It is still March and this is New England, but this weather is ridiculous. Snow Monday, snow last night! The forecast for Saturday night — Banquet Night — is "Partly cloudy, with a low around 18." That is 18° Fahrenheit, not Celsius.
I guess I will be wearing my fake fur coat to the banquet. Not that I mind wearing my "fur" — it is glamorous and so comfy, but you would think that one week into spring that some lighter outerwear would be sufficient.
The caption of today's The Femulated: image reads "Dwayne Hoover, circa 1973." It should read "Harry LeSabre, circa 1973."
(At this time, I can publish this post, but I cannot access the caption editing function, otherwise, I would have fixed the caption without publishing this post.)
And so it goes.
Just for fun, I decided to compare what I wore to the Connecticut Outreach Society banquet in the past. I was surprised to learn that I have attended 12 banquets and to see how many different looks I managed to pull off!
I hope you will enjoy the banquet photo collage I put together. It represents the following years:
• Top Row:1997, 1999, 2001, 2002
• Middle Row: 2003, 2004, 2005,2006
• Bottom Row: 2007, 2008,2009,2010
(Click on the photo to enlarge the image.)
This young man seems so happy wearing high heels even on a rainy, windswept day that I had to share his joy with you. His photos appear on the High Heels For Men blog, one blog that I visit every day.
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| After my makeover before last year's banquet. |
Connecticut Outreach Society's annual banquet is Saturday evening. It is the biggest trans social event of the year in these parts and draws 50 to 75 trans people, their supporters, partners, admirers, etc. every year. A good time is had by all.
This year's after-dinner speaker is Ethan St. Pierre. I have not seen or heard from Ethan since Fantasia Fair, so I am looking forward to seeing him on Saturday.
I also look forward to seeing my favorite fashion consultant, Patty, before the banquet. She lives near the hotel and if our schedules are in sync, I usually stop by before the event to show off the results of her advice.
When I was less outgoing a few years ago, the banquet was a very big event for me. It was a rare opportunity to get dressed to the nines and socialize with my "girlfriends," who were similarly attired.
I was so closeted back then that I rented a room at the hotel, arrived in boy mode, and changed into girl mode in my room. When I was ready to make my way down to the banquet hall, I would look through the peep hole of my hotel room door to make sure no one was around. Then I would open the door slightly to see beyond what I could not see through the peep hole.
If all was clear, I would walk down the hall and hope that I would not encounter any civilians in the hallway or worse, in the elevator.
In the lobby, I would scurry as fast as my 4-inch heels would permit me to the banquet hall, check-in, and stay within the hall's confines until the event ended. If, heaven forbid, Mother Nature called, I would slink to the bathroom that the hotel designated for our kind of "girls."
Those days are long gone.
Now I dress at home, drive a half-hour to the hotel, walk the walk through the parking lot and lobby proudly strutting my stuff with no thought about avoiding civilians, male or female. During the banquet, I will repair to the lobby if the music is too loud to gossip with the girls and if Mother Nature calls, I use the most convenient ladies' room, not necessarily the one designated for our kind.
And the banquet is no longer the end-all and be-all event of the year for me. I am no longer stuck attending trans-only events; I relish all opportunities to really be myself out in the real world. But I still forward to the banquet to visit with friends, old and new.
I added this postcard to my female impersonator ephemera collection.
The postcard depicts the performers at New York City's 82 Club (also known as "Club 82") circa 1960. The nightclub was in the East Village at 82 East 4th St. It had a 20 year run and closed its doors for good in 1978.
"I Want To Be More Than Just A Man Or A Woman" appeared on Salon yesterday. It is a very interesting read, as are the comments that follow.
I am not sure what was the original intention of this early 20th Century postcard.
It follows the theme of the anti-suffrage propaganda, that is, if women got the right to vote, it would lead to a gender role reversal.
But the postcard makes no reference to the suffrage movement. So is it anti-marriage propaganda or simply a joke about the state of harried married males?
In any case, the male’s femulation is disappointing.
P.S. The woman in the before and after scenarios looks like the same woman, but the male looks different. In addition to wearing a dress, he looks shorter and has a mustache in the "after" scene.
There was just one loose end: a tax-related document from my employer that I did not understand and could result in me getting back less money from the government or actually owing money. I didn't lose any sleep over it, but I did lose sleep because my body clock was still confused by the switch to Daylight Saving Time. Boo!
I resolved the issue first thing this morning at work; it turned out that the document had no effect on my taxes. Yay!
Then I met with my boss for my annual review. This was my first review from this boss, who replaced my old boss last December. My review was a stinker. It was the worst review I've received since I began working for this company 13 years ago. Boo!
My previous 12 reviews were all excellent reviews, so did my work suddenly turn into garbage during the past year?
Go figure!
Aunty Marlena kindly sent me this link to an online back issue of Life magazine dated December 21, 1942. In a nutshell, it's an article about an all-male cast of soldiers en femme performing Clare Boothe Luce's all-female satire The Women.
Enjoy!
Since so many of us girls depend on online resources to shop for our feminine wardrobes, I thought Ginger's advice today was particularly relevant: Are You Stuck in an Online Fashion Rut?
I hope you find her advice useful (I did).
For what it’s worth, two years ago, Bachelors Degree Online included Femulate in its list of the "Top 100 Gender Studies Blogs." Femulate was number 11 in the "Gender Identity and Sexuality" category.
And so it goes.
Yesterday, my family took me to the casino (in boy mode) to celebrate my birthday. I had a great day and it made it less painful turning another decade on the oldometer.
One of my trans friends works at the casino (in boy mode), but I have never run into her there... until yesterday.
As soon as we arrived at the casino, I recognized her in boy mode and greeted her. She greeted me back, but I could sense that she had no clue as to who I was; it took her a few seconds before she recognized me in boy mode, then we acted like the old friends we are.
It was one of those moments that are reserved for girls like us.
Updated Saturday Morning
You have asked me to list upcoming transgender conventions.
So I compiled a list of the stateside conferences and conventions I am aware of that will occur during the next 12 months. If I missed anything, let me know.
By the way, by "conventions" I am referring to multi-day events that include a mix of educational and social events as opposed to one or two-day "conferences" that are more or less strictly educational.
Yesterday, I wrote about my plans to dress to the nines for the Connecticut Outreach Society banquet on March 26.
I also have plans to dress en femme even sooner, but my plans are a little indefinite.
On Tuesday, I become 60-something (rather than 50-something). So I am taking a few days off from work to celebrate the milestone (or is it "millstone"). And I plan to go to the Mohegan Sun casino en femme one evening during the extended weekend to celebrate, but I am not sure which evening.
I know what I am going to wear --- my new sweater dress from Vicky's (see photo), but I don't know when just yet because the weather forecast is not cooperating.
So I may have to postpone my night out until the weather is more cooperative.
The worst of winter is over. Spring is less than three weeks away. And this young (at heart) girl's thoughts are all about getting out more en femme now that the weather is compatible. (I don't know about you, but I find it daunting to drive a car with a manual transmission on icy roads while wearing 5-inch stilettos.)
March is very promising.
The local support group, Connecticut Outreach Society, hosts the transgender social event of the year in this area: their annual banquet on the 26th in Meriden. A cocktail hour, dinner, after-dinner speaker Ethan St. Pierre, awards presentations, live entertainment, and dance music provided by a DJ is an excuse for this girl to don her prettiest dress and join the fun.
I had two cocktail dresses in mind to wear to the banquet, so last night, I tried them on to decide which to wear and how to accessorize. They both looked nice, but one was not dressy enough for the "transgender social event of the year." The other was dressy enough, but I had worn it to two dressy events I attended in the fall and I did not want to be seen wearing it again so soon after those events.
So I rummaged through my wardrobe to find something else to wear. I found a dress that I bought at Dress Barn back in December 2008 that I never wore out in public because I thought it looked better on the rack than on me. But, what the hay, I tried it on.
