6.125 inches

Ten days ago, I asked "How high?" was the latest ShoeDazzle offering named "Privy."

ShoeDazzle claimed that the shoe's heel was 5.5 inches, but added "that "measurements are approximate and may vary by size."

I surmised that in my size, the heel would be about 7 inches high because larger sizes require higher heels.

I wrote that "I cannot imagine walking in shoes with a 7-inch heel, but I am tempted to order the shoe just to see how really high it is."

I gave into temptation because in addition to my curiosity about the heel's height, the lime-green color of the shoe was a perfect match to a lime-green / white polka dot dress that I own.

The shoes arrived last night and I measured the heel as soon as I opened the shoe box.

The heel is not quite 7 inches high, but pretty close: 6 and 1/8th inches.

After measuring the heel, I slipped on the shoes and I am happy to report that I am able to walk in shoes with a 6.125-inch heel! 

What’s in Storrs for Me on Friday

On Friday, I will be returning to my alma mater, the University of Connecticut, which is the site of the True Colors Conference this weekend.

The Conference focuses on the needs of LGBTQ youth and their allies and thousands of young people and adults from around the country will be in attendance.

I have conducted workshops in the past at the Conference, but I did not get my act together in time this year, so no workshop for me. However, I will be staffing the booth of the Connecticut Outreach Society (COS) throughout the day (that’s me in the photo at the booth in 2009).

If you are attending the Conference, please stop by the booth and say "Hello."

Five Million!

A few minutes ago, the hit counter passed the 5,000,000 mark here on the old Femulate blog.

Thank you all for your patronage!

Best Wishes,

Stana

Call Me Sissy

According to my recollection, the first negative word ever hurled at me was "sissy."

"Sissy" according to The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language, Third Edition is "a boy or man regarded as effeminate."

To illuminate that definition, the dictionary defines "effeminate" as "having qualities or characteristics more often associated with women than men; characterized by weakness and excessive refinement."

Yes - that's me. The dictionary could print an image of me next to the printed words to illustrate the definition.

The thing is that the first time I was called a sissy, I had no idea that I was one. All I knew was that I was "me" and I was not intentionally emulating females.

But the name-calling continued. And then there was bullying.

So I figured something was wrong with me and when things really got bad, I eschewed anything feminine.

After things settled down, I went back to my old ways and was myself again comfortably picking and choosing what I liked from the masculine and feminine aisles in that big department store called "Life."

Older and wiser, I eventually ignored the taunting, learned to embrace my self, and became my own man or should I say "woman."

Actually, I am somewhere in between. Circumstances prevent me from being a woman all the time. Some of the time, I am a feminine man and some of the time, I am a feminine woman, so you can call me "sissy;" it's a good fit.

The Million Dollar Question

She's the Man

Like Father, Like Son

Aunty Marlena sent me two links (1 and 2) to the Misster Teen Redfield womanless pageant, which was held at Redfield Junior High School (RJHS) in Arizona.

Visiting the school’s Facebook page, I discovered two links (1 and 2) for the Misster Redfield womanless pageant (Warning: bearded femulators).

Seems that two womanless pageants are conducted on the same night: one for the male students at RJHS and one for the fathers of the students at RJHS.

The femulations were average, but my kudos go out to the student who won the teen division of the pageant. Instead of a wig, his own hair sported a female do and his makeup was perfect (see the accompanying photo).

Blog Minutia

E-mail Backlog

I had two big freelance editing projects to complete recently and in order to meet my deadlines, I had to throw something under the bus. That something was answering e-mails, so for the last ten days or so, e-mails have been piling up unanswered.

I apologize for not answering your e-mails, but something had to give.

The good news is that I buttoned up the last editing project last night and can begin catching up with my e-mails.

Off Thursday

To celebrate the completion of another orbit around the Sun, I am off Thursday, but will return to our normally scheduled programming on Friday.

Trans-Nazis and Trans-Harpies

I attended the IFGE convention in Philadelphia in 2004.

Previous to the convention, I did not get out much en femme. I attended my support group's monthly meetings and occasional outings and I attended First Event a few times.

Back then, my support group and First Event were more oriented towards crossdressers, rather than  transsexuals. Although my support group was a gateway for crossdressers who discovered they were transsexuals (who would then leave to join the local transsexual support group), most of the members were non-transsexual crossdressers. As a result, I did not encounter many transsexuals until I attended the IFGE convention.

The IFGE convention was more oriented towards transsexuals than crossdressers and that's when I encountered my first Trans-Nazi.

Except for the girl who carpooled to Philly with me, I knew nobody at the convention, so I tried to be outgoing and make new friends and acquaintances at the convention.

When I sat down at a random table for our first luncheon, I introduced myself to everyone at the table. Most of the girls responded in kind, but a couple gave me the cold shoulder; they were a couple of post-op transsexuals with bleached blond hair and lots of plastic surgery (they must have used the same plastic surgeon because they looked like twins, although they were not related). They ignored everyone else at the table and eventually, we gave up trying to be social with them and ignored them in kind.

They were the first, but not the last Trans-Nazis I encountered at the convention. "No respect for you," was their unspoken refrain.

