The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

 

Actor Jeremy Stockwell femulating in the 1970 film Dinah East.

FEMULATE HER:

 

Wearing Alice and Olivia.

MTV's House of Style Visits Trans Punk Rocker

 The Cut has the story and video here.

The Femulated / Femulate Her

 THE FEMULATED:

 Los Angeles femulators, 1949.

FEMULATE HER:

 Wearing DVF.

Work, Shoes and Vacation

I wrote here awhile back that my manager, a male, was let go in the fall of 2009. A female replaced him and she reported to a male VP.

That male VP announced that he will retire December 31. His replacement is female.

As a result, starting January 1, I will report to a female who also reports to a female.

The boys' club is becoming a girls' club. Either way, I fit in.

***

The chatter about my Halloween day en femme at work has died down to zero.

Some blog readers commented that since I have done three Halloweens at work en femme, my co-workers probably suspect something is up.

I am sure that they do, but no one has said so out loud to me, although, one fellow made the following comment in a feigned sarcastic manner, "Yeah --- you just happened to have that outfit handy to wear." 

***

Nine West, my go-to shoe store, is having an excellent sale. I just bought a pair of $89 platform pumps for $48.

***

Starting today, I am on vacation until January 2. I don't expect that my time-off will affect the daily blog postings here, but if I miss a day, don't worry --- I am just vacationing and will be back real soon.

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Actor Michael Fassbender (right) femulating in a deleted scene from X-Men: First Class, 2011

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing Alice and Olivia.

What’s “feminine” anyway?

Man Carrying Purse

Whenever I recount my trans biography (like at outreach), I usually mention that as a youngster, I participated in sports (baseball and football) and played "boy games" (cowboys, war, spacemen, etc.). I felt that I was a typical boy and I enjoyed doing "boy things," unlike many of my trans sisters, who as children, hated "boy things" and preferred "girl things."

I also mention in my bio that despite my participation and enjoyment of those boy things, other boys called me names like "sissy," "fairy," "faggot," etc., which indicated to me that I was not necessarily all the boy I thought I was.

This was not just a case of bullies using random offensive names to raise my ire. Even a few of my friends told me that I was not acting like a boy at a 100% level and that I should do something about it.

I wondered if there was something in my mannerisms or speech that caused their reaction? I was not intentionally acting or speaking in an affected manner. Rather, I was speaking and acting in my natural manner, which I did not feel was feminine.

The fact that even friends told me that something was amiss indicated that something really was amiss, but I was clueless. I had no idea what I had to do differently to be more boy-like. So, I continued acting the same way I always acted and if someone called me a name, I hit them with my purse.

Even in high school, college, and law school, I occasionally ran into guys, who commented on my particular flavor of masculinity, but I just shrugged them off and kept on truckin'. By then, I was crossdressing in secret and only coming out en femme for Halloween including an appearance in drag at a Halloween party in law school.

I will never forget a friend of mine at that party telling me that he never realized how feminine my speaking and mannerisms were until he saw me in drag. He indicated that my female costume was a perfect fit for my normal mannerisms and speech.

After mentioning this story at outreach one time, one of the students said that my mannerisms were feminine and that my friends and acquaintances had been in the ballpark in their estimation of me.

Yet, nothing has changed. I still do not affect a feminine persona. I still act naturally and no differently whether in boy mode or girl mode.

I admit that I do try to walk more like a woman when I am en femme and I talk more softly when I femulate, but most of what you get is the genuine me. And I am not changing a thing.

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

 

Rockers Freddie Mercury (left) and Roger Taylor (right)
femulating for The Great Pretender video, 1987

FEMULATE HER:

  

 Wearing DressBarn.

Christmas Time (Is Here Again)

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

 

Danila Kovalev, femulating male model

FEMULATE HER:

 

Wearing Ann Taylor.

Like Father, Like Daughter

There is some truth to the above cartoon on a personal level.

