Tuesday, December 15, 2009

'tis the season...

Click on the image to enlarge it.

don’t raise your boy to be macho

boy-playing-with-doll-copy In The Huffington Post, Philip Slater’s writes in his piece titled The Cowardice of Machismo, “We live in a world today… in which women are outnumbering men not only in colleges, but in all the professions, because they aren't mentally crippled by the overwhelming irrelevancy of traditional male gender training -- a training that robs those imbued with it of the mental flexibility necessary to deal with the complex world we actually inhabit. Making boys macho today is condemning them to irrelevance.”

Read the rest of the story here.

Monday, December 14, 2009

fitting in

women_at_work Three years ago, my company was bought out by another company. A reorganization followed, which resulted in my boss (a male) reporting directly to a female about 20 years his junior.

It was no big surprise since my old company was "old school" with very few females in charge, whereas the new company was a relatively new company with many females in charge in various departments.

One month ago, we had a lay-off. My boss was let go. A male and a female co-worker in my department were also let go. A reorganization followed and my new boss is now a female about 20 years my junior. Also they hired back the female co-worker who was let go, but none of the males that were let go.

My profession was a male bastion for ages. Now my department is run by a female and most of my co-workers are female.

When my profession was a male stronghold, the females in my profession tried to fit into the “old boy’s club.” They wore little or no makeup, their hair was in a short style, and they wore tops and slacks – never a skirt or dress. Their only feminine accoutrements were a purse and maybe some stud earrings.

As my profession becomes a female stronghold, maybe I should try to fit in.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Christmas shopping

Christmas time is here again.

I expect to receive gifts from my family, but none of those gifts will be intended for Staci Lana.

I was very good this year and I think I deserve a gift or two with a frill or two. So as I have done in the past, I purchased a couple of gifts for myself today.

There is a dress sale at Vicky's; what more could a boy like me ask for?

I purchased two sweater dresses (pictured here in the colors I ordered) and now I await their delivery.

Merry Christmas to me!

Friday, December 11, 2009

turn off gene and change your sex

Simple technique changes sex of a mouse – and reveals the gender war that rages in all of us

One of the great dogmas of biology is that gender is fixed from birth, determined by the inheritance of certain genes on the X and Y sex chromosomes. But this simplistic idea has been exploded by the latest study, which demonstrated that fully-developed adult females can undergo a partial sex change following a genetic modification to a single gene.

Read the rest of the story today's edition of The Independent.

(Thank you, Gwen, for alerting me to this article.)

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

transgender regret

Joanne Herman, transgender advocate, transwoman, and author of Transgender Explained For Those Who Are Not, wrote an interesting piece about transgender regret on The Huffington Post.

"Many will have regrets about the consequences of their transition, but few will regret the transition itself. In the unusual case where the consequences were overwhelming enough to prompt a de-transition, the return to the old gender is seldom satisfactory either."

Read the rest of the article here.

a picture is worth a thousand words

At 5' 11", Lily Cole is already on my Famous Females of Height list, but after seeing her photo (right) in today's The Huffington Post standing next to Terry Gilliam at a film premiere, I feel she deserves another mention in Femulate today.

Venezuelan womanless pageant breaks machismo mold

The Huffington Post had this story about the Miss Fat Gay competition in Venezuela.

"There are a lot of macho types who don't like seeing men in women's clothing," added Alberto Maia, 27, Miss Aragua. "It's not easy for us. Machismo is a disease."

Read the rest of the story and view a video here and here.

Monday, December 7, 2009

“the femulated” and my heroes/heroines

Don’t know if you noticed, but I recently changed the title of the femulated images (in the left frame of this blog) from “He Femulated” to “The Femulated.” That change was in response to a reader who pointed out that some of the femulated people I featured there might not cotton to the pronoun “he.” Thus, I made the change to a more gender neutral title.

Actually, “The Femulated” was the original title of the femulated images, but when I changed the title of the upper image from “Femulate This” to “Femulate Her,” I changed the title of the lower image to “He Femulated” in order to complement the upper title.

Also, if I have a good online reference for the femulated individual, I will include a link to that reference in the individual’s name in the image caption. For example, if you click on the name of today’s “The Femulated” femulator, Grayson Perry, it brings up Wikipedia’s entry for the artist.

writer091207 my heroes/heroines

Grayson Perry/Claire is one of my heroes/heroines, as is Paul Whitehead/Trisha Van Cleef, who I featured over the weekend in “The Femulated” spot. They are people who femulate and make no bones about it. Although they use femme names when they femulate and have dual identities, they do not have secret identities that they hide behind like I do.

Some days, I seriously consider chucking my secret identity and revealing my dual identity. Then, I come to my senses and reconsider taking that step.

The thing is that lately, the days I consider chucking my secret identity are far outnumbering the days I come to my senses.

I am the kind of person that thinks about doing something, then wakes up one day and just does it letting the pieces fall where they may. Some of those pieces turn out to be insignificant and become non-issues, while those fallen pieces that turn out to be more significant work themselves out eventually.

So, maybe 2010 will be the year that I feature myself in “The Femulated” spot with the caption “<my male name>/Staci Lana Hunter, writer.”

Friday, December 4, 2009

TGIF… really!

