All the lonely people

After the dining out portion of our girl's night out Thursday, Diana and I drove to the cocktail party at Real Art Ways (RAW).

On the third Thursday of each month, this Hartford art center hosts its Creative Cocktail Hour, which usually includes the opening of a new art exhibit, a live band, finger food and of course, creative cocktails. The crowd is very diverse and the local trans community has been showing up from the get go. In fact, one of my long-time trans friends, Audrey, is on the board of RAW.

My iPhone took me on a different route than Diana, but we arrived at RAW simultaneously! The cocktail hour began at 6 and when we arrived at 6:30, the crowd was sparse. I bought a drink and walked around looking at the art exhibits. Then we staked out a comfy wall-length couch, which became tranny central for most of the evening.

In the past, I have seen up to a dozen transwomen in attendance, but this time I counted only four including myself and Diana. RAW board member Audrey showed up as did another long-time trans friend, Deja. I chatted with Audrey and Deja like forever catching up on each other's lives.

Besides chatting, I people-watched. The size of the crowd was atypical for the RAW cocktail party. It is usually wall-to-wall people, but this time, the crowd was much thinner. Dunno why, but it was. And unlike the restaurant, where I felt invisible, the cocktail hour is a very social environment and people watched each other. Invisibility was impossible.

I noticed a number of beautifully-dressed women in attendance and the length of some of their skirts competed with mine. Some of the woman were very friendly and greeted me as if we were old friends despite the fact we had never seen each other before.

A couple of fellows came over to our group of girls, introduced themselves and chatted for awhile… mostly with Deja and not guy-shy me. (I am guy-shy because I am not interested in guys.)

I made a new friend Thursday night, Shawn. He is a friend of Audrey's and came over to chat with us. After he heard me speak, he was taken aback by my accent. When I told him I was born and raised in Waterbury, he said my accent was unlike any Waterbury accent he had ever encountered before. I mentioned that my first language was Polish and I only learned English after my parents bought a television. He thought that maybe having Polish as my language had something to do with my odd Waterbury accent. We then switched gears and talked about the Red Sox… not the ones we wear on our feet, but the ones that play in Fenway Park.

Audrey and Deja moved on to listen to the live band and Diana left for home. I listened to the band for a couple of songs, but the music sounded muddled. I suspect the acoustics of the room were at fault. Whatever --- it was not something I wanted to continue listening to, so I returned to the comfy couch to people watch.

As I sipped my second glass of lime and seltzer, I watched all the lonely people and suddenly felt lonely myself. I felt bad that I didn't try to break the ice with some of the singles who sat nearby at various times throughout the evening. And I promised to myself to do better next time.

And there will be a next time.

Andrej Pejic, femulating fashion model.

Wearing Avon Mark.

You'll freeze your ass off

I took Thursday afternoon off from work in order to get ready for my girls' night out.

After a leisurely lunch, I began the transformation by shaving and applying my makeup.

A Makeup Tip

Over the years, I have used many brands of mascara. but lately, my go-to mascara is Avon's "Super Extend Extreme Mascara." It adds great length as well as volume to my lashes. It also seems to last longer than some other mascaras.

Yes - I am an Avon representative and whenever Avon introduces a new mascara, I always try a tube and usually I am disappointed and back track to Maybelline, but with their Super Extend Extreme Masacar, Avon finally has got it right.

Now back to our regular programming…

I slipped on my undies, nude thigh high stockings and heels, then I began trying on different dresses and modeling them in our full-length mirror to decide what to wear. Originally, I planned to wear the Avon mark brand "Exotic Edge Dress" I purchased recently, but I was concerned that it was too short.

After trying on a half-dozen dresses, I ended up selecting the Exotic Edge Dress after all. It was the shortest dress of the dozen, but not that much shorter and what the heck --- I was going to a cocktail party sponsored by an art museum. From past experience, I knew my hemline would not be the shortest in attendance (and I was correct).

In addition to the dress, I wore my Nine West Love Fury black patent pumps with their sky-high 4.5-inch heels, black B. Makowsky bag, silver earrings (Napier), silver bracelet (Avon mark) and black watch (Avon).

