Shoes for a Desert Island Getaway (or Motel Escape)

By Brenda

In conversation with a new sister (Jennifer), who is very eager to go from first steps to a lot of JJ steps very quickly, I was asked what shoes should one buy and how do you go out and buy them as a male?

First, I was curious as to when she wore heels for the first time and she replied it was not that long ago and was there anything that she preferred. She indicated that several of her coworkers wore black pumps with a mid-heel and I like to be dressed as a secretary. I wore my mother’s friend’s high heeled stilettos every time they came over to gossip, but my mother never really wore pumps (she preferred sandals). I was surprised that shoes did not play a big role in Jennifer’s life before now.

Femulators are like regular people except that they also enjoy to wear woman’s shoes especially when they are out and about. High heels can also be considered a fetish object, but to us women, it’s something a smart girl loves to wear. Femininity can be defined by the right choice of shoe and can express your fashion sense very quickly. Once your foot has entered into the shoe, the brain already starts shifting quickly into feminine mode.

Along with the confidence boost that comes with more height, you might feel more positive about the way you look physically when wearing heels. High heels slightly alter the proportions of the body, lengthening the silhouette, accentuating calf muscles and making a person appear slimmer. Try different heel sizes and watch yourself in the mirror as your body reacts to the heel height. Shoes are very personal and I observe with a sharp eye what others are wearing or what style they enjoy the most. 

Shoes can quickly be an obsession and soon one is searching for storage solutions to accommodate them all.

I shopped at Payless as they offered low prices, had many styles in my size available (they stocked 10, 11, 12 and sometimes 13) and at times, I would be able to quickly try them on due to the store layout. They were everywhere and an affordable way to shop. You could be a real diva and buy Christian Siriano as the designer brand. I adore a pair of flower print pumps that are not just super comfortable, but look fantastic with a blue dress that I found in a thrift shop. In fact, in Stana’s sidebar photos, I spotted several pairs of Payless shoes that we both own 

I will say that I prefer quality brand names as they are more comfortable, made of leather and usually are stylish. There are lots of cheap overseas brands and some are better than others when it comes to quality. If you ask an airline flight attendant, she may mention Clarks, Naturalizer and Dream Pairs (Amazon) as go-to brands. 

It’s very easy to just ask, “My wife spends a lot of time on her feet and she is very fashionable like you and has an elegant style her friends say. I am sure she would adore a pair of shoes like yours and may I ask where you got them?” Seems to work very well. 

One time the attendant told me they were not for sale and I repeated my story. She apologized explaining that she gets asked a lot about selling her shoes and honestly if she asked for $200, they will still buy her shoes” 

I laughed and replied, “Honestly, I would give you $200 for the flight attendant outfit instead and let my wife buy her own shoes. (I need to ask Norah and Paula G about their flight attendant look). 

The low-heel Mary Jane is ideal for the aisle and the classic pump is your pair for walks across jet bridges and airport terminals on the way to the shuttle bus. Maybe, a quick stop to swap out for Mary Janes when the calfs start burning and the toe-pinching is unbearable (a good sign your shoes aren’t fitting right).

How to Shop

Online, use the size guide and feedback comments (shoe fits true to size or very narrow) to double-check, saving the headache of returns. 

In store en homme, find a pair in your size, check to make sure they are W (Wide), pay and try them on in your car and if they don’t fit right, return those 30 minutes later after a coffee break.

You can show a picture to the saleswoman and calmly say, “I have been told to buy these for my daughter’s birthday. Can you help?” If she replies something about domination or sissy role play, just explain that your daughter’s birthday is coming up and my wife says she would love these shoes for a wedding event and can I pick them up for her.

“I am crossdresser, not a transvestite and I will try these on when you are not looking”

The other trick is to have a pair of men’s pants and shirt to try on and in the cart is a dress and shoes. When you go into the change room, bring all four items, but check if you have a half door exposing your feet to others. 

I was en femme and popped into a thrift shop about 30 minutes before closing and it was not busy at all. I tried on four pairs of heels, two dresses and a business suit. I realized afterwards that the bottom third of the door was open to view, but it appears no one noticed. I stuffed a bag for $10 and couldn’t wait to get back to the hotel to try everything on. I even found a handful pantyhose to put in the bag. 