Doing the laundry Sunday, I found a load of clothes in the dryer that belonged to my daughter. As I was sorting and folding her clothing, I noticed that she and I wear the same style of Victoria's Secret panties. Hers are a size smaller than mine, but some of the colors and patterns of her panties matched mine exactly!

We both also wear Victoria's Secret bras, but our bras are not an exact match like our panties.

My daughter also has a penchant for high heels. I guess she takes after her Daddy!

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

The Who drummer and femulator, Keith Moon.

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing New York & Company.

Does this photo make me look tall?

I took over 100 photos Tuesday afternoon trying different poses and camera angles as suggested by Reva. In the above shot, the camera was on the floor. It resulted in a good view of my shoes and a lengthening of my legs (as if I needed longer legs).

I had a lot of fun doing the photoshoot and will continue to post the results, which may have been better if it was not a self-photoshoot!

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

 Rock singer Freddie Mercury femulating.

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing Spiegel.

Early Outing

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Rock singer Mick Jagger femulating once again.

 

FEMULATE HER:

 Wearing Torn by Ronny Kobo.

The Femulation of Vasiliy Makarov

View this video; you will not be disappointed.

Miss Eng’g (She’s Back!)

The 2012 installment of the Miss Eng'g (Engineering) womanless beauty pageant will take place Saturday evening at the College of Engineering, University of Philippines-Diliman.

This year, the pageant's Internet presence is on Facebook. There are a lot of photos of the pageant contestants in male and female garb (more of the former than the latter) on Facebook now and I am sure there are more female garb photos to come this weekend. So visit the page and revisit it often.

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Rock group U2 femulating for the One video, 1991

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing Young by Yo Yo Yeung.

My Dream Marriage

I have mentioned my dreams here a few times in the past. I seldom recall them when I wake up, but the ones I do recall always have a trans theme.

Over the years, my dreams have gone through a few stages.

The first stage, which lasted for many years were dreams about getting dressed en femme or trying to get dressed en femme and not being able to do so because something prevented me or because I woke up before I was got dressed.

The second stage, which lasted a year or so were dreams about getting dressed en femme, then going out and encountering friends and family who approved of my dressing.

The third and most recent stage, which has lasted for a year or so are dreams where I am dressed all the time, that is, I do not get dressed in the dream, rather I am dressed as a woman from the get-go. Getting dressed is not part of these dreams because I am living as a woman full-time or I am a woman in these dreams (it is unclear which is the case).

Last night, I had an unusual dream. I don't think it is a new stage, but it is an interesting twist to my dreams. In last night's dream, I was married to a male and we attended the "Big E" as a husband and wife (the Big E, also known as the Eastern States Exposition, is a huge annual state fair for all six New England states).

In real life, I often go to the Big E, but never en femme. Also, in real life, I am not attracted to males. So go figure!

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

French soldiers femulating on stage in a German POW camp, 1916.

 

FEMULATE HER: 

Wearing Spiegel.

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Grayson Perry, femulating artist, 2012.

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing Torn by Ronny Kobo.

Christmas Party Style

Wearing DressBarn (tank top), Macy’s (leggings), Nine West (shoes), Avon (jewelry).

Out Now

When this is posted this evening, I will be attending the Avon representative Christmas party.

I promise to post a full report about the party real soon now!

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Gene Chandler, professional femulator, circa 1964.

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing Le Redoute.

Avon Calling

I have been an Avon lady for 17 years!

I don't sell a lot of Avon because I only do it on a part-time basis, but maybe when I retire, I will go full-time (in more than one way, perhaps).

In the meantime, I enjoy what I do sell. Selling Avon allows me to be aware of and try out the latest products for us girls.

Also, it gives me the opportunity to associate with other Avon ladies as I will Tuesday evening when I attend the Avon lady Christmas party. (I can't wait!)

Another benefit are the special deals that come our way. For example, this morning I bought a pair of cute suede booties with a faux-fur trim, suede-covered button accent, and 3-5/8-inch heel for $20; their original price was $50.

I love being an Avon lady!

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Actor Philip Seymour Hoffman femulating in the film Flawless, 1999.