I spritzed some Chanel No. 22 on all the right places and was ready to go. As I said goodbye to y spouse and daughter, my spouse remarked, "You'll freeze your ass off." Which always makes me smile because it reminds me of the adults in "A Christmas Story" warning Ralphie that, "You'll shoot your eye out." Unlike Ralphie, I never froze my ass off and Thursday night was no different.

I left the house at 4:20 PM and arrived at the Mexican restaurant in Hartford 30 minutes later. Diana's car was not in sight, so I cell phoned her to find out where she was in case she was parked in back and already seated inside. Turns out she was stuck in traffic, so I went inside to get a table.

There was only one table occupied at that early dinner hour, so the gent who seated me said I could sit anywhere I liked. A woman brought menus and I perused the fare while waiting for Diana to arrive.

She showed up about ten minutes later and we munched on chips and salsa while deciding what to order. Soon a waiter came to our table and took our drink and dinner orders. While we waited for dinner we chatted about all things trans.

Dinner was excellent and since we are both trying to maintain our girlish figures, we passed on dessert. Before leaving, I wanted to freshen my lipstick, so I excused myself to the ladies' room where I found the prettiest ladies' room I had ever encountered!

We paid the check and exited to our cars to drive to the cocktail party at Real Art Ways about ten minutes from the restaurant.

There is not much to say about our restaurant experience. It was as if we were invisible to the staff and other diners. We were just two old ladies and nobody paid much attention to us. However, I must add that there were hardly any other diners to pay any attention to us. Only two other tables were occupied while we were there --- the other diners were outside on the patio.

Come back tomorrow for the cocktail party portion of our girl's night out.

Femulating fashion model Dimitry Rublyovsky.

Wearing Boston Proper.

Wig Out

Thursday' girls' night out was the debut of yet another new wig for Ms. Stana. (More to follow after I drink more coffee,)

Night Out

It's girls' night out tonight as I meet up with my girlfriend and world renowned blogger, Diana, at our favorite Mexican restaurant where we will hatch plans on how to femulate the blogosphere (and then the world).

After dinner, we will move on to Real Art Ways for their monthly Creative Cocktail Hour, where we will just be fabulous (until they kick us out).

La de da.

Eduarda Brigida, Miss Gay Universe

 

Wearing Boston Proper.

Femulating Faculty

Starla sent along another 99 images of femulating students (and one faculty member) that she found in online school yearbooks.

I always suspect that something is up trans-wise when a faculty member femulates along with the students and in this batch, we find a student-teacher who "shows off his feminine side on Halloween." Does Miss Waugh's perfect wig or cleanly shaved legs or slingback pumps hint that she shows off her feminine side on other occasions? Just wondering.

One of my high school teachers femulated at my high school for some occasion, which I cannot recall. I learned later that she femulated on other occasions that had nothing to do with school if you know what I mean.

Anyway, the 99 images from Starla now reside in the Yearbooks collection on flickr and you may view them in two ways:

Method 1: Open one of the Yearbooks sets (A through Z) and you will find the newest uploads at the end/bottom of the set. (The oldest uploads appear at the beginning/top of the set.)

Method 2: Open this photostream and you will find the newest uploads at the top of page 1. The uploads get older as the page numbers get higher with the oldest uploads on the last page.

By the way, the contents of the Yearbook A through Z sets are organized according to school name, for example, the photos from Sacred Heart High School would be in the Yearbooks S set.

The Dublin Drag Orchestra.

 

Wearing Anna Sui.

Casa Susanna on Broadway

Four-time Tony Award winner Harvey Fierstein is set to return to Broadway with Casa Valentina, about a group of heterosexual men in the Catskills in the 1960s who enjoy getting together to dress up like women. Problems begin when the men must decide whether or not to go public with their organization. (Source: Entertainment Weekly)

In real life, Casa Valentina was Casa Susanna. The New York Times printed a story about it in 2007, which came on the heels of the publication of a photo book containing flea market found snapshots of the girls who femulated at Casa Susanna.

Casa Susanna was also the site of the 1968 book A Year Among the Girls by Darrell G. Raynor, the “Uncensored and Unexpurgated – the World-Famous Autobiographical Report on the Men Who Dress in Woman’s Clothing – the Transvestites” …the book that opened my eyes to the fact that I was not alone.

