Happy Christmas

Have yourself a merry little Christmas!

Love,

Staci

(And here is another photo from my Wednesday evening visit to the Mohegan Sun casino.)

my amazing Amazon evening

Yesterday, I had a spectacular outing en femme.

I was dressed and out the door at 4 PM and drove to Middletown to dine with friends at an upscale restaurant. I was the first to arrive. A waitress seated me at our table and I ordered a mango martini.

My friends arrived a few minutes later: Maryann and Carole, the couple I have done outreach with so many times in the past, Robin and Arline, another couple who I have known for years, and one of my oldest trans friends, Diana.

Surprise! After Diana arrived, she announced that she was buying my dinner (in appreciation for some editing I have done for her recently). Thank-you, Diana.

The dinner and dinner conversation were excellent.

I told everyone that I was undecided about going to the Mohegan Sun casino after dinner. I was a little nervous about going by myself and needed a little encouragement.

Robin provided the encouragement. She has been to the casino numerous times en femme and said that I would have "no problem."

We departed around 7:15 PM and I drove 40 minutes to the casino. I never use valet parking, but it was so cold last night, I did not feel like walking through a damp, cold, and dimly-lit parking garage, so I pulled up to the entrance of the casino, gave the valet my car keys, and sashayed inside. I checked my coat and was ready to have some fun at the "Sun."

I immediately noticed that I was one of the few women in the casino wearing a dress (and a very nice dress at that). As a result, I caught men and women eyeing me at various times during my visit.

You can never be sure if they are looking because you are looking good or because you are looking trans, however, I do know I passed some of the time because while I was walking through the casino shopping mall, a guy who walked by me in the opposite direction remarked to his friends, "Did you see the Amazon?"

Furthermore, I did not hear a discouraging word during my visit. So, on the passing front, it was a very encouraging night.

The casino does not permit photography inside the casino, so I walked through the shopping mall looking for a place to take a photo and looking for someone to take the photo. When I found a photogenic spot, I asked the first friendly-looking woman I saw to take my photo and she happily agreed to do so (the result accompanies this blog posting).

Another reason I was in the mall was to check out the night club and get in some dancing, but the night club was not very busy. I imagine that on a Wednesday nights, the joint is usually not hopping, so I skipped the nightclub.

On the gambling front, I decided to gamble $100, no more, no less. I only play 25-cent slot machines, so I figured that $100 should be more than adequate for my two- or three-hour visit.

Immediately, I won $50, so I played with the casino's money for awhile, but I eventually fed their $50 and my $50 into their machines.

I had made up my mind to leave the casino at 10:30 PM. I was about $20 into my second $50 at about 10:15, when I sat down at what I figured would be the last slot machine of the evening. On my fifth or sixth spin, I won $150. Perfect timing. I collected my winnings, collected my coat and the valet collected my car with me tipping the coat check man and valet generously.

Last night was the first time I ever accessorized with a scarf. The scarf I wore was one of my deceased Mother's scarves; I felt that she was with me throughout the evening and may have brought me some luck at the slot machines. Thank-you, Mom!

Wednesday outing

I am going out en femme Wednesday evening for a holiday dinner at a nice restaurant with some friends from the transworld.

After dinner, I am not sure what I am going to do.

Maybe I will go to Mohegan Sun casino. Do a little gambling, do a little drinking, do a little dancing, and have a lot of fun.

I plan to wear the retro Mad Men-inspired apple green dress that I bought at Dress Barn back in September. (I tried it on this morning and it looks spectacular!)

Needless to say, a full report will follow on Christmas Eve or thereabouts.

something borrowed

Click on the image to enlarge it.

the challenge continues

Tuesday before Thanksgiving, I mentioned how I lost ten pounds since mid-September and I wanted to keep it off, so Thanksgiving would be a challenge for me.

Well, I made it through Thanksgiving and the food- and drink-filled weeks that followed without gaining a pound. I didn't lose anything, but considering all the temptations before me, I think I have been a very good girl maintaining my weight.

The challenge continues through New Year's Day and two weeks from today, I hope to report that the ten pounds I lost are still lost!

another Kodak moment

Click on the image to enlarge it.

tall Bond ladies

A few days ago, I read an article about James Bond films on the Internet and I realized that some of the actresses in the 007 flicks qualify for the Famous Females of Height List. In fact, two tall 007 actresses (Diana Rigg and Famke Janssen) have been on the list for awhile now.

Here are all the tall actresses and the 007 film they appeared in.

