A “Charming” Night at Derby and Dice

By Jeanine Williams

Due to recent events, I am in no frame of mind to write original posts for this blog. However, my sister femulator from Minnesota, Jeanine Williams, kindly offered to step in and write a post for the blog and here it is!

Last month I had the opportunity to attend a fundraiser for the Duluth (MN) Playhouse held at the Northland Country Club. I’ve attended events before at the Underground and have had lots of fun and met some wonderful people (as shown in the photos!) Backtracking a bit, in March I won an essay contest that was held in tandem with the Love, Loss and What I Wore play and the first place prize included 2 tickets to the show, 2 drinks, a $25 gift certificate to Art in the Alley, a local eclectic clothing store and a piece of custom made jewelry. I donated it all except one ticket to the Saturday night performance. Here is the link to that if you’re interested.

This became the second time I attended an event at the Northland CC – a few weeks prior I went to a fundraiser for a local Shakespeare theatre group, and sat with a group of 4 other women who were great company and readily accepted me as one of their own.

It was a masquerade event and I wore a new navy blue wrap dress by Chaps, simple but elegant. This was one of 2 Chaps dresses I had ordered online and I’m quite happy with both of them. I wore a blue and black color blocked dress to the Derby and Dice fundraiser, and here are some photos for that as well. I did a much better job on my make-up this time but Charm (the horse) was not that impressed at first, although we did become friends after this photo was taken.

After checking in and collecting my “funny money” to gamble with I wandered around a bit and then met Linda and Susie who were the dealers at the craps table. I’ve never played craps before but they taught me and before I knew it I became the “hot” roller and everyone was making $ before I eventually crapped out. Here’s a picture of me with Linda and Susie. All the girls were asked to wear a hat, mine is simple (but really cute), and many were quite elaborate like those found on the infield at the Kentucky Derby, and of course mint juleps were also being served.

Linda and I later went upstairs to the “members only” club and bar and engaged in some great girl talk.

After that I tried my hand at Blackjack but even when I managed to draw 21 the dealer matched it every time and I “lost” quite a bit before winning once. I also bid on a few items at the silent auction and did score once on a resort hotel nights stay for only $60.

After Derby and Dice ended I met up with another woman and a male friend for drinks at my favorite bar, the Blackwater Lounge in downtown Duluth. We chatted ‘til the staff turned up the lights to let us know they were closing. Once again I had a great night out as a woman and was treated with nothing but respect and dignity, making several new friends along the way. Finally, here’s another pic modeling the Chaps dress and another wearing my favorite panne blue velvet dress that I wore a month before to the fundraiser for Duluth Pride with my friend Sue.

Wearing Ann Taylor

Professional French femulator Fifi Pervenche, circa 1960

June 21, 2015

If male-to-female transgenders are called "transwomen," should male-to-female transgender fathers be called "transmothers" ?

Make sure to give your Dad a Father's Day she will remember.

Instead of buying Dad a new tie or a bottle of wine, get her a gift certificate from Victoria's Secret or a bottle of Chanel No. 5. To make Dad's day complete, tell Dad to wear her most feminine outfit, then take Dad out to her favorite restaurant. It will be a Father's Day that she will never forget.

- Fathers and Sons -

- Fathers and Daughters -

- “Dad’s in Drag” Contests -

- Femulating Fathers Funnies -

Dressing to Please Yourself

Due to recent events, I am in no frame of mind to write original posts for this blog, so I plan to run "The Best of Femulate" until I feel better. Today's "Best" is from October 2011 and discusses how to dress ― appropriately or otherwise.

The topic of Ginger Burr's blog this week is "Please Yourself First" when it comes to deciding what to wear and dealing with people who criticize your wardrobe decisions. 

"Generally speaking when you feel fabulous about how you look (even if others do not totally agree), their unsolicited comments have much less charge to them."

Her words are applicable to cisgender and trangender woman alike and I highly recommend reading them.

Unless there is something technically wrong with what I am wearing, like a run in my pantyhose, I ignore negative comments about my choice of dress. If I am happy with the way I look, that is what matters to me and I will be comfortable in my skins.

When I went to the mall the other day, I thought I was one of the best dressed customers, male or female, in the mall (at least in comparison to the ones I saw). 

Do you realize how empowering that is?

You just want to strut your stuff. And if someone checks you out, you know why ― because your dress is attractive, you stand out in the crowd. People are thinking that she or he really knows how to put herself or himself together.

Now I don't recommend wearing an evening gown and tiara to go shopping at the mall. Instead, dress a little over the top, but in a way that is plausible. For example, my mallwear was plausible for a businesswoman shopping or working at the mall. And that's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Which reminds me, when I was wandering through the racks in Nordstrom on an outing earlier this year, a woman came up to me and asked me a question because she thought I was a Nordstrom saleswoman.

And so it goes.

Wearing Boston Proper

Womanless beauty pageant contestant number 6

my amazing Amazon evening

Due to recent events, I am in no frame of mind to write original posts for this blog, so I plan to run "The Best of Femulate" until I recover. Today's "Best" is from December 2009 and recollects my first visit to a casino as a woman.