In-Store en femme, no problem. Enjoy your two hours of shoe shopping and fitting and don’t forget to keep the free nylon socks. Feel free to ask the sales help for suggestions.

For Sale Ads: If you wish to make friends with others that are in purge mode then go to it but be careful about your privacy and security. Apparently, women are finding creeps with a shoe fetish and even a foot fetish buying on Craigslist or Kijiji. I saw one ad saying “Male Crossdresser with too many shoes for sale SZ 12 and 13 and come try them out and have a chat”. It would be funny to go and find out it’s your Boss trying to raise a few bucks for Louboutins.

Thrift shops do a brisk business in shoes and with careful observation and some luck you will be rewarded with stylish fashion brands at low cost. I have noticed larger size shoes are priced higher than a size 9 for example. They know that its men who buy these shoes and Kate Winslet (Size 11), Beth Stern (Size 12). I have found Nine West, Michael Kors, Jessica Simpson and other designer shoes over time in my size. If the shoe doesn’t fit, return or donate it back to the charity group.

Packing for a desert island getaway sounds like a fun adventure! Here are some stylish high heel options that will keep you looking fabulous.

Classic Black Pumps

Classic black pumps are a timeless choice that adds a polished look to any outfit. They are versatile and can be worn with various styles, making them a wardrobe staple. Opt for a closed-toe, full-back style with a heel high enough to help loosen up your hips as you walk

A timeless choice that adds elegance to any outfit. Perfect for evening wear or formal occasions but is also a secretary worker staple. The key word is a style that has endured for years. The normal height is 3 inches with lower kitten heels an option. The stiletto skyscrapers are for indoor play due to their lower walkability rating.

Nine West has offered classic heels ideal for the office girl and for the party girl for after work drinks. The Jessica Simpson brand goes up to size 12, Choose a sexy pointy toe or a rounder more comfortable one for comfort. Click here for one that has a heel ideal for spending hours at the mall.

Nude Heels

Versatile and flattering, nude heels can be paired with almost any outfit. They also make your legs look longer. Heels affect not just your posture, but also the overall “look.” Chunky heels make walking so much more comfortable. Click here for an example.

D'Orsay Pumps

D'Orsay pumps are elegant and chic with the sides cut away to reveal the arch of the foot. This style is perfect for showing off shapely legs and adds a touch of sophistication to any outfit. They are a great choice for enhancing your feminine image. Click here for an example.

Wedges and Platforms

Ideal for mastering walking in heels, wedges provide more stability and comfort while still looking stylish. These work well with higher heights especialLy with the platform.  Click here for an example.

Tall Boots

Knee-high boots are sexy and sassy, perfect for adding a bold statement to your outfits. It pairs well with a short (check for stamp of approval) or long skirt and ideal for jeans. Click here for an example.

Ballet Flats

Ballet flats are perfect for those who prefer comfort without sacrificing femininity. They are especially great if you're taller or want a stylish look without the discomfort of high heels. Ballet flats come in various designs and colors making them a versatile addition to your shoe collection

Every girl keeps a pair in their handbag as high heels can sometimes get tiresome. Every woman goes thought this in life and the only cure is to take a break and wear flats. There are even pocket foldable flats that are more after party cab shoes than daily wear. 

Ask an airline stewardess for the comfy brands as they enjoy comfort and style and they may give you this link.

These styles will ensure you have both comfort and fashion covered during your desert island getaway. Which pairs are you most excited to pack?

If you can only have one pair maybe, the Mary Jane offers comfort, height and curb appeal.

I would add these (click here) for a week of fantasia instead of the boots because slingbacks are pretty hot right now in a lower heel and every girl needs an animal print at one point in their life.

High heels make me look taller and more proportioned. I also wear skirts or dresses and they usually look better with heels. I have great legs that look their best in heels. I feel confident walking in them and definitely have more of a presence. I just feel so feminine and myself in heels.

Also high heels are just gorgeous on their own. I have dozens of pairs and love picking the ones to go with my outfit. Mary Janes? T-straps? D'Orsay pumps? Oxford heels? Oh, my gosh, they're all so good. If I could only bring one pair that covers comfort, walkability, style and sexiness then it would be this shoe (click here) and it’s no wonder it’s sold out. 

Shoes, shoes, shoes, so many choices and so much fun!