5’8” – Carole Bouquet – For Your Eyes Only

5’8” – Claudine Auger – Thunderball

5’8” – Lois Chiles – Moonraker

5’8” – Lois Maxwell – Miss Moneypenny in numerous James Bond films

5’8’ – Shirley Eaton – Goldfinger

5’9” – Diana Rigg (see photo) – On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

5’9” – Maud Adams – Octopussy

6’0” – Famke Janssen – Goldeneye

femulation par excellence

Click on the image to make it big!

what's good for the gander is good for the gosling

Click on the image to enlarge it.

Christmas shopping success

The two dresses I bought for myself as a Christmas present arrived yesterday and they both fit perfectly!

I can recall the days that dresses from Vickie's were never big enough for me. A little downsizing on my part and a little upsizing by Vicky seems to have made a difference.

last night’s dream

I seldom remember my dreams, but when I do remember a dream, it is usually trans-related.

Overnight, I dreamed I was packing to attend a transgender convention. My mother was helping me pack and offered to lend me anything I needed.

Throughout the dream, I kept refusing whatever items she offered because I already had those items in my wardrobe.

Finally, she said with a knowing smile, “I bet you don’t have any of these.”

And with that, she revealed a storage area in the back of her closet that was full of girdles from the 1950s and 1960s.

That got my attention and as I began perusing the girdles to decide what to borrow, I awoke from my dream.

The dream interests me because I never confided in my mother about my crossdressing. I am sure that she knew, but she never brought up the subject.

Almost to her dying day, she often asked me if there was anything I wanted to tell her. At those times, I thought she was just trying to make conversation, but in retrospect, I think she was offering to lend a friendly ear.

I so regret not confiding in my mother. I believe my life would have been different if I knew my mother supported her “daughter.”

make mine Chanel, too

In The Huffington Post, Morane Barkai, suggests unleashing the lady in the corporate suit.

She writes, “The problem arises when women dress like men would dress if they were women. When that happens, even a breathtaking babe can turn into an asexual android on a mission to kill. Somehow, as she zips her skirt, the ovaries take leave, and in the process of buttoning her shirt, a figurative Adam's apple bulges in her throat.”

Read the rest of the story here.

By the way, being a fanatical film fan, I could not help noting Ms. Barkai’s erroneous statement that Meg Ryan appeared in the film Working Girl. Methinks Ms. Barkai confused Ms. Ryan for Melanie Griffith.

'tis the season...

Click on the image to enlarge it.

don’t raise your boy to be macho

In The Huffington Post, Philip Slater’s writes in his piece titled The Cowardice of Machismo, “We live in a world today… in which women are outnumbering men not only in colleges, but in all the professions, because they aren't mentally crippled by the overwhelming irrelevancy of traditional male gender training -- a training that robs those imbued with it of the mental flexibility necessary to deal with the complex world we actually inhabit. Making boys macho today is condemning them to irrelevance.”

Read the rest of the story here.

fitting in

Three years ago, my company was bought out by another company. A reorganization followed, which resulted in my boss (a male) reporting directly to a female about 20 years his junior.

It was no big surprise since my old company was "old school" with very few females in charge, whereas the new company was a relatively new company with many females in charge in various departments.

One month ago, we had a lay-off. My boss was let go. A male and a female co-worker in my department were also let go. A reorganization followed and my new boss is now a female about 20 years my junior. Also they hired back the female co-worker who was let go, but none of the males that were let go.

My profession was a male bastion for ages. Now my department is run by a female and most of my co-workers are female.

When my profession was a male stronghold, the females in my profession tried to fit into the “old boy’s club.” They wore little or no makeup, their hair was in a short style, and they wore tops and slacks – never a skirt or dress. Their only feminine accoutrements were a purse and maybe some stud earrings.

As my profession becomes a female stronghold, maybe I should try to fit in.

Christmas shopping

Christmas time is here again.

I expect to receive gifts from my family, but none of those gifts will be intended for Staci Lana.

I was very good this year and I think I deserve a gift or two with a frill or two. So as I have done in the past, I purchased a couple of gifts for myself today.

There is a dress sale at Vicky's; what more could a boy like me ask for?

I purchased two sweater dresses (pictured here in the colors I ordered) and now I await their delivery.

Merry Christmas to me!

turn off gene and change your sex

Simple technique changes sex of a mouse – and reveals the gender war that rages in all of us

One of the great dogmas of biology is that gender is fixed from birth, determined by the inheritance of certain genes on the X and Y sex chromosomes. But this simplistic idea has been exploded by the latest study, which demonstrated that fully-developed adult females can undergo a partial sex change following a genetic modification to a single gene.

Read the rest of the story today's edition of The Independent.

(Thank you, Gwen, for alerting me to this article.)

eschew boxes

Click on the image to enlarge it.

