My Magic Skirt

By Penny from Edinburgh

I have a magic skirt.

I found her in the wonderfully named Mary’s Living and Giving Shop, a boutique charity shop, a sort of thrift, in Stockbridge on the edge of Edinburgh’s historic New Town. As soon as I tried her on, I just knew that she was meant for me.

She’s a lined tartan pencil skirt in a pattern of shocking pink and mid-green on a black background. She sits perfectly just below the knee at the narrow point of my legs.

Part of her secret is that her three main colours: pink, green and black mean that she goes well with a wide variety of tops. I have had her on with, for example, a black crew neck cardigan, a green long sleeved T and a pink sleeveless polo neck top. She can be dressed up or down according to my mood or the occasion.

I don’t normally wear pencil skirts. Other profiles usually work better for me: A-line skirts give the illusion of a smaller waist, while mermaid or trumpet midi skirts give the impression of curves. However, my magic skirt makes my hips look bigger. I think that this is because being a tartan skirt, she is made with much thicker material, so she has body and doesn’t just hang limply.

Also, her style is smart and conservative, but is colourful, and suits Penny, my femme self, perfectly.

But her real magic is not in the fit, the style or the colours; it is that when I put her on she gives me that extra confidence. Wearing my magic skirt, whatever I do, wherever I go, I simply am Penny.

Wearing Boston Proper

Zack Powell and Rick Hammerly femulating on stage in The Legend of Georgia McBride.

Fire Sale

My mother-in-law used to say it looked like my wife went to a "fire sale" when she would purchase the same exact item of clothing in a variety of colors.

I am guilty of the same thing. When I find something that is just right, I will purchase more of the same figuring that the item may not be available in the future. That's how I ended up with four pairs of the same high heel pumps, two in black and two in nude. Or the same sets of bras and girdles, one pair in white and the other in black.

Previously, I mentioned the pencil skirt I bought at Macy's last month. I did not mention that it is figure-hugging and one of the few skirts I own that shows off my derreire.

I have no rear end! My wife has commented more than once about my flat dupa. But somehow, this pencil skirt manages to adjust what little I have to give me a shapely butt. I assume it is the result of the tightness of the skirt and the stretchiness of the skirt's scuba fabric.

I bought the skirt in a beautiful shade of blue (called "Lazulite") