caboodle case, too. Since my local boutique (Walmart) did not offer a larger makeup case, I got the bright idea of buying the biggest tackle box* my boutique sold and use it to store my makeup. 

The tackle box did the trick for 10 years. I still accumulated makeup, but whenever the contents of the tackle box approached maximum capacity, I got rid of stuff I wasn’t using, as well as old makeup that was no longer healthy to use (see below).

The tackle box worked out great, but it was too manly. Pandemicly-bored last summer, I decided to buy something more appropriate, i.e., more girly, so I purchased a makeup train case*. 

The train case is big – a piece of luggage, more than double the capacity of the tackle box! 

All was well until I did my makeup Friday morning in preparation for a Zoom meeting. The train case was overflowing. I could not find stuff that I knew was buried somewhere in the case and I had a hard time closing the case when I was done. So after Zooming, I cleaned house again and reorganized what I did not throw out. 

The Zoom meeting was for my ham radio group’s preparations for our annual conference later this month. Naturally, I did my face and hair because they would be visible during the Zoom meeting. I could have worn a woman’s top to complete the picture, but not me. Instead, I went all out and wore a new dress over a full array of foundation garments, thigh high hosiery, jewelry and even high heels (see photo).

Overdressing is my middle name!

* An Amazon Associate link

Source: Rue La La

Chris Lemmon and Philip Charles MacKenzie join Alison La Placa as Vegas showgirls in a 1989 episode of television's Open House. I saw this episode when it was originally televised and in my opinion, Chris looks a lot better than the photo's depiction. In fact, he looked so hot that his TV wife got very excited about his appearance, started making out with him/her and suggested that he dress as a woman more often!

Someday Funnies

Wearing JustFab

Grayson Perry

What’s in your lingerie drawer?

Ladies like us wear some kind of foundation garment to help us achieve a more feminine figure. We have a lot of choices including various types of girdles, cinchers, corsets, bras, all-in-ones, shapers, as well as garments that have padding to give us the girlish hips and/or butts that we lack and desire.

During six decades of femulating, I have tried just about all of the shapewear options. Some were better than others and the best was an all-in-one I purchased in the fall of 1974. 

I was quite closeted back then and used the Halloween girl costume excuse for most of my in-person purchases. With Halloween approaching, I decided to purchase an all-in-one using that excuse. 

I visited an old school lingerie store to make my purchase. A middle-aged woman greeted me as I entered the store. I told her my Halloween story and added that I wanted an all-in-one.

That probably tipped my hand immediately; how many guys know what’s an “all-in-one.”

The woman used a tape measure to take my measurements. Then she went in the back room and returned a few minutes later with two all-in-ones.

“Take these to the dressing room, try them on and call me so I can see if they fit properly.”

I did not expect such a hands-on sale, but was glad to have it. I quickly stripped down to my briefs, zipped myself into my all-in-one and called for the saleswoman and by doing so, I tipped my hand again.

“Wow - that was quick,” she remarked. (I assumed that her other male customers were not as fast as I when trying on their “first” all-in-one.)

She checked me out and gushed over my girlish figure. I tipped my hand again when my face turned beet red in embarrassment. I could not pay for my purchase fast enough and get out Dodge.

I loved that all-in-one. It was constructed with spring-like metal stays and it gave me a figure like no other. It was my go-to foundation garment for years; I repaired it as needed and I wore it until it fell apart. I wish I could find one like it today! But as far as I know, no one produces anything like it. 

I approximate that all-in-one with a Rago style 2202* longline bra combined with a Rago style 6207* high-waist long-leg panty girdle. I add butt padding to pad my butt.

So what’s in your lingerie drawer? What is your favorite shapewear and why? Let me know by commenting below or via email. 

* An Amazon Associate link

Wearing Boston Proper

Esme Percy femulating in the 1930 Hitchcock film Murder!

Someday Funnies

Wearing Venus

James Spader femulating on television's Boston Legal.

Maid to Order

By Gina V

The trans spectrum is a broad one that ranges from hairy panty wearers to full-time post-op transsexuals with the Heinz 57 varieties in between being the costume fetishist. Of course, some could justifiably point out that if a man wears any garment intended for the opposite biological gender, then that is a form of fetishism in itself (if a woman does likewise, it is called “fashion”). However, I am referring to the kind of outfits that would be considered kinky even if real women wore them, i.e. leather dominatrix, rubber doll, schoolgirl, non-religious nun, etc.

