Fantasia Fair from a civilian's perspective

Having attended Fantasia Fair last year and likely to attend again in the future, I found a Provincetown civilian's take on the event very enlightening. You can read all that Seida Bacon wrote here, but I want a highlight a couple of things.

We are lousy tippers.

Seida works at an eatery in Provincetown and wrote, "Now, y'all don't get me wrong-- I love all my Trans sisters & brothers. Just another color of the rainbow. It's just that they're so damned stingy with their tips! Worse than the Lesbians of Women's Week. (Although generally less demanding than the Dykes.) I guess they're stingy because they're saving up for the next surgery or new outfit. One day, tips totalled less than $8 for the entire day! Come on, girls! Seida's got to make a living too! I need new outfits (and wigs, makeup, etc.) too!"

We are not fashionistas.

"Trannies could use some style tips... Makeup, clothing, hair, accessories, etc. from the [drag] queens. If I saw another 6' 'gal' this week in ugly flats, boring black business skirt and mis-matched blouse, topped by a most atrocious polyester matted wig, I thought I would abduct her, take her home and glamorize her! Maybe that's what happened to Ashley... She found a Trannie to train! I mean, you came to Ptown to live a full week as your alternate gender self! Live it up! Let your hair down (or put it up). Everybody here knows you're Trans, and we love you anyway and call you by your girl (or boy) names. Even if you never tip and still walk like a lumberjack."

To tell you the truth, I may be guilty on both counts.

I usually tip 15 to 20% unless the service is lousy, so depending on what is considered "stingy," I might be a lousy tipper in some service people's eyes.

During the day at Fantasia Fair, I usually dressed conservatively to fit in (as in the photo above right), but like Seida wrote, everyone knows we are trannies, so why not glam it up. Next time, I will take her advice and glam it up 24/7.

four five-foot teners

Femulate reader Molly Harris alerted me that fashion model Emily Caillon is 5’10” tall and coincidentally, I discovered three other fashion models, who are 6’ minus 2” tall: Daisy Lowe, Guinevere Van Seenus (above left), and Lara Stone (above right).

I am happy to add these four lovely ladies to my Famous Females of Height List.

welcome to the center of the blog universe

Last night, I was settling in to watch the only television show I never miss, 30 Rock. With a few minutes to go before the show and my laptop in my lap, I decided to check my blog to make sure it has not blown up.

In all my years of my blogging, no blog of mine has ever blown up, so checking my blog is more of a motherly thing... just checking in to see that everything is alright with my baby.

Turned out that everything was copacetic with the blog, so I scanned the "Newest Postings From My Blog List" sidebar to see if any of the blogs I follow have any new postings. I blink my eyes because I could not believe what I saw, a new posting from Beck's Cafe titled "Femulate: Center of the blog universe."

Whoa! What's this all about?

I skip over to Beck's Cafe as fast as my trackpad would take me and read Rebecca's very kind words about my blog and her claim that Femulate is in fact, the center of the blog universe because among other things, it is a big source of traffic for other trans-related blogs.

Wow! I felt so undeserving of such praise (and turned red as a beet) especially since I was unaware of Femulate's referral power. A few people have mentioned to me in the past that they get some traffic from my blog, but I was not aware of how much traffic as well as how many blogs get that traffic. So, this was quite a revelation.

All I can say is, "Thank you, Rebecca" and "Wow!"

Hate Crime Bill Including Trans Passed by Senate

"The Senate passed groundbreaking legislation Thursday that would make it a federal crime to assault an individual because of his or her sexual orientation or gender identity," so says CNN.

Read all about it here.

a puzzle

(updated below)

What do you call a male who believes she is a female, but is happy living in her male body?

She has no interest in taking hormones or having surgery to change her male body into an approximation of a female body.

She lives part-time as a male and part-time as a female, but prefers living as a female. If the circumstances of her marriage and employment were different, she would live full-time as a female.

What do you call such a person?

UPDATE: I was describing myself when I wrote this post. I was curious how other people would label someone like me, so that if someone asked, I could tell them what I am.

Since there was no real consensus, I will just tell them that I am "me."

he femulated gallery

By popular demand, I created a new web page, the He Femulated Gallery, that archives all the images that previously appeared in the "He Femulated" sidebar (left).

The archive also includes the "Crossdressed in the Past" images that I have featured here in the blog on occasion, as well as other femulation images of interest.

The new web page is a work-in-progress and I will probably break it up into multiple pages because of its length.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.

Staci needs new shoes

(updated below)

I gave up looking in the local brick and mortar shoe stores for gold strappy sandals to wear to the formal I am attending next month. That color and style of shoe is not easy to find in my size. So I went shopping online at Endless and Zappos.

