To Be Determined

Last week, I was occupied doing taxes for my daughter, her business, my sister, my wife and myself. I filed everything electronically over the weekend and I put TurboTax away until next winter.

I was also occupied with a new radio that I acquired ten days ago, learning all its functions and options and writing a review in the process. This is still on-going.

In the midst of tax filing and radio reviewing, I decided to forgo blogging here until I filed the taxes. As a result, this is my first post since last Wednesday.

I actually considered giving up this blog forever. 

I put my heart and soul into Femulate and it is time-consuming. I think the quality of this blog is evidence of that. In return, I receive some complimentary comments and e-mails (not to mention disparaging comments and e-mails from trolls and trans-harpies). 

I recently deleted the Adsense ads because I grew tired of Adsense trying to dictate the contents of this blog. Now I am free to post whatever I want, but I had to give up the monthly check from Adsense to gain that freedom.  

My attempt to compensate the loss of Adsense income with my Coffee Break! gadget has been a bust. I won't mention the amount I received, but I do thank the two readers who did contribute.

My life would be easier if I gave up this blog forever, but I decided not to abandon my faithful readers. I also would miss the writing, but not so much on a daily basis. (During the past 4079 days, I have written 4236 posts. Do the math and that's more than one post per day over 11 years and two months!)

So I decided to forgo blogging here on a daily basis. Rather, I will blog when I feel like it.

And so it goes.

Stuart Weitzman sandals (Source: ShopStyle)

Femulator Andrey Nagorny

You should have been a girl

"You should have been a girl!" is a statement my mother made to me a number of times while I was growing up. Usually, she made it after complementing my shapely girlish legs. On other occasions, when she mentioned that I walked like a girl (on my tip toes).

To compound my gender confusion, whenever she took my sister and I out on her weekly shopping trips, she insisted that I use the ladies' room when nature called. I don't recall if I stood or sat to pee, but I used the ladies' room until I was 10 or 11 years old.

Then there was my introduction to makeup.

I was probably between the ages of 6 and 9 and for a day or two, I got the notion that I wanted to be a circus clown when I grew up. I remember I was home alone with my mother and I covered my face with my mother's cold cream to simulate a clown's white face. What a mess!

I showed my handiwork to my mother and she volunteered to do a better job. She removed the cold cream and started anew applying various cosmetics to my face.

When she was done, I looked in the mirror and was shocked. Instead of looking like a clown, I looked like a girl. I still remember the bright red lipstick on my lips.

In retrospect, I am not sure if she realized what I was trying to do. I do not recall if I was clear about trying to be a clown. She may have thought I was trying to be a girl and acted accordingly.

I suspect that later, when I began exploring femininity, she would have been very willing to assist me, but I never asked for her help or revealed my desires even when she prompted me with, "Is there anything you want to tell me?"

In retrospect, I realize she knew (mothers always know) after finding my hidden stash of girly things and learning about my Halloween excursions en femme, but I was too closeted to tell her the truth that I really was a girl.

Wearing OPM Boutique

Steve Coogan femulates on British television in Pauline Calf's Wedding Video.

I am not a drag queen

I am not a drag queen!

After a local "GLBT" pride celebration, the local newspaper had no articles about the event, but it did publish one photo from the event, which it featured on the front page of the local news section of the paper.

Guess what the photo showed?

Gay couples with their children in tow? No.

Appropriately attired transpeople taking in the event? No.

Over-the-top drag queens preparing to perform a number from Hairspray? YES!!!

You seldom see the media showing appropriately attired transpeople. That would be boring. The media prefers to show drag queens.

I have friends, relatives, and acquaintances, who know that I crossdress, but have never seen me en femme. I am sure they have seen news reports about GLBT pride events and like the "report" in the local newspaper, they almost always feature flamboyant drag queens. So, I have no doubt that those friends, relatives, and acquaintances who have never seen me en femme think that when I crossdress, I dress like a drag queen, too, because that is all they know.

Source: Annette at A Vintage Splendor dot com

Professional femulator Michael Andrews in the 1983 film Murder Me, Murder You

Lavern Cummings RIP

In my opinion, Lavern Cummings was the most beautiful femulator of the 20th Century. And I was shocked to learn from Heather that Lavern died in Las Vegas after being hit by a car while trying to cross Charleston Boulevard in a crosswalk last week. The former Finocchio's star was 90 years old.

En femme, Lavern was absolutely gorgeous in a natural way as opposed to a drag queen way. Audiences were convinced that Lavern was female until he dropped his voice from soprano to baritone in the middle of a song.

There are countless images of Lavern on the Internet. Below are a few of my favorite.

God bless you, Paul Lavern Cummings.

Wearing Arafeel dress, H&M bag and Embis shoes (Source: Cookbook.nu)

Beautiful Lavern Cummings

Someday Funnies

Wearing Ann Taylor (Source: Ann Taylor)

Happy Easter!