Such practitioners usually lurk behind closed doors to indulge their (mostly sexual) interests, although I did once witness one dressed in full-blown “little girl” get-up hanging out in a gay bar. As such, they often pay for private amenities in order to prance about or whatever in their chosen form of expression. 

When I first started lodging with my ex-landlord, he was running a (cross) dressing service with several outfits of that nature available for his clientele. At that point, I still felt like Alice in Wonderland as a result of recently coming out of the closet, although ironically, that was not an available costume. 

Although I have had my fetishistic dressing fantasies over the years (who hasn’t?), to be honest, that kind of thing is not usually my cup of tea. I have always been more at home with the traditional housewife look as long as I can remember, although I suppose that would be considered a fetish in itself in a world where women wear the trousers in more ways than one?

However, I thought one day, after my landlord had gone out for the afternoon that it would be a jolly jape to dress up in an outfit. And once I had done so, I locked the front door so when he returned, he had no choice but to wait until it was opened for him and be greeted by a curtseying housemaid! 

Once he got over the surprise, he grabbed his camera and snapped away while I posed coquettishly and pretended to do various household chores. So a fun time was had by all, but it never went any further than that.

However, when editing the photos for this article, I couldn’t help but notice that I seemed to be quite comfortable in the role. So maybe if I’m on my uppers in the future, that might be an occupation worth considering?

Wearing Saks Fifth Avenue

Yet Another French Maid

Someday Funnies

Wearing Alice + Olivia

Femulating and gender role reversal in the “Boys Boys Boys/Fashion” music video.
You can view this video on YouTube.

Stolen Car

By Paula Gaikowski

I’m from New Jersey, and of course a big Bruce Springsteen fan. I remember friends coming home from trips “down the shore” and playing the 8-track tape “Greetings from Asbury Park.” I was hooked and continued to be to this day. 

The other night alone with my earbuds, a bottle of Chablis, and about 100 Bruce songs I sat out on the deck and listened alone with my thoughts.

Back in 2008 as many of you know from reading my posts, I came out of my shell and started going out in public as Paula. Business trips took me all over the country and world. I was able to experience so many of my dreams as a woman. I attended dinners, classes, concerts, I shopped and socialized. I was able to spend 3-day weekends living as a woman. I began therapy and was able to talk about and come to terms with my transgender nature.  A bad back in 2018 grounded me and then the pandemic grounded us all.

A little know Springsteen song “Stolen Car” resonated with me the other night. It’s about someone who’s stuck in life with an unsolvable problem.  If you’re brave enough, pour yourself a cold one, grab your earbuds, and I’ll let you peek inside my head. Click the title for a video to the song.

“Stolen Car”

I met a little girl and I settled down
In a little house out on the edge of town
We got married, and swore we'd never part
Then little by little we drifted from each other's hearts

(Getting married will make this all go away, it will cure me.)

At first I thought it was just restlessness
That would fade as time went by and our love grew deep
In the end it was something more I guess
That tore us apart and made us weep

(In the end it was something more, my being transgender that caused us pain)

And I'm driving a stolen car
Down on Eldridge Avenue
Each night I wait to get caught
But I never do

(I go out as a woman, everywhere, and I become purposely careless, I’m waiting to get caught, for drastic and seismic change, but it doesn’t happen)

And I'm driving a stolen car
On a pitch black night

(I’m stealing away as a woman, taking something, I want but they say I can’t have, I am isolated with my secret, in the pitch-black night.)

And I'm telling myself I'm gonna be alright

(Someday, I’ll be a woman I’ll be alright I tell myself)

But I ride by night and I travel in fear

(I do this all-in secret, metaphorically at night, and I live everyday fearing it’s going to come crashing down.)

That in this darkness I will disappear.

(“I” being Paula my true self will be lost)

Wearing Bebe

James Brown, Nigerian femulator

Someday Funnies

Wearing Venus

Comely Todd Matlock turned heads femulating at Mt. Enterprise (Texas) High School in 1981.
Another sample from our Yearbooks Collection

Yearbooks and More

I hope you are enjoying the revived flickr Yearbooks Collection. There have been nearly one million views since the Collection went live on Monday, so it seems to be a big hit.

Since I have unlimited storage, I also posted some personal photos on flickr. They are under three categories: Stana Cosmopolite, Stana Fashionista and Stana Office Girl. I will probably add more categories in the near future.

You can access all the contents of the Femulate Image Library using the links in the blog’s sidebar (under the heading Flickr Image Library.)

Wearing Joie

Lovely Phillip Sacks struts his stuff at Downey (California) High School.
A sample from our flickr Yearbooks Collection.