Nice thing about these two online retailers is that they provide free shipping both ways, i.e., not only will they ship you your order for free, but if you want to return something, they also pay for the return shipping. I wish the online woman's clothing retailers had the same deal; if they did, I would definitely order more clothing online than I do now.

Back to the shoe. I found four candidates, two on each web site. To help make my decision, I read the previous buyers' comments about the shoes paying special attention to any comments about comfort or lack thereof. (I already own too many pairs of fabulous looking shoes that make my feet cry.)

I chose a J. Reneé sandal dubbed "Glamour" (photo above right) from Zappos. Within an hour, I received an e-mail confirming my order and notifying me that they are upgrading its shipment from free standard shipping (4 to 5 business days) to special priority shipping (also free), which means my shoes ship later today.

Yay!

UPDATE: The sandals arrived today and they are absolutely gorgeous, but they are about one size too small (I ordered my size, but this shoe runs small). The sandals do not come in a larger size, so I am back to square one looking for gold strappy sandals to wear to the formal.

Darn!

Provincetown this week, last year

(updated below)

One year ago today, I drove to Provincetown, Massachusetts, to spend the week on the tip of Cape Cod participating in Fantasia Fair.

The past few days, the weather in Southern New England (cold, damp, windy, overcast, gloomy, and downright depressing) reminded me of the weather in Provincetown that week, which was also cold, damp, windy, overcast, gloomy, but not depressing because it was my first time at Fantasia Fair and as a first-timer, I was full of anticipation about what my week en femme would bring.

In general, I was not disappointed. (You can read my adventure at Fantasia Fair here.) By week's end, I was so enthusiastic about the experience that I thought I would return this year. But after returning to the planet Earth, I reconsidered.

For one thing, it is an expensive getaway. Luckily, I live close enough that I can drive to Provincetown in a few hours, so transportation is not a big expense. However, the event itself costs $675 for the whole week, less if you go for a half-week, and a room costs $100 per night more or less depending where you stay. Figure in another $100 or two to cover incidentals and you are looking at $2000 in expenses.

In light of the economy and the industry I work in, facing an extra $2000 in bills was a little scary.

The other thing is familiarity. I don't go to the state fair every year because I will see the same pigs. So, instead of going every year, I skip a year and encounter some new pigs by doing so. Same with Fantasia Fair. If I went again this year, it would seem so familiar, like watching a rerun of last year and for $2000, I don't want a rerun.

One of the big selling points of Fantasia Fair is that it is a town-wide event. You are not stuck in one hotel for the event; instead you are welcome throughout the town and you can go out en femme wherever and whenever you want. Personally, I don't need Fantasia Fair to go out en femme. As long as I avoid establishments with motorcycles out front, I feel comfortable going wherever I wish, so that part of Fantasia Fair's attraction is not an attraction for me.

On the other hand, I feel bad about not being able to reacquaint myself with all the friends I made in Provincetown last year. As I sit at my computer writing this, I am monitoring a Provincetown web cam located about two blocks from the hotel where I stayed last year, hoping to catch a glimpse of a friend. (So far, I have not recognized anyone.)

In addition to wanting to see my friends and acquaintances from last year, I also want to perform in the Fantasia Fair Follies. (Last year, I chose to model in the Fantasia Fair fashion show over performing in the Follies.)

All that being said, I plan to return to Fantasia Fair next year.

UPDATE: Casually monitoring the web cam all morning, I have seen only one trans woman from Fantasia Fair and it was someone I did not recognize. She was wearing a name badge on a lanyard around her neck and she asked someone to take her photo in front of the town hall, so I am kind of sure that she was a Fantasia Fair attendee.

never on a Sunday

This Sunday finds some controversy on the femulation front.

On the right side of the Atlantic, there is a big brouhaha over a calendar released by a Spanish LGBT rights organization. The calendar mimics religious paintings and features transgender models dressed like the Virgin Mary. (photo right)

This is not sitting well in the predominantly Catholic Spain.

Meanwhile back in the States, Peaches alerted me to this story about Morehouse College's new dress code that bans its students from wearing female attire.

Morehouse is an all male college and the crossdressing ban is aimed at "about five students who are living a gay lifestyle."

The campus' gay organization supported the ban with a 24 to 3 vote.

So far, I have been unable to determine whether the crossdressing students are transgender or not.

WWJD?

Click the image to enlarge it.

updates

Dunno if you noticed, but two weeks ago, I added a blurb below my profile in the right sidebar that announces updates to my web pages.

The latest update is "yet another new Halloween adventure in which Staci dresses like Britney dressing like a schoolgirl."

And FYI, the previous update announced another "new Halloween adventure in which Staci goes to work en femme again."

