Wishing They Weren't In Kansas Anymore

When I Was A Red

Before I discovered that I was really a blonde, I thought I was really a redhead, as shown in this May 1995 photo.

My belief in my redheadedness goes back to when I was a baby. I don't recall it myself, but my parents always claimed that I was a redhead in my very early years. (Gradually my hair color turned brown, later gray, and still later thin.)

Anyway, when I was choosing a wig color, I figured red might work since I started here as a redhead. Turned out that I liked myself as a redhead and wore various shades of red for years.

By Popular Demand

Many of you sent positive feedback regarding my vintage photograph and asked for more. So, I went through my shoebox of old photos to see if there were any other oldies that were goodies.

I found this one from December 1994, in which I was all dolled-up to attend my support group's Christmas party.

I love that dress. I think I only wore it twice. I hope it is still in storage in the attic; if so, I think I can find an occasion to wear it again.

I also like the hair style. If I can find that length and style in a lighter color, I may be sporting a new hairdo soon.

What's Good for the Goose...

I received this e-mail advertisement today:

Wouldn't it be nice to receive this e-mail advertisement tomorrow:

Housework

I put on a frilly apron this morning and did some housework around the blog. In the process, I updated the Womanless Archive web page and My Favorite Photos web page.
While I was tidying up, I wondered what you girls would like to see here in my blog. What is missing? What would you like to see more of (or less of)? Et cetera, et cetera.
All sincere suggestions will be considered. I look forward to hearing from you!

First On My List

Anne Francis died Sunday.

The 5'8' film and television actress was probably best known for her role as Honey West in the television detective series of the same name, but I will always remember her as Robby the Robot's housemate in the science fiction film classic Forbidden Planet.

Coincidentally, on the day of her death, Turner Classic Movies (TCM) showed Forbidden Planet and I happened upon it while switching channels (I did not know she had died at the time).

While watching the film, I mentioned to my family how the monster in the film had scared the bejesus out of me when I saw the film for the first time as a 5-year-old sitting in the back seat of my family's Buick Special at the local drive-in theater.

What a predicament!

Whenever the monster appeared on the big screen, I looked away. Problem was that when I looked away from the big screen, I ended up looking out the side windows of the Buick and who knew what monsters were lurking out in the blackness beyond the Buick!

Getting back to Ms. Francis. She was the first on what would turn out to be my very long list of women who I found attractive and wanted to be like. Watch Forbidden Planet and I think you will agree that she was someone to femulate. And she had Robby the Robot at her beck and call to boot!

Rest in peace, Altaira.

Scalia's Surprise: Women Don't Have Constitutional Protection Against Discrimination

UPDATED BELOW

WASHINGTON -- The equal protection clause of the 14th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution does not protect against discrimination on the basis of gender or sexual orientation, according to Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia.

For the record, the 14th Amendment's equal protection clause states: "No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws." That would seem to include protection against exactly the kind of discrimination to which Scalia referred.

Read the rest of this shocking story in The Huffington Post.

UPDATE:  Scalia says the 14th Amendment protects only black citizens, not women. Oh, and a rich white kid named Bush

For another view on the matter, please read this piece by Joan Walsh from Salon.

Japanese Crossdressers Niche Shopping Site

Now that I have finally gotten rid of the visions of sugarplums dancing in my head, I have been trying to catch up on my trans-net reading.

During my catch-up, I came across this December 16 Japan Trends story about an e-commerce store that is an offshoot of the crossdresser maid cafes. For those who are unfamiliar with crossdresser maid cafes, they are restaurants where the waitstaff dress as maids and also happen to be male.

The e-commerce store, Lagrangel, sells a variety of feminine finery (including wigs) for Japanese lads who wish to present as ladies. Too bad their size large is about 6 inches too small for me!

To Do

In lieu of New Year's resolutions, I prefer to assemble a to-do list for the coming year. So for 2011, here are my to-dos (in no particular order):

• Dress en femme more often than not

• Kiss a girl

• Lose ten pounds

• Write a book

• Get rid of my back fat

• Have more nights out with the girls

• Get rid of my varicose veins

• Improve my blog

• Find a new hair style

• Attend a transgender conference

• Sell Avon en femme

Happy New Year!