The dress has a ribbon belt and whenever I tried it on in the past, I wore the belt. Last night I forgot about the belt and the dress looked completely different. In fact, it looked beautiful and it is the dress I will wear to the banquet.
Like I said, the banquet is the trans social event of the year in Connecticut. If you are in the area and interested in spending an evening socializing with some of the classiest ladies in the Tri-State area, consider attending the banquet. (Here is the banquet registration form.)
I hope to see you there!
Sheila from Tampa left the following comment to my Foundations of Femulation post:
Question: When you order slimming foundation garments and check the sizing charts, do you order the size indicated by your current dimensions, or do you order one size smaller (since you are hoping to have the garment give you temporary new smaller dimensions)? I will appreciate your sage advice.
My reply was that "it's complicated" and would require a whole blog post to answer her question. This post is it.
Caveat emptor: This is what works for ME; your mileage may vary.
For girdles, waist cinches, and lower torso shapewear, I get a size that is about 6 to 8 inches smaller than my natural waist measurement. On my body, the result is about half-way in between, that is, a garment that is 6 to 8 inches smaller than my waist measurement reduces my waistline by 3 to 4 inches.
It took me a long time to find the right size bra. I finally sought out expert advice.
Two separate bra fittings by professionals indicated that I should wear a bra that is about 4 inches smaller than my natural breast measurement with either a B or C cup (depending on the bra style).
Again, what works for me, may not work for you.
Photos are a "girl's" best friend.
Like many of you, I shoot photos of my femulations and have been doing so ever since I was a teen-aged "girl."
Perfectionist that I am, I use the photos to see how I can make improvements in my presentation.
Narcissist that I am, I use the photos to see how feminine I look.
Whatever the reason, I feel that there is always room for improvement in my photo modeling skills. My "good" photos often seem to be the result of pure luck.
It's true that digital camera "film" is cheap, but it would be nice to get two or three keepers out of every ten photos I shoot instead of just one. After all, I am absolutely gorgeous (LOL), so I must be doing something wrong!
I subscribe to Daily Makeover and yesterday they offered a slide show of tips of "How To Tale A Red Carpet Worthy Photo."
I thought that the tips were very useful and I am anxious to try them out during my next photo shoot. Hopefully, they will result in more consistency in the quality of my photos.
Jones sent me this cartoon from the September 1974 issue of Playboy. It made me laugh out loud; I hope you will have a good laugh, too.
I have always been voluptuous, buxom, full-figured, whatever; I have never been fashion model thin or even close to it.
So foundation garments are my friends. They shape and mold my flesh into a womanly figure to help sell my femulation.
I have been femulating for about five decades and during that time, I have tried a variety of foundation garments.
Early on, when I was borrowing lingerie from my mother, bras and girdles were my mainstays. Mom owned a variety of girdles, but stuck with one style of bra, i.e., the traditional white, shoulder-strapped, rear-fastening style.
I tried them all and had my favorites. When I began shopping for my own foundation garments, I stuck to bras and girdles like Mom owned ("like Mother, like Son").
That is until I visited a lingerie shop in Kingston, NY. The little lady who ran the shop probably had seen it all, so when I mentioned I needed some foundation garments for my Halloween costume, I don't think she believed me. However, she was very helpful and after measuring me up, she suggested a heavy-duty all-in-one and handed me two models to try on.
The first all-in-one did nothing for me, but the second one did wonders. The proprietor insisted on examining me wearing the all-in-one and after giving me the once-over, she gushed about my great girlish figure. I enjoyed the compliment, but I was a little embarrassed and could not pay and get out of the shop fast enough.
I was sold on all-in-ones and wore them until they more or less stopped selling the heavy duty models. The lighter duty models were still available, but just did not have the same molding and shaping power of the heavy duty models, so I had to find something else.
I experimented with different things and finally found a combination that approximated an all-in-one: a longline bra, a high-waisted brief girdle, and a corset-style waist cincher. That was a heavy duty combination that, at times, was uncomfortable, but it worked and I stuck with that combo for a dozen years.