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing Rachel Zoe.

Like Father, Like Son

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Femulating super model Andrej Pejic, 2012.

FEMULATE HER:

   Wearing Spiegel.

Trans Fashion Show Tonight

If you are in the Gilroy, California area, Carolyn Jones has put together a trans fashion show and private shopping spree at the Lane Bryant (6815 Camino Arroyo, Space 4, Gilroy, CA 95020) between 6 and 9 PM tonight.

There will be food as well as door prizes and events including:

• Breast forms from TheBreastFormStore.com 
• $50 gift certificate to House of Wigs in Los Altos 
• Gifts from Lane Bryant 
• Fashion show featuring Lane Bryant's winter line 
• Private shopping with the sales staff 
•  Makeup artists to help you complete your look 

Phone 408-848-0252 for more information and sign up for the event here at here.

Bree Femulates in the UK – Part 3

By Bree Wagner, Femulate Guest Blogger

I made it to London a bit later than expected on Saturday and made up my mind that Sunday was going to be a day for Bree and I couldn’t wait.

I woke up the next morning, rushed down for a quick breakfast, and headed back to the room for all the typical prep work. I wish it didn’t take so much time to transform from beast (super hunk) to beauty (marginally presentable)!

The shaving, agonizing over eye shadow color, and fighting with the eyeliner pencil, I knew I was running a bit longer than I hoped. I wasn’t quite going to make the opening of the doors at the museum, but I wouldn’t be too far behind.

Getting dressed was more tough choices. I really wanted to wear a skirt and the one other top I had brought. Challenges came with those choices. The skirt meant I would be wearing my heeled boots and it wasn’t quite the right skirt and boot length combination. Also, it could be a long day on my feet in those as I was planning on walking everywhere.

The top was a pink and dark blue blouse that left me with the same challenges I had while at the castle. The blouse would stick out below the jacket and look silly so I had to hide the bottom of it with a strategic tuck while the jacket was on. At least it also had ¾-length sleeves!

Clothing and hair completed, it was time to head off. The only two must-do things on my itinerary for the day were the British Museum and the British Library. I had visited the museum last year, but there is no possible way to see everything you might want to see there in anything less than a week and I really wanted to get back.

It was a fairly long walk from the King’s Cross area to the museum and I made it longer by accidentally circling around the far side of the museum due to some poor navigation. The heels quickly grew uncomfortable while walking long stretches, but were OK while just standing. It’s too bad that it’s so hard to get a good feel for the long term comfort of shoes when just trying them on or taking them for a quick outing.

I made it to the museum and my first stop had to be the bathroom. Apparently I got there at just the right time because when I came out there was a huge queue. Standing in a long line in that situation would not have appealed to me.

Then on to the good stuff; which there is probably too much to mention. A few of the highlights were the Rosetta Stone, portions of the Parthenon, Egyptian statuary and mummies, incredible collection of Greek and Roman artifacts, and exhibits on medieval Europe.

I got pictures of myself with a lot of it and plenty of pictures of just the artifacts that I could put in other albums.

There were some very friendly exchanges with others “I’ll take your picture if you take mine.” I really should have done more of that, but there is still plenty of nervousness because I know what I sound like.

I spent about four hours at the museum, again not enough, but after a quick stop in the gift shop, I had to get going. It was another long walk to the British Library and now my feet were really cranky. I didn’t have much time before the Library was going to close so I hit the highlights.

The Magna Carta was impressive, but there was a lot more to grab my attention. Probably the coolest things were the maps of the world from 1500-1650. The detail and craftsmanship was incredible. There were also plenty of religious documents, illuminated manuscripts, scientific documents, plays, and of course handwritten Beatles lyrics. Cool stuff. With closing time approaching, I headed back to my hotel.

Even with all that, I wasn’t ready to give up on a night for Bree. All the big attractions were closed, but there were still plenty of sights to take in and experiences to have. I got back to the hotel, took a few Advil for my feet, and relaxed for a few minutes.