I met a lot of nice friendly people at the IFGE convention, both transsexual and non-transsexual, but the attitude of the Trans-Nazis in attendance was a turn-off.

Did they think they were better women than me because they cut off their penises and ingested hormones?

The Trans-Nazi phenomena was an eye-opener. I always thought we were all sisters in the same boat and should help each other traveling through troubled waters, but some of our sisters would just as soon dump some of us off the side without a life preserver.

I encountered my first Trans-Harpy after this blog began attracting attention. A Trans-Harpy is a Trans-Nazi who writes a blog or comments on other people's blogs (usually anonymously).

The Trans-Harpies are worse than the Trans-Nazis; whereas a Trans-Nazi will just ignore non-post-op transgenders, the Trans-Harpy verbally abuses non-post-op transgenders with hateful words. 

Shame on them!

I try to live and let live. As long as you don't tread on me or my loved ones, live your life as you will and let me live mine.

Why Would Anyone Want To Be A Woman?

Reading "Why I Decided To Become A Woman" yesterday reminded me of an encounter I had with an old friend last May at the Dayton Hamvention.

At Dayton, I sought out old ham radio friends and acquaintances in order to come out to them.

One friend, who I had known for over 30 years was pleased to see me once he recognized me en femme.

He listened attentively to my story. Then he asked some questions, which I answered.

Finally he said to me, "Why would anyone want to be a woman?"

My jaw dropped. I felt like everything I had said to him had gone in one ear and out the other.

It was not a choice. I didn't decide one day that I needed a change of pace and would become a woman. I didn't decide to become transgender to spice up my life.

Life would be so much easier if I was not transgender... if I was not a woman who found herself in a male body.

Like Joy Ladin wrote, "There’s nothing so bad about being a man... as long as you’re a man.”

I'm certainly not a man. That explains why I feel uncomfortable when en homme, but at ease when en femme. 

And so it goes.  

Why I Decided To Become A Woman

And what’s so bad about being a man?

Good reading!

A Huffington Post excerpt from "Through the Door of Life: A Jewish Journey Between Genders" by Joy Ladin [University of Wisconsin Press, $26.95]

Time Flies

It seems like I just finished my Christmas shopping and here it is, March 5, with less than four weeks to go before the big T event of the year in this part of the world.

On the evening of Saturday, March 31, I will be attending the annual Connecticut Outreach Society (COS) banquet at the Four Points Sheraton in the Meriden, CT with about 75 other trans ladies and their guests.

I bought a new evening gown and pair of shoes for the event. I picked out the song I will perform during the entertainment portion of the banquet. And I mailed in my check to confirm my registration. So, I am all set and look forward to the gala gal affair.

I hope you will join me at the banquet; I guarantee that you will have a great time. For more information and a downloadable registration form, visit the COS website and click on the big red link.

I'd Order A "Pink Lady"

How High?!

Have you noticed how high heels are getting higher?

I am not one to shy away from high heels. Typically, 3 or 4-inch heels adorn my feet.

Last year, I joined ShoeDazzle, which is a book-of-the-month club for shoes. Since I joined, most of their heels have hovered around the 4-inch mark, but as spring approached, I noticed that their heels were getting higher.

On March 1st, I received an e-mail (like I do the first of every month) revealing my ShoeDazzle selections for March. I was taken aback by the heel height of some of the selections, particularly the shoe named "Privy" (see photo) with its 5.5-inch heel.

ShoeDazzle notes that "measurements are approximate and may vary by size." The larger the shoe size, the higher the heel, which means in my size (the largest that ShoeDazzle offers), Privy's heel is probably 7 inches or more!

I cannot imagine walking in shoes with a 7-inch heel, but I am tempted to order the shoe just to see how really high it is.

Shooting Yourself

I understand that some transgirls take photos of themselves when they are en femme!

Really! Did you ever hear of such a thing?*

Seriously, I take photos of myself en femme nearly every time I femulate. I do it for two reasons:

1. To feed this blog. (The blog is hungry for photos and it must be fed.)

2. To see if my femulation is good, bad, or in-between. (Photos are more revealing than a mirror.)

Self photography is an art. I probably discard half the self-photos I take because there is something technically wrong with them (usually related to focus, framing and/or lighting).

Having tinkered with self-photography for over 40 years, I could write forever on the topic, but why re-invent the wheel when somebody already invented it.

Jennine Jacob, founder of the Independent Fashion Bloggers, wrote How to Take Gorgeous Self Portraits. She uses the same cameras as I do, so I can attest to the truth of what she wrote. At the end of her post are links to other related posts that you can provide additional help.

Have Fun!

* Which reminds me of a joke: How many transgirls does it take to change a light bulb? The answer is three. One to climb the ladder to change the light bulb, one to steady the ladder, and one to take photos of the event.

Does it come in his size?

Andrej Pejic Offered Lead Role in French Film

Read all about it here.

The “Other” Man

Yesterday, I wrote about women who are comfortable (to one degree or another) with their men dressing like a woman.

Although it is rare to find a woman who is ok with a femulating partner, it is easy to find women who are ok with other men dressing like women (as long as the femulating men are not "their" men).