Another Good Reason For Giving Up Smoking

It was twenty years ago today

Stana, December 1990

Wednesday in Heels

"Angelina Jolie had her own request for stunt gear in the new movie "The Tourist" -- stilettos," according to the Associated Press.

"Jolie did her stunts in Salvatore Ferragamo heels. The heel height came down a bit for the most active scenes, but "she basically toughed it out in her shoes," said costume designer Colleen Atwood."

Read the rest of the story here.

Meanwhile, if you ever bought a pair of heels that turned out to be too small (who hasn't?), here is a cool tip I found on YouTube that demonstrates how to stretch your shoes a half to one full size using ice.

Dunno what my spouse will think finding a pair of 4-inch pumps next to the pot roast, but if it works, move over tater tots!

Femulate Brasil

Femulate Brasil emulates Femulate in Portuguese.

César is the brains behind Femulate Brasil and I thank him for honoring my blog with his Portuguese version.

Support the "Girls"

An e-mail from Jackie alerted me that the boys who emulated girls in a pageant at the Ernest Ward Middle School in Walnut Hill, FL, were receiving flak from some of the folks commenting on the news story about the event.

Seems that the boys put the event together as a fundraiser for the school's cheerleaders, but some "enlightened" individuals found the crossdressing inappropriate and harangued the boys with their comments.

Jackie and I agree that the boys do not deserve the negative comments. Rather, they should be congratulated for their fine work. If you would like to add some positive words to those comments, I urge you to do so here.

Boys Being Girls Again

Bill e-mailed me about womanless beauty pageants at the Travelers Rest High School in Travelers Rest, SC. You can view photos of the 2008 pageant here and the 2009 pageant here.

Bill opines that "2008 is much better than 2009" and that "pierced earrings and high heels are worn in this event."

"Some application of Nair would have improved matters," says I.

More or Less Womanless

I received an unsolicited e-mail a few days ago that invited me to visit a web site to view videos related to womanless pageants, weddings, fashion shows, etc. I checked it out and found a list of approximately 300 links to such videos. Many I had seen in the past, but some were new to me.

I was going to pass the web site along to you readers, then I discovered that there was a "catch." If I was not careful about where I pointed and clicked, the womanless video list transitioned into a pornography video list. So I abandoned the idea of passing along the web site information to you.

Instead, I Googled it myself. Doing so, I came up with 692 womanless-related videos. Like the porn site list, some I have seen in the past, but some were new to me.

You'll have to separate the wheat from the chaff yourself. Enjoy!

Merry Christmas to You and Yours

Another Tall Thursday

Long time, no Famous Females of Height, so without further ado…

My trans sister in Atlanta, Petra, alerted me to the tallest female of this group, 6'8" Ricki Covette, a burlesque performer from the 1960s. Petra kindly sent along a pertinent link about Miss Covette, too.

I have been watching Seinfeld reruns lately and I spotted three of our tall ladies on that show: 5'8" Cindy Ambuehl, 5'9" Kathleen McClellan, and 5'9" Ivana Miličević.

Also spotted while ogling the telly were 5'9" model Sophie Turner, 5'10" actress Margo Stilley (spotted in the film How To Lose Friends & Alienate People - that's her in the accompanying photo), and 6'3" actress Dot-Marie Jones from television's Glee.

Meanwhile, Back at T-Central…

At last count, my guest post at Calie’s T-Central has generated a thread of 20 25 interesting comments. If you have not read the comments, I recommend that you do. You might also want to add your own comment to the discussion.

Vampire Girls

Looking for femulations on eBay, I came across an unusual postcard depicting a vaudeville act called “Vampire Girls Company.” The “girls” are actually boys and according to the postcard, they were performing at the “New Garden Theatre.”

The back of the postcard indicates that Waterloo, IA was the site of photo on the front of the postcard. I can find no other information concerning the Vampire Girls.   

Go Directly to T-Central…

…do not pass go and do not collect $200.

Sister blogger, Calie, the brains behind the operation known as T-Central, invited me to guest post on her blog. I was honored that she asked me and I happily accepted her invitation. My guest post now appears there.