Sidebar

Pumps are a classic and elegant shoe that can elevate any outfit. It is the staple of every femulators wardrobe. Here are a few tips for choosing the perfect pair:

Heel Height: Choose a heel height that you feel comfortable walking in. If you're new to wearing heels, start with a lower heel and gradually work your way up.

Fit: Make sure the pumps fit well. They should be snug, but not too tight and there should be no pinching or rubbing. Try on shoes later in the day as feet swell. Use online size guides to double-check fit.

Material: Opt for high-quality materials like leather or suede for durability and comfort.

Style: Consider the occasion and your outfit. Classic black pumps are versatile, but you can also experiment with different colors and designs.

Take advantage of BOGO sales: many retailers offer deals all the time as shoe styles change every season.

Wearing Elágia

Mark-Paul Gosselaar femulating on television’s Saved by the Bell.

They are real and they are mine!

I started developing female-like breasts during puberty (coincidentally, at about the same time I started crossdressing). When I crossdressed in my teen years, I would wear my mother’s bras (my sister’s were too small for me) and my breasts were ample enough to almost fill out her 38B cross-your-hearts.

I never went to a doctor regarding my girly breasts, so I may or may not have gynecomastia, but having seen photos of guys diagnosed with gynecomastia, I would say that my breasts are in the running.

My girly breasts caused me much consternation when I was young. I was ashamed of my breasts and shunned activities that involved baring them because I feared that people would ridicule me. My fears were justified and I was ridiculed. Some of my tormentors even went so far as to suggest I should wear a bra. One college dorm mate even offered me one of the bras that his girlfriend had left behind in his dorm room. (Thanks, Jim, but I her bra was too small.)

My parents never mentioned my breasts, but they did buy me weights and barbells so I could work out and shed my “baby fat.” I did work out and developed some muscles (mainly in my arms), but my breasts did not go away.

As a crossdresser, I learned to appreciate my girly breasts.

Like I wrote above, my breasts are large enough to almost fill out a 38B bra. Also, they are large enough that I can create cleavage very easily when the neckline of the apparel I am wearing calls for it. Imagine how big they would have been if I took hormones! More than once, trans acquaintances asked me if I was taking hormones when they saw me in a revealing top.

When I first started going out en femme, I used breast forms all the time, but now I don’t bother. Not only do I prefer the feel of my real breasts resting in the cups of my bra, but now I am proud that I have girly breasts and am not afraid to show them. Admittedly, my breasts are small for a woman my size, but they are real and they are mine!

Wearing Ann Taylor

Jim Bailey femulating on a 1984 episode of television’s Night Court.

Stuff 71: Girl Card

By J.J. Atwell

Do CDs have a “Girl Card”?

As guys, we’ve probably all had occasion for joking with other guys about turning in their “Man Card.” You know, your buddy just ordered a fancy drink at the bar rather than a beer or straight booze and somebody says, “Turn in your man card.” Is there a similar concept for CDs? Would it be a CD Card or a Girl Card?

I Think So

There are things that we do as CDs that we can similarly joke with other CDs about. For example, if you have less than 10 pairs of heels, you probably should turn in your CD Card. I can think of several other measures. Like if you have more men’s beauty products than women’s cosmetics. More men’s dress shirts than women’s sparkly tops. More bras than your SO. 

This Is a Joke

OK, at this point some of you are getting upset. You may be thinking that I’m making fun of you or CDs, as a whole. It’s not personal folks. I like to see humor in everything and my sense of humor is quirky. Sometimes my mind has a mind of its own.

I think it’s good to make fun of ourselves from time-to-time and not take things too serious. In the meantime, I might spend some effort trying to design a CD Card to hand out to my friends. And demand it back when they do something guy-ish. 

I’ll Be Back

I’ll be back with more Stuff for sure. Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Mac Duggal

Artur Chamski femulates Helena Vondranckova on Polish television’s Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo (Your Face Sounds Familiar). Click here to view this femulation on YouTube.

Happy Mother's Day!

(I have told this story here on past Mother’s Days, so you may have read it before and I apologize for the rerun. But just like the reruns on television, some are worth repeating.)

Mom was the most influential person in my life and influenced my penchant for crossdressing in a number of ways.