So, be sure to check the "what's new on my pages:" blurb occasionally so that you don't miss anything!

male modernization

Click on the image to enlarge it.

like mother, like son

Click on the image to make it bigger!

shopping

(updated below)

I exchanged e-mails with Patty, my de facto fashion consultant, on Friday and she was not too happy with my choice of dress for the formal I will be attending next month. She liked the dress (a Mad Men retro style sheath), but she did not think it was formal enough for a formal.

I agreed and began looking around for something else.

Jessica London sent me an e-mail that resulted in a 40% discount on one item, so I looked around their Web site and found a dress that both Patty and I thought was perfect for the event. It is a simple black A-line with goldtone beading along the neckline (see photo above). I ordered the dress and await its delivery.

I need shoes to go with the dress, so I checked out the Payless Web site and found some likely candidates. I know my local Payless restocks on Tuesday, so I planned to go there at lunch time to shop.

I am getting wiser in my old age. In anticipation of my Payless visit, I put on a pair of knee-highs and wore them to work under my socks and I took off my socks before I drove to Payless.

I know that Payless has peds in the store, but I dislike having to remove my socks to put on peds in the store if the store is busy. I don't want to attract a lot of attention. Trying on heels is attention-getting enough, but removing socks and putting on the peds just adds more potential attention-getting time, so I came prepared with knee-highs on and socks off. As it turned out, I was the only customer in the store.

Payless had one pair in stock in my size that I liked when I saw it online, a stacked peep-toe slingback (see photo below). I tried it on and it fit perfectly, so I bought it.

Payless is having a buy-one and get-one half-off promotion, but there was no other shoe that I liked that fit. The cashier reminded me of the promotion when I cashed out and I told her that I could not find anything else.

She then informed me that they will be restocking this afternoon and if I bring back my receipt, I can still take advantage of the promotion if I find anything else that I like.

Online, they showed a pair of gold strappy sandals that I thought would go perfect with my dress, so I will go back tomorrow and see what they have.

A local trans Halloween party is in the works for the 29th and I plan to go as a Roaring Twenties flapper. I already have a dress that will do: a gold sequins short-sleeved tunic. All I need is accessories, so after shopping at Payless, I visited the party store next door and purchased everything I needed: a black feathered flapper headpiece, a black garter, a six-foot long black boa, and two long strings of beads.

Woo woo!
UPDATE: I went back to Payless on Wednesday and they had nothing new in the Amazonian sizes I wear.

gender on my mind

Most people do not think much about their gender. They go about their lives, day-to-day, interacting with their world without considering their gender. They are acclimated to the role that meets society's expectations for their gender and their lives go on with few, if any any issues related to gender.

On the other hand, some people think about their gender all the time. Thoughts about their gender fill their waking hours. They are not acclimated to the gender role that meets society's expectations. Everywhere they turn, issues arise that cause conflicts in their mind related to gender.

If you are a regular reader of this blog, you probably are in the latter group of people rather than the former. I know I am.

Gender is on my mind most of the time. When I get dressed in the morning, I often think about how I would prefer donning a female wardrobe rather than a male wardrobe. When I interact with society during my day, I often ask myself, "what would 'she' do?" in certain situations and how would society react to "she," rather than 'he." Even when I am asleep, I cannot get away from it because most of my dreams concern gender issues.

Sometimes, when I find myself thinking about gender, I berate myself because I feel I should be doing something more constructive than thinking about gender. And I wonder how my life would be if I resolved my gender issues, that is, if I lived as a woman 24/7, would all my thoughts and concerns about gender go away? Then would I be able to accomplish more than I am accomplishing now?

I fear that the answer is "no." Gender would still be on my mind. Some new gender issues would occupy my time and some old gender issues would haunt me.

Such is the lot of a transgender.

red is your color

Click on the image to increase its size.

new Halloween adventure:at work en femme again

I added a new Halloween adventure to My Adventures in Femulation: "at work en femme again."

I hope you enjoy it!

the femulation of Martin Cohn

Last week, I wrote here about male model Martin Cohn, who modeled a cocktail dress at the recent Elise Overland's SS10 fashion show.

Upon further investigation, I discovered that on a daily basis, Mr. Cohn usually dons clothing that is at least androgynous (above left) and often downright feminine (above center).

I also discovered that his cocktail dress catwalk gig last month was not his first foray into modeling women's wear. For example, he appeared en femme modeling a Marc Jacobs skirt (above right) and posed as Candy Darling for an Interview magazine photoshoot.

Wow!

The Sisterhood of the Panty Girdle

Back when I started femulating in the early 1960s, most women wore girdles.

"Girdles were considered essential garments by many women from approximately 1910 to the late 1960s. They created a rigid, controlled figure that was seen as eminently respectable and modest. They were also crucial to the couturier Christian Dior's 1947 New Look, which featured a voluminous skirt and a narrow, nipped-in waistline, also known as a wasp waist.