By the way, I am getting over my illness. Today, I feel about 80%  “normal,” as compared to 50% yesterday and 0% on Sunday. Thank you all for your well wishes!

Ill

I'm ill.

I woke up in the middle of the night and had vomiting sessions at 2, 3 and 5 AM losing 5 pounds in the process.

I got out of bed at 8 AM to take a shower figuring that after a shower, I would feel better. I did not. Instead, I felt very weak and tired, so I went back to bed and slept most of the morning.

I woke up around noon with a 100.3 degree temp; took an ibuprofen and that brought my temp down to 99.

I felt blah all afternoon and am going back to bed after I post this.

Sorry, I am not my femulating self today. I hope tomorrow that I will be better.

Next Stop... Victoria's Secret

The Switchers

Dear Stana: Where’d You Get the Bunny Costume?

Dear Stana,

I like your site and check it often. On your site's picture gallery, there are many pics of you, but I wanted to ask about one toward the bottom where you are dressed in what looks like a black waitress outfit from a Playboy Club. You look absolutely fabulous. It must feel wonderful. I was wondering about it though; where you got it; if it is from a Playboy club?

Regards,

Fred

Hi Fred,

Thank you for the kind words!

Like every boy, I wanted to be a Playboy bunny when I grew up. Didn't happen, but the next best thing was to be a Playboy bunny on Halloween.

Halloween 2004 was my target for joining the girls in Hef's bunny hutch, so I began searching the Internet for bunny costumes.

Occasionally, authentic Playboy bunny costumes turn up on eBay, but they are prohibitively expensive, not to mention that they are never available in Size 16 Tall.

There were a few bunny costumes available on the Halloween costume web sites. All resembled the real Playboy costume in one way or another, but none were authentic enough for me and again, size was an issue.

I am a do-it-yourself kind of girl. In the past, I assembled many Halloween costumes from scratch, so I decided that if I wanted to achieve authenticity, I would have to build my own Playboy bunny costume.

With summer winding down, there were clearance sales galore on swimwear and I found the perfect item for my costume at the Newport-News web site: a black sequins maillot-style swimsuit. I don't recall the size or the price, but when it arrived, it was a perfect fit and I was well on my way building the costume.

I already had shoes that matched the bodice: a pair of black patent high heel pumps.

The bunny ears, tail, tuxedo cuffs and collar with bow tie were relatively easy and inexpensive to acquire. Various Halloween costumers sold kits that paired the ears with the tail and the cuffs with the collar. They were so inexpensive that I bought two kits each just in case I had a costume malfunction.

The hardest items to find were the fishnets and rosette name badge.

I owned fishnets, but none that had a fishnet pattern all the way up to the waistband, which is what I needed to cover my legs from toe to hip. One more time, size was an issue, but I finally managed to find a pair online that fit my very long gams.

After visiting a number of craft and party stores, I found a rosette name badge at a local party store. All I had to do was add my own name to the badge, which I did using a font on my computer that approximated the original bunny rosette name badge font.

I had a collection of foundation garments to experiment with in order to achieve a bunny-like figure while attempting to keep the foundation garments hidden. After considerable experimentation, I went with a corset-style waist cincher to achieve the narrowest waistline and a legless panty girdle to flatten my tummy.

I went bra-less since the swimsuit had a built-in bra. I inserted my largest homemade birdseed falsies in the cups of the swimsuit and used surgical tape to bring my "girls" together to add some cleavage.

Voila! I was a now a Playboy bunny and my costume was a hit at my support group's Halloween party that year.

I am very proud of that costume and I hope I will have the opportunity to wear it again someday real soon now.

Best Wishes,

Stana

Need advice concerning femulation or other crossdressing-related matters, then e-mail me and I will happily give you my opinion on the matter. My e-mail address is stana-stana at sbcglobal.net.

Womanless Beauty Pageant

Ernest Ward Middle School in Walnut Hill, FL, held a womanless beauty pageant last night.

It is the best womanless event I’ve seen in awhile. There were a lot of pretty contestants wearing beautiful outfits. In fact, the contestants were so pretty that I was not sure it was really a “womanless” contest when I viewed the first photo (above).