Yesterday, I had a spectacular outing en femme.

I was dressed and out the door at 4 PM and drove to Middletown to dine with friends at an upscale restaurant. I was the first to arrive. A waitress seated me at our table and I ordered a mango martini.

My friends arrived a few minutes later: Maryann and Carole, the couple I have done outreach with so many times in the past, Robin and Arline, another couple who I have known for years, and one of my oldest trans friends, Diana.

Surprise! After Diana arrived, she announced that she was buying my dinner (in appreciation for some editing I have done for her recently). Thank-you, Diana.

The dinner and dinner conversation were excellent.

I told everyone that I was undecided about going to the Mohegan Sun casino after dinner. I was a little nervous about going by myself and needed a little encouragement.

Robin provided the encouragement. She has been to the casino numerous times en femme and said that I would have "no problem."

So I departed around 7:15 PM and I drove 40 minutes to the casino. I never use valet parking, but it was so cold last night, I did not feel like walking through a damp, cold, and dimly-lit parking garage, so I pulled up to the entrance of the casino, gave the valet my car keys, and sashayed inside. I checked my coat and was ready to have some fun at the "Sun."

I immediately noticed that I was one of the few women in the casino wearing a dress (and a very nice dress at that). As a result, I caught men and women eyeing me at various times during my visit.

You can never be sure if they are looking because you are looking good or because you are looking trans, however, I do know I passed some of the time because while I was walking through the casino shopping mall, a guy who walked by me in the opposite direction remarked to his friends, "Did you see the Amazon?"

Furthermore, I did not hear a discouraging word during my visit. So, on the passing front, it was a very encouraging night.

The casino does not permit photography inside the casino, so I walked through the shopping mall looking for a place to take a photo and for someone to take the photo. When I found a photogenic spot, I asked the first friendly-looking woman I saw to take my photo and she happily agreed to do so (the result accompanies this blog posting).

Another reason I was in the mall was to check out the night club and get in some dancing, but the night club was not very busy. I imagine that on a Wednesday nights, the joint is usually not hopping, so I skipped the nightclub.

On the gambling front, I decided to gamble $100, no more, no less. I only play 25-cent slot machines, so I figured that $100 should be more than adequate for my two- or three-hour visit.

Immediately, I won $50, so I played with the casino's money for awhile, but I eventually fed their $50 and my $50 into their machines.

I had made up my mind to leave the casino at 10:30 PM. I was about $20 into my second $50 at about 10:15, when I sat down at what I figured would be the last slot machine of the evening. On my fifth or sixth spin, I won $150. Perfect timing. I collected my winnings, collected my coat and the valet collected my car with me tipping the coat check man and valet generously.

Last night was the first time I ever accessorized with a scarf. The scarf I wore was one of my deceased Mother's scarves; I felt that she was with me throughout the evening and may have brought me some luck at the slot machines. Thank-you, Mom!

Wearing Trina Turk

Actor Caleb Goh in the 1998 Singaporian film That's The Way I Like It

How High?

A Woman in Heels

What if there were a magic number you could measure that would tell you exactly what high heel height would be your most comfortable to wear? What if science could finally tell you why your coworker could wear her 4 inch Manolos all day at work like nothing, while you can barely muster a kitten heel? According to an article I rediscovered buried in my browser bookmarks, there is!...

Theory:

Depending on many factors including the shape of your foot, flexibility, arch height, etc., your foot has a natural incline while in a state of rest, that if measured, can indicate which shoe heel height would feel most natural and comfortable.

― 

You can read the rest of this intriguing article at Alterations Needed.

For what it's worth, your curious blogger performed the test and accordingly, my high heel height should be 6 inches!!!!!!

Wearing Nine West

Actors performing Shakespeare's The Merchant of Venice on the Tokyo stage in 2011

How Do You Know You're A Woman?

A Woman

By Ann Friedman

A few years ago, a colleague of mine asked me, “How do you know you’re a woman?” I had no idea how to answer her. I was enough of a feminist to know I couldn’t just list things like, “I’ve been called a girl since birth. I get a period. I like wearing lipstick.” But it also seemed disingenuous to say that I felt most like a woman when I was making tough decisions at work or lifting something heavy. Ultimately, I decided, I “just know” that I’m a woman.

It’s no coincidence that the colleague who asked is transgender. Her point was to push a variety of women to answer a question that she’d been asked countless times.

You can read the rest of this excellent article at The Cut.

Wearing Torn

Edgar Mirjamsdotter's high school graduation outfit

Death in the Family

I watched a family member die Saturday afternoon.

Early Saturday afternoon, my wife got a call to get to the hospital as soon as possible because her sister was on her death bed.

My sister-in-law has had poor health as long as I have known her, but she is tough and has lived on despite all her health issues. However, her heart finally gave up early Saturday morning and they rushed her to the ICU where she was being kept alive by a variety of devices connected to her body.

Mid-afternoon, my sister-in-law's daughter decided to take her off life support. They disconnected her and for the next 15 minutes, we surrounded her bed watching her life end.