I have been a very busy, busy, busy girl this week and I am really glad that Friday is here!

kidman-nine-london-4

Nicole Wears Staci

Viewing the entertainment news on the web this morning, I see one of the premier members of my Famous Females of  Height list, the 5’11’ Nicole Kidman, appearing at the London opening of her latest film, Nine.

I love her outfit; it is so Staci! (I never met a short pleated skirt I didn’t like.) And her shoes are a delight, too (they are “Hamish” from Nine West).

She looks so lovely!

Tuesday Again

After revisiting yesterday’s post and reading your comments, I have additional thoughts about my day out en femme on Tuesday.

To improve our outreach skills, we read the student’s comments/reactions after each class. They are interesting at a minimum and often reveal things we would never know otherwise, so they are very valuable tools.

I ate up the positive comments about my outfit, as well as the comments that some students were flabbergasted when they learned our birth genders.

I was surprised that some of the students were apprehensive about our visit. They did not say what caused their apprehension, but the good news was that their fears disappeared when they learned that we are real people just like they are.

If they all left with that positive impression, I think we did our job.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Tuesday en femme: the whole story

Morning

I feel so invigorated when I awake on a day I am going out en femme and Tuesday was no different.

I did my makeup and hair and achieved a different look.

I penciled in my eyebrows as I think they should look and then I took a tweezer and removed every hair that was not inside the boundaries I had penciled in. The result was stunning! It was the first time I had truly feminine eyebrows and I wanted to show them off.

Usually, I wear my hair with bangs to cover my less than feminine eyebrows, but yesterday, I parted my hair on one side and swept my bangs aside to reveal my eyebrows.

Cosmetic experts say that you should emphasize your eyes or your lips, but not both. With all the attention on my eyes, I used a pale pink lipstick rather than my usual choice of a red shade.

Overall, I looked different, maybe a little younger and I was very satisfied with my makeup work.

I finished dressing and checked myself out in the mirror. I immediately disliked my gold chainlink necklace and earrings. I don't know if it was their color or what, but they just did not go with my outfit, so I chucked the necklace. Before I hit the road, I chucked the earrings, too. I did not have anything else that was better, so I went without jewelry except for my watch.

I snapped a few photos, grabbed my purse, drove to the mall 15 minutes away, and arrived just as the stores were opening.

Originally, I intended to shop for a coat, but now I had some new shopping ideas.

The dress I was wearing had a neckline that should reveal something besides the flat plains of Kansas. After all, I nearly fill a B cup, so I figured with a little adjustment, some of that B could be revealed. My plan was to visit Victoria's Secret and shop for a bra that could do push-ups.

I walked halfway across the mall to Vickie's. The mall was quiet, mostly store staff and elderly shoppers. No one paid much attention to me except for one gent, who ogled me.

Entering Vickie's, a saleswoman welcomed me and I told her what I wanted. She directed me to Jackie, their bra saleswoman and I told her what I wanted, too. She said she had just what I needed and asked me my bra size.

"38B" was not what she wanted to hear and she explained that the perfect bra for me only came in C cups (and beyond). She suggested trying on a 36C and/or a 38C. I agreed and she fetched one in each size in my color of choice (black), then escorted me to the dressing room.

I removed my dress and bra and tried on the 36C. It was too small and I never even tried to hook it closed. The 38C was a better fit and gave a big boost to my breasts. The flat plains of Kansas gave way to the rolling hills of Southern New England.

Jackie checked me out, adjusted the straps, and proclaimed that it was a perfect fit.

I decided to wear my new bra for the rest of the day, so I put on my dress, exited the dressing room, and immediately was aware of the new topography below my neckline. Wow! I felt like a new woman.

My next shopping goal was to find earrings to go with my outfit. Clip-on earrings are a rare commodity and I was not optimistic.

I tried Claire's and asked the saleswoman if she had any. She showed me the racks containing clip-ons and there were only about 25 pairs in all, but there was one pair that was perfect: a pair of dark gold open disk earrings about 1-1/4-inch in diameter.

I paid for the earrings, exited the store, found a seat in the mall, and put on my purchase, which you can see in the photo above.

I strolled through the mall and perused the dress racks in Macy's and JCPenney's. There were a lot of nice dresses, but only one that I really wanted to buy, but sadly, it was not in my size. So, I left the mall empty-handed albeit with new bling on my ears and new lingerie supporting my breasts.

It was a nice morning at the mall, but the afternoon was coming up fast and it was time to drive to Southern Connecticut State University in New Haven where I would visit two human sexuality classes to do outreach.

Afternoon

Twenty-five minutes later, I parked my car in the university parking lot. I freshened my makeup, then walked to the correct classroom building where I met my fellow presenters, two male-to-female transsexuals, the spouse of one, and a female-to-male transsexual.

I have done outreach with all of them before and we chatted until Professor Anna Schildroth arrived and escorted us to the classroom. (The photo below shows me and Professor Schildroth in the student center between classes.)

As we enter the classroom, I always pay attention to the students' reaction when they first see us. Usually, they try to act cool and not pay any special attention to us, but some sneak peeks at us surreptitiously and a few check us out thoroughly. We usually surprise them because we are not what they expected because we are convincing in our presentations.

Both classes had about 30 students with females in the majority.

We each gave a short description of ourselves.