"Later in the 1960s, the girdle was generally supplanted by pantyhose. Pantyhose replaced girdles for many women who had used the girdle essentially as a means of holding up sheer nylon stockings. Those who want more control purchase "control top" pantyhose. Many women forgo wearing girdles, stockings, and pantyhose entirely." (source Wikipedia)

I know for a fact that all the females in my household wore girdles when I began femulating and I wore a girdle, too. It held up my stockings, held in my belly, and helped give me a feminine figure.

When panythose replaced stockings, I continued to wear a girdle and still wear one today. In addition to shaping my body, it provided another function that became very important when my femulation took me out of the house: a girdle provided an effective way of hiding my private parts. It was more effective and more comfortable than wearing a gaff.

Today, few women wear girdles. I know for a fact that none of the females in my household wear girdles, but I still wear one. My guess is that a lot of other "girls" who started femulating back when I started still include a girdle or two in their wardrobe.

Long live the Sisterhood of the Panty Girdle!

tall Thursday

My tall-radar spotted two actresses on television last week, who meet the minimum requirements for my Famous Females of Height list:

5'8' - Olivia Wilde - Actress - television's House (above left)

5'10" - Wendie Malick - Actress - television's Just Shoot Me (above right)

Meanwhile, Peaches e-mailed me about 6'0" Jane Castor, the chief of police of Tampa, FL.

Crossdressing Student Kicked Out Of Georgia High School

(updated below)

From today's The Huffington Post, "16-year-old Jonathan Escobar has been kicked out of his Georgia high school for dressing too much like a girl. Escobar disputes this saying that when he first moved to Georgia from Miami, he cleared his style of dress with school authorities and they gave him the OK."

Read the rest of the story and view a video here.

UPDATE: The link to the video is gone, but this one may still be good on YouTube.

24 days until Halloween

Less than four weeks until Halloween and I haven't a thing to wear!

It's not that I have not been considering what costume to wear on National Femulation Day; I do have a cute costume in mind. The problem is that I have no place to wear it!

Should I buy the costume and keep my fingers crossed that I will receive an invitation to a Halloween party? Should I buy it anyway (party or not) and keep it handy in case a costume emergency occurs?

Party or not, there is always the "go to work en femme option."

I have done it twice in the past, but both times my employer was sponsoring a Halloween costume contest. So far, my employer is mum on the subject, so I don't know if anything is in the works this year.

In the past, when my employer had no plans for Halloween, I thought about girling it up anyway. A few people always show up in costume, so I would not be alone, but so far, I have not had the nerve to do it.

Maybe this year.

my eyebrows and yours

I visited our public library and took out a book titled Beautiful Brows: The Ultimate Guide to Styling, Shaping, and Maintaining Your Eyebrows by Nancy Parker and Nancy Kalish.

I always worry about my eyebrows because I am not sure I am doing them correctly. And I am not sure because there is a dearth of information about how to do your eyebrows in comparison to the vast amount (and contradictory) information on how to makeup other parts of your face.

This book is a godsend and answers all my questions about doing eyebrows. Actually, I was in the ballpark in the way I have been doing my eyebrows, but there was one big revelation in the book that changes the way I do my brows.

Everything I've read in the past says not to pluck the strays above your eyebrows and I have followed that advice religiously. This book deflates that advice and says to go ahead and pluck above, as well as below.

Immediately after reading that passage, I dropped the book, went to the bathroom, and plucked all the strays above my eyebrows! Now my eyebrows look neat and feminine even in boy mode.

Wednesday redux

Back to work after a week's vacation, I soon ran into my friend and co-worker, who I saw Wednesday evening when I was en femme attending a conference.

We exchanged "good mornings" and she gave no indication that she saw me on Wednesday evening.

I did not see her until about an hour into the conference even though she was sitting just two rows in front of me, so chances are that she did not see me at all. And if she did see me, she did not seem to recognize me.

'Nuff said.

recent femulations of note

My incoming e-mail revealed two recent femulations of note.

Anonymous e-mailed me about the senior boys of Rains High School in Texas, who participated in a womanless wedding last Saturday. You can view photos from the event here on flickr.

The quality of femulation was very good and some of the girls looked stunning (for example, the young lady in the photo above left).

Paula Grant informed me about Martin Cohn, a male model posing as a female modeling a cocktail dress at Elise Overland's SS10 fashion show on September 13 in New York City. You can read all about it here on Black Book and view Martin's image above right.

The Black Book article claims that Martin wore fake boobs, but I don't think so.

wonderful Wednesday

I went out en femme Wednesday evening wearing my new purple sweater dress (see photo right).

