Transgender Lives Conference Next Saturday

The 9th annual Transgender Lives: The Intersection of Health and Law Conference is next Saturday, April 25 at the UConn Health Center in Farmington, Connecticut. Running from 8 AM to 5 PM, Fantasia Fair Friend Dallas Denny is the keynote speaker at 3;30 PM and yours truly will be co-presenting "Crossdressing in the Real World" with Jan Brown at 10:45 AM (the full schedule is here).

UCONN Health Center is exactly half way between Boston and New York City and is just off I-84 Exit 39.

I hope to see you there!

Wearing Eight Six

A dragkepnni celebration in Iceland, 2013

Throwback Thursday: His Hanes

Back in 1998, this pin-up girl artwork by Gil Elvgren inspired me to modify it in a femulating way and post it in my old blog nFem. I gave the girl a boy's haircut, modified her bra so that her bust appeared to be more boy-like and added the caption to parody the classic tagline from the Hanes' ads of the 1970s and 1980s.

The parody took on a life of its own and appeared on the Internet in places where girls like us hang out.

Also, my parody (or Elvgren's original) may have inspired a photographic version, which I found on Pinterest.

Always trying to improve things, I took another stab at the parody in 2004. I changed the femulator's haircut, thickened her eyebrows, inserted falsies, added the package of Hanes hosiery and the blurb below the tagline.

Always trying to improve things, I may revisit the parody in the near future.

10 Million and Counting

Earlier this week, the hit counter for this blog passed the 10 million mark! I thank you all for making that possible.

On a typical day, Femulate gets about 5,000 hits, but as I write this midday on Wednesday, the blog has gotten over 36,000 hits so far! That's about a week's worth of hits in half a day! What is going on?

Wearing Sally LaPointe (coat), J.W. Anderson (skirt) and Vince (blouse)

Walton Goggins in television's Sons of Anarchy.

Amazed and Jealous

Stana in 1976

I am always amazed (and jealous) to see all the young women posting their photos and stories at Reddit's Crossdressing.

"Amazed" because there are so many girls coming out and they all look amazing. "Jealous" because there were no resources like it when I was coming out as a young woman. (Girlfriends helping boyfriends with their makeup just blows my mind. Back when I was young, if I asked a girlfriend to help me with my makeup, she would have dumped me posthaste.)

I came out very slowly... so slowly that I am still coming out. Coming out, I was discouraged from every direction... not in so many words, but rather by society's general attitude toward girls like us.

My peers were treated like freaks and bozos and that discouraged me from getting on board the bus. It was easier to deny my true self and live a lie pretending to be a "man." Despite my denials, my femininity was so imbedded in me that I did not fit in well with other men because of my girlish characteristics and mannerisms.

Being a man was a bad fit, which became obvious to me as my occasional crossdressing fit so well and I finally accepted the fact that I was a woman all along.

If Reddit's Crossdressing or just the Internet existed when I was young, it probably would have accelerated all that, but it did not exist, so I did the best that I could.

Wearing Nicole Miller.

Patrick Swayze power-suited in the 1995 film To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar.

Power Suit

Yesterday, I wrote about the power of wearing a short skirt and high heels. In addition to wielding the power in a home improvement store, I discovered that combination works in other places, too.

When I spent a long weekend in Manhattan, a short hemline and heels sure came in handy when hailing a taxi cab. I never failed to nab the first cab I hailed when I was wearing my "power suit."

My power suit is not necessarily a jacket and matching pencil skirt. My power suit consists of a skirt or dress with a hem at or above the knee and high heel pumps with a three-inch or higher heel.

My power suit is more than adequate to gain the upper hand over the male sex. Dressed so, I can wrap a male around my little finger. Even males who are aware of my birth gender have fallen under my power.

It is so easy! I don't even have to think about unleashing the power because males usually succumb to it automatically.

Women are the stronger sex, but we play along that we are the fairer sex because along with our uniforms, it is part of our strategy to have our way with the real weaker sex.

Wearing Ann Taylor.