She was beautiful and did not need makeup. Lipstick, powder and rouge were all she ever used. I know because I enjoyed watching her put on her minimal makeup.

She always dressed like a fashionable lady and that was difficult to accomplish because money was tight when I was a kid. As a result, Mom sewed her own clothes, as well as clothes for my sister.

I was jealous of my sister and wished that Mom would sew something for me, but there were few sewing patterns for boys’ clothing. However, I would have been perfectly happy if she sewed a pretty dress for me like she did for my sister.

My Dad was a great guy, but he was not around much when I was growing up. He worked all the overtime he could get to make ends meet. For a few years, he also had a second job.

I can remember way back to my earliest memories when I actually thought that my father was a visitor because his appearances at home during my waking hours were so rare. So, during my formative years, Dad was at work, while my Mom was at home raising my sister and me.

Since I was raised in an environment where the father figure was absent most of the time, it is no wonder that I tended to follow in the footsteps of the only parental figure available to me, my Mom. As a result, I admired her and wanted to do the things she did. I did not know it at the time, but she was my role model.

I was a creative kid and Mom encouraged my creative side. I loved sports, especially baseball, but I was not very good at it (I could hit the ball a mile, but I threw “like a girl”). So early on, I knew my strengths.

I spent a lot of time writing and drawing and my mother supported and encouraged me. Eventually, I became a successful professional writer with a lot of thanks going to Mom.

I looked like my Mom’s side of the family and inherited many of her features like her long legs and her facial features. When I do my makeup just so, I look a lot like her; people would mistake us for mother and daughter, i.e., if she were alive and I dressed en femme in her presence.

Besides influencing my creative side, she also influenced my penchant for being feminine.

Mom often commented that because I had such nice legs, I should have been a girl. If she had made that comment once, I probably would have forgotten about it, but it seemed that she made that comment whenever she saw my legs bare. Don’t you think that may have influenced me?

She also made comments about the way I walked. She said I “tippy-toed,” i.e., I walked on my toes. I assumed from her comments that tippy-toeing was not the correct way for a male to walk, but I did not know how to walk any other way. She never showed me how I was supposed to walk, so I just kept on tippy-toeing.

I don't tippy-toe any longer. As I grew older, I must have figured out how to walk like a male. However, all my early years tippy-toeing may have facilitated my walking in high heels because ever since I slipped on my first pair of pumps, I never had a problem walking in heels.

I did not think that Mom knew about my crossdressing, because she never broached the subject despite the fact that I often got into her stuff and even ruined some items that I found out the hard way, were too small for me. I was very much in the closet then and I was just as happy that she did not know. But, she knew.

As newlyweds, my wife and I crossdressed for a Halloween party and when I mentioned our party plans to Mom over the phone, she asked if I had taken my box of “stuff” with me when I moved out.

I don't recall my response, but at that moment, I knew she knew. She never mentioned it again and neither did I.

However, once in awhile right up to her death, she would ask me, “Is there anything you want to tell me?”

I always thought she was referring to my crossdressing when she asked and I always said, “No.”

In retrospect, I wish I had confided in Mom about me becoming a woman. She was so loving and so supportive that I think she would have helped me. (She was a great seamstress by the way and I can only dream about the outfits she might have sewn for her male daughter.) But, I did not confide in her and I regret it now.

But, if there is a heaven, I am sure Mom smiles down on me when she sees her firstborn dressed en femme enjoying her time as a woman.

So, Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

Your Loving Daughter,

Stana

In a Fashion

Marilyn

I received some positive comments regarding my “Stana as Marilyn” photo posted here last Friday. And the commenters wanted to know more about the circumstances of the photo.

Well, at the time that the photo was taken, that’s how I went out dressed among the civilians. Needless to say, I received a lot of attention whenever I went out!

Only kidding! 

Actually, I dressed as Marilyn Monroe for my support group’s Halloween party in October 2001. The photo was taken in the hall where my support group normally met. The dress, shoes and gloves were eBay finds, while the belt and wig were Kmart purchases. (I used to buy a lot of dresses on eBay, but finally swore off eBay because I found that half the time, the published sizes were inaccurate and stuff that should have fit according to the published sizes, did not fit.)

To tell you the truth, that Halloween party was so long ago that I don’t recall anything about it except what I wore. 