Mine was different than in the past. I basically reiterated what I wrote in my Whatever Works blog entry , i.e., "I am not a woman trapped in a man's body, I am really a woman. I think as a woman, I emote as a woman, I act as a woman, I speak as a woman, and whenever the opportunity arises, I present as a woman. To most of my acquaintances I am the most womanly male they know and that's because I really am a woman."

No one blinked when I said this.

After our short biographies, the class and presenters split into two groups and each half of the class had an opportunity to ask us all questions. I was teamed with the male-to-female transsexual and her spouse.

A few of the students asked questions, but the majority was silent, so whenever I had an opportunity to answer a question, I went on and on answering it in the hope that something I said would draw them out.

The "how did you arrive at your female name" query came up in each session.

Another repeated question for me was about my nails; the questioners wanted to know what I did about my acrylic nails since I was in boy mode most of the time. Stick-on fake nails was my answer and they usually responded "they look as good as acrylics."

A couple of questions/comments were complimentary. One female student said my hair looked great and wanted the details about my hairdo. A couple of female students loved my shoes and wanted to know where I bought them. Still another complimented me on my fashion sense.

Another female student asked if guys ever hit on me and what do I do if they do. I consider that question very complimentary because the questioner must think I look good enough that a guy might hit on me.

I did receive one question that I never received before: since I stated that I am attracted to women and not men, does that make me a lesbian? I guess so.

By the way, my shoes were comfortable until I developed a blister on the fourth toe of each foot. Even with the blisters, they were still tolerable. In fact, I was unaware of the blisters until I took off my pantyhose at the end of the day.

The class ended at 4:30 PM and I was spent, but it was another great day out en femme.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Tuesday en femme

20091201 I am very busy today and do not have time to write about my day out en femme on Tuesday. I promise to write all about it real soon now, but until then, I will leave you with a photo of myself ready to go out yesterday morning.

As they say, “a picture is worth a thousand words.”

Monday, November 30, 2009

Tuesday en femme

Untitled-1 Tuesday is a day out en femme for me.

I plan to be dressed and out the door in time to go shopping as soon as the stores open in the morning.

In the afternoon, I will visit two human sexuality classes to do outreach about being trans.

I will probably eat lunch in between classes at the student center and/or I may go out to eat after the second class.

Whatever I do, I will have a full report here for you to read as soon as possible.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

What is it that makes a woman?

For his final year degree show at London South Bank University, Lee Slaymaker asks, "What is it that makes a woman? Or for that matter a man? Gender is often argued to be a social construction, free of the constraints of biological sex, with the result being that the term ‘woman’ may just as easily be applied to a feminine male subject as it is to a female one."

For the project, Mr. Slaymaker created three photographic images titled The Woman As Homemaker, The Woman As Sexual Object, and The Woman As Chef (photo above).

In each photo, a male inhabits the feminine role, "thus calling in to question the rigidity of socially accepted notions of the gender binary: not only do these images seek to challenge representations of the feminine gender but also those of the male subject."

To see the entirety of Mr. Slaymaker's project, click here.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

new heights

The following statuesque stars join the Femulate Famous Females of Height List:

5' 8" - Lorraine Bracco, (photo right) actress, tv's The Sopranos

5' 8" - Frances Conroy, actress, tv's Six Feet Under

5' 8" - Julia Stiles, actress, the Bourne film trilogy

5' 10" - Natascha McElhone, actress, tv's Californication

5' 11" - Margaret Colin, actress, tv's Gossip Girl

Thank you, Lee, for suggesting the last three ladies.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving

dolly_parton_2007_tday_parade

Dolly Parton leading the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in 2007.

It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen. – Dolly Parton

My feelings exactly. – Staci Lana

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

my reputation preceded me

Last week, I ordered a pair of shoes from Payless ShoeSource.

Via UPS, I tracked my shoes' progress cross-country to my local Payless store and they arrived midday yesterday. I planned to pick up my shoes today during the lunch hour.

At a quarter past high noon, I drove to the store, parked the car, and walked inside. A woman was at the check-out desk paying for two pairs of shoes. As I waited, I jealously admired her black patent high heel pump purchase in size 8.

When she was done, I approached the check-out desk and the sales rep looked at me and spoke my male name while reaching under the desk to fetch my shoes. I was in boy mode, so using my male name was appropriate, but how did she know I was the person collecting the online shoe order?

I have seen that sales rep in the store a number of times. I believe I purchased women's shoes from her while I was in boy mode on at least one occasion, so maybe she remembered me when she saw my name on the order.

I imagine I am memorable; how many males come into the store, admit they "do drag," and proceed to try on all the woman's shoes in size 11? Not many, I imagine.

The store is on the way to university where I will be doing outreach on Tuesday, so if I have time, maybe I will stop in and let her see how I look wearing the shoes en femme.

By the way, the shoes are very nice and very comfortable. I tried them on when I arrived home and wore them for about a half hour without any foot issues.

younger eyes

avon_eyes I am an Avon lady, so I am very familiar with their products and use some of them regularly.

Avon has just introduced a new product to correct crow’s feet. Their product blurb reads:

The first 2-in-1 treatment to resurface & visibly fill crow's feet… at home. Professional crow’s feet laser treatments can be painful and costly (up to $2000 per treatment). ANEW CLINICAL Crow’s Feet Corrector is a specialized eye treatment system uniquely formulated to smooth out and fill in lines around the delicate eye area — no doctors, no lasers. IN JUST 3 DAYS crow's feet lines look plumped out and leveled. OVER TIME 100% of women showed a reduction in the length, depth and number of crow's feet wrinkles.