I run into this all the time. When I encounter a female stranger and she discovers that I am en femme, in the majority of cases, she is fine with it. Often, she is very interested and even enthusiastic about it. Seldom do I get a negative reaction.

Those who are positive about my femulation say something to the effect that what I am doing is "wonderful." Yes, I have actually heard the word "wonderful" more than once from such enthusiasts.

And I don't look a gift horse in the mouth and ask, "What do you mean by that?"

Instead, I just go with the flow.

I can understand why a woman would not want her man to femulate, but I don't understand why women are ok and even enthusiastic about other men being en femme. Not that there is anything wrong with it, but it's a mystery wrapped in a riddle inside an enigma!

Womanless Gal Ares

Denham Springs (LA) High School "girls."

Bearded heavyweight class in Fredericksburg, Iowa.

"Miss Dawg" contest an unknown Texas high school circa 2008.

Thank you Aunty Marlena for the first two and Uncle Google for the last one.

Couples Dressing Like Girls

This is old news from last August about a celebrity couple who dress like girls.

I was clueless about the "celebrity" of the couple and had to look them up and they still mean nothing to me, but that is not important.

What is important is that the story is an example of a woman who is ok with her man dressing like a woman.

Admittedly, he is not fully femulating and this might have been a one shot visit to the wild side because I cannot find any other photos of the guy in feminine attire. So, go figure.

Anyway, I don’t know many women who are ok with their men dressing like women.

The first time I encountered such a woman was at an IFGE convention I attended a few years ago in Philly. At the opening of the convention, I noticed a couple impeccably dressed in matching skirt suits. He was tall and she was petite and I wondered where they found matching outfits, but throughout the convention, they appeared in new matching outfits each day and each evening.

I was a little jealous. The wife was one in a million and I wish mine was a little bit like her. But I got over it.

Since then, I have encountered other similar couples, that is, women who are comfortable (to one degree or another) with their transwomen partner.

And it's getting better all the time.

In general, the younger generations are more accepting of transgender. It is not a big deal breaker as it is in older generations (like mine).

And so it goes.

Watching Oscar

I am watching the Academy Awards shows tonight and will be posting my trans-fashionista comments here until the end (mine, not necessarily the shows').

19:16 EST: Switching between the red carpet shows on E! and TV Guide Network (TVGN). E! has a better staff than TVGN except for the glaring exception of transgender-bashing Kelly Orbourne. How does someone who dresses like her get off dishing on the way anyone else dresses? I hope her 15 minutes is over soon.

19:22 EST: I much like Rose Byrne's black sequins evening gown.

19:27 EST: I also much like the evening gowns worn by Jennifer Lopez, Stacy Keibler, and Milla Jovovich.

 19:34 EST: Is it just me or was Bridesmaids overrated? If it wasn't for the feces jokes, that film would have been a blip on the radar that would have faded long ago. Personally, I found the feces jokes disgusting and not amusing.

19:41 EST: I also much like Leslie Mann's evening gown.

20:01 EST: What the... I assumed the Awards show would start at 8 PM like it has for the past 45 years! Wrong! It starts at 8:30. At that rate, I may fall asleep before Billy Crystal finishes his opening act.

20:15 EST: Having seen most of the outfits worn by the stars tonight, the outfit I would most like to femulate in is Rose Byrne's black sequins evening gown.

20:23 EST: On the other hand, I loved Midnight in Paris. I watched it for the first time last night and it is right up there with my favorite Woody films, like Annie and Hannah.

20:44 EST: Billy Crystal's opening act was the same time-proven shtick he used for hosting the Oscars in the past.

21:22 EST: The Wizard of Oz focus group was very funny. (Love those flying monkeys!)

21:51 EST: I'm running out of gas --- next commercial and I may call it quits.

21:54 EST: Ben Stiller represents nepotism at its greatest. I think his parents are talented, but Ben... not so much.

22:07 EST: Christopher Plummer wins the Best Supporting Actor award. I will always remember his excellent femulation in The Silent Partner.

22:22 EST: My eyes are getting sleepy.

22:30 EST:  My fave Woody wins for Best Screenplay (for Midnight in Paris)! Hurray! On that positive note, I am going to bed.

Getting Altered

My favorite blog in the guiding-us-to-be-better-women category is Ginger Burr's Enpowering Your Inner Beauty & Personal Fashion. She always has great advice and this week, she touched on a subject that hits home (mine for sure and maybe yours too). Here is the link to the post, "The Myth of Ready-to-Wear" in which Ginger discusses clothing alterations.

By the way, I avoid alterations by never buying anything that needs alterations (if I can help it). If it does not look right on me, I leave it on the rack outside the dressing room.

Online/mail order purchases are a little more problematical. Sending stuff back is a drag and I have had alterations performed on online/mail order purchases to avoid the return process.

If you are in the neighborhood (central Connecticut) and need someone to do alterations, I highly recommend Perretta's Tailor Shop in Wallingford. The tailor does great work and she has no problem working with girls like us.

From the school that brings you Miss Eng'g...

Femulate readers are familiar with the Miss Eng'g (Engineering) womanless beauty pageant at the College of Engineering, University of Philippines-Diliman.