G.I. Joe en femme

Click on the image to enlarge it.

transgender regret

Joanne Herman, transgender advocate, transwoman, and author of Transgender Explained For Those Who Are Not, wrote an interesting piece about transgender regret on The Huffington Post.

"Many will have regrets about the consequences of their transition, but few will regret the transition itself. In the unusual case where the consequences were overwhelming enough to prompt a de-transition, the return to the old gender is seldom satisfactory either."

Read the rest of the article here.

a picture is worth a thousand words

At 5' 11", Lily Cole is already on my Famous Females of Height list, but after seeing her photo (right) in today's The Huffington Post standing next to Terry Gilliam at a film premiere, I feel she deserves another mention in Femulate today.

Venezuelan womanless pageant breaks machismo mold

The Huffington Post had this story about the Miss Fat Gay competition in Venezuela.

"There are a lot of macho types who don't like seeing men in women's clothing," added Alberto Maia, 27, Miss Aragua. "It's not easy for us. Machismo is a disease."

Read the rest of the story and view a video here and here.

“the femulated” and my heroes/heroines

Don’t know if you noticed, but I recently changed the title of the femulated images (in the left frame of this blog) from “He Femulated” to “The Femulated.” That change was in response to a reader who pointed out that some of the femulated people I featured there might not cotton to the pronoun “he.” Thus, I made the change to a more gender neutral title.

Actually, “The Femulated” was the original title of the femulated images, but when I changed the title of the upper image from “Femulate This” to “Femulate Her,” I changed the title of the lower image to “He Femulated” in order to complement the upper title.

Also, if I have a good online reference for the femulated individual, I will include a link to that reference in the individual’s name in the image caption. For example, if you click on the name of today’s “The Femulated” femulator, Grayson Perry, it brings up Wikipedia’s entry for the artist.

my heroes/heroines

Grayson Perry/Claire is one of my heroes/heroines, as is Paul Whitehead/Trisha Van Cleef, who I featured over the weekend in “The Femulated” spot. They are people who femulate and make no bones about it. Although they use femme names when they femulate and have dual identities, they do not have secret identities that they hide behind like I do.

Some days, I seriously consider chucking my secret identity and revealing my dual identity. Then, I come to my senses and reconsider taking that step.

The thing is that lately, the days I consider chucking my secret identity are far outnumbering the days I come to my senses.

I am the kind of person that thinks about doing something, then wakes up one day and just does it letting the pieces fall where they may. Some of those pieces turn out to be insignificant and become non-issues, while those fallen pieces that turn out to be more significant work themselves out eventually.

So, maybe 2010 will be the year that I feature myself in “The Femulated” spot with the caption “<my male name>/Staci Lana Hunter, writer.”

his old hobby was drag racing

Click on the image to enlarge it.

TGIF… really!

I have been a very busy, busy, busy girl this week and I am really glad that Friday is here!

Nicole Wears Staci

Viewing the entertainment news on the web this morning, I see one of the premier members of my Famous Females of  Height list, the 5’11’ Nicole Kidman, appearing at the London opening of her latest film, Nine.

I love her outfit; it is so Staci! (I never met a short pleated skirt I didn’t like.) And her shoes are a delight, too (they are “Hamish” from Nine West).

She looks so lovely!

Tuesday Again

After revisiting yesterday’s post and reading your comments, I have additional thoughts about my day out en femme on Tuesday.

To improve our outreach skills, we read the student’s comments/reactions after each class. They are interesting at a minimum and often reveal things we would never know otherwise, so they are very valuable tools.

I ate up the positive comments about my outfit, as well as the comments that some students were flabbergasted when they learned our birth genders.

I was surprised that some of the students were apprehensive about our visit. They did not say what caused their apprehension, but the good news was that their fears disappeared when they learned that we are real people just like they are.

If they all left with that positive impression, I think we did our job.

Tuesday en femme: the whole story

Morning

I feel so invigorated when I awake on a day I am going out en femme and Tuesday was no different.

I did my makeup and hair and achieved a different look.

I penciled in my eyebrows as I think they should look and then I took a tweezer and removed every hair that was not inside the boundaries I had penciled in. The result was stunning! It was the first time I had truly feminine eyebrows and I wanted to show them off.

Usually, I wear my hair with bangs to cover my less than feminine eyebrows, but yesterday, I parted my hair on one side and swept my bangs aside to reveal my eyebrows.

Cosmetic experts say that you should emphasize your eyes or your lips, but not both. With all the attention on my eyes, I used a pale pink lipstick rather than my usual choice of a red shade.

Overall, I looked different, maybe a little younger and I was very satisfied with my makeup work.