Girls my age have crow’s feet, so I was very interested and ordered the product for myself.

After using the crow’s feet corrector for less than two weeks, I have noticed an improvement. My crow’s feet were not that bad, so I did not notice much of a difference in that area, but I did notice a big improvement regarding the wrinkles under my eyes. The corrector removed all the wrinkles and now I have smooth skin under my eyes. So, I can definitely recommend this product with one caveat.

The resurfacer applicator (step 1 of the 2-step process) can clog. If you squeeze too hard trying to unclog the applicator, you may release more of the product than you can use at one time (like I did). To work around this problem, run the applicator under hot water to unclog the clog.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

the challenge

rockettes

I love Thanksgiving for all the following reasons:

  • A guaranteed four-day weekend every year
  • The food
  • Big balloons bumping down Broadway
  • The food
  • The Rockettes*
  • The food
  • Sleeping in late on Black Friday
  • The leftovers
  • Did I mention the food?

That being said,  I lost ten pounds since mid-September and I want to keep it off, so Thanksgiving will be a challenge for me. Wish me luck!

* Going to New York City the past two years to see Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in person, I sadly discovered that The Radio City Rockettes are not in the parade! They only appear at the end of the parade in front of Macy’s storefront for the television audience.

Monday, November 23, 2009

thanks

We celebrate Thanksgiving Day on Thursday.

"Traditionally, it is a time to give thanks for the harvest and express gratitude in general," according to Wikipedia.

No harvest here, so I guess I express “gratitude in general.”

Mother and Father are deceased, but I know that they are around in a spirit-in-the-sky kind of way, so I want to thank them for raising a beautiful daughter and not interfering with my feminine ways when I was growing up.

Maybe they could have been a little more encouraging by buying me some dresses to wear around the house (so I wouldn’t have to borrow my sister’s) and buying me some dolls of my very own (so I wouldn’t have to borrow my sister’s). It probably would have made my sister happy, too; I wouldn’t be borrowing her stuff and she would have had a sister to play with.

On the other hand, it could have been a lot worse and they could have forced me to be masculine!

So, thank you Mom and Pop for letting me be me.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

600 K and counting

Yay... the Femulate hit counter passed the 600,000 mark today!

Thank you all for visiting my blog.

kismet

(updated below)

I like the sweater dress. They cling to my curves and look good on me, so I am always on the outlook for a new sweater dress to add to my wardrobe.

The front page of Kohl's advertisement in today's newspaper features a cute sweater dress, which reminded me that I have $20 credit at Kohl's and a $10 off coupon.

Kismet!

I will definitely visit Kohl's later this week.

Update:

On the day before Thanksgiving, I went to the local Kohl's store and could not find the sweater dresses.

C'est la vie.

Friday, November 20, 2009

these days

calendar Today is Transgender Day of Remembrance. Honor the dead, who have gone before us struggling to find a place in society as a trans-person. But do not forget to celebrate the living, who continue to fight the good fight.

Thursday, I will not be going to NYC to view the Thanksgiving day parade. I went two years ago and it was great, so I went again last year, and it was not as great.

I will probably go again, maybe next year or maybe next next year, but this year, I will watch it on television.

Anyway, in honor of the Thanksgiving day parade, my "Femulate Her" models for the next week will be exclusively from Macy's, the folks responsible for the parade.

Tuesday after Thanksgiving (December 1) is my next day out en femme.

I plan to be dressed to kill in time to be at the mall when it opens to shop for a new winter coat and whatever else strikes my fancy.

After shopping, I will drive to New Haven to do outreach at a pair of human sexuality classes at the state university. One class begins during the noon hour and the other class begins in the mid-afternoon, so during the break, I will have a late light lunch at the student center and chat with the professor and other outreach presenters.

I enjoy doing outreach. Typically, there are three or four other presenters: a mixed bag of post-op, pre-op, no-op, male-to-female or female-to-male transsexuals. We each spend five to ten minutes telling the class who we are (our mini-biographies), then the class asks questions.

I have been doing outreach for 3-1/2 years, so many of the questions I encounter are questions I have heard before, but there are always a few questions that are unique and sometimes so unexpected that they force me to think hard about my answer. Those questions are worth the price of admission.

After outreach, I may call it a day or I may have an early dinner if any of the other presenters are interested in dining with me.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Staci buys new shoes

snake-print I needed a pair of brown shoes to go with some earth tone dresses I bought recently.

I checked a few online shoe stores, but nothing caught my eye until I visited Payless ShoeSource and perused their new arrivals. There I found the pictured slingback platform shoe.

Its description reads, “Show off your wild side with this exotic slingback. It features a snake-print patent upper, pretty peep toe, adjustable slingback for a good fit, a padded insole for comfort and a sultry 4" wrapped heel with 1/2" platform. Manmade materials.”

They had my size in stock, so I ordered a pair for $24.99 with free shipping to my local Payless brick and mortar store.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Saturday night photos and Windows Live Writer

CDJanie started using Windows Live Writer to compose posts on her blog.

I was impressed with its image-handling capabilities, so I could not resist trying out the software myself. Downloaded, installed, up and running, I am using Windows Live Writer to compose this post.