An Aside of Staci --- Making up, I used a mascara with a built-in vibrator, Maybelline's Pulse Perfection™ by Define-A-Lash® Vibrating Mascara. It was the second time I used it. The first time, I was a little hesitant and I really did not let it loose, but on Wednesday, I felt more confident and now I am raving about it.

The vibrator does a more thorough job of painting my lashes than I could ever accomplish applying mascara manually. It even painted lashes that I did not know I had!

Usually, I apply mascara at least three times before I am satisfied. With the vibrating mascara, it did a very thorough job the first time; the second pass was gilding the lily.

A Tip --- If you use a vibating mascara, don't turn on the vibrator until you have the mascara brush positioned on your lashes. After each sweep away from your lashes, turn off the vibrator, then restart it only after you have the brush positioned on your lashes again. This method worked very well for me; your mileage may vary.

All girled-up and out the door, my first stop was my favorite Dress Barn, where I shopped for a new winter coat and a new dress to wear to the formal I will be attending next month.

I found nothing in coats that I liked that fit, but I did find a great dress to wear to the formal. It is retro (like me). As soon as I saw it, I imagined Christina Hendricks wearing it on Mad Men and then I imagined myself wearing it to the formal. It fit like a glove, so I bought it.

My second stop was Avenue where I tried on some sweater coats. Nothing really interested me enough to make a purchase, so I left Avenue empty-handed.

(Actually, I was very unimpressed with the selection of clothing in the store. It was my first time shopping there and I don't think I will go out of my way to shop there again.)

My third and last stop was a Four Points Sheraton hotel, where I would meet my female friend, Holly, and go to a conference she invited me to attend.

The conference was a sales pitch for The Landmark Forum. I knew this going in, so it was not a bait and switch scenario.

It was all very intriguing and I am seriously considering attending the forum. The only drawback is that it is expensive, but I may be able to convince my employer to pay for it.

Speaking of my employer, after we were seated in the conference room with approximately 150 to 200 other attendees, I noticed a woman seated two rows ahead of us, who happens to work with me and is someone I consider as a friend.

Immediately, the gears in my mind begin spinning.

She does not know I am trans. However, about a year ago, shortly after she started working at my place, she stopped by my cubicle and literally checked me out, concentrating on my face. Then she said something like, "I wanted to see what you look like."

I was very puzzled and then she dropped the other shoe: she heard I did drag on Halloween and wanted to see what I looked like en homme. Satisfied, she left my cubicle.

I went to work en femme for a Halloween contest back in 2003. I was surprised that five years later, people were still talking about it. I was curious, so later in the afternoon, I visited her to find out who spilled the beans.

It seems she was in a meeting and joked that the company should have a cross-gender day where all the women come in dressed like men and all the men come in dressed as women (sounds like a great idea to me!). Someone else in the meeting, who has been with the company awhile, chimed in about how well I did drag.

She asked me what I wore and I told her about my pinstripe suit and auburn wig. Then, I told her I would e-mail her a photo, which I did immediately.

She responded that I looked very good, had good taste, and maybe I could do it again if the company decided to have another Halloween event.

I responded that I might wear a costume on Halloween whether there was a special Halloween event or not.

She responded, "Why not."

Since breaking the ice with her then, we have become very friendly and chat frequently. She has become my best female friend at work, but she does not know I am trans.

I wondered if she saw me walk into the conference room Wednesday evening. Even if she did see me, I doubt if she recognized me because I look very different from the photo I sent her, but you never know.

While the sales pitch went on, I considered coming out to her. I know she is very accepting and trustworthy, so I felt I could share my secret with her. Also, since she is the administrator for my division's president, I thought she might be a good ally to have in case I decided to come out at work.

But as soon as there was a break in the sales pitch, she left the conference never to return.

I am on vacation this week, so I will not see her at work until Monday. I will be surprised if she says anything because I don't think she recognized me. I will keep you posted.

Getting back to the conference, over half the attendees were graduates of the program and they were very friendly and outgoing. Some of them were acquaintances of Holly and came over to speak with her. Holly introduced me to each one of them and I joined the conversation if I had anything to add.

No one reacted to me in a negative way. They all were very willing to engage me in conversation.

One woman went out of her way to come over to say to me that she "loved my shoes."

Another woman came over during the break and told me that she knew me. I was sure I did not know her. She listed the possible venues she thought she knew me from, but I was not involved with any of them, so she concluded that I looked very much like another woman. Needless to say, that was very affirming.

At the beginning of the sales pitch, the speaker asked the graduates of the program to volunteer to tell why they invited their guest. Holly raised her hand each time, but she never got called upon. After listening to about 15 graduates tell us why they invited their guests, the speaker told the rest of the graduates to tell their guests one-on-one why they invited them.