News from the University is that "for the first time in the student council elections history of the University of the Philippines in Diliman, a candidate is running against two fraternity men and a woman to become the first transgender Chairperson of UP Diliman’s University Student Council (USC).

"Speaking before hundreds of supporters at the historical Palma Hall Steps, Gabriel Paolo 'Heart' Diño vowed to bring genuine change in UP Diliman if she’s given the chance to win as USC Chairperson.

"'I came here not only to speak about what changes we want in our University Student Council. I also stand before you to remind that you, yourselves, are the change this university and this nation needs,' Diño said."

Read the rest of the story at Citizen Media Blog Watch.

Beware of the Girl Scouts

(This post originated as an e-mail I received today from Daily Kos. I edited it to conserve words, but I am sure you will get the message.)

There is a new evil spreading throughout our land: the Girl Scouts.

Because the Girl Scouts do not denounce birth control, non-Christians, or the LGBT community, a growing number of wingnuts have decided that the youth organization promotes abortion, paganism and "homosexual lifestyles." Some churches have even begun kicking out Girl Scout troops:

“Several Girl Scout troops in Chantilly, Va., have been banned from meeting at a local Catholic church and a neighboring school.”

The anti-Girl Scout fringe also has at least one elected official on its side: Indiana Republican State Rep. Bob Morris refused to vote for a resolution celebrating the 100th anniversary of the Girl Scouts because after "talking to some well-informed constituents" and conducting "a small amount of web research," he determined that the Girl Scouts are a "tactical arm of Planned Parenthood" that encourages "homosexual lifestyles."

Don't let social conservatives smear the Girl Scouts for promoting tolerance, diversity and responsible education. Click here to add your name to the petition supporting the Girl Scouts.

Thanks for all you do,
Chris Bowers, Daily Kos

Transwomen in Revolt

Sometimes this blog almost writes itself; the words seem to appear on the tips of my fingers. Other times, you readers send me so much stuff (thank-you), that you practically write the blog for me!

This is one of those times.

Karen sent me a link to 10 gorgeous women (who were born men).

"Students at a leading university have been told not to dress in drag in case it offends transgender people" from The Telegraph via Gwen.

Also from The Telegraph via Gwen is this story: "Five-year-old boy lives as girl in youngest case of Gender Identity Disorder."

Gwen also sent a link to this blog post from The Independent: "Blurring the gender line: When the frock just won’t fit" by LaJohn Joseph.

LaJohn mentions Jackie Curtis in that post, which reminds me that coincidentally, I just ordered Women in Revolt from Blockbuster. The film stars "Warhol's infamous trinity of queens," that is, Jackie Curtis, Candy Darling, and Holly Woodlawn.

According to IMDB, "This film is a satire of the women's liberation movement, staring a trio of female impersonators. Candy is an aloof heiress caught in an unhappy relationship with her brother. Jackie is a virginal intellectual who believes women are oppressed in contemporary American society. And Holly is a nymphomaniac who has come to loathe men, despite her attraction to them. Together, they join a militant feminist group, P.I.G. (Politically Involved Girls), but their newfound liberation doesn't make them any happier."

I've seen many Warhol films, but somehow I missed this one.

Starla's College Stars

For months, Starla has been searching online for photos of femulations in school yearbooks. Her efforts have uncovered loads of high school femulations, but recently she found photos of college "girls" in old yearbooks from institutes of higher learning (and higher femulation). I am happy to present her best discoveries (so far) here.

Mount Olive College, TN, 1988

Stetson University, Deland, FL, 1984

Stetson University, Deland, FL, 1986

Stetson University, Deland, FL, 1986

Stetson University, Deland, FL, 1986

Stetson University, Deland, FL, 1986

William Carey College, Hattiesburg, MS, 1982

Grayson Perry Interviewed

Artist Grayson Perry is one of my heroes because he does not hide being trans. Rather, he is completely open about the fact that he has a feminine persona (named "Claire').

The Art Newspaper interviewed Grayson on Friday. Here is the link.

Thank you, Anonymous, for alerting me about the interview

The Opposite Sex

When I do outreach, one question that often comes up is which sex is attractive to me.

Since I look, walk, talk, and behave exactly like a woman, the expected answer is "men," so when I say I prefer women, the audience is thrown for a loop .

Your mileage may vary, but most of the transfolks I do outreach with are attracted to their same gender, that is, the male-to-female transfolks prefer women and the female-to-male transfolks prefer men. When they changed genders, their sexuality did not change; they were still attracted to the sex they preferred before transition (which affirms the proposition that sex and gender are separate issues).

On the other hand, I know transfolks who not only change genders, but also change teams after they transition, that is, transwomen who preferred men and transmen who preferred women.

But most of the transfolks I know personally do not change teams (again, your mileage may vary). I admit that I know more crossdressers than transsexuals, still, most of the transsexuals I know personally did not change teams either.

Getting back to me (isn't it always about "me"): I prefer women... always did. Not that there is anything wrong with it, but sex with a man never interested me.

However, I have never had sex when en femme. My spouse will have nothing to do with me when I am en femme and since I am committed to my marriage, I have never sought sex outside of it.