Spanx came along and I was intrigued, but I did not indulge in that modern line of shapewear until Avon started selling Bali's Spanx clone. With my Avon rep discount, I decided to try a high-waisted brief.
Wow!
Shapewear had come a long way; the Bali brief did a better job than the trio of foundation garments I had been wearing. Initially, I wore longline bras with the high-waisted brief, but after getting fitted for a "Bombshell" bra at Victoria's Secret, I dumped the longline bras and began adding Bombshells to my wardrobe.
Recently, I added Bali's cami torset top to the mix. It is a cami with the front cut out to allow you to wear whatever bra you wish. Meanwhile, it smooths out your back and eliminates the back fat that has long been an issue that I thought I would never conquer.
It took a half century, but I am finally all set! I now have a very womanly figure sans hormones or surgery.
I recently discovered The Amazon Blog, "the online international fashion & lifestyle resource for tall girls and women." The last update was in May 2010, but the website has information that is still useful for tall girls like us.
Also, I have some new additions to the Famous Females of Height List:
5'9" – Amber Valletta – actress – film Hitch
5'9" – Florence Welch – singer from Florence and the Machine
5'10" – Marcia Strassman (photo right) – actress – television Welcome Back, Kotter, film Honey, I Shrunk the Kids
6'0-" – Kimora Lee Simmons – fashion model, author (source: Kathryn Mars)
6'11" – Marvadene Anderson – New Jersey high school basketball player (source: Patty Romano)
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| (Click the image to enlarge it.) |
Searching the Internet for a US President-Femulate connection, I found this piece from the December 26, 1995 edition of Weekly World News about one of my favorite presidential personalities, Dick Nixon, and his penchant for wearing women's clothing.
The article reveals that the author of a book about Nixon claims that "he has iron-clad evidence that Nixon was a transvestite --- and he even has photographs to prove it!"
The photo of Nixon in drag that accompanies the article is real bad Photoshopping. Nixon's head is not in proportion to "his" body: his head is too small/his body too big.
Except for this article, there is no reference to the purported author of the book, Malcolm Tenniper, anywhere on the Internet. His surname is so rare that I cannot find one person in the USA with the same surname listed in any telephone directory.
In my humble opinion, the story is balderdash.
Wow!!!
Seems that the College of Engineering, University of Philippines-Diliman conducts an annual womanless beauty pageant competition for the title of Miss Engg.
Viewing the portraits of the 2010 pageant contestants, I am of the opinion that the Miss Engg womanless pageant has to be one of the best, if not the best womanless pageant conducted at an educational institute, whether it be grammar school, middle school, high school, or college.
The girls' femulation is so good that it took awhile before I was sure that the girls were really guys. What finally convinced me was the set of portraits of the girls in boy mode. If all I had to look at were their evening gown and swimsuit portraits, I would still need some convincing.
The portraits are absolutely gorgeous. It is obvious that a lot of time and effort went into the portraits. Whoever was involved knew their business. (I wish I could find someone around here that could do my portrait en femme like the Miss Engg portraits!)
Anyway, without further ado, visit the Miss Engg Facebook page and/or feast your eyes on the images displayed at the following links:
• Evening gown portraits
• Swimsuit portraits
• Video game costume character portraits
• Boy mode portraits
There are also some videos on the Internet that you can find by searching for “Miss Engg” on YouTube.
Again, Wow!!!
UPDATE: Here are the images from the 2007 and 2009 installments of Miss Engg pageant.
Over the years, I have read many a transwoman's account about being thrilled when they saw their lipstick smudged on a drinking glass, coffee cup, cigarette, etc. that they recently withdrew from their mouth.
Am I the only one who is not thrilled by such a sight?
Lipstick smudges bother me in two ways.
1. I am not a germaphobe, but when I see such lipstick smudges, even my own, it grosses me out a little bit.
2. When I see my own lipstick smudges, it means that my pristine makeup application is no longer pristine and that I must repair to the ladies' room to freshen my makeup. For that reason, I try to use a drinking straw whenever I drink. In fact, I put a fresh drinking straw in my purse whenever I go out.