I finished dressing and checked myself out in the mirror. I immediately disliked my gold chainlink necklace and earrings. I don't know if it was their color or what, but they just did not go with my outfit, so I chucked the necklace. Before I hit the road, I chucked the earrings, too. I did not have anything else that was better, so I went without jewelry except for my watch.

I snapped a few photos, grabbed my purse, drove to the mall 15 minutes away, and arrived just as the stores were opening.

Originally, I intended to shop for a coat, but now I had some new shopping ideas.

The dress I was wearing had a neckline that should reveal something besides the flat plains of Kansas. After all, I nearly fill a B cup, so I figured with a little adjustment, some of that B could be revealed. My plan was to visit Victoria's Secret and shop for a bra that could do push-ups.

I walked halfway across the mall to Vickie's. The mall was quiet, mostly store staff and elderly shoppers. No one paid much attention to me except for one gent, who ogled me.

Entering Vickie's, a saleswoman welcomed me and I told her what I wanted. She directed me to Jackie, their bra saleswoman and I told her what I wanted, too. She said she had just what I needed and asked me my bra size.

"38B" was not what she wanted to hear and she explained that the perfect bra for me only came in C cups (and beyond). She suggested trying on a 36C and/or a 38C. I agreed and she fetched one in each size in my color of choice (black), then escorted me to the dressing room.

I removed my dress and bra and tried on the 36C. It was too small and I never even tried to hook it closed. The 38C was a better fit and gave a big boost to my breasts. The flat plains of Kansas gave way to the rolling hills of Southern New England.

Jackie checked me out, adjusted the straps, and proclaimed that it was a perfect fit.

I decided to wear my new bra for the rest of the day, so I put on my dress, exited the dressing room, and immediately was aware of the new topography below my neckline. Wow! I felt like a new woman.

My next shopping goal was to find earrings to go with my outfit. Clip-on earrings are a rare commodity and I was not optimistic.

I tried Claire's and asked the saleswoman if she had any. She showed me the racks containing clip-ons and there were only about 25 pairs in all, but there was one pair that was perfect: a pair of dark gold open disk earrings about 1-1/4-inch in diameter.

I paid for the earrings, exited the store, found a seat in the mall, and put on my purchase, which you can see in the photo above.

I strolled through the mall and perused the dress racks in Macy's and JCPenney's. There were a lot of nice dresses, but only one that I really wanted to buy, but sadly, it was not in my size. So, I left the mall empty-handed albeit with new bling on my ears and new lingerie supporting my breasts.

It was a nice morning at the mall, but the afternoon was coming up fast and it was time to drive to Southern Connecticut State University in New Haven where I would visit two human sexuality classes to do outreach.

Afternoon

Twenty-five minutes later, I parked my car in the university parking lot. I freshened my makeup, then walked to the correct classroom building where I met my fellow presenters, two male-to-female transsexuals, the spouse of one, and a female-to-male transsexual.

I have done outreach with all of them before and we chatted until Professor Anna Schildroth arrived and escorted us to the classroom. (The photo below shows me and Professor Schildroth in the student center between classes.)

As we enter the classroom, I always pay attention to the students' reaction when they first see us. Usually, they try to act cool and not pay any special attention to us, but some sneak peeks at us surreptitiously and a few check us out thoroughly. We usually surprise them because we are not what they expected because we are convincing in our presentations.

Both classes had about 30 students with females in the majority.

We each gave a short description of ourselves.

Mine was different than in the past. I basically reiterated what I wrote in my Whatever Works blog entry , i.e., "I am not a woman trapped in a man's body, I am really a woman. I think as a woman, I emote as a woman, I act as a woman, I speak as a woman, and whenever the opportunity arises, I present as a woman. To most of my acquaintances I am the most womanly male they know and that's because I really am a woman."

No one blinked when I said this.

After our short biographies, the class and presenters split into two groups and each half of the class had an opportunity to ask us all questions. I was teamed with the male-to-female transsexual and her spouse.

A few of the students asked questions, but the majority was silent, so whenever I had an opportunity to answer a question, I went on and on answering it in the hope that something I said would draw them out.

The "how did you arrive at your female name" query came up in each session.

Another repeated question for me was about my nails; the questioners wanted to know what I did about my acrylic nails since I was in boy mode most of the time. Stick-on fake nails was my answer and they usually responded "they look as good as acrylics."

A couple of questions/comments were complimentary. One female student said my hair looked great and wanted the details about my hairdo. A couple of female students loved my shoes and wanted to know where I bought them. Still another complimented me on my fashion sense.

Another female student asked if guys ever hit on me and what do I do if they do. I consider that question very complimentary because the questioner must think I look good enough that a guy might hit on me.

I did receive one question that I never received before: since I stated that I am attracted to women and not men, does that make me a lesbian? I guess so.