But don't think it has not crossed my mind.

Sex en femme with a woman is very attractive, but that is a moot point because I have never encountered a woman who seemed "that" interested in my femulated self.

On the other hand, sex en femme with a man would be a piece of cake. I have encountered numerous men interested in my femulated self. Some were "tran admirers," some were not. In either case, I rejected their advances because I was a good girl, faithful to my spouse to the end.

But since my spouse will have nothing to do with my femulated self, does that give me license to seek sex outside the marriage when I am en femme? Should I give into the advances of those guys who desire me? And if I did give in, should I have sex like other woman (if you know what I mean)?

Hollywood En Femme

Sascha Brastoff

Being a liberal, I read Salon every day.

Being a film fan, I read "My Tryst with Spencer Tracy" on Salon the other day.

The Spencer Tracy article was an excerpt "from Scotty Bowers' controversial new memoir, Full Service (written with the help of Lionel Friedberg), about working as a sexual fixer in Hollywood."

The article revealed that Tracy was bisexual and that his not-so-secret love affair with actress Katherine Hepburn was a publicity stunt to cover up Tracy's bisexuality and Hepburn's lesbianism.

After reading another excerpt on Amazon, I bought the Kindle version of the book and began reading it with the Mac Kindle reader application.

It is a page-turner and I have not been able to put the book down. If you are a film fan, especially films of the 1940s, 1950s, and 1960s, I think you will find the book very interesting. It is a no-holds-barred exposé of the sexual exploits of the Hollywood stars and celebrities of that era.

Naturally, I was curious if there were any trans stars mentioned in the book.

There was not one word about Jeff Chandler or Dan Dailey, but the book did mention that FBI director J. Edgar Hoover "got dressed up in drag" during a visit to Hollywood" and a "lot of fun was had by all…"

The book also mentions the crossdressing exploits of costume designer Sascha Brastoff. "When Sascha was in drag he looked, walked, talked, and behaved exactly like a woman. You simply could not tell that he was a man."

And so it goes.

TGICF

Transform for a Better America

With unemployment at 8.3% nationwide, the Obama administration yesterday announced a new program to reduce unemployment.

During the recession, male workers were hit harder than their female counterparts. And during the recovery, females have been more successful at finding jobs than males. In fact, the rate of unemployment among males has worsened during the recovery, while females have made great gains. It is the positive job growth of the females that is responsible for bringing down the unemployment rate from its peak of 10% in October 2009.

That being the state of the nation's work environment, the administration is laying out plans to feminize unemployed male workers in order to make them more attractive candidates for the jobs that are out there.

In her announcement about the new program, Labor Secretary Hilda Solis stated, "Let me make this clear: we are not urging males to have sex reassignment surgery, but we are suggesting that unemployed males seriously consider crossdressing on a full-time basis in order to get jobs."

In addition to putting unemployed males back to work as women, the economy will be stimulated by a surge in the retail sales of women's products and services by the new full-time "women." This surge will also create new employment opportunities in the retail sector.

“It’s a win-win situation!” Solis suggested, “The guys who become gals will be shopping their hearts out for a new wardrobe. Sales will boom and retailers will have to hire new salespeople to handle the demand. So why not hire guys to be their new salesgirls?”

Solis estimates that 7 to 8 million males can be feminized and employed during the next six months and that the success of this program will stimulate an additional 14 to 16 million males to be feminized over the following year. This will bring the unemployment rate down to about 5.5%.

Women are encouraged to help feminize their unemployed males and they will be assisted by a new government pamphlet titled "Transform Your Male to Female for a Better America." The Labor Deportment will also establish Feminization Training Facilities (FTFs) in 73 cities throughout the US, which will offer a free one-week course for male-to-female trainees.

Visit the Deportment of Labor's website for more information.

Wondering on Woden's Day

Claire Delilah Jane has an interesting post on her blog about "compulsive crossdressing."

Janie's thoughts were provoked by something she read elsewhere proposing that crossdressing was a compulsion on par with pornography.

I recommend reading what Janie has written and then read what moved her to write what she did.

***

After all is said and done, if crossdressing is a compulsion, what is its root cause?

I will admit that I am probably "compulsive" about crossing genders. It is always on my mind and has always been on my mind as long as I can remember.

From what I can tell, I am the same person en homme or en femme. I don't intentionally act butch when en homme and I don't intentionally act feminine when en femme. I am what I am either en homme or en femme. But when I am en femme, I feel comfortable, natural, and happy.

So, I guess I am compulsive about being happy, feeling natural, and being comfortable in my own skin.

Is there anything wrong with that?

***

On a lighter note, Femulate reader Shannon made me smile by e-mailing a link to Sunday's installment of Sherman's Lagoon.

I hope it will make you smile, too.

Valentine’s Day Surprise

My daughter is my biggest supporter and for Valentine’s Day, she asked me to pick out any pair of shoes that I want from the JustFabulous online collection of woman’s shoes.

Like father, like daughter --- we both love high heels and her heel collection is catching up with mine!

I wish all my readers a Very Femulating Valentine’s Day!