Friday Freebies

Mom owned a Singer sewing machine and sewed beautiful dresses for her and my sister.

Often, I would peruse the dress patterns that were always lying around and wish that Mom would sew something for me. (She never did, although I never asked. In my heart, I think she would have if I had only asked.)

By watching Mom do it so many times, I learned how to use a needle and thread well enough to sew on a button and make minor repairs. I never got the hang of using a sewing machine, but once upon a time I did stitch together a red satin micro miniskirt from scraps of cloth that Mom had used for some other project.

Fast-forward 50 years and Diana alerted me that "the Vintage Patterns Wiki has released more than 83,500 patterns of pre 1992, out of print patterns for all to use.

"The browsable collection runs the gamut from Dynasty-inspired pussy bow power suits to Betty Draper-esque frocks featuring models in white gloves to an 1895 boys' Reefer Suit with fly-free short trousers."

You can read all about it here. Meanwhile, you will find me browsing the 1950s collection looking for a "new" Easter outfit!

Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)

Femulating in the 1960s

Joan Heartless

Connecticut Governor Malloy nominated Andrew McDonald to be chief justice in the state's supreme court. McDonald is openly gay.

On Tuesday, the state's senate voted against the nomination. All 18 Republican senators voted against the nomination, along with Democrat Joan Hartley of Waterbury, who has a long record of voting against LGBT rights.

Hartley is a DINO (Democrat In Name Only) and it came as no surprise that she joined the homophobic Republican senators in voting against McDonald.

In the past, heartless Hartley voted against bills legalizing civil unions in 2005, codifying the state Supreme Court’s ruling that legalized same-sex marriage in 2009, enacting anti-discrimination projections for transgender individuals in 2011 and allowing same-sex couples to adopt children in 2000.

Heartless Hartley is a Catholic and wears her religion on her sleeve, so I want to ask her, "How would Jesus have voted?"

Wearing Hudson dress, The Volon bag and Proenza Schouler shoes (Source: ShopBop)

Janek Traczyk femulates Nancy Sinatra on Polish television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.

One Liners

I am working for Uncle Sam this week wrestling with Turbotax.

When we were dating, I gifted my wife with a dress for Easter that she never wore.

I am a sucker for large cap wigs because they are rare and my head is so voluptuous.

Hyacinths I planted last summer are pushing up through the snow.

Slipping my nylon clad legs into a pair of high heel pumps never gets old.

On Saturday I planted green peas, sugar snap peas, arugula, kale, Bibb lettuce and cauliflower seeds in my Earth Boxes and covered them with clear plastic.

Raquel Welch Salsa in Golden Wheat is in the mail.

My Subaru needs to go to the dealer for the airbag recall.

Even though I have been a computer nerd since the 1970's, I still don't get Twitter (#femulate).

I'd wear this!

Early 20th Century boy ballerinas.

Got Tuesday

Got Drag Dept.

Zoe informed me that Jim Parsons of The Big Bang Theory fame will appear in the film version of Matthew Lopez’s play The Legend of Georgia McBride. Parsons will play the role of Miss Tracy Mills, a veteran drag queen who coaches a broke young man in the art of performing, transforming him from a washed-up Elvis impersonator to a show-stopping drag queen. (Source: Variety)

Parsons is no stranger when it gets to getting girly. That is Jim en femme in the accompanying photo with Steven Weber attending a 2013 benefit in Los Angeles.

Got Links Dept.

Jan Brown suggested I add links to online videos of the Your Face Sounds Familiar femulations that I post in the Femulator slot below. Videos of the femulations do not always exist, but I have embraced Jan's suggestion and have added links when I find them, as I did with todays Femulator, the amazing Janek Traczyk.

(Source: moldesdicasmoda.com)

Janek Traczyk femulates Slawa Przybylska on Polish television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.

The Engaging Miss Eng'g

The Miss Eng'g (Engineering) womanless beauty pageant at the College of Engineering, University of Philippines-Diliman is one of the best, if not the best womanless pageant conducted at an educational institute or anywhere else for that matter. This year's edition of the pageant was held on March 9 and the Miss Engineering Facebook page has hundreds of photographs documenting the pageant including an album of spectacular evening gown photos (samples above and below).

Wow!

In the 1969, I was a student in the UConn School of Engineering and I cannot imagine my fellow engineering students participating in anything like this. Me, yes, but not the other students in my school!

(Thank you Aunty Marlena for the heads-up about the pageant!)

Wearing Zuhair Murad

A contestant struts his stuff in the evening gown competition of the 2018 Miss Eng'g womanless beauty pageant.

Shapewear Sale Alert!

I don't know if Lady Grace is going out if business or just having a clearance sale, but they are now offering huge discounts on shapewear and other unmentionables. The sizes and colors are limited, but I still managed to find seven assorted items to purchase for $78 total!