Actor Steven Weber in television's The Comedians (2015)

(Thank you, Zoe)

Shopping for Hardware in Software

My shopping for hardware wear!

A number of girls wondered about the dress Christina Marie wore in her Favorite Photos post last week.

I wondered too, so I asked her and she revealed that she bought it at JCPenney “a few years back.  Just couldn’t resist buying it after trying it on.”

Here is a link to the dress, but bad news girls, it is sold out.

Christina Marie added, “So much easier to shop for things when in girl mode, huh?”

Yes, indeed!

You have your shapewear strategically in place, so you know how the item will fit when you try it on and you are in makeup and wearing a do, so you know how the item will look on madam.

Yes, shopping in girl mode is so much easier… even if you are not shopping for girly things!

Which reminds me of the time I visited a Lowe's home improvement store in girl mode to get a replacement part for a piece of plumbing that failed. I had no trepidation about going to Lowe's and I found my trip very revealing.

Whenever I go to Lowe's or Home Depot in boy mode, I have to find and ask a store employee when I need help. In girl mode, I had a male Lowe's employee practically at my beck and call without asking. 

When he saw me looking lost in the plumbing department, he asked what I needed and directed me to the exact location where the part was displayed. After I found what I needed, he came over and compared it to the old part I had brought along to make sure I got the right part.

That's the power of a short skirt and high heels!

Wearing Halston Heritage.

Actor Robert Sella in television's In Plain Sight (2012).

Sonia’s Favorite Photos (of Sonia!)

Dear Stana,

Your blog is such an amazing resource and I've been a follower for a long long time.

Your open invitation to send in a favorite photo with its story was much too tempting to pass up. I've been a crossdresser for as long as I can remember, but given my circumstances, I'd also have been in the closet for an equally long time. Neither did I have the makeup skills nor the opportunity to venture out into the world and test the waters. Perhaps I also wasn't ready and fully accepting of myself to muster up the courage to say, "This is me and I'm proud of it".

That changed in 2013. I'd come out to a friend many years ago, yet neither he nor I had ever discussed the topic. He is a makeup artist and also happens to be gay, although we all know that doesn't necessarily equal acceptance.

Come end-August 2013, we were chatting and in passing he mentioned in passing that he was going to a gay party. Taking a chance, I asked if I could tag along and not stopping there I asked if I could come dressed. We discussed it for a while and agreed that it would a terrific idea. Then began the excitement, of course, of putting together an outfit, accessories, and colors, all of which was immensely satisfying.

When the day arrived, I was very nervous and also very excited. Venturing into the unknown is what this was and something about that was thrilling. Needless to say the party was great and no one cared two hoots and I even got Ma'am'd a couple of times. Given that it was at night, I had the advantage of dim lighting to give me added comfort.

That was the day Sonia was truly born, one that I will never forget. Sadly, the only picture I have (the photo on top) isn't the clearest, but the smile on my face says it all, I think.

Sonia also celebrated her birthday a couple of weeks later, for the first time en femme (the photo below). Both events hold so much significance to me that I couldn't pick just one.

Hugs,

Sonia

My open invitation to post your favorite photo along with the story behind it and the reason it is your favorite photo still stands, so don't be shy, send me your fave foto. ― Stana

 

 

 

Wearing Nina Ricci.

 

 

 

Cecil Beaton

Eve’s Favorite Photos (of Eve!)

Stana!

Here are three photos of me at First Event in January in Boston. I wore the blue gown in the fashion show, definitely a "non-civilian" affair! The other pix are me in other outfits for different evenings at First Event.

I think the blue gown picture will always remind me of how happy, relaxed and confident I felt that night on the runway. Everyone there had a wonderful experience and were so supportive. It was my second time modeling and I can't wait to do it again. Roll away your insecurities and WORK IT, Girls! You can do it!

My open invitation to post your favorite photo along with the story behind it and the reason it is your favorite photo still stands, so don't be shy, send me your fave foto. ― Stana

 

 

 

Wearing Lulu.