And so she goes!
Flickr has 215 photos online from the 45th annual Miss Fire Island (NY) Pageant that occurred on September 11, 2010.
Thank you Aunty Marlena for this find!
I am a film buff, but I had never heard of the 2010 film titled The Extra Man. I should have known about it because it stars one of my favorite living actors, Kevin Kline, along with Katie Holmes, Paul Dano, and John C. Riley. Somehow, it flew under my radar until last week when I learned that Paul Dano appears en femme in the film.
My interest was piqued, so I added the film to my Blockbuster queue.
The DVD arrived Saturday. I have not watched the whole film yet, but I fast-forwarded through the DVD to check out the transgender bits and found many pertinent scenes. There may be others because I fast-forwarded through the film very quickly and I might have missed some scenes, but here are the ones I did find:
* The Dano character peruses the trans bar advertisements in a tabloid newspaper.
* Dano goes to a trans bar and converses with a trans waitress.
* Dano has a male-to-female head-to-toe makeover.
I am not sure how these trans scenes fit into the rest of the film because I have not watched the film from beginning to end yet. According to IMDB, the story is about a man who escorts wealthy widows in New York's Upper East Side" and "takes a young aspiring playwright under his wing." Kline is the escort and Dano is the aspiring playwright.
And how it goes, I don't know yet.
Three times a charm!
This is the third time I posted this vintage Valentine's Day greeting card here (last time in 2009). Since the blog's readership has evolved and grown during the past two years ago, I am posting the card again for everyone to enjoy because it is so apropos femulation-wise. (Click on the image to magnify it and see it in its full glory.)
And Happy Saint Valentine's Day to you all!
Occasionally, I visit flickr to see what the girls are uploading there that is trans-related. A few months ago, I noticed the trans photo collages that Rebecca Hipkiss had been uploading.
I checked back a few times as her collection of collages grew. It is now quite impressive and I highly recommend it to any transperson who likes transphotos (isn't that redundant?).
withfootballplayersdressedaschorusgirls%5B4%5D.jpg "SamtheShamandthePharoahs('WoolBully')withfootballplayersdressedaschorusgirls")
Thank Goddess It’s Friday Here is an idea for a new American restaurant chain. Call it “Thank Goddess It’s Friday” and staff if with male waitresses like they do in Japan.
Which brings up the story, blogged about here a couple of times (1) (2), about the new Thai airline, PC Air, hiring transwomen as flight attendants.
PC Air made a big deal about being the first airline to hire transwomen as flight attendants “in an effort to promote equal opportunities for what's called the 'third sex in Southeast Asia.”
Maybe they are the first airline to openly hire transwomen as flight attendants, but I think it is likely that other airlines have hired transwomen (in stealth or not) as flight attendants in the past (and did not publicize it). I have no proof for that assertion, but transwomen are everywhere and I'm sure they are in the stewardess ranks, too.
This story tears me.
On the one hand, PC Air did a good thing, but on the other hand, they soiled their good deed by forcing the trans flight attendants to wear special badges so that civilians can differentiated the trans from the non-trans attendants. WTH? If they were really interested in promoting equal opportunities, PC Air should have had the trans flight attendants wear generic badges and let them blend in with the non-trans attendants.
IMHO, Andrej has moved up the gender spectrum from androgynous to transgender. Welcome to the "girls'" club, Miss Pejic!
While shopping at Ocean State Job Lot yesterday, I noticed shelves of designer postcards on sale, ten for a dollar.
Being a postcard collector, I was in heaven. Being a femulator, I was elated to find the postcard (pictured above) among the hundreds that were for sale.
The description on the back of the card reads, “Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs (‘Wooly Bully’) with football players dressed as chorus girls.”
The source of the image was a mystery.
I saw Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs perform live in concert back in the mid-1960s and I can assure you there were no football players dressed as chorus girls fronting the band.
I thought that the source of the image might be a Hollywood film, so I searched IMDB and discovered that Sam and the Pharaohs appeared in a 1965 opus titled When the Boys Meet the Girls with Connie Francis, Harve Presnell, Louis Armstrong, Liberace, and Herman's Hermits (Wow!).