A Single Girl's Best Friend

On Friday, the Post Office delivered my latest dress purchase from Ideeli. I tried it on and it was a perfect fit, but I had a hard time pulling up the zipper in the back of the dress.

The zipper’s pull tab was tiny and hard to grip and no one else was home to help me.

I had this problem in the past with another dress and rigged up a “zipper helper” to do the job. So it was time to get out my zipper helper again.

My zipper helper is simply a piece of string and a big safety pin.

I attach the safety pin to the zipper pull tab, loop the string through the closed safety pin, and pull the thread up to close the zipper.

I see now that they sell zipper helpers online and here are instructions to build your own.

So, keep on zippin'.

Valentine's Day Shopping

Miss Lutz

For years, a continuing sub-sub-plot on NBC’s 30 Rock is that J. D. Lutz (played by John Lutz) is a tran. Last night's episode moved this up another notch.

Lutz is lonely on Valentine's Day. He receives advice on how to pick up women from the characters played by Tracy Morgan and Judah Friedlander.

One ridiculous strategy they offer is to go to a woman's clothing store, change the label on a size 6 swimsuit to a size 12, wait for a woman to try on the mislabeled swimsuit, and when the unsuspecting woman becomes upset because the size 12 swimsuit does not fit, Lutz should approach the woman and say, "Hey, Baby, what's wrong?" The woman will be so appreciative of his sympathy that she will be his.

Desperate Lutz follows this advice, goes to a woman's clothing store, and sticks a size 6 label over a size 12 label on a swimsuit. Problem is that a saleswoman sees him at the swimsuit rack and asks if he needs assistance.

The saleswoman's asks, "Are you shopping for someone? Do you know what size she is?"

Lutz is so nervous, he is unable to answer her questions.
She misinterprets Lutz nervousness and with a knowing smile indicates that she understands. "It's OK, I have an uncle who uses my discount here all the time."

In the next scene, Lutz is trying on a one-piece woman's swimsuit and exclaims, "I'll take it."

You can view the episode here; the swimsuit scene starts at the 29-minute mark.

Five on the Sixth

As I wrote Monday, things have been very hectic around here lately; so much so that I missed Femulate's fifth birthday, which was Monday.

So belated Happy Birthday to the blog!

Betty Luke

I love the ABC situation comedy Modern Family. The writing is smart and the show is hilarious. And last night's episode had a transgender subplot.

At about 15 minutes into the episode, teenage sisters Haley and Alex are bickering, which is their usual wont. Younger brother Luke intervenes by saying that his big sisters should not fight.

The sisters stop fighting, Luke leaves the room, and one sister remarks to the other that their little sister, Betty Luke, has not been around in awhile.

"I'll get the bra and tennis balls and you get the lipstick," says Haley.

The scene ends with Luke complaining loudly.

The episode continues with other sub-plots, but at the very end of the show as the credits roll, there is a commotion in the living room. Parents Claire and Phil enter the living room to see what was the matter.

The sisters are flittering around brother Luke, who is now en femme.

Claire complains, "You girls are in trouble… for not cleaning up the mess you made."

The sisters leave the room and Claire and Phil approach Luke with a camera in hand to take photos of Betty Luke. Claire mentions that there was something wrong with the previous Betty Luke photos.
Phil says, "Betty Luke, it's nice to see you again."

The above quotations are from memory, so don't hold me to them, but they are a good approximation of what was said. The episode ("Me? Jealous?") is now viewable here.

A CD B&B

When I posted an image labeled "Casa Susanna" in The Femulated slot on Tuesday, Linda e-mailed me asking about the story behind the image.

Casa Susanna was basically a bed and breakfast for crossdressers located in the Catskills of New York State during the 1960s.

It was operated by a husband and wife, he, a crossdresser named Susanna and she, a famed wig maker from NYC named Marie. Before Casa Susanna, they ran a similar establishment, the Chevalier D’Eon Resort, which was also in the Catskills.

Chevalier D’Eon Resort was the site of the adventures of Darrell Raynor, as documented in his 1968 book A Year Among the Girls.

Raynor’s book was the first book I ever encountered on the subject of crossdressing. At the time, I was a teenager and it took three trips to the store before I got up the nerve to buy the book. I will never forget the smirk on the face of the saleswoman, who rang up my purchase. I wanted to hide under a rock, but instead I took the book home and read it from cover-to-cover that night.

The book was such an eye-opener for a young tran like me. Back then there was next to no information available on the subject unless you frequented the right (wrong) bookstores or received mail wrapped in plain brown paper. So, I was amazed that there were adults dressing up and socializing as women!

Raynor never mentioned the name of the CD B&B he wrote about, nor did he mention exactly where it was located, but he gave a few clues and my guess was that it was located in the Poconos of Pennsylvania. I was very surprised to learn decades later that the CD B&B was just a short trek across the state line smack dab in an area where I worked for a six-week stint way back when.

During my six-week stay in Upstate New York, I visited the local lingerie shop and was fitted for a classic all-in-one by the older woman who ran the shop and knew her business. After the fitting, she was proud of her handiwork and commented that I had a great figure.