IMG_1250aIMG_1253a copy

To test out its image handling prowess, I have inserted and manipulated two more photos of me from Saturday night.

The software offers some cool imaging options. So I added drop shadows and tilted the photos. That was easy!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Why Men Are Becoming More Like Women

Marcus Buckingham writes in The Huffington Post today:

In its recent special on the State of Women, Time magazine announced that the gender wars were over and declared a tie. "It's no longer a man's world," Time concluded. "Nor is it a woman's nation. It's a cooperative, with bylaws under constant negotiation, and expectations that profits be equally shared."

I'm not so sure. In a war, no matter the outcome of a certain skirmish or battle, the winner is the party whose attitudes, behaviors and preoccupations come to dominate the postwar landscape. By this measure, the outcome of the gender wars, if wars they were, is clear: women won.

Read the rest of the story here.

femulating in the shoe department

Femulators tend to have bigger feet than the females they are femulating. Those of us in double-digit women's sizes discover quickly that the selection of shoes is limited.

Recently, I checked every store in a local mall and only found two stores that carried women's shoes in sizes larger than 10: Payless and Sears.

I had better luck online and here are the stores I found that have larger sizes in women's shoes:

BarefootTess.com: up to size 12 15

DesignerShoes.com: up to size 15

dreamshoes: up to size 16

DSW Shoe Warehouse: their search engine goes up to size 15, but it found no women's shoes in sizes 15 or 14 and only sneakers in size 13. The selection started improving at size 12 and smaller.

Endless: up to size 16

Gwyneth Shoes: up to size 15

outletbuy.com: up to size 17.5

Payless ShoeSource: up to size 13; I have bought a lot of shoes from Payless (online and in store) and some of my purchases are the most comfortable shoes I own.

Zappos: up to size 16; I have made two purchases from Zappos and have no complaints. They are fast and they pick up the tab for shipping in both directions!

(Thank you Paula for a correction and an addition.)

Candy... not so dandy?

Candy is a new fashion magazine "completely dedicated to celebrating transvestism, transexuality, cross dressing and androgyny, in all its manifestations."

The first issue is a limited edition print run of 1000 copies, so I doubt if I will have an opportunity to see the magazine, but here is the contents of its first issue (the Fall/Winter 2009/2010 issue):

"Candy Darling" by Kimball Hastings and Bruce Weber
"Lypsinka, Andre J and Joey Arias" by Bruce Weber
"Smart Style" by Tim Walker
"Tribute to Nico" by Benjamin Alexander Huseby
"Bianca Exotica" by Marcelo Krasilcic and Antonio Frajado
"Rodarte" by David Armstrong
"La Crawford" by Popy Blasco and Daniel Riera
"Kim Ann Foxmann" by Silvia Prada and Daniel Riera
"Casa Susanna" by Dean Mayo Davies
"Tribute to Casa Susanna" by Brett Lloyd and Kim Jones
"Johnny Depp style" by Kira Bunse and Jos van Heel
"Angel Marlowe" by Ariadna Pedret and Terry Richardson
"Christian Lacroix" by Karim Sadli and Robbie Spencer

It's just a list of the contents, so it is hard to tell what the list really represents, but the list itself does not seem very exciting or groundbreaking. Candy Darling, Nico, Casa Susanna? Yes, those are trans fashion icons, but they are ancient history.

And what's with the limited 1000 copy print run?

And worse, what's with the biannual publication schedule?

Nice cover, but I just dunno if this magazine will be successful.

Monday, November 16, 2009

celebrate the living

This is Transgender Awareness Week.

Except for a transgender day of remembrance gathering in Hartford, I am not aware of any other local transgender awareness events. Circumstances at work prevent me from attending that gathering, so what can I do?

Maybe I did my part on Saturday night when I attended a fund raiser en femme. I encountered a lot of civilians at the Hartford Hilton and I am sure some/most/all of them were aware that I was trans-something or other. I hope I left them with a favorable impression.

In my opinion, I don't think that day of remembrance gatherings do much good promoting awareness of the trans-community. I am all in favor of honoring those who were killed because they did not conform to society's expectations gender-wise, but these gatherings get little or no publicity outside the GLBT community. And if any these gatherings do get publicity beyond the GLBT community, the general public does not care much because they perceive it as just another death of a social misfit.

To better achieve transgender awareness, we should celebrate the living. The public would be more impressed with stories about living trans-people and their contributions to society. Being a dead trans-person is not very interesting, but being a living trans-person and all that entails is very interesting (I can attest to that).

Our stories can enlighten the general public and make them aware that we are out there everywhere everyday trying to live our lives day-to-day just like they try to do.

my dream log

I have been documenting all my trans-related dreams here and this is a new entry.

Sunday morning, I dreamed I came home from work and looked in the mirror to discover that there were very obvious traces of makeup on my face (smudged red lipstick and black eye makeup). I assume that the makeup was from an outing en femme the day before.

That is all I remember.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

last night


I am not in any pain, but I can feel my calf muscles when I walk today, which is a pleasant reminder that I danced the night away in four-inch heels.

My feet feel fine, but it probably would have been different if I had not made a fashion adjustment before leaving to go out last night to attend One Big Event, the annual fund-raiser for the Hartford Gay and Lesbian Health Collective.