I did not find the football player chorus girls image on the Internet, but I did find other images of Sam and the band from the film wearing the same outfits performing on the same stage, so I'd say “mystery solved.”
The ladies in the photo above are the four transwomen hired for the job. Left to right, they are Nathatai Sukkaset, 26, Phuntakarn Sringern, 24, Dissanai Chitpraphachin, 24, and Chayathisa Nakmai, 24.
All I have to add is that it is too bad Trans World Airlines (TWA) is no longer in business.
You go, girl!
Read and see more here on The Huffington Post.
My boss stopped by my cubicle this morning to discuss something. She was wearing a black dress, black tights, and black heels. She looked very nice.
First words out of her mouth were, "I hate sales meetings because I have to wear heels!"
I had to bite my tongue because I almost said, "I wouldn't mind."
KOGT AM radio website has photos from the 2007 Little Cypress Mauriceville Miss Honey Pageant and the 2007 West Orange-Stark High School Ms Mustang competition.
Thank you Aunty Marlena for this find!
I was a Beach Boys fan (still am). Their Beach Boys Concert was the first LP I ever bought. Eventually, I bought every LP and 45 that they released during their first 15 years of operation.
I liked most of their songs; I knew most of the lyrics by heart, but I was very self-conscious about one song — one of their big hits — In My Room.
If ever there was a song about teen transgender angst, In My Room was it. I am sure Brian Wilson did not have crossdressers in mind when he wrote the song, but almost any youth with gender issues could identify with the lyrics of that song.
There's a world where I can go
and tell my secrets to
In my room
In my room
In this world I lock out
all my worries and my fears
In my room
In my room
Do my dreaming and my scheming lie awake and pray
Do my crying and my sighing laugh at yesterday
Now it's dark and I'm alone
but I won't be afraid
In my room
In my room
In addition to being self-conscious about the song, hearing Brian Wilson singing those lyrics back in the mid-1960s was kind of embarrassing. It was such a "girly" song that you had to wonder what was going on with Brian Wilson (plenty, as it turned out, but nothing gender-related). This was the same guy who sang Surfin' Safari, Little Deuce Coupe, Shut Down, Fun, Fun, Fun, etcetera, etcetera, and now he was singing a song that you would expect a female recording artist to sing!
And his voice was girly, too! It was almost too much for a transgender kid to take.
Today is the fourth birthday of Femulate!
Over 1.7 million hits and 1675 posts later, the popularity of Femulate still amazes me (I guess I am doing something right).
Viewing Femulate's statistics, the most popular post during the past four years is a July 20, 2007 post, Feminine Skirts and Dresses For Men (with 106 comments). Almost four years later, it still leads the pack in the daily stats for this blog.
Hot on its heels is a February 3, 2009 post, 11 Stories About Cross-Dressing. It always falls just short of the number 1 spot, but it is always number 2 and ahead of number 3 by a very wide margin.
Anyway, I thank you for visiting Femulate and I hope I can continue to make this a place you will want to visit.
Best Wishes,
Stana
The weather forecast for today did not look promising (a "wintry mix"), so I was in no hurry to get up and get out of house. In anticipation of the weather, I did my normal Saturday morning chores yesterday, so I had a leisurely Saturday morning for a change.
I took advantage of the free time to try on some outfits while wearing the new shapewear camisole I purchased to deal with my back fat issues.
The cami looks too small, but it stretches to fit and smooths out my back fat. Instead of a roll of fat, my back was now flat. (By the way, my dress size is usually Misses 16 and the size XL cami fits me fine.)
I tried on a few dresses I had worn in the past where my back fat was evident and I was very pleased with the difference. I tried on a few dresses I had not worn yet and the results were the same.
Bali makes the cami. I bought it through Avon. It is similar to this one except that the one I bought through Avon (see photo) has narrower shoulder straps, no lace inserts, and was $25.