The pageant results appear here and a gallery of photos here.

Dear Stana: Your Gorgeous Wig

Dear Stana,

What is the make and model of your wig. It makes you look wonderfully womanlike.

Thanks,

Patio

Hi Patio,

Thank you for the compliment!

I favor the monofilament wigs from Noriko, specifically the models that are available in gradient dark rooted colors."

Since I began wearing the Noriko brand, I have been told countless times that my wigs look like real hair. Some people were actually shocked when I told them I was wearing a wig.

Besides the excellent quality of Noriko wigs, I believe that the dark roots sell the wig as being authentic hair.

I own a variety of Noriko wigs including their "Stacie" model, which appears in the accompanying photo.

Best Wishes,

Stana

Need advice concerning femulation or other crossdressing-related matters, then e-mail me and I will happily give you my opinion on the matter. My e-mail address is stana-stana at sbcglobal.net.

High Heels Giving You Pain?

High heels are my favorite shoe. I love wearing them (I seldom wear anything else) and I love seeing other women wearing them.

I admit that they may be painful to wear.  (“No pain, no gain,” as they say.)

Some heels are worse than others, but after 8 hours, even the most comfortable pair of heels will take their toll. So I was pleased to find an article by Brooke Siler on The Huffington Post today that describes leg exercises to try if your high heels are giving you pain.

Read all about it here.

Saturday Night Trans

Last night, Paul Rudd hosted Saturday Night Live bra-less. Paul McCartney was the musical guest and performed a Beatles' transgender number, Get Back.

Evolution

Click on the image to make it larger!

More Trans on 30 Rock

Jenna's female impersonator boyfriend Paul (played by Will Forte) appeared on 30 Rock again in last night’s episode. Mid-show, he was in roller skating waitress drag working with other roller skating "waitresses" and later he appeared as a black swan à la Natalie Portman (see photo with Jenna, played by Janet Krakowski, as Lynn Swann).

You can watch the whole episode here until January 7, 2011.

Also, on the 30 Rock web site is a short video titled Mrs. Lutz on Lutz, in which Mrs. Lutz shares all of her son's embarrassing secrets. Her son, J.D. Lutz, is one of the writers on the fictional Saturday Night Live-like television show that 30 Rock documents. Mrs. Lutz is played in drag by the actor, John Lutz, who plays J.D. Lutz (see photo).

Don't Leave Home Without It!

2010: The Year of the Transsexual?

According to this article in today’s New York Times,  “2010 will be remembered as the year of the transsexual.”

“Not since the glam era of the 1970s has gender-bending so saturated the news media. The difference now is that mystery has been replaced with empowerment, even pride.”

Read the rest of the story here.

(Thank you, Sondra, for tipping me off about this article.)

Not to Mention His Candy Kisses

While the Cat's Away

Christmas Shopping

I have been Christmas shopping this past week and I am almost done except for a trip to the packie to buy some wine and liquor.

The thing about Christmas shopping is that I buy almost as much for myself as I do for the people on my shopping list.

Last week, my Woman Within Christmas shopping experience included a top, a bra, and six pairs of tights for myself.

My Sephora shopping order on Friday included mascara, eyeshadow, and powder for myself.

My trip to Fashion Bug yesterday included a six strand silver necklace for myself.

Today, my online visit to Victoria's Secret included two sweater dresses (see photos) for myself.

My excuse is that no one buys Christmas gifts for Stana, so Stana has to take matters into her own hands!

Boys' Dreams

What boy tottering on the edge of the gender chasm could resist this outfit advertised in Macy's Sunday newspaper advertisement?

I know if I saw such an outfit when I was a teenager, I would be ready to get on board the Good Ship Lollipop and sail away to Ladyland.

I didn't do it because I was afraid what other people might think.

I was the first child of my generation and my family had high expectations for me. Back then, I believed that I would be a big disappointment if I ran away to The City, fulfilled my dream, lived full-time as a woman, and became a female impersonator? So I hung back, followed a traditional career path and made everyone proud of me except me.

It took a long time to realize that what other people think about me is not important. My dreams were important and now I so regret not following mine.