I originally planned to wear a pair of strappy sandals. My toes suffered dearly the one time I wore them out a few years ago, so I stretched the toe straps all week long. It did not help.

After wearing them for a half hour before departing last night, my toes were hurting. I took the sandals off and a purple welt was developing near the base of my big toe on my right foot, so I decided to find a different pair of shoes to wear.

I chose my new sling-back open-toe black patent pumps with a four-inch heel that I bought at Payless last month and it was a wise choice. They were comfortable the entire evening and they were nice looking, too.

(The photo above shows me before and after the fashion adjustment.)

I arrived at the Hartford Hilton at 6PM, found the banquet hall and checked in. There were about 300 people in attendance. Males dominated the attendees at about a 5 to 1 ratio. There were about ten trans girls in attendance and most of us sat at the same table with our SOs and allies.

Everyone was dressed to kill. Some women wore evening gowns, but the majority wore dresses in various styles, so I did not feel at all out of place in my cocktail dress.

Except for my trans friends and the couple whose wedding I attended in September, I knew no one else in attendance, so I mingled with the people I knew and people-watched the people I did not know.

I noticed that I was the object of others who were people-watching; that could be a good thing or a bad thing. No one laughed at me or gave me a dirty look, so maybe it was mostly a good thing.

Robin, who convinced me to attend the event, took the nice photo (right) of me seated at our table, where we had salad, a chicken dinner, and dessert. It was the first time I ever had a cupcake for dessert at this sort of event; it was very tasty.

After dining, there was an auction (to which I paid no attention), a comedian, who was amusing, but not laugh-out-loud funny (in my opinion), and then the music began with a great live band. I danced about 1 out of 3 songs, not because I did not want to dance, but because I lacked a partner. Near the end, I just danced with a group of trans girls and had a great time.

During one dance, the event photographer made a special effort to shoot photos of me dancing. I will have to watch the Health Collective's web site for photos.

I had a wonderful time last night and felt very pleased with myself. Did I forget to mention that when I got on the scale yesterday morning, I discovered that I had lost ten pounds during the past two months? I was very pleased indeed.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

tonight


I am all dolled up and ready to attend a semi-formal/formal tonight.

The advertisement for the event reads "Formal Attire Encouraged," while a past attendee informed me that it is really a "semi-formal" event, yet all the photos I've seen of the event show women in long formal gowns.

No matter, I am wearing a darling, knee-length sleeveless black A-line cocktail dress with goldtone beading along its wide neckline. Black strappy sandals with 4-inch stiletto heels adorn my feet, a gold bracelet graces my wrist, and gold chandelier earrings hang from my earlobes. A gold sequins purse and a black sheer scarf with gold decor complete my ensemble.

The majority of attendees will be civilians with only a handful of trans-people, so I am looking forward to another new experience en femme.

I promise a full report and photos soon.

vintage femulators

As a child of the 1950s, female fashions of the late '50s and early '60s left a big impression on my developing psyche. As a result, today I favor fashions that recall the styles of that era. I actually own some vintage clothing and have worn some of those items out en femme.

In addition to wearing retro and vintage clothing, I also like to view images of how femulators of that era dressed. The book Casa Susanna is a favorite source for viewing such images.

The book contains a collection of snapshots (like the one to the right) taken during the late '50s and early '60s at a safe house in upstate New York, where femulators met to dress and socialize en femme. Images from Casa Susanna appear on the Internet; a quick Google search will reveal a representative selection of those images.

Another source of images of femulators from that bygone era are periodicals. I have seen sample pages from a variety of femulator magazines on the Internet, but I do not own any because they are not easy to the find and are too pricey when I find them.

However, a publisher has recently been "reprinting" vintage periodicals and books from that era in Adobe .pdf format including long gone back issues of Female Mimics at prices that are a bargain when compared to the prices of vintage copies.

I have purchased all of their Female Mimics offerings and I am very pleased with the purchases. And making a purchase could not be easier: you order online, pay online, and a few minutes later, you download your purchase.

So, you go retro, girl!

Friday, November 13, 2009

my take on the poll results

Again, I thank you all 642 of you who responded to my Who Are You poll.

The Results

Most of you (61%) identified as crossdresser; male-to-female transperson followed at 34%, then came transvestite (23%), transgender (22%), and the relatively new term, femulator (19%).

Thirteen (2%) identified as gender performers with 0.9% in the drag performer category and 1% in the impersonator category.

Ninety-five (15%)identified as transsexual and that broke down to 7% in the pre-op category, 7% in the no-op category, and 0.7% in the post-op category.

Only one person identified as a female-to-male transperson.

Ten percent identified as admirer, 6% as just interested, 5% as just curious, and 2% as other.

One percent identified as being related to a trans-person with 0.6% identifying as a significant other and 0.6% identifying as a other relative (not-SO) of trans-person.

For the full results, go here.

My Comments

There is probably a lot of overlapping between categories, for example, a no-op transexual may also identify as transgender and male-to-female trans-person, etc. Despite the potential for overlapping, the poll results still are valuable.

Surprises

Despite the rumors of the demise of the term transvestite, 23% still identify as such.

The number of admirers, just interested, and just curious (23%) responding to the poll was a little surprising. I am not sure how I intended to differentiate just interested and just curious; it seemed to make sense at the time I composed the poll, but that sense escapes me now.