I was running a one-person quick-print shop and next door was a dress shop also run by an older woman. After six weeks, we became friendly, but I did not take advantage of our friendship and ask to try on her wares because I was worried that the guy I worked for might find out.

But I digress.

I filed Raynor's CD B&B in the back of mind. I came back to mind in 2005, when the book titled Casa Susanna came to be.

According to Amazon, "Some time ago, while at a New York flea market, inveterate collectors Michael Hurst and Robert Swope discovered a large body of snapshots: album after aged album of well-preserved images, taken roughly between the mid-50s and mid-60s, depicting a group of cross-dressers united around a place called Casa Susanna, a rather large and charmingly banal Victorian-style house in small-town New Jersey [sic]. The inhabitants, visitors, guests, and hosts used it as a weekend headquarters for a regular 'girl’s life.' Someone—probably 'Susanna' or the matriarch—nailed a wonder board on a tree proclaiming it 'Casa Susanna,' and thus a Queendom was born.

"Through these wonderfully intimate shots—perhaps never intended to see the light of day outside the sanctum of the 'house'—Susanna and her gorgeous friends styled era-specific fashion shows and dress-up Christmas and tea parties. As gloriously primped as these documentary snaps are, it is in the more private and intimate life at Casa Susanna, where the girls sweep the front porch, cook, knit, play Scrabble, relax at the nearby lake and, of course, dress for the occasion, that the stunning insight to a very private club becomes nothing less than brilliant and awe inspiring in its pre-glam, pre-drag-pose ordinariness and nascent preening and posturing in new identities. It is not glamour for the stage but for each other, like other women who dress up to spend time with friends, flaunting their own sense of style. There is an evident pleasure of being here, at Casa Susanna, that is a liberation, a simplification of the conflicts inherent in a double life."

For more information about Casa Susanna, I invite you to read Zagria's blog post on the topic, which was the source of some of the history mentioned above.

2007 Miss Eng'g Womanless Pageant

2007 IE Club's
Miss Eng'g Contestant

Femulate proudly presents the excellent femulations from the 2007 edition of the The Miss Eng'g (Engineering) womanless beauty pageant at the College of Engineering, University of Philippines-Diliman.

Again, thank you, Oak for the links.

Candidates (Click on the department name in the left column.)

Preliminaries 1

Preliminaries 2

Preliminaries 3

Preliminaries 4

Pageant 1

Pageant 2

Pageant 3

Pageant 4

Femulate Reviewed

This old blog gets reviewed by this new blog.

Weekend Washouts

My blogging this weekend and last was limited.

A relative took up permanent residence in a convalescent home and my wife and I are her only living responsible relatives. (There are two other living relatives, but one is residing in the same convalescent home and the other is totally irresponsible.) As a result, my wife and I spent the last two weekends emptying my relative's apartment.

When we weren't dealing with that, we were catching up with other matters that were neglected while we were dealing with that. As a result, the blog took a hit the past two weekends in case you didn't notice.

I promise to return to our normally scheduled programming ASAP. Meanwhile, I leave you with this item from Daily Makeover: 10 Ways to Look Instantly Sexier!

Overdressing vs. Passing

Dear Stana.

Even though I pass very well and I get flattering comments from both guys and other T-girls, this is only when I am at a T-girl club. Outside of the club, I always 'know' that I am not a natural female and this reflects in my looking nervous; in turn, the lack of confidence then makes me more easy to read!
 
I also go for a glamorous look, which once again, is great at a T-girl club, but natural girls don't wear heels and a glamorous dress to buy a quart of milk. But without the glamorous additions, I feel less female and more drab and therefore, more easily read. I also hate looking dowdy as a girl as the fun (to me anyway) is dressing up and looking 'sparkly' and glamorous. Else wise, I might as well stay a boy!
 
I know this is all due to confidence, but it would be lovely to just be Emma and go out to lunch without all the worry. If you have any ideas to reduce the anxiety then that would be great.

Regards,

Emma

***

Dear Emma,

Been there, done that, and still doing that!

I don't dress glamouously unless the occasion calls for it, but I do dress very nicely (heels, dress, jewelry, makeup, etc.) when I go out. As a result, I sometimes am overdressed for the venue in which I find myself.

Like you, I worried that overdressing was a dead giveaway that I was a tran. So I avoided going places when I was overdressed, which in effect, kept me out of a lot of places.

Six years ago, I was dressed to the nines (very sparkly) to attend a Christmas party. On the way to the party, I realized that I forgot to buy munchies for the party (all the attendees were supposed to bring some food or drink to share).

There was a Stop & Shop in the neighborhood where I could buy something. I was way overdressed for Stop & Shop, but I convinced myself that I had a perfect excuse for being overdressed. Also, I recalled in the past seeing other overdressed women in Stop & Shop while (I assumed) they were on their way to or from a wedding or graduation or some other dressy event (or maybe they were trans, too).

Although my confidence was shaky, my mind was set and I went into Stop & Shop, picked out some baked goods, paid the cashier, and was out the door without an issue. No one paid any special attention to me, no one pointed at me, no one laughed at me. It was all so anti-climactic.

That episode did wonders for my confidence. After that I stopped worrying about being "overdressed." I go where I please and if I think about it, I just tell myself that I am an appropriately dressed office girl running an errand for the boss or somesuch excuse.