One commenter wanted more information about my Marilyn’s bust, but I am unsure about how I achieved it. Most likely, I used surgical tape to squeeze my natural B-cup breasts together to create cleavage and used my homemade birdseed falsies to fill out the parts of my bra cups that were emptied due to my squeezed breasts.

And that’s the whole story (as much of it as I can remember).

Wearing Ann Taylor

Alex Nole at the 2025 Met Gala

The 2025 Met Gala was Monday night and photos of the event appeared all over the internet Tuesday morning. For example, Glamour had 102 photos of the girls and boys strutting their stuff.

What a clown show! I would not be caught dead wearing most of the stuff that was on display. I won’t mention specific people who dressed like clowns (the list would be too long). However, I will mention Alex Newell, who did us femulators proud. Alex is always a class act and did not let us down Monday night.

Why I Keep Buying Shoes I Rarely Wear

By Monika Kowalska

I have a deep and enduring love for shoes. Over the years, I’ve collected pairs for every mood, every season and every possible occasion, many of which, to be honest, rarely occur. Some shoes I’ve worn once. Others, not at all. And yet, I keep them, not out of neglect or indecision, but because they represent something more than utility.

This passion isn’t unique to me. Many women find themselves drawn to shoes in a way that goes beyond practicality. The collection may seem excessive from the outside, but there are valid and meaningful reasons behind it. Much like some men collect tools, buying equipment that may never be used, but still has value in its potential, shoes offer a similar sense of readiness, satisfaction and aesthetic enjoyment. 

And yes, we get questioned for it. But interestingly, no one seems to ask why some men collect toolboxes full of gadgets they’ll never use. It’s understood that those tools have practical value, even if they sit idle. In the same way, our shoes matter too.

Some are about fashion. Styles evolve constantly and shoes are often one of the easiest ways to adapt to a trend without overhauling your entire wardrobe. A bold heel or a fresh pair of boots can instantly update a simple outfit, turning something ordinary into something memorable. 

For many of us, shoes are a form of creative expression, a way to play with color, shape and attitude. A pair might be worn once and never again, but that doesn’t make it a mistake. It served a purpose in that particular moment. Maybe it helped us feel bold at a party where we were nervous to go alone or pulled an outfit together just right for a first date or an important interview. It gave us a boost of confidence, a little lift, sometimes literally, sometimes emotionally. And that alone is enough. Because fashion isn’t always about practicality. Sometimes it’s about feeling powerful, beautiful or simply in tune with who we are that day.

Sometimes we buy shoes for specific occasions, a wedding, a formal work event, a holiday trip or even a themed party that calls for something a little out of the ordinary. These aren’t everyday pairs. They’re the ones that live quietly in their boxes or on a high shelf, waiting for the moment they’re needed. Maybe it’s a pair of elegant heels you chose to match a dress you’ll only wear once or glittery sandals perfect for a summer evening abroad. They may not be practical in the day-to-day sense, but they serve a very real purpose: they help us rise to the occasion. They remind us that life isn’t just about routines, it’s about moments. And when those moments come, we want to show up feeling prepared, polished and a little bit magical. Those shoes might not get much wear, but they’re part of memories we carry for years.

Sales play their part, too. There’s something undeniably tempting about seeing a beautiful pair of shoes, ones that might have felt out of reach, suddenly within arm’s length thanks to a generous markdown. It's more than just a deal; it's a little thrill, a small victory. Even if we don’t need them right now, we imagine a time when we might. Maybe it’s that future dinner date we haven’t been invited to yet or a season that hasn’t come around again. We picture ourselves stepping into a moment that hasn’t happened, already dressed for it in our minds. That quiet little spark of future possibility is reason enough. Buying those shoes isn’t just about saving money, it’s about hope, preparation and allowing ourselves something lovely, just because. And sometimes, treating ourselves without justification is the most radical kind of self-care.

For some, shopping, especially for shoes, can even be deeply therapeutic. It’s not just about the item itself, but about the experience: the deliberate choice, the indulgence in beauty, the affirmation of personal taste. In a world that often asks women to shrink, to compromise or to put everyone else’s needs before their own, buying something just because it brings you joy can feel like a quiet, powerful act of rebellion. It’s a way of saying, I matter too. 