By the way, my shoes were comfortable until I developed a blister on the fourth toe of each foot. Even with the blisters, they were still tolerable. In fact, I was unaware of the blisters until I took off my pantyhose at the end of the day.

The class ended at 4:30 PM and I was spent, but it was another great day out en femme.

Tuesday en femme

I am very busy today and do not have time to write about my day out en femme on Tuesday. I promise to write all about it real soon now, but until then, I will leave you with a photo of myself ready to go out yesterday morning.

As they say, “a picture is worth a thousand words.”

completing his trousseau

Click on the image to enlarge it.

Tuesday en femme

Tuesday is a day out en femme for me.

I plan to be dressed and out the door in time to go shopping as soon as the stores open in the morning.

In the afternoon, I will visit two human sexuality classes to do outreach about being trans.

I will probably eat lunch in between classes at the student center and/or I may go out to eat after the second class.

Whatever I do, I will have a full report here for you to read as soon as possible.

What is it that makes a woman?

For his final year degree show at London South Bank University, Lee Slaymaker asks, "What is it that makes a woman? Or for that matter a man? Gender is often argued to be a social construction, free of the constraints of biological sex, with the result being that the term ‘woman’ may just as easily be applied to a feminine male subject as it is to a female one."

For the project, Mr. Slaymaker created three photographic images titled The Woman As Homemaker, The Woman As Sexual Object, and The Woman As Chef (photo above).

In each photo, a male inhabits the feminine role, "thus calling in to question the rigidity of socially accepted notions of the gender binary: not only do these images seek to challenge representations of the feminine gender but also those of the male subject."

To see the entirety of Mr. Slaymaker's project, click here.

new heights

The following statuesque stars join the Femulate Famous Females of Height List:

5' 8" - Lorraine Bracco, (photo right) actress, tv's The Sopranos

5' 8" - Frances Conroy, actress, tv's Six Feet Under

5' 8" - Julia Stiles, actress, the Bourne film trilogy

5' 10" - Natascha McElhone, actress, tv's Californication

5' 11" - Margaret Colin, actress, tv's Gossip Girl

Thank you, Lee, for suggesting the last three ladies.

not quite G.I.

Click on the image to enlarge it.

Happy Thanksgiving

Dolly Parton leading the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in 2007.

It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen. – Dolly Parton

My feelings exactly. – Staci Lana

my reputation preceded me

Last week, I ordered a pair of shoes from Payless ShoeSource.

Via UPS, I tracked my shoes' progress cross-country to my local Payless store and they arrived midday yesterday. I planned to pick up my shoes today during the lunch hour.

At a quarter past high noon, I drove to the store, parked the car, and walked inside. A woman was at the check-out desk paying for two pairs of shoes. As I waited, I jealously admired her black patent high heel pump purchase in size 8.

When she was done, I approached the check-out desk and the sales rep looked at me and spoke my male name while reaching under the desk to fetch my shoes. I was in boy mode, so using my male name was appropriate, but how did she know I was the person collecting the online shoe order?

I have seen that sales rep in the store a number of times. I believe I purchased women's shoes from her while I was in boy mode on at least one occasion, so maybe she remembered me when she saw my name on the order.

I imagine I am memorable; how many males come into the store, admit they "do drag," and proceed to try on all the woman's shoes in size 11? Not many, I imagine.

The store is on the way to university where I will be doing outreach on Tuesday, so if I have time, maybe I will stop in and let her see how I look wearing the shoes en femme.

By the way, the shoes are very nice and very comfortable. I tried them on when I arrived home and wore them for about a half hour without any foot issues.

younger eyes

I am an Avon lady, so I am very familiar with their products and use some of them regularly.

Avon has just introduced a new product to correct crow’s feet. Their product blurb reads:

The first 2-in-1 treatment to resurface & visibly fill crow's feet… at home. Professional crow’s feet laser treatments can be painful and costly (up to $2000 per treatment). ANEW CLINICAL Crow’s Feet Corrector is a specialized eye treatment system uniquely formulated to smooth out and fill in lines around the delicate eye area — no doctors, no lasers. IN JUST 3 DAYS crow's feet lines look plumped out and leveled. OVER TIME 100% of women showed a reduction in the length, depth and number of crow's feet wrinkles.

Girls my age have crow’s feet, so I was very interested and ordered the product for myself.

After using the crow’s feet corrector for less than two weeks, I have noticed an improvement. My crow’s feet were not that bad, so I did not notice much of a difference in that area, but I did notice a big improvement regarding the wrinkles under my eyes. The corrector removed all the wrinkles and now I have smooth skin under my eyes. So, I can definitely recommend this product with one caveat.