You say, "you pass very well," so that just makes it easier.

So just do it --- after a few forays out in the real world, you will be amazed how confident and comfortable you will feel.

You go, girl!

Stana

***
Need advice concerning femulation, then e-mail me and I will happily give you my opinion on the matter. My e-mail address is stana-stana at sbcglobal.net.

Thought for the Day

In my next life, I want to come back as Blake Lively’s only child.

Do You Wear Panties Under Shapewear?

Dear Stana,

You have a fabulous figure and I recall you mentioning in the past that you wear shapewear to achieve those curves.

Recently, I have been thinking about adding shapewear to my femulation repertoire and I wonder "Do you wear panties under your shapewear?"

Love Your Blog,

Daisy

***

Dear Daisy,

I wear panties under my shapewear, although the shapewear manufacturers' claim that panties are not necessary "because they all make shapewear with a cotton crotch or an accessible crotch."

That being said, I wear panties to help manage my boy parts down under. I tuck and the panties help keep the tucked parts in place.

I have had less success maintaining tucks wearing shapewear without panties, although your mileage may vary.

I hope that helps!

Stana

***

Need advice concerning femulation, then e-mail me and I will happily give you my opinion on the matter. My e-mail address is stana-stana at sbcglobal.net.

Riff Raff's Big 7-0

Let me say up front that I am not a fan of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I watched the film once on television long ago and found that it was not my cup of tea (pun intended).

As a result, when Zagria featured its creator on her blog, I did not pay much attention to it. "Richard O'Brien --- who's he?" I thought to myself and moved on.

As a result, I missed the fact that the creator of The Rocky Horror Picture Show is transgender. “There is a continuum between male and female. Some are hard-wired one way or another, I’m in between,” O’Brien revealed in an interview.

Also, I did not realize that O’Brien had a role in the Rocky Horror film.

Mea culpa.

Anyway, Richard O'Brien will be celebrating his 70th birthday next month and Penny, one of my readers in New Zealand, kindly informed me that there will be a big birthday bash for Richard in Hamilton, NZ on March 17 and attendees are encouraged to "dress delightfully."

Why Hamilton?

According to Penny, “Richard O'Brien spent his formative years in Hamilton,and says he based The Rocky Horror Picture Show  on the movies he watched in one of our old cinemas when he was a impressionable teenager.”

Here is a link to a pertinent webpage and Facebook page.

I wish I could attend, but it is a bit of a drive.

Trans Femme Invisibility

Alexis Meade (Rebecca Romijn) of TV's Ugly Betty

Megan Evans wrote on The Huffington Post about suffering from "femme invisibility."

Megan is a "femme," which is a term for a feminine-looking lesbian.

If you are a "femme," the world assumes you are heterosexual because you do not match the stereotypical image of a lesbian, i.e., "short hair, no makeup, wearing baggy jeans and a t-shirt." The problem is two-pronged: it is difficult to attract other lesbians and you have to ward off heterosexual males because other lesbians and heterosexual males assume you are heterosexual.

The crux of her post is how to overcome femme invisibility?

She suggests that some relief has come from the fact that "the representation of lesbians has risen on TV. In particular, there has been an influx of femme lesbian characters." Additional relief has come from femme celebrities, who have come out as gay like "Portia de Rossi, up-and-coming actress Amber Heard, Miss California hopeful Mollie Thomas, and country singer Chely Wright."

Also, she launched a Femme Visibility campaign on her "blog, What Wegan Did Next, with the simple plan of inviting femme lesbians to send in their photos and together take a step toward shattering stereotypes and pulling off our invisibility cloak."

After reading Megan's post, I realized that femme lesbian transwoman also suffer from "femme invisibility." We are unable to attract other lesbians and we have to ward off heterosexual males because other lesbians and heterosexual males assume we are heterosexual.

If you are a happily married femme transwoman (like I am), the inability to attract other lesbians is a good thing, but we still have to deal with heterosexual males who are on the make.

Television is not much help. TV transwomen come in two flavors: the men in dresses (à la Work It) and the drag queens (à la Ru Paul's Drag Race). The handful of trans femmes on TV have been so short-lived (the average trans femme character lasts one episode of a TV show) that they have not made much of an impact on the public's image of a transwoman. They still think we are either men in dresses or drag queens.

I don't have a solution. More femme transwomen characters on TV and in film might help. And more femme transwomen coming out as lesbians might help, too, but who knows?

We have enough trouble coming out as transwomen; coming out as lesbian transwomen might be pushing the envelope too much too soon. Maybe one step at a time is the way to go; first step: gender, second step: sexuality.  

By the way, when a guy comes on to me, I usually manage to dissuade him off by pointing at my wedding ring.

2006 Miss Eng'g Womanless Pageant

Lots of links and photos for the 2006 edition of the pageant:

Candidates (1)

Candidates (2)

Candidates (3) 

Preliminaries (1) 

Preliminaries (2) 

Preliminaries (3)  

Preliminaries (4) 

Pageant (1) 

Pageant (2)

Again, our thanks go out to Femulate reader Oak for the links.