And for transgender women, that meaning can run even deeper. Shoes can be more than accessories, they can be milestones. The first pair of heels, the first pair of flats that felt right, the boots that made you stand taller, literally and figuratively. Every new pair can be a celebration of identity, a small but significant marker of a journey that hasn’t always been easy. In those moments, shoes aren’t just purchases. They’re affirmations. They’re evidence that we are becoming who we were always meant to be.

So yes, I own shoes I may never wear. But each one earned its place. Each one tells a story. And if others can collect screwdrivers or socket sets for a hypothetical future, surely I can keep a few pairs of strappy sandals for the same reason.

After all, I don’t ask anyone to explain their toolbox. Don’t ask me to explain my heels.

Monika has been interviewing trans people in her blog, The Heroines of My Life, since 2013. Click here to see who she has interviewed lately.

Wearing Nine West

Jiang Du femulating in the 2016 Chinese film Mr High Heels.

Diamonds are a Girl’s Best Friend! Part 2

By Norah Blucher

So when we last parted, I had just completely lost my mind and decided that I would ski en femme, had never tried it and did not even know anyone who had. I had nevertheless made up my mind to do it.

Look Out Michaela Schiffrin!

Okay, so I’m most definitely NOT Michaela Schiffrin. I will never be as gorgeous as her, nor will I ever achieve her level of skill in a million years. Nevertheless, I am still a rather competent skier. I’m a bit slow and not out to race anyone, but can hold my own on steep slopes, bump fields or through glades of trees.

Now my ski mate has met Norah, but I had never let on that she was about to become a ski bunny. My original plan was to show up one day and find him on the slopes, but he was unable to make it that day and I was all alone, but that worked out for the best. It actually took a few runs to get the hang of everything.

Before long however I was zipping around and having a grand time. I checked a few times and my makeup was holding up well and no one acted like anything was amiss with me at all. Just another girl out on the slopes. 

I had been texting with my ski mate that day and he noted that it sounded like I was having a fun day. Not being able to contain it any longer, I noted that Norah always has a great time. He seemed a bit confused and asked “Norah skis?????”

This is what I sent to my ski mate, LOL

And that was just my first day. With the season at a close, I racked up 17 days of skiing in various places, 11 of those as Norah! It has absolutely been one of the most bloody amazing experiences and in many ways, has added a side to Norah that I never could have imagined and it has also been a learning experience for sure.

Winter Can Be Rough

I was absolutely amazed how well my makeup has held up on multiple trips, but I’ve also discovered that though the bottle may say “Infallible” or “Long Wear,” it clearly has limits. I’ve noted limited transfer to goggles or masks, but one particularly bad day had me skiing down slopes into gale force winds with a lot of snow blowing up. Needless to say, it quite literally sand-blasted the makeup off of my exposed nose and one cheek.

If it happens to me, it is happening to other girls, too, and all that is needed is a little extra to touch up at the end of the day. It happens to us all and no ski girl is going to look at you funny if your makeup is a bit off.

Warmer Than Usual

We all seem to notice being warmer en femme and skiing is no different. For me, it is partly to do with the fact that Norah now has much better and newer kit than the male she sometimes impersonates, but the padding helps, too. A silicone bum pad means you do not get a cold bum on the chair lift!

En femme I actually wear less layers, even when it is right frigid out and completely enjoy this.

Passing is Easy!

Did I just say that? Passing? Easy? Yes I certainly did! Despite what you see in movies, few women are rocking skin tight ski wear. A woolly layer or two, ski pants, a jacket, helmet, goggles, not a lot is exposed. Even with goggles off, just your face shows. Combine that with my plait or pony tail hanging down my back or over my shoulder and no one really notices anything. Well, except maybe for the times I’ve encountered “admirers.”

Yes, I guess that lone middleaged females are not predominate on ski hills. That and the fact that I go into glades and un-groomed areas. This apparently adds a hotness factor in some blokes’ eyes and has made for some interesting and funny experiences.

On one day a group of three (two blokes and a girl) came from behind me and my male ski mate as we made our way down a bumpy glade. The girl and one bloke passed us, but the other came right up next to me and stopped. I waved him ahead and he waved me on instead. I went ahead a ways and stopped and he was right there next to me again!

Now my male ski mate was just a bit ahead of me, saw what was happening and the dirty bugger took off and left me! I guess I don’t blame him. We’re not a couple for sure and he wanted no part of this.