If you wish to buy the Avon version, you cannot buy it online (I searched high and low and cannot find it on their website). You will have to buy it through an Avon representative. (The cami appears in the Campaign 3 sales book as shown here.)
I am so satisfied with my purchase that I ordered a second one.
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| Transsexual model Lea T |
This story is beginning to get old, but here is Vogue.com’s take on the femimen movement in the fashion world.
I say…
Fashion is one thing, but the real world is something else. Lots of stuff that models wear on the runways never show up on the sidewalks.
Will the femimen movement be different? Will we soon see femimen on the streets of America?
Maybe.
Yesterday, I described how I became involved with outreach, that is, the process of educating the civilian population about the trans community.
Today, I will describe a typical outreach session (like the ones I have been involved with at local colleges and universities).
During the past five years, I have participated in outreaches where there was only one other person doing outreach with me and at the other extreme, with as many as ten other people, but on the average, there are about five and they usually represent a good cross-section of the trans community, that is, pre-op, post-op, no-op, male-to-female, female-to-male, etc.
When we walk into the classroom, most eyes are on us. In my the back of my mind, I think that some of the students are expecting us to look like refugees from The Jerry Springer Show (see photo). We are far from that and that is part of their education.
At every outreach I have experienced, there are always comments from students that they were surprised how average we all were, that is, average in a good way. We were not freaks --- we were just like them.
Usually the session starts with each of us presenting a short biography with emphasis on being trans. Then, the students ask us pertinent questions.
Some questions are "deeper" than others.
At one end of the spectrum are questions like "How did you choose your female name?" or "How did you learn to walk so well in high heels?"
At the other end of the spectrum are questions like "Are you happy with your male body image?" or "You dress so attractively; are you trying to attract a man or a woman?"
Sometimes I find the questions amusing like the following exchange:
Student A, "Are You married?"
Me, "Yes."
Student B, "Are you married... to a woman?"
Me, "Yes, again."
Which brings up another revelation about trans people that every outreach I have experienced encounters: that we are not necessarily gay. Going in, most of the students believe that all trans people are gay, but they go away from our sessions with the knowledge that being trans does not mean that you are also gay.
Outreach is a rewarding experience. The reward is that it gives me the opportunity to spread the truth. Hopefully, the students we reach out to learn the truth and maybe spread the word to their friends and family. And maybe someday, this slow domino effect will result in a society that has an open-mind about its transgender brothers and sisters.
What's "outreach?"
According to Wikipedia, "outreach is an effort by an organization or group to connect its ideas or practices to the efforts of other organizations, groups, specific audiences or the general public. Unlike marketing, outreach does not inherently revolve around a product or strategies to increase market share. Typically non-profits, civic groups, and churches engage in outreach.
"Outreach often takes on an educational component (i.e., the dissemination of ideas), but it is increasingly common for organizations to conceive of their outreach strategy as a two-way street. In this case outreach is also framed as engagement, rather than simple dissemination/education."
I did my first outreach in May 2006 (see photo) after being a member of Connecticut Outreach Society (COS) for over 16 years. COS has two components: to support the trans community and to educate civilians about the trans community.
When I volunteered to do outreach, I had ulterior motives. I was looking for an opportunity to go out en femme that was relatively safe, but beyond the safety net of a support group meeting.
A lot of the outreach performed by COS took place at colleges and universities. I figured that these were safe places because they usually are bastions of diversity and tolerance. So I asked to be included on the outreach team the next time COS did outreach at a college or university.
A year or two later, I also joined the Stonewall Speakers outreach team.
Colleges, universities, and other organizations contact COS or Stonewall Speakers when they have a need for outreach. Then COS or Stonewall Speakers contacts its volunteers (like me) to find out who is available to do outreach at the required time and place.
Between COS and Stonewall Speakers, I receive an assignment to do outreach about four times per year. As a result, I have done outreach at Saint Joseph College, Southern Connecticut State University, University of Connecticut, University of Hartford. and Wesleyan College. By the way, if I was not employed full-time, I would be then available for additional assignments because most occur during the weekday.
Tomorrow, I will describe what happens at outreach.