Holly turned to me and warmed my heart when she told me why she invited me. She said I am one of her heroes not only because I go out en femme, but more broadly because I persist in expressing my truth in a world that provides very little affirmation for what is true for me.

I still feel a glow when I think about what she said. It made a wonderful evening so perfect!

her royal high-ness

Rania Al Abdullah, the Queen of Jordan, is 5'9" tall and joins our Famous Females of Height list.

out this evening

I am looking forward to going out en femme this evening.

I will be attending an outing among civilians: a seminar at a local hotel. I will meet a female friend, who invited me to the seminar, and we will attend the seminar together.

I also plan to do some shopping before the seminar. I am looking for a dress to wear to the formal I will be attending in November and I am also looking for a new winter coat.

queen complains to princess

August 1967

During the "Summer of Love," I was 16 years old and constantly experimenting with the wardrobes of my mother and sister whenever I was home alone. Always mindful that someone might come home at any minute, I dressed, painted my face, posed in the mirror, then reversed the process as quickly as possible.

I was confused as can be, but I knew what I liked and I liked dressing up and making up and becoming a young woman even for a few fleeting minutes. I cherished my girl-time alone, but I had no idea where it would all lead.

One day, I thought I found the answer in the August 11, 1967, issue of Life magazine.

In the news section of that issue was a short article titled "Now the Mini has a man in it." According to the article, "In a 'spontaneous' fashion happening miniskirts for men have begun showing up in Paris, Munich, London and Tokyo." The article included photos of miniskirted men (see above) in Europe and Japan

I was surprised, but I was also very happy because I naively assumed that the fad would catch on and it would not be long before boys in the USA would be wearing miniskirts, too. Then, I could go public wearing the skirts and dresses I loved.

It didn't happen. I waited patiently, but that fad never caught on. However, eventually, I did go public wearing the skirts and dresses I loved.

C'est la vie.

gray Sunday

The weather is gray and wet and I am staying indoors fighting a head cold.

I have an invitation to go out en femme Wednesday evening, so I hope to be rid of this cold by then.

It should be an interesting evening out Wednesday attending a seminar where the majority of attendees will be civilians, i.e., non-trans-people. So, I am looking forward to it.

The silver lining in the yesterday's cloud (where I ruined two dresses in the wash) is that I have to shop for new dresses to replace the ones I ruined. So, if I am out of the house early enough, I hope to get in a little shopping en femme, too.

good luck raising that gender-neutral child

In this interesting Salon article, Lise Eliot explains how slight biological differences in boys and girls can turn into a yawning divide in adults.

a dream come true

Yesterday, I wrote about my dream from the previous night.

As you may recall, I wrote that during my dream, "I noticed a large orange-colored stain in the lap area of my dress, but I was perplexed as to the source of the stain."

Today, I laundered five dresses. When I pulled the dresses out of the washing machine, two were ruined with large orange stains.

I assume that there was still some bleach in the washing machine from the previous load of clothing and that the bleach did the damage.

What a nightmare!

last night's dream

I seldom remember my dreams and when I do remember a dream, it is usually trans-related.

Overnight, I dreamed I was out en femme. I cannot recall where I went or what I did. However, I do recall wearing a black sheath dress.

At the end of my outing en femme, I noticed a large orange-colored stain in the lap area of my dress, but I was perplexed as to the source of the stain. I wondered if maybe I went out with the dress already stained.

And so it goes.

traveling exhibit focuses on transgender people

From today's edition of the San Luis Obispo Tribune:

"Arthur Robinson Williams wants his fellow medical students to know more about the unique challenges of patients who are lesbian, gay, transgender and bisexual."

"So he has produced a traveling documentary exhibit, "My Right Self: Transgender Considerations." It's composed of 25 photos and personal stories. Each photo is accompanied by the subject's words. Each person and their partner tells their intimate story about their decision to change gender and how it affected their lives and relationships."

Read the rest of the story here and visit the My Right Self Web site here.

dressing Jude Law in drag

The headline reads:

"Jude Law in Drag! 'Rage' Costume Designer Talks About the Actor's Custom-Made Wedding Gown"

Read all about it here.

5'10" x 2

Lately, one of the cable movie channels has been playing the 1971 film Cold Turkey incessantly. The female lead in the film is Pippa Scott (above left) and in a few scenes of the film, I noticed that she was right up there height-wise with the male lead Dick Van Dyke. Upon further investigation, I discovered that Ms. Scott is 5'10" and deserves a spot on the Famous Females of Height List.

Just as I was dotting the I's and crossing the T's on the previous paragraph, a missive from Peaches came in over the DSL informing me that television actress Roma Maffia (above right) of Nip/Tuck and Boston Legal fame was also 5'10" and deserves a spot on "the List."