The resurfacer applicator (step 1 of the 2-step process) can clog. If you squeeze too hard trying to unclog the applicator, you may release more of the product than you can use at one time (like I did). To work around this problem, run the applicator under hot water to unclog the clog.

the challenge

I love Thanksgiving for all the following reasons:

• A guaranteed four-day weekend every year
  
• The food
  
• Big balloons bumping down Broadway
  
• The food
  
• The Rockettes*
  
• The food
  
• Sleeping in late on Black Friday
  
• The leftovers
  
• Did I mention the food?

That being said,  I lost ten pounds since mid-September and I want to keep it off, so Thanksgiving will be a challenge for me. Wish me luck!

* Going to New York City the past two years to see Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in person, I sadly discovered that The Radio City Rockettes are not in the parade! They only appear at the end of the parade in front of Macy’s storefront for the television audience.

thanks

We celebrate Thanksgiving Day on Thursday.

"Traditionally, it is a time to give thanks for the harvest and express gratitude in general," according to Wikipedia.

No harvest here, so I guess I express “gratitude in general.”

Mother and Father are deceased, but I know that they are around in a spirit-in-the-sky kind of way, so I want to thank them for raising a beautiful daughter and not interfering with my feminine ways when I was growing up.

Maybe they could have been a little more encouraging by buying me some dresses to wear around the house (so I wouldn’t have to borrow my sister’s) and buying me some dolls of my very own (so I wouldn’t have to borrow my sister’s). It probably would have made my sister happy, too; I wouldn’t be borrowing her stuff and she would have had a sister to play with.

On the other hand, it could have been a lot worse and they could have forced me to be masculine!

So, thank you Mom and Pop for letting me be me.

600 K and counting

Yay... the Femulate hit counter passed the 600,000 mark today!

Thank you all for visiting my blog.

kismet

(updated below)

I like the sweater dress. They cling to my curves and look good on me, so I am always on the outlook for a new sweater dress to add to my wardrobe.

The front page of Kohl's advertisement in today's newspaper features a cute sweater dress, which reminded me that I have $20 credit at Kohl's and a $10 off coupon.

Kismet!

I will definitely visit Kohl's later this week.

Update:

On the day before Thanksgiving, I went to the local Kohl's store and could not find the sweater dresses.

C'est la vie.

transgender awareness: celebrate the living

Helen Boyd celebrates the living transgenders in her blog today.

these days

Today is Transgender Day of Remembrance. Honor the dead, who have gone before us struggling to find a place in society as a trans-person. But do not forget to celebrate the living, who continue to fight the good fight.

Thursday, I will not be going to NYC to view the Thanksgiving day parade. I went two years ago and it was great, so I went again last year, and it was not as great.

I will probably go again, maybe next year or maybe next next year, but this year, I will watch it on television.

Anyway, in honor of the Thanksgiving day parade, my "Femulate Her" models for the next week will be exclusively from Macy's, the folks responsible for the parade.

Tuesday after Thanksgiving (December 1) is my next day out en femme.

I plan to be dressed to kill in time to be at the mall when it opens to shop for a new winter coat and whatever else strikes my fancy.

After shopping, I will drive to New Haven to do outreach at a pair of human sexuality classes at the state university. One class begins during the noon hour and the other class begins in the mid-afternoon, so during the break, I will have a late light lunch at the student center and chat with the professor and other outreach presenters.

I enjoy doing outreach. Typically, there are three or four other presenters: a mixed bag of post-op, pre-op, no-op, male-to-female or female-to-male transsexuals. We each spend five to ten minutes telling the class who we are (our mini-biographies), then the class asks questions.

I have been doing outreach for 3-1/2 years, so many of the questions I encounter are questions I have heard before, but there are always a few questions that are unique and sometimes so unexpected that they force me to think hard about my answer. Those questions are worth the price of admission.

After outreach, I may call it a day or I may have an early dinner if any of the other presenters are interested in dining with me.

Staci buys new shoes

I needed a pair of brown shoes to go with some earth tone dresses I bought recently.

I checked a few online shoe stores, but nothing caught my eye until I visited Payless ShoeSource and perused their new arrivals. There I found the pictured slingback platform shoe.

Its description reads, “Show off your wild side with this exotic slingback. It features a snake-print patent upper, pretty peep toe, adjustable slingback for a good fit, a padded insole for comfort and a sultry 4" wrapped heel with 1/2" platform. Manmade materials.”

They had my size in stock, so I ordered a pair for $24.99 with free shipping to my local Payless brick and mortar store.

Saturday night photos and Windows Live Writer

CDJanie started using Windows Live Writer to compose posts on her blog.