After the third time this bloke stopped next to me, I figured he was not getting the hint. I made my way to the side of the trail and told him to go on and he just waved me on. He clearly wanted my attention and I did think it was a bit sweet in a way, but I’m not into men and this was getting rather annoying. I gave him a stern look, pointed at him, then pointed down the trail and he finally got the hint and took off.

At the bottom of the trail, his two mates were waiting with mine and when he got to them, they asked what took so long and he made a lame excuse about a lady up the trail having trouble and he wanted to make sure she was okay. My male mate finally spoke up and said that she was fine and they took off.

Another time I was on my own going down a rather burned-out trail. Cover was getting thin and I had to make my way around a right many bare patches and stumps, but I love these challenging trails.

Near the end, a bloke passed me without much fanfare and a few minutes later, at the bottom, near the connector trail, I noted him waiting, watching me and also looking up the hill. As I passed by he gave me a big smile, waved and said “nice job!”

I turned around as I passed him and noted he was apparently waiting for a little toddler size human 300 meters or so up the trail, making their way down. Now I do not pretend to know his intentions, nor do I want to assume, but I just shook my head and carried on as it seemed to me like he had left this child behind to get a better look at me!

I did sort of look cute that day. Maybe I would have followed me too, LOL.

There was even one day, late in the afternoon that things were rather quiet. On a busy day, they will pair you up with groups of strangers so as not to send an empty chair up, but on a slow day, you can ride alone for all they care, which is often the case for me. It, therefore, was a bit of a surprise to me when only me and another cheeky bloke were approaching the chair lift and he asked if he could ride up with me! I said yes and he was very polite and chatty on the ride up.

All said though, no one gave me any trouble and these type of events are affirming in a way. I have noted a more friendly attitude of other women towards me as well. I’ve noted other females being a bit more chatty on a lift or much less hesitant to ask directions if they are not familiar with an area. Even with my helmet and jacket off,in the various pubs and restaurants that dot ski hills, I’ve had females sitting next to me ask about my food, compliment my nails and what not. 

The Odd Couple

As femulators, we often seem to sometimes have female friends, but I do not note many stories from others about being with male mates while en femme and I must say it is an interesting experience for sure.

Once when we had not been on a hill for long, we came upon a group of male snowboarders. We stopped next to them and my mate asked what trails were good. Skiers are a right friendly bunch and we chatted a bit. Then they asked where we were from. As two males, we are often asked in such situations where each of us is from, but in this case, they just asked my male mate where “we” were from, assuming us to be a couple. I also noted that as a lone female, males would talk to me more. When accompanied by my male ski mate, blokes might say hi to me, but will predominantly talk to my male mate.

I am indeed very fortunate to have such a mate as we had a good laugh about this later. We are not sure if they read me and probably did not we assume, but either way, he cares little what others think. We have been mates a long time. I’m very happy out as Norah, and that is all that matters to him. I am lucky to have such a mate indeed... even if he did ditch me with that other bloke, LOL.

In many ways though, I’ve gotten really great feedback in these situations I could not normally get. So often we are guessing if we pass, but skiing with my mate, I have actually confirmed I have passed to many.

My mate is rather well known on a few hills. As male, I’m less well recognized alone, but if we were together as males, I would instantly be familiar.

Now, after seeing my mate for years with only other males and some knowing he has a longtime lady in his life, his sudden appearance with a strange blonde has attracted some attention in his life. I’ve been asked about, but no one recognized me as my male self. In most cases, if they were told the truth (we’ve let a few know), they were genuinely surprised to learn I was male, even after having conversations with them!

I think the best comment ever was when my ski mate was chatting with one such person a few days after meeting Norah. The other bloke was told the truth and he was floored and commented something to the effect of “I was killing it as a trans girl.” I’ve received many compliments before, but this is one of my favorites.

Après Life

After a day of skiing, many enjoy a bit of time socializing and it too has been a wonderful experience en femme. This was not something male me did much of, but even after a long cold day, I feel much more energy en femme and am a much more social creature as Norah.