"new" adventures in femulation

I added two stories to my collection of adventures in femulation:

fantasia fair, a diary describing my experience attending that transworld-renowned week-long event for the first time in October 2008. (That's me in the photo all ready for a Fantasia Fair evening outing.)

womanhattan, a diary recounting my five-day stay en femme in New York City in June 2009.

dining and shopping

I am still tweaking the blog's Web pages.

In addition to fixing things I missed, I updated two of "My Adventures in Femulation," dining out en femme and shopping en femme.

Things have changed for the better since I originally wrote those pieces. I now go everywhere and anywhere to dine and shop en femme without thinking twice. The updates reflect this change for the better.

a half million

Overnight, the hit counter of this blog passed the half million mark!

I enjoy writing this blog and I am honored that so many of you come back to read what I write.

Thank you for your continued support!

a formal in my future

I will be attending a formal, black tie affair this fall.

One Big Event is a "benefit celebration" for the Hartford Gay and Lesbian Health Collective. The event will be held on November 14 at the Hilton Hotel in downtown Hartford.

Some of my trans friends are attending and asked me to join them. This is a big local event and besides the GLBT crowd, there usually are local politicians and celebrities in attendance.

Like I said, it is a formal affair and I have "nothing" to wear. That is not true; I just have to decide what to wear from the "Staci Collection." I have a couple of vintage items I have never worn out and I am seriously considering wearing them. Then again, something new and to-die-for may come along and catch my attention

I have a lot of time to make up my mind!

the color purple

For the last three weeks, I have been trying to chase down a cable sweater dress that I saw on the Dress Barn web site. None of the Dress Barns around here have the dress in stock yet.

With a 20% off coupon expiring today, I decided to visit Dress Barn again hoping that the cable sweater dress had arrived. No luck, but they had a purple cable sweater dress in stock. It has short sleeves, a turtleneck collar, falls just above my knees, and now is hanging in my closet.

Funny that just yesterday, I mentioned to my friend Patty that I was sick and tired of all the purples I've seen in the fall collections, then the next thing you know, I am adding another purple item to my wardrobe!

under construction

GeoCities, which hosts all of this blog's external pages, is going away next month. As a result, I am in the process of moving all my external pages to Google Sites. So, if an external page does not come up when you click on its link or if you discover a problem on an external page, please let me know so I can fix it.

GeoCities was the place where many trans people (like me) built their first personal Web sites and I feel sad about its upcoming demise.

In addition to moving all of my blog's external Web pages to Google Sites, I made some other changes.

I changed the caption of the FEMULATE THIS: image to FEMULATE HER:

I changed the caption of the THE FEMULATED: image to HE FEMULATED:

I deleted the link to my photos and images and I deleted my flickr account.

I deleted my flickr account because I was sick and tired of flickr users who wanted to be my "contact," who had no images to share or worse, had images to share that displayed private parts. When I logged onto flickr today, I had four contact requests and all four had their private parts on display. Yuck!!! I had it and pulled the plug on flickr.

To replace the flickr account deletion, I plan to add a gallery of my photos and images to my blog's external pages real soon now.

feminizing menswear for real

This is Fashion Week in New York City.

Again, the catwalks are rife with menswear that borrows heavily on clothing from milady's closet.

Some designers are determined to feminize male fashions, so we see high-heeled male models wearing makeup and carrying their manbags down the runway with lace, ruffles, and bows accenting their pantalettes, kilts, and caftan outfits.

As a femulator and fashionista who loves female clothing and accoutrements, I feel that the designers responsible for feminizing menswear are not going far enough.

Stop pussyfooting around! If you want males wearing feminized clothing, go all the way.

Instead of separating menswear and womenswear, have both male and female models walking down the runways wearing next season's womenswear. Then you'd have something of interest to both fashion-conscious males and femulators.

As a femulator, I would not be caught dead in the current version of feminized menswear, but if they were showing womenswear for males, then I'd open my pocketbook to spend some money.

girl talk

I do not have a lot of male friends, partly because I do not participate in many male pursuits and partly because I do not interact well with many males. Both reasons have a lot to do with my preference for the female side of life.

I do not participate in many female pursuits either, but I do interact well with females.

Over the years, I have had more female friends than male friends. I always felt very comfortable conversing and confiding with my female friends and acquaintances, but seldom felt that comfortable with other males.

But being a male, my female friends and acquaintances usually seemed guarded to some degree when dealing with me because I was male.

Reflecting on my June NYC adventure en femme and on attending a wedding for the first time en femme on Saturday, I realized that the females I encountered while I was en femme acted differently with me than the females I encountered when in boy mode. In a nutshell, they dropped their guard and interacted with me as if I was one of the girls.*

I so enjoyed participating in "girl talk" in NYC and at the wedding. I discovered that I can be a little chatterbox and that the women I conversed with seemed to enjoy chatting with me.