(Thanks to Aunty Marlena for the heads-up about this story.)

 

Olvin Medalen femulating in the 1920s.

 

 

Wearing Albert Ferretti.

Just Pictures

Actor Dave Foley femulating on a Halloween episode of television's Newsradio in 1996.

Wearing Boston Proper.

Namoli Brennet: In the Flesh

Singer-songwriter Namoli Brennet performs intimate folk concert at Congregational Church in Cornwall,  CT

Cornwall,  CT  (September  2013)—Dubbed  “among  the  best  folk-rock  artists  in  the country,"  by  the  Tucson  Weekly,  singer-songwriter  and  Connecticut  native  Namoli Brennet is known for the honesty and intensity of her live shows, as well as her quirky and comedic performance patter. A trans woman who was named one of the inaugural Trans 100 on the first ever list highlighting accomplished members of the transgender community across the United States, Brennet will perform a live concert of her soulful, witty songs on Saturday, October 19, 2013, at 7 pm at the United Church of Christ in Cornwall, Connecticut.

***

I  lunched with Namoli at  the True Color Conference in 2007. Here is what I wrote about it back then:

"I had lunch with D and J, two girls from my support group, and Namoli Brennet, a Tucson-based trans/genderqueer songwriter, who has been touring the country since 2002 when she released her first CD, Boy in a Dress. It was the first time I ever rubbed elbows with a rock star.

"Namoli performed at the conference and also conducted a workshop. She is a very nice person in person!

"Funny thing is that I am familiar with the song Boy in a Dress (I have it on my iPod), but I did not connect the song with her, the person with whom I was breaking bread."

I doubt if Namoli remembers me, but I sure do remember her and plan to attend her Connecticut concert next month. If you are in the area, I highly recommend that you attend, too, and hope to see you there!

 "Boy in a Dress" photographed by Anna Mimoumi.

 Wearing Boston Proper.

Friday the 13th

I received my daily e-mail from Payless ShoeSource reminding me that they still have a BOGO sale in progress, that is, buy one and get one for half-price. To sweeten the pot, today's e-mail included a 13% off coupon in honor of Friday the 13th.

I need a new pair of sneakers. The ones I bought in the spring are literally falling apart, so how can I resist the Payless sale. So I was off to the local Payless this morning with the coupon tucked in my purse.

The saleswoman at the register was new to me. Some of the saleswoman in the local Payless stores know about me and don’t blink an eye when I start trying on ladies’ shoes while in bou mode.

Anyway, I went to the rack containing male sneakers, which is in the same aisle as female size 10 to 13 footwear. How perfect is that! I quickly found a pair of sneakers that I liked, tried them on and they were a perfect fit.

Now I turned my attention to the female footwear across the aisle. Although the pickings were slim, I found two pairs to try on. I helped myself to the free peds that the store has on hand, removed my shoes and my pink ankle socks, slipped on the peds and tried on the shoes (a size 11 and a size 12).

While I was trying on the female footwear, the saleswoman came by and asked if I needed any assistance. I said I was fine and added that "I am trans, so don't mind me.”

She said, “Well if you need any help, let me know.”

The size 12 (a glam glam sandal) did not fit. Actually, my foot fit in the shoe, but the ankle strap was too short. The size 11 (an ivory open-toed bow sandal) fit and was to die for. Look at the photo and I think you will agree.

I removed the peds, put my socks and shoes back on and took my purchases up to the saleswoman at the register.

While she was ringing up my purchase, I took out my iPhone and surfed to an image of me en femme on flickr. I held up the iPhone and said to the saleswoman, "This is me."

As she looked at the iPhone, her eyes grew bigger and she said, "Wow!"

"Thank you for the 'wow'," was my response.

She added, "I love the shoes you bought."

"I love them, too." As I spoke those words, I noticed that my voice had shifted to my femme voice without even thinking about it!

How cool is that!

 

Actor Jared Leto femulating in the Summer 2013 issue of Candy magazine.

 

 

 

Wearing Versus.

Selfies

Last week, I mentioned that I take a lot of selfies.