I knew I’d need to change for night since there was a lot of walking in my plan. I figured I’d throw my jeans on since it was getting colder and switch to flats. Unfortunately, even the flats aren’t a great fit and not too comfy after a while. With a big sigh I made the completely unfashionable choice to go with my men’s running shoes. While it pained me a bit to do so, it turned out to be the completely right choice and my feet thanked my brain.

With a quick touch-up of my hair and lipstick, I headed over to King’s Cross to catch the tube. It was way busier than I expected and it was tightly packed all the way to the London Bridge station on the far side of the river. It was a bit nerve-wracking to be in such close proximity to so many people, but as is often the case, most people are pretty darn uninterested in everyone around them. If anyone picked up on something odd, they were polite enough not to openly goggle in my direction.

My plan was to get out just across the river and to cross back over London Bridge for some pictures with the well-lit Tower Bridge in the background. That turned out great! I took a few more self-portraits and asked a nice man to take my picture and he was happy to oblige.

From there, I walked along the river taking a few more shots with bridges and the Shard in the background. I turned away from the river to head up to St. Paul’s Cathedral. There were fairly sizable crowds in the area and it was a nice surprise to be able to get into the cathedral. There was a service going on so I, and most of the people, had to just stay in the back and look around a bit. It’s quite an impressive building. I’ll have to go back and take the real tour during the day if I get the chance.

At this point, I had to make a decision to head for the underground or walk all the way back to my hotel. I decided to walk since I didn’t want the night to end any earlier than it needed to and with the choice of shoes I made, my feet were just fine.

I stopped in the busy Starbucks just outside St Paul’s to grab a peppermint hot chocolate (delicious) to keep me a bit warmer for the trip back to the hotel. It was a good choice since all the other coffee shops I passed later were closed already.

The only eventful note of the trip back was missing a street I should have turned on because I didn’t see the name on the far side of the road. I usually don’t wear my glasses while dressed since they aren’t a particularly feminine style and my eyes aren’t terrible. It probably cost me ten minutes of backtracking (and maybe five earlier in the day), so not a big loss compared to the roughly three miles I walked that night. Even so, I’m really hoping to get LASIK soon and not need to worry about that.

Sadly, the adventures ended there. The three days I got out were truly incredible and I’d love to get more opportunities like it in the future, but I know they are hard to come by. The only thing I could think of that would have made it even better would have been having my wife or a travelling companion for some good conversation. Also, you can really only do so many different types of pictures from one arm’s length away!

I hope you enjoyed the trip report.

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Actors Jimmy Fallon and Amaury Nolasco femulating
on television’s Late Night With Jimmy Fallon, 2012

 

FEMULATE HER:

  Wearing Macy’s.

2012 Miss Eng'g Video

In case you are unaware of the annual Miss Eng'g competition, the girls in this video are boys!

My Christmas Party Outfit

Tuesday evening, I will attend the local Avon representative Christmas party. I attended once before, in 2006, and except for a male VIP from the home office, it was an all-girl affair.

I had a wonderful time and seemed to be accepted by the other girls, but I was way overdressed for the party. As I wrote at the time, "Most of the other reps wore slacks or jeans with tops and a minority wore skirts with tops. I was the only rep wearing a dress."

I did not want to make the same mistake again, so I planned to dress to fit in.

I want to wear my new leopard platform pumps and I tried to build an outfit around those shoes. I quickly added my black leggings with the zippered cuffs and my new black B. Makowsky satchel bag to the outfit, but I needed a top.

I own a leopard print long-sleeved V-neck top, but it is too tight. It worked when I wore it with soft-cup bras, but does not work with the full-figure bras I wear now. So I began shopping for a new leopard print top.

I checked all the websites of the local stores and found a top at DressBarn that would be perfect: a sequined leopard tank.

After lunch, I visited the local DressBarn. 

Don't you just love it when you walk into a store and exactly what you are looking for in your exact size is hanging on the first rack you peruse! That is what happened to me today; I completed my Christmas party outfit and it only cost $17.