I was impressed with its image-handling capabilities, so I could not resist trying out the software myself. Downloaded, installed, up and running, I am using Windows Live Writer to compose this post.

To test out its image handling prowess, I have inserted and manipulated two more photos of me from Saturday night.

The software offers some cool imaging options. So I added drop shadows and tilted the photos. That was easy!

Why Men Are Becoming More Like Women

Marcus Buckingham writes in The Huffington Post today:

In its recent special on the State of Women, Time magazine announced that the gender wars were over and declared a tie. "It's no longer a man's world," Time concluded. "Nor is it a woman's nation. It's a cooperative, with bylaws under constant negotiation, and expectations that profits be equally shared."

I'm not so sure. In a war, no matter the outcome of a certain skirmish or battle, the winner is the party whose attitudes, behaviors and preoccupations come to dominate the postwar landscape. By this measure, the outcome of the gender wars, if wars they were, is clear: women won.

Read the rest of the story here.

femulating in the shoe department

Femulators tend to have bigger feet than the females they are femulating. Those of us in double-digit women's sizes discover quickly that the selection of shoes is limited.

Recently, I checked every store in a local mall and only found two stores that carried women's shoes in sizes larger than 10: Payless and Sears.

I had better luck online and here are the stores I found that have larger sizes in women's shoes:

BarefootTess.com: up to size 12 15

DesignerShoes.com: up to size 15

dreamshoes: up to size 16

DSW Shoe Warehouse: their search engine goes up to size 15, but it found no women's shoes in sizes 15 or 14 and only sneakers in size 13. The selection started improving at size 12 and smaller.

Endless: up to size 16

Gwyneth Shoes: up to size 15

outletbuy.com: up to size 17.5

Payless ShoeSource: up to size 13; I have bought a lot of shoes from Payless (online and in store) and some of my purchases are the most comfortable shoes I own.

Zappos: up to size 16; I have made two purchases from Zappos and have no complaints. They are fast and they pick up the tab for shipping in both directions!

(Thank you Paula for a correction and an addition.)

Candy... not so dandy?

Candy is a new fashion magazine "completely dedicated to celebrating transvestism, transexuality, cross dressing and androgyny, in all its manifestations."

The first issue is a limited edition print run of 1000 copies, so I doubt if I will have an opportunity to see the magazine, but here is the contents of its first issue (the Fall/Winter 2009/2010 issue):

"Candy Darling" by Kimball Hastings and Bruce Weber
"Lypsinka, Andre J and Joey Arias" by Bruce Weber
"Smart Style" by Tim Walker
"Tribute to Nico" by Benjamin Alexander Huseby
"Bianca Exotica" by Marcelo Krasilcic and Antonio Frajado
"Rodarte" by David Armstrong
"La Crawford" by Popy Blasco and Daniel Riera
"Kim Ann Foxmann" by Silvia Prada and Daniel Riera
"Casa Susanna" by Dean Mayo Davies
"Tribute to Casa Susanna" by Brett Lloyd and Kim Jones
"Johnny Depp style" by Kira Bunse and Jos van Heel
"Angel Marlowe" by Ariadna Pedret and Terry Richardson
"Christian Lacroix" by Karim Sadli and Robbie Spencer

It's just a list of the contents, so it is hard to tell what the list really represents, but the list itself does not seem very exciting or groundbreaking. Candy Darling, Nico, Casa Susanna? Yes, those are trans fashion icons, but they are ancient history.

And what's with the limited 1000 copy print run?

And worse, what's with the biannual publication schedule?

Nice cover, but I just dunno if this magazine will be successful.

celebrate the living

This is Transgender Awareness Week.

Except for a transgender day of remembrance gathering in Hartford, I am not aware of any other local transgender awareness events. Circumstances at work prevent me from attending that gathering, so what can I do?

Maybe I did my part on Saturday night when I attended a fund raiser en femme. I encountered a lot of civilians at the Hartford Hilton and I am sure some/most/all of them were aware that I was trans-something or other. I hope I left them with a favorable impression.

In my opinion, I don't think that day of remembrance gatherings do much good promoting awareness of the trans-community. I am all in favor of honoring those who were killed because they did not conform to society's expectations gender-wise, but these gatherings get little or no publicity outside the GLBT community. And if any these gatherings do get publicity beyond the GLBT community, the general public does not care much because they perceive it as just another death of a social misfit.

To better achieve transgender awareness, we should celebrate the living. The public would be more impressed with stories about living trans-people and their contributions to society. Being a dead trans-person is not very interesting, but being a living trans-person and all that entails is very interesting (I can attest to that).

Our stories can enlighten the general public and make them aware that we are out there everywhere everyday trying to live our lives day-to-day just like they try to do.

my dream log

I have been documenting all my trans-related dreams here and this is a new entry.