I’d long envied how many women will remove their damp ski pants after a day on the slopes and put on a type of quilted skirt over their leggings. I purchased one and find it to be heaven on earth to roam the lodge with my furry boots. You didn’t think skirts were going to be involved in skiing did you? I’ve actually worn this out and about town and into stores on my long drives home as well. They are such a cute way to wear leggings, provide a bit of extra warmth and also give a bit of extra coverage we need that prevents many of us from wearing leggings.

Anyway, some hills still operate the lodge as a restaurant and bar after the lifts close and some even provide entertainment or have outdoor bonfires and dance parties and I’ve enjoyed it all with much delight. I’m not sure if it is a good sign or means I stand out, but one place even knows Norah by name after a few visits and fondly greets her upon entry!

At one time, I noted an auction was occurring at the end of the day and promptly registered. Most items were bidding too rich for my blood, but I did not go home empty-handed and went away with a pair of handmade earrings I was highest bidder on. 

A Deal Too Good to Resist

I had been feeling for a while that the first pair of skis I had bought a few years ago did not truly fit my style if skiing and was contemplating a new pair. As the end of the season approached, I noted some smashing sales of 50% off and could not resist. I went into the ski store at the lodge and a friendly girl greeted me and asked what I was looking for. After a few questions, she took me over to a rack of women’s skis to show me her recommendations. 

She noted that her girls who like racing preferred one particular pair, but the more recreational girls liked a different pair and found them to be light and lively and could handle almost anything. I took this all in and needed some time to consider, but returned the next week and followed up on her recommendation. After another girl at the sales counter helped me pick out matching bindings. I headed out an hour later with my new skis.

And yes, clothing was going on sale, too, so I bought a more colorful and un-insulated jacket for spring, LOL.

I ran into the ski store lady a few times that weekend and again on another trip and she always excitedly asked how everything was working out. After the third or fourth time, she asked, I gave her a big hug and told her they were the most fabulous skis I had ever used yet and meant it. I think this made her day.

So Many Lessons Learned

I had not known what to expect when I started all this. I really just thought I’d ski as a girl and not much else beyond that I guess, but I got so much more than I expected.

I’ve been out a lot and sometimes to the same place a time or two, but never to this level. As I repeatedly returned to familiar places, I discovered that Norah was becoming an accepted and welcome visitor. The ski hill staff, hotels and inns, even some off hill restaurants remembered me and welcomed me back. There was definitely a warmer friendliness among other females, but with blokes as well. At one place, with my male ski mate, he noted to me that one particular barkeep used a different tone when speaking to females and did so to me as well. He might not have even realized he did this and it was not creepy or anything, just a subtle softening of his voice and being a little less blunt with his words around women.

And not just staff at places you pay to stay or eat either. At other times, if there was an event going on or something, I noted that if I stopped to watch, other females would approach me to chat. I cannot be certain if I was ever read or not, but I never noted anyone changing their stance toward me either. Once I was brought into the group, whether I was read or not, no one ever made an effort to shoo me away either. I was just accepted as one of the girls.

And I do not suspect this was just out of politeness either. As I became known as a regular, women seemed to take notice of me and become more chatty after repeated visits. I even ran into one such woman at a ski lodge store and after recognizing each other and catching up a few minutes, we helped each other pick out socks, LOL.

This was all a level of immersion into the world of women I had not expected and certainly not on ski slopes of all places, but it was eye opening and felt rather wonderful. We often go out and interact with the world, but it is much less common for many of us that we get to truly see our femme personality blossom and discover the woman we have always wanted to be and have it so readily accepted by others. It becomes less about going out and more about living life. It has made me ponder a lot too.

As people, we often bond with others over common interests. I’ve had good experiences at stores, eating out, etc, but we all do that as people. They are life necessities in many regards. Doing something you like around others who like it too creates much more opportunity for connections over these shared interests. I’m not sure what will come next for me, but it has made me think right hard about other paths I can head down in my femme life that I might have never felt possible before.

Hanging Up My Skis for Now

So loves, quite a lot here, but I wanted to finish out the ski season to see how it all worked out before sharing with you all. I hope I did not disappoint and am now anxiously awaiting what next season will bring!

As always, questions and comments are welcome below or you can email me at nblucher at-sign proton dot me. I’d love to hear about some not so common things you may have done en femme and I think everyone else would, too!

Wearing Elágia

John Hurt femulating in the 1975 British film The Naked Civil Servant.