I started taking selfies about the same time I started dressing en femme from head to toe. I wanted to see how others would see the female me rather than how I saw myself in that full-length mirror mounted on my mother's closet door.

Self-photography provided the means to do that, but it was expensive because you had to use real film. You had to buy film to take your selfies and then pay to have your selfies processed. You also had to buy flash bulbs to take good selfies indoors.

And then there was the potential for being embarrassed and outed if the person processing the film realized that the girl posing in your selfies was actually you! I wonder how many femulators built darkrooms in their basements to avoid being outed?

I avoided the problem by using a Polaroid SX-70 camera. Polaroid film was more expensive, but I did not have to take the photos of my "girlfriend" anywhere to be processed.

However, the expense did prevent me from taking mass quantities of selfies. Then the Apple QuickTake digital camera entered my life and changed everything.

Quality-wise, the QuickTake was a step backward from the Polaroid, but the film was now "free" and I could take as many selfies as I wanted, at least until the camera's battery ran down.

And I did take a LOT of selfies! Thousands to be inexact.

As digital cameras improved, I graduated from the QuickTake to the Canon PowerShot. And as the Canons improved, I upgraded my PowerShots and currently own my third, a Canon PowerShot SD940 IS. It is full-featured, takes excellent photos, and I thought it was the cat's meow until I started taking photos with my iPhone 5.

Comparing photos taken during the same photoshoot with the Canon and the iPhone, the iPhone does a better job (IMHO). Or should I say, I do a better job taking photos with the iPhone than I do with the Canon. Perhaps if I was a better or more knowledgable photographer, I could do a better job with the Canon, but for now, the iPhone is my go-to camera.

The iPhone does have a couple of drawbacks as a camera.

Whereas the Canon allows me to take timed selfies, iPhone's Camera app does not have that feature. I corrected that problem quickly by obtaining camera apps (Top Camera and Camera+) that do include the self-timer function. Now I can take self-timed selfies.

The other drawback is the inability to use a tripod with the iPhone. Sure, you can take self-timed selfies without a tripod --- I've done it and it is a pain in the dupa. So I fixed that problem too by purchasing a tripod designed for cell phone camera applications: the Case Star Octopus Style Portable and Adjustable Tripod.

So you can count on seeing more and better quality selfies here in the future.

 

European vacation femulating.

 

Wearing DressBarn.

Juxtapose

Juxtapose – isn’t that a great word?

The juxtaposition of today’s Femulator and Femulate Her images below reminds me of a scene in the film Trainspotting.

Sitting in a nightclub checking out the clientele, which seems to include straight, gay, trans, and androgynous folk, the character played by Ewan McGregor muses, “The world is changing. Music is changing. Drugs are changing. Even men and women are changing. One thousand years from now, there won't be any guys and there won't be any girls...”

Although the boy in the Femulator image is wearing items from milady’s closet as well as makeup and a feminine hairdo, he is not really femulating (“Look Ma, no boobs!”). Rather, he is presenting as androgynous.

Similarly, the Femulate Her model is wearing an androgynous outfit that is influenced by menswear. But that is nothing new; girls have been borrowing from the boy’s closet like forever. Well, it seem like forever because girls have been wearing boy’s clothing throughout my lifetime. But boys borrowing girl’s stuff is a relatively recent fashion/social phenomena. And it is a growing trend.

Visit websites like Juan’s The New Male Fashions for the Alternative Man to see what’s going on. Juan not only shows what the fashion designers are hoping boys will wear, but he also shows photos of real life boys actually wearing the new fashions.

And then there is my little corner of the world.

In the recent past, I would see males carrying handbags that could be mistaken for computer bags; you know the kind – big, black, utilitarian and ugly.

Lately, boys’ handbags have gotten more – do I dare say “dainty.” They come a variety of shapes and colors, have thinner straps and handles and are smaller in size. Boys handbags will never be mistaken for computer bags again.

Whereas boys of the recent past quietly wore cosmetics, recently I overheard boys conversing about makeup and moisturizers rather than quarterbacks and grand slams.

At the rate things are going, it will not take one thousand years for there to be no guys nor girls. It’s happening right before our eyes!  

 

Modern male.

 

Wearing Alice + Olivia.