Mommy's home watching the Jets' game

Trans Woman Attacked at Kohls in TN

Trans Woman Attacked at Kohls in TN (Warning: Triggery)

Online, the censors are scoring big wins

Online, the censors are scoring big wins

Birds of a Feather Flock Together

Paul's Transvestite Tips

Updated Below

My favorite television show, 30 Rock, is becoming my favorite TV show (if you know what I mean). In last night's episode, Jenna's female impersonator boyfriend Paul (played by Will Forte) made a return appearance and I was amused.

I visited the 30 Rock web site today to look for photos of last night's episode. I found plenty of those.

I also discovered a slideshow of "Paul's Transvestite Tips," which I also found amusing.

My favorite tip is "Feather boas should bring out one's eyes."

UPDATE: You can watch the whole episode here until January 7, 2011.

"Tuesday, I spent the day en femme" again.

Just some additional thoughts on what I wrote here yesterday about my Tuesday out en femme.

All the comments and e-mails I received (so far) on the matter were of the opinion that my outfit looked fine and I had nothing to worry about. Therefore, short hemlines will continue to play an important role in my wardrobe.

At outreach, someone in each class asked me about my sexual orientation. Some students were taken aback (others, not so much) when I indicated that my preference was women and if you accept my how I identify gender-wise, that makes me a lesbian.

Someone in each class also asked me if I presented as a women because I was just interested in all the trappings of being female or was it something more than that, something internal. I explained that it was more than just the trappings of being female. I never felt that I was a female trapped in a male body. Instead, I was "me" trapped in the expectations of what being a "male" was all about.

Although I embraced many things considered "male," I also rejected many "male" things, while embracing many "female" things. As a result, friends and enemies (especially enemies) considered me to be effeminate.

I never tried to be effeminate just as I never tried to be macho, but society branded me "effeminate" nonetheless. I never understood why because I was just being "me."

Yes, I love all the female trappings; I love presenting as a woman, but that's only the tip of the iceberg called "me." 

On a lighter note... My wig continues to impress. A student asked me about my hair and I revealed that it was a wig, which surprised many of the students. I explained that the dark roots of my wig "sells" it and the students agreed with my assessment.

Tuesday, I spent the day en femme.

Tuesday, I spent the day en femme.

I wore my argyle tunic, black ribbed tights, and black mid-calf boots. After I looked in the mirror, I wondered if I was showing too much leg.

"L" and "N" at work wore similar outfits on Monday. "L" wore leggings instead of tights, but they were form-fitting and could be mistaken for tights. So I figured that my tights could be mistaken for leggings, unless the viewer got real close.

Who was I trying to kid?

You had to be myopic not to see that I was wearing tights. The ribbing gave them away. If the tights were a solid color, then mistaking them for form-fitting leggings was in the realm of possibility, but the ribbing was very apparent and to my knowledge, there is no such thing as ribbed leggings.

So why did I go out showing so much leg? Because after I looked in the mirror, I liked the way that I looked!

I was out the door at 9:30 AM.

First, I wanted to see the man with all the toys, so I drove to the mall. I entered through JCPenney and spent about 20 minutes browsing through items in the woman's clothing department.I saw a few items of interest and tried on a couple of jackets, but I discarded each one for different reasons.

While I was in JCPenney, I was very self-conscious about my leggy outfit and I kept looking to see if I was attracting any attention. I noticed none, so I felt more comfortable with my appearance, and walked out into the mall.

At the center of the mall, I found Santa; he was ready for action and I was his first customer. I gave him a break and instead of sitting on his lap, I sat next to him.

While his elves snapped a couple of photos, I told Santa what I wanted for Christmas and he said that if I had been a good girl this year, he would see what he could do.

I chose which photo I thought was the best and the elves printed two copies of my pick (see below) to take home with me.

I exited the mall and drove to a strip of strip malls about ten minutes from the university where I would be doing outreach after noon. I intended to visit Dress Barn, Payless Shoes, Marshalls, and Kohls, but by the time I finished visiting Dress Barn, it was time to drive to the university.

By the way, I tried on five dresses at "the Barn," but bought none. Three were too small and the two that fit looked too big on me.