I was very surprised by the number (19%) who identify as femulator, which is a relatively new term invented here. Your acceptance of that term warms my heart.

The number of relatives of trans-persons responding to the poll (only 1%): I thought/hoped that more relatives came here to be informed about the trans-person in their life, but I guess not.

No Surprises

The dearth of genetic women, female-to-male trans-persons, and post-op transexuals responding to the poll: I just don't cater to those groups.

Conclusions

The poll affirms who reads Femulate and I promise to continue to cater to that audience.

By the way, I welcome your comments on the poll especially if you see something I missed. My head is full of cobwebs this morning after surviving a nasty lay-off at work yesterday, so my thinking is not as acute or cute as usual.

poll closed

My Who Are You? poll is closed and the results are below. I thank all 642 of you who voted.

I will post my comments later.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

vote

Today is the last day to vote in my Who Are You? poll (sidebar right), so if you have not voted yet and planned to do so, please vote as soon as possible.

something new

I never got the hang of painting my finger nails. I tried many times and seldom were the results satisfactory.

As they say, "practice makes perfect," and I imagine if I painted my nails more often than once per month, I would get the hang of it.

And if I lived en femme 24/7, I could paint my nails at my leisure and the results would eventually be fabulous, but I am usually rushing to get ready to go out en femme and there is no leisure time. So, I have a collection of fake nails at my fingertips to fulfill my needs.

Most of the time I use Kiss pre-glued, stick-on nails. Using Kiss pre-glued nails, my fingers are "painted" in less than five minutes and the glue is strong enough to keep my nails "painted" for days afterwords (as long as I avoid soaking my hands in hot water, which is how you remove them).

As I have mentioned a few times already, I am attending a semi-formal event on Saturday night and I plan to wear a pair of strappy high-heeled sandals (my intended footwear appears in the accompanying photo). Except for a few thin straps, my feet will be very exposed, so that calls for some toe nail painting.

The only thing worse than my finger nail painting is my toe nail painting! I can count the times I've painted my toe nails on one hand or should I say "foot." It is not a skill that I have had time to acquire.

However, while stocking up on some fake finger nails recently, I noticed that they now sell fake toe nails, too. And Kiss even sells a set that matches my Kiss fingernails, so I snapped up a set the last time I was out shopping to wear Saturday night.

I was a little fearful that the size of the fake toe nails would not match the size of my real nails, but when I got home, I checked and the fake nails are large enough to cover my biggest toe nails.

So, I will be trying something new when I go out en femme on Saturday night.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Chemicals In Everyday Products Turning Boys Into Girls?

By Christopher Gavigan in today's Huffington Post:

A new report from the Danish Department of Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (DEFRA), highlights the critical risks facing toddlers from gender bending chemicals in everyday products. Chemicals like phthalates (found in PVC and fragrances), parabens (found in lotions and sunscreens), and pesticides are increasingly being linked to hormone disruption - and two year olds have more in their blood than previous generations.

What does it mean?

• Today's boys have less sperm...

• More boys are playing like girls. The DEFRA report highlights research from Rotterdam's Erasmus University that found that boys whose mothers were exposed to certain hormone disruptors were more likely to dress up in girl's clothes and play with dolls and tea sets.

• Fewer boys are being born...

• Boys' unmentionables are getting smaller...


Read the whole story here.

This is a very serious matter. Whereas, I am happy with the way things turned out (whether chemicals were responsible or not), I would not wish trans issues on anybody.

my hair removal tools

Yesterday, I mentioned how removing hair is the only part of the art of femulation that I do not like. I love the results, but getting those results is not much fun.

Since hair removal is a "job," my goal is to get it done quickly, but effectively. So, after femulating for the better part of five decades, I have learned a few things about hair removal and I will share the contents of my hair removal toolbox with you.

For my face, I use Gillette's Fusion razor (the manual version) and Edge shaving gel. Fusion's five-blade razor gives me the best shave I have ever had and its built-in trimmer gets those spots that the five blades can't cut.

Speaking of cuts, I have never gotten nicked using Fusion. And regarding Edge, I have also used generic store brand shaving gels and have not noticed any difference between them and Edge.

For my legs, feet, hands, arms, shoulders, and breasts (making sure to avoid the armpits, nipples, and lower neck), I use Veet hair removal cream. It works quickly and does a very thorough job.

Nair works just as well, but I prefer Veet because it comes in a pump dispenser as compared with Nair's squeeze bottle. I find that the pump is neater to use; it dispenses exactly the amount I want where I want it.

For my armpits, nipples, and lower neck area, which are sensitive to chemical hair removal products, I use a Norelco three-head rotary electric razor.

For my armpits, I powder my pits with Gold Bond medicated powder first, then I trim the hair with the sideburn trimmer built into the Norelco.

For my back, I use the Mangroomer electric back hair shaver. It has a folding arm, when unfolded lets you shave those spots on your back that you can't reach with a normal razor. The Mangroomer is battery-powered, but it is not a battery drainer; I have used the Mangroomer numerous times on the original set of batteries and have not noticed any loss of effectiveness.

For my eyebrows, nose, and ears, I use Avon's electronic brow trimmer. It works great to thin out my eyebrows and by removing its adjustable brow guide, it does a great job removing nose and ear hair, too.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

femulating is hard work

My wife often comments that since it takes so long for me to get ready to go out en femme, is it worth it?