 

 

 

Womanless beauty pageant contestant.

The Amazing Androgyn Beauty

I have been following the fascinating blog of Androgyn Beauty for years.

…because of my passion for the fashion and visual arts, I made this blog as a legitimate struggle against the fashion stereotypes and, implicitly, against the mandatory regime regarding the gender division of people: “that is masculine, the other is feminine, you cannot mix them.”

So, mainly I’m here to show you that, when it comes to fashion, nothing is strongly set as masculine or as feminine. The men and the women have the right to adopt any look they want to, and there is no ‘reasonable motif’ to censor (or to mock) their wishes. The choice should not interfere with any of the moral or legal laws, in the real life.

Androgyn is a Spanish beauty who is living his life according to his philosophy and not according to a pigeon hole created by society. I admire him for that, but I also admire him for his fashion sense (if I were 20-something, I would be femulating Androgyn).

I’m adopting an androgyny look simply because I like it, not because I want to send a sexual orientation message (I’m straight, by the way, with the normal dose of homosexuality that resides in everyone’s sexuality), or because I try to step in front of everyone. For me, wearing formally female made clothes is completely normal, they are just pieces of tissues that were cut and sewed in some forms that have no relativity with the sexual gender of the wearer. To wear make-up is similar to wearing a tattoo.

Remember, there are no rules for judging your appearance, there are only closed (small) minds, too afraid of everything that breaks down the formalism, the conservatory views, in any aspects. The future looks forward, not backward. Be part of the future.

Androgyn’s androgynous style is decidedly feminine according to today’s pigeon hole and is certainly worth femulating (especially of you have the legs to carry it off). With that in mind, I proffer Androgyn as the first male to be a “Femulate Her Him” model.

 

 

 

Androgyn Beauty

 

 

 

Actors Brandon Alexander III and Dudley Beene in the 2013 film First Period.
(Thank you, Zoe)

Bad News

"Major broadcast and cable news networks are failing in their coverage of the transgender community, prioritizing sensational depictions of transgender people while ignoring important transgender stories..."

Media Matters tracked transgender coverage on CNN, Fox News, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, NBC, Telemundo and Univision during January and February 2015 and the results are disturbing. Instead of concentrating on substantive transgender issues, the networks preferred to concentrate on Bruce Jenner rumors, Chelsea Manning's hormone therapy and the like.

It's no wonder that we have such a poor public image and are being locked out of bathrooms throughout the USA! (By the way, it's no surprise that the big networks practically ignored the bathroom legislation issue.)

And transpeople were seldom invited to be part of the discussion to speak for themselves. "As GLAAD has noted, 'transgender people are the experts to talk about transgender people.' The absence of trans individuals makes it easier for networks to create negative, misleading, or dehumanizing depictions of transpeople with impunity.

In those rare cases that transpeople were able to speak "about their experiences and community, the impact they had on the tone and content of media coverage was nothing short of transformative."

Enough from me; read it for yourself here.

 

 

 

Wearing M. Missoni.

 

 

 

Actor Sven Schelker in the 2014 Swiss film Der Kreis (The Circle).

Cursed

Back on March 27, Monica wrote here, “I am trying to write a blog/essay on how being transgender is a gift and not a curse… what do you see as the gift(s) of being transgender? What unique perspective and irreplaceable view of life do we have?”

At the time, I had nothing to say, so Monica asked me directly, “I would love to hear your take on what the gifts of being trans-gendered are (and the curse).”

Personally, I think I can summarize it this way.

Being transgender is a curse living part-time male and part-time female, as I do.

Being transgender would be a gift if I lived full-time as a female.

Living part-time involves living a lie in many ways and for me, living a lie is very stressful and a heavy burden on my psyche.

Living full-time would relieve me of those "part-time burdens." However, living full-time would weigh me down with new burdens, that is, the burdens of living as a woman in society today... burdens that I would gladly embrace because that is the way it's supposed to be.

Wearing Brahmin.

Actor Ben Porter in the 2004 British film School of Seduction.