Bree Femulates in the UK – Part 2

By Bree Wagner, Femulate Guest Blogger

My final day in Yorkshire started with a trip in to work, but we wrapped up very quickly and I was back to my hotel by lunchtime. I wanted to get out to something in the countryside or at least something new, rather than just wander around the town again. Unfortunately, one of the areas I was told to visit, Fountains Abbey, was closed on Fridays in November. Bummer.

I got a little bit of internet time with lunch and did some research. Turns out there was a town just a bit down the road from me with the ruins of a 13^th century castle and some great views over the river with a great rail bridge. After getting dressed it’d be off to Knaresborough.

I didn’t have much of a wardrobe to choose from since I made sure to keep plenty of space in my luggage for all the gifts that I’d inevitably acquire on the trip. It turned out that what I did have wasn’t exactly the best for the weather, which was only getting into the low 40s. I only have two warm coats and the coat I brought was fairly short and only had ¾-length sleeves. That wasn’t a problem (other than cold forearms!) with the top I wore to the gardens since it had a similar cut.

While I sure could have worn it again, variety is the spice of life, right? I went with a pink sleeveless shirt and a lightweight brown top with a hood and some grey slacks. I had brought a pair of brown flats and a brown purse so I thought it would work together, but it really didn’t mesh with the coat. I didn’t expect it to be warm enough so I had to bring the coat along.

I was about five minutes from being ready to go when the fire alarm went off in the hotel. For the third time during my stay --- I couldn’t believe it, but I started grabbing my things to head out. Luckily, the alarm shut off by the time I was reaching for the door. I composed myself, took care of the finishing touches, and was ready to go.

I had been driving to work for a week and a half, but this was to be Bree’s first time driving and with the thrill of going out with only a general sense of where I was headed. I was hoping I’d just follow the signs first to Knaresborough and then to the castle.

It sure seemed like events were conspiring against me; almost as soon as I left the hotel. Just a block away I hit traffic jam for unknown reasons that took quite a while to clear. Then when I got onto the main road to Knaresborough, I got stuck behind a train and another unknown jam.

I made it into the town only to quickly take a wrong turn because I saw a sign for a castle. Wrong castle. A U-turn was required and I eventually found my very winding way to the correct place. My expected 15-minute journey took about an hour.

I got out of the car just as it started to rain a bit to go along with the cold and wind. There was no way I was getting away without a jacket. Too bad the sleeves of the brown coat stuck out of the jacket and it was far longer than the coat. It was a fashion disaster. I’m not proud of it, but I ducked behind a ruined stone wall, tucked the top into my pants and eventually got around to pushing up the sleeves. I was willing to be a bit colder to not look totally silly. I’m not exactly a slave to high fashion, but I obviously cared a lot more than I would as a guy.

I wandered around the castle grounds and took a bunch of pictures of myself (of course), the grounds and the picturesque town and rail bridge. I even got a few shots of the train going across the bridge. I can imagine it would be an even prettier area with a little sunshine, but alas, I got nothing but grey with a bit of rain. Can’t expect much else from England in November!

I stayed for a little under an hour and figured that if I could get back to Harrogate in reasonable time, I could do a little shopping before the stores closed. I just can’t get used to everything, but restaurants closing at 5:30! I did make it back faster than the trip out, but it was still slow. I went back to park at the hotel and hustled into town since I didn’t have much time.

My first stop was Marks and Spencer. They have some really nice stuff, but most of it was a bit out of my price range at the moment. (I can’t wait for a raise with my upcoming promotion!) I tried on a few pairs of shoes and loved a pair of over the ankle brown boots but £95 was way too much. I browsed a few more areas, but thought I’d try and get to the less expensive option around the corner, Primark.

At Primark I just didn’t have enough time to get through as much of the store as I would have liked before closing time. It was one of the few places I could find stuff that might actually be less expensive than I would find in the States.