Sunday morning, I dreamed I came home from work and looked in the mirror to discover that there were very obvious traces of makeup on my face (smudged red lipstick and black eye makeup). I assume that the makeup was from an outing en femme the day before.

That is all I remember.

last night

I am not in any pain, but I can feel my calf muscles when I walk today, which is a pleasant reminder that I danced the night away in four-inch heels.

My feet feel fine, but it probably would have been different if I had not made a fashion adjustment before leaving to go out last night to attend One Big Event, the annual fund-raiser for the Hartford Gay and Lesbian Health Collective.

I originally planned to wear a pair of strappy sandals. My toes suffered dearly the one time I wore them out a few years ago, so I stretched the toe straps all week long. It did not help.

After wearing them for a half hour before departing last night, my toes were hurting. I took the sandals off and a purple welt was developing near the base of my big toe on my right foot, so I decided to find a different pair of shoes to wear.

I chose my new sling-back open-toe black patent pumps with a four-inch heel that I bought at Payless last month and it was a wise choice. They were comfortable the entire evening and they were nice looking, too.

(The photo above shows me before and after the fashion adjustment.)

I arrived at the Hartford Hilton at 6PM, found the banquet hall and checked in. There were about 300 people in attendance. Males dominated the attendees at about a 5 to 1 ratio. There were about ten trans girls in attendance and most of us sat at the same table with our SOs and allies.

Everyone was dressed to kill. Some women wore evening gowns, but the majority wore dresses in various styles, so I did not feel at all out of place in my cocktail dress.

Except for my trans friends and the couple whose wedding I attended in September, I knew no one else in attendance, so I mingled with the people I knew and people-watched the people I did not know.

I noticed that I was the object of others who were people-watching; that could be a good thing or a bad thing. No one laughed at me or gave me a dirty look, so maybe it was mostly a good thing.

Robin, who convinced me to attend the event, took the nice photo (right) of me seated at our table, where we had salad, a chicken dinner, and dessert. It was the first time I ever had a cupcake for dessert at this sort of event; it was very tasty.

After dining, there was an auction (to which I paid no attention), a comedian, who was amusing, but not laugh-out-loud funny (in my opinion), and then the music began with a great live band. I danced about 1 out of 3 songs, not because I did not want to dance, but because I lacked a partner. Near the end, I just danced with a group of trans girls and had a great time.

During one dance, the event photographer made a special effort to shoot photos of me dancing. I will have to watch the Health Collective's web site for photos.

I had a wonderful time last night and felt very pleased with myself. Did I forget to mention that when I got on the scale yesterday morning, I discovered that I had lost ten pounds during the past two months? I was very pleased indeed.

tonight

I am all dolled up and ready to attend a semi-formal/formal tonight.

The advertisement for the event reads "Formal Attire Encouraged," while a past attendee informed me that it is really a "semi-formal" event, yet all the photos I've seen of the event show women in long formal gowns.

No matter, I am wearing a darling, knee-length sleeveless black A-line cocktail dress with goldtone beading along its wide neckline. Black strappy sandals with 4-inch stiletto heels adorn my feet, a gold bracelet graces my wrist, and gold chandelier earrings hang from my earlobes. A gold sequins purse and a black sheer scarf with gold decor complete my ensemble.

The majority of attendees will be civilians with only a handful of trans-people, so I am looking forward to another new experience en femme.

I promise a full report and photos soon.

vintage femulators

As a child of the 1950s, female fashions of the late '50s and early '60s left a big impression on my developing psyche. As a result, today I favor fashions that recall the styles of that era. I actually own some vintage clothing and have worn some of those items out en femme.

In addition to wearing retro and vintage clothing, I also like to view images of how femulators of that era dressed. The book Casa Susanna is a favorite source for viewing such images.

The book contains a collection of snapshots (like the one to the right) taken during the late '50s and early '60s at a safe house in upstate New York, where femulators met to dress and socialize en femme. Images from Casa Susanna appear on the Internet; a quick Google search will reveal a representative selection of those images.

Another source of images of femulators from that bygone era are periodicals. I have seen sample pages from a variety of femulator magazines on the Internet, but I do not own any because they are not easy to the find and are too pricey when I find them.

However, a publisher has recently been "reprinting" vintage periodicals and books from that era in Adobe .pdf format including long gone back issues of Female Mimics at prices that are a bargain when compared to the prices of vintage copies.

I have purchased all of their Female Mimics offerings and I am very pleased with the purchases. And making a purchase could not be easier: you order online, pay online, and a few minutes later, you download your purchase.

So, you go retro, girl!