Girl talk brings a whole new area of enjoyment into femulating for me. It is something that I never expected, but now I relish the opportunity to talk with the girls again.

* Yes, I know in my heart that I really am "one of the girls," but it always surprises me when other people think I am one of the girls, too.

images of New England Trans Pride

On Friday, I wrote about the upcoming New England Trans United Pride March and Rally on October 3 in Northampton, MA.

Again, I urge every trans person who lives in the upper right corner of the USA to attend the event if they can.

If you never attended such an event in the past, I list some links below where you can view photos and videos from the first New England Trans Pride event of June 2008. If you are on the fence about attending, I hope that viewing these images will push you over the edge.

• Diana's photos and videos
• Donna Rose's photos
• GLAD's photos
• Glen Koetzner's photos
• Lynn's photos
  

"she"

Now that I am well-rested and able to reflect with a clearer head about attending my first wedding en femme, I recalled something that I did not mention in yesterday's blog posting.

During the evening, I participated in a number of conversations with two or more people and during those conversations, it was such a pleasure to hear someone refer to me as "she."

I know it is such a little thing, a simple three-lettered word, but whenever I hear that word when it refers to me, it makes me so very happy.

Although "She" can mean different things, they are all good things.

"She" can mean that people have respect for the way I have chosen to present myself, that is, as a female, or

"She" can mean that people have accepted my female presentation, or

"She" can mean that people believe that I am female.

a lovely time

I attended the garden wedding of two of my friends at their home on Saturday evening. It was a beautiful and unique affair and it will always stand out from all the other weddings I have attended throughout my life.

It was a small affair in that the guest list was composed of of only 50 or so family and friends, but it was really a big affair because it was a very family-and-friend-oriented and vibrant event. Vibrant because it was a wedding where the kids were invited and included (most weddings I have attended in the past has excluded kids. Who said "youth is wasted on the young?")

I was very honored that my friends invited me to attend. They did not give me permission to attend en femme and I did not have to ask for their permission to attend en femme. They know me as Staci and expected Staci to attend. Friends like these must be cherished and I will always hold a special place in my heart for them.

Like my friends, their family and friends accepted me into their circle, treated me like an old friend of the family, and I could not have felt more comfortable. Except for the wedded couple and two other friends who were guests, I did not know a soul going in and in such circumstances, I become shy, but the other guests made me feel as comfortable as possible and I had a wonderful time socializing, dining, drinking, and dancing the night away!

I wore a new dress and a new hairdo to the wedding. I received some compliments on how I looked, which just added to the wonder of the evening.

Being a garden affair, I quickly had to learn how to walk in spike heels without sinking into the lawn. The trick is to walk on your toes and not put much weight on your heels.

I had a lovely time attending my friend's wedding en femme and I will remember it all my life.

get back hair

This morning, I shaved those body parts that should hairless when I am dressed en femme. This was my annual full-body depilation that I perform every September in anticipation of my first time out en femme. (I am going to my first wedding en femme this evening.)

This year, the task was quicker than in the past because it was the first time I used my Mangroomer back hair shaver to remove my back, chest, shoulder, and upper arm hair. The main attraction of the Mangroomer is that it has a extendable and adjustable handle that allows you to reach all areas of your back. I am 5'14" tall and had no problem shaving the far reaches of my back.

The Mangroomer costs $39.99 and is well-worth the price.

three weeks 'til Trans Pride

In three weeks, Saturday, October 3, the New England Trans United Pride March will kick off at noon from Lampron Park in Northampton, MA. The march will proceed down Main Street to the Armory Street lot where an afternoon-long rally will begin at 1 PM. The rally will include a variety of political speakers, transgender activists, and performers.

For more information, visit the New England Trans United Web site.

This will be New England's second trans pride march and rally. The first occurred in June 2008, also in Northampton.

I attended that first event and it was an exciting day for me and the other participants as we ran the trans flag up the flagpole to see who would salute it. The October 3 event promises to be just as exciting and I hope I can attend.

If you have never attended a pride march and rally, but are considering attending this Trans Pride event, have no fear. Northampton is a very diverse community (think of it as a landlocked Provincetown). Nobody will hassle you because you are trans and you will not be alone because there will be hundreds of your trans brothers and sisters in attendance.

Northampton is strategically located smack dab in the the center of Southern New England right off I-91, so it is only a two- or three-hour drive for most of the trans population of the six New England States.

If you can get there, I hope you will make an effort to get there. You will go away with a sense of pride and will help advance the civil rights of the trans folk throughout the USA.