I bought a lovely pair of pink suede pumps, a bra and panty set, and some stockings all for £12. I should have stocked up on the stockings, they were a great deal. It sure looked like they had a good selection of accessories and clothing that I would have loved to spend more time browsing through. Oh well, they tossed us all out and I resigned myself to heading back to the hotel.

I figured I’d get a few more minutes out by taking a circuitous route and grabbing a few more photos. When I got back, I was half expecting another fire alarm. I made it to the room and had to try out the heels with a sweater dress I had brought, but wasn’t expecting to get the chance to wear.

I may have also taken a few shots with the new things I purchased and wore under the sweater dress. I think they were as fabulous as could be and I’m thrilled with them. After that, it was time to wrap things up so I could get some dinner and pack up for my journey south to London early in the morning.

Stay tuned for Part 3!

The Femulated / Femulate Her

THE FEMULATED:

Actors Benjamin Koldyke and Amaury Nolasco femulating on television’s Work It, 2012

 

FEMULATE HER:

Wearing ECI.

Bree Femulates in the UK – Part 1

By Bree Wagner

It was just over a year ago that I took my first steps out of the closet to sneak out of a hotel room and go get gas. What an amazing year it’s been. Since that point my wife has become much more accommodating of my crossdressing to include encouraging me to go meet others, giving me my name, and eventually even going out with me dressed.

I’ve had some wonderful experiences, gone to some great places, and met some wonderful people. It would be hard to ask for more. Even with that, I wouldn’t have expected in my wildest dreams that I’d get to get out on an international trip.

I really wasn't sure if it would happen, but Bree made her first appearance across the pond. I had packed my luggage with care; I needed all the space an extra wardrobe takes up and enough space to ensure I could take a good volume of presents home with me. Overall, I had a great time in the UK (other than that little bit about being there for work!) and was able to get out and about three times --- each being more incredible than the last.

The whole trip started off with a detour to Stonehenge on our way from Heathrow to Harrogate. It added a few hours journey to the day but was certainly worth it. That stop also started the pile of gifts that have built up in my suitcase to take home to soothe the savage beast that my wife will claim to be after hearing about my trip and not getting to take part this time.

After that it was mostly work, workout, eat and bed for the rest of the week. Damn those full English breakfasts! I really have had to watch my bacon intake. 

I did get away from work for a few hours one day before the sun went down. I visited Bolton Abbey and from there climbed Simon's Seat, a hill in the dales just west of Harrogate. Gorgeous sights (with amazing pictures) and well worth the hike.

On the weekend I went off to Edinburgh for a day and toured the castle, walked the Royal Mile, and climbed up Arthur's Seat overlooking the city to get some great pictures. On my way back to Harrogate, I stopped at the English/Scottish Border and at one of the old Roman forts along Hadrian's Wall. Talk about impressive ruins from almost 2000 years ago!

Monday, I didn’t have to be at work until 1 and figured I’d take the opportunity for Bree to get out and wander through the Valley Gardens in Harrogate. I got ready, did my makeup with as much care as I could spare in the time available, and picked an outfit. I went with a favorite red, gray, and black striped top with gray pants, black heeled boots and a ¾-sleeve black jacket. 

It was a ton of fun to get out. I spent a bit over an hour in the gardens looking for good picture spots (there were plenty) and checking out the flowers that had survived the recent frosts.

I then had a bit of time to wander back to my hotel through the town. It was quite a bit more walking than I've done in those heels before and it became clear that a few more stops (and snaps!) were in order. So pictures in the town center, in front of the famous Betty's Tea Room, and a few more were taken. All too soon I had to get back to change for work.

Unfortunately, as I got back to my hotel to change the fire alarm went off just as I made it to my room. So it was back down nine flights of stairs (just as the boots were really starting to get to me!) and out of the hotel for 15 or so minutes. I decided that I might as well make the best of it and wandered around looking for some pretty areas and taking a few more pictures. With all that, I still made it to work on time, but it was close!
After this I was really excited to get another opportunity or two to get dressed and get out. My plans were to try and get out into the countryside and to see some of London.

Stay tuned for Part 2!