Of course, it is worth it (what a silly question), but she does make a legitimate observation, i.e., it does take me a long time to get ready.

My excuse is that I am obsessive compulsive. According to Wikipedia , "The phrase "obsessive-compulsive" has worked its way into the wider English lexicon, and is often used in an offhand manner to describe someone who is meticulous or absorbed in a cause. Such casual references should not be confused with obsessive-compulsive disorder…" (So, I'm not nuts, just a little crazy!)

As a result, when I go out en femme, I want to look as perfect as possible, which means flawless makeup and not a hair showing that should not be showing.

I love putting on makeup and if I have the time, I indulge myself in the makeup process and can while away an hour or so putting on the war paint. But usually I don't have the time and I must get the job done as quickly as possible.

After years of practice, I have my makeup routine down to about 45 minutes if everything goes smoothly. I see no way of reducing that time without cutting corners and I refuse to cut corners, so there is that 45-minute investment put into getting en femme.

The actual dressing is the easy part. I usually have my outfit picked out beforehand and I can have it on from soup to nuts, or should I say from corset to wig in 15 minutes or less.

The wig I wear these days is a "shake and bake" wig. I just shake it out, put it on my head, make a few adjustments, and I'm done. I use self-stick pre-glued nails and they go on in less than five minutes with no muss or fuss. So, once my makeup is on, I can be out the door in less than a half hour.

Now the part I hate: hair depilation.

I am hairy. It is everywhere and depending on what I plan to wear, it can take 30 minutes to an hour just to get rid of it all.

I have long legs and they alone take some time to depilate. If I wear anything other than a long sleeved dress or top, then I have to depilate my arms. If I am wearing anything that exposes my shoulders, then they must be depilated, too. And so it goes for my chest and back if I am wearing anything that is low-cut in the front or back. Shaving my face is a joy in comparison.

When I come face-to-face with my hairy problem, I start thinking that my wife might be right, i.e., is it worth it?

Yes, it's hard work, but I still think it is worth every minute of it.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Monday, Monday

Saturday, Saturday

I am really jazzed about my upcoming night out on Saturday. It is a semi-formal event and I will be dressed to the nines!

I always get jazzed when I attend an event like this en femme, but this event will be different because it is not a transgender event; it is a benefit for the Hartford Gay & Lesbian Health Collective, so there will be a mix of attendees from the LGBT community and from the general public, as well.

I promise a full report and photos afterwords.

yet another womanless pageant

Google has alerted me to a bunch of womanless beauty pageants that have occurred this fall, but none of them were worth mentioning here as they were all of the "man in dress" variety showing little effort to truly femulate.

However, a regular reader of this blog, Ann Onnymus, sent us a link to a set of photos on Picasa from a womanless beauty pageant held in December 2007. There is no other information regarding the photos, but it looks like a high school event. The "girls" worked hard at their femulations, so the photos are definitely worth a peek.

male fashions

I am a fashionista when it comes to female fashion, but I usually do not follow male fashion trends.

However lately, things are getting interesting in the male fashion world from a femulator's perspective as fashion designers promote female-inspired fashions on the male. And unlike past attempts to feminize menswear, the males seem to be taking the bait this time and are wearing skirts, dresses, high heels, etc. out in public, often with make-up and a feminine styled coiffure.

I eyewitnessed these fashion trends when I visited Manhattan back in June and now I am seeing these trends back home in Connecticut. (Just last week here, I spotted a young male Wal*Mart worker in full makeup and a curly coiffure.)

To keep up with what is going on, I have become a regular visitor to two blogs that are on top of the topic, high heels for men and new male fashion. If you are curious, visit those blogs and you will probably be surprised with how some males are dressing these days.

voting

We are approaching the half-way point and so far 412 of you have voted in my poll (thank-you for voting).

If you have not voted, it only takes a few seconds to vote, so I encourage you to do so before the poll closes on Friday.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Friday, November 6, 2009

who are you?

Yesterday, Calie wrote about who reads her blog and it got me thinking about who reads my blog.

Google Analytics provides a lot of information about the readers of my blog. For example, it informs me where you come from, how you get here, what you read here, how long you stay here, etc., but it does not tell me who you are.

So, it is time to conduct a poll to find out who you are. The poll starts today and runs for a week, so please vote, but please only vote once.

Thank-you!

UPDATE:
Viewing the early results, I should not have used "transperson" in the first two selections. So, please ignore the word "transperson" and just consider the selections "male-to-female" and "female-to-male."

(Once the poll starts, I can't change anything, otherwise I would.)

Thursday, November 5, 2009

not amused

The current issue of New Yorker contains a trans-related cartoon.

It depicts a fellow driving down the road passing a warning sign on the side of the road. The sign has the silhouette of a deer standing on its back legs, wearing a skirt and high heels, and reads DEER XDRESSING.

I thought the cartoon was dumb and lacked the quality of cartoons that usually appear in New Yorker.

I was not insulted because the cartoon poked fun at the trans, it was just not funny. The magazine has published cartoons in the past that poked fun at the trans that were funny, but this one was not.

For example, the following is based on a cartoon the magazine published a few years ago. I thought it was much more amusing and witty than this week's offering, but your mileage may vary.