I arrived at the university and pulled up to the guard house that guarded the parking lot. After I explained why I was visiting the university, the guard said, "Park anywhere that is not reserved, Ma'am."

"Thank you, sir."

I parked the car, walked to class, and on the way, a group of guys ogled me as I walked by.

"Thank you, guys."

At the classroom, I met up with three other transgenders and the spouse of one. I had done outreach with all of them on many other occasions.

The two Human Sexuality classes had approximately 30 students each with females outnumbering males by about a 4-to-1.

The routine is that each of us spends about three to five minutes each telling our life stories in a nutshell. Then the students ask questions.

We hear many of the questions (like "How did you choose your female name?") over and over again at each outreach, but there are always a few unique questions that require some thought to answer.

Yesterday, the students were very enthusiastic, had a lot good questions; so many so that we ran out of time before they had a chance to ask them all.

After the class, we read the students' reactions to our presentations. Yesterday, I lost count of the number of reactions that admitted that before our presentations, the students thought that all transgenders were gay and now they learned that that legend is not true. Another common thread was that some of the students were apprehensive about our appearance, but afterwords, they felt very comfortable with us.

After the classes, I called it a day. I had not slept well the night before and I was exhausted, so I drove home and went to bed early. But before I fell asleep, I reflected on another fun and productive day out en femme and began looking forward to the next opportunity to be me.

'Tis the Season

Besides myself, there are two other female fashionistas here at work.

Everyday, I check to see what they are wearing and on Monday, they showed up similarly attired.

"N" wore a rust-colored sweater dress or tunic, black tights, and black mid-calf boots.

"L" wore a red sweater dress or tunic, black leggings, and black booties.

(I wrote "sweater dress or tunic" because their sweater dresses were short enough to be considered "tunics" or their tunics were long enough to be considered "dresses.")

Anyway, guess what I was planning to wear on my day out en femme on Tuesday?

A purple tunic, black tights or leggings, and black mid-calf boots.

Monday Randomness

This blog's popularity still amazes me. These days, it averages about 4,400 hits per day. At that rate, the hit counter should pass 1.5 million sometime today.

As a result of the blog's popularity, I get a lot of e-mail. I try to answer each e-mail as soon as possible, but sometimes I cannot; the mail piles up and I get a little behind, but I still manage to answer most in a day or two. I apologize if I do not answer your e-mail fast enough, but I am doing the best that I can.

In a clip for Oprah's show today, she expresses excitement that her guest, Keith Urban, has been clean for four years. Hey, Oprah, I've been clean for 59 years; when am I going to be on your show?

I'm looking forward to Tuesday. A bad day out en femme is better than a good day of fishing

Just wondering if Sarah Palin can see North Korea from her backyard?

Speaking of facelifts, here are ten reasons why you should get a dog instead of a facelift.

Stana, 13 November 2010, Hartford

Avoiding a Black and Blue Friday

Thanksgiving is a difficult holiday for girls (male or female) trying to maintain their figures.

I did not want to be blue on "Black Friday," so I refused to get on the bathroom scale on Friday. Saturday morning, I gritted my teeth and climbed on the scale; I was happy to see that I gained only one pound.

It should be a piece of cake to lose that pound in time for my next outing en femme on Tuesday, when I will speak at two human sexuality classes at a local university. I also hope to do some holiday shopping and visit a jolly old elf.

As usual, I am looking forward to doing outreach at the two classes as well as experiencing a day when I will be myself.

Bras for Girls, Bras for Boys, Bras for Everyone

A female acquaintance obtained employment as a salesperson at a local Victoria's Secret store. Her first day on the job was Wednesday and she had one male customer (in boy mode) who wanted to be measured for a bra.

Today will be her second day on the job. I wonder how many boys buying bras for themselves she will encounter today, or was Wednesday's encounter an anomaly.

By the way, her store is the same Victoria's Secret store that I frequent.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Transgender Thanksgiving Trivia

Did you know that Provincetown Harbor is where the Pilgrims initially anchored the Mayflower in 1620 after their ocean voyage from England? (Provincetown is the site of Fantasia Fair, the longest-running transgender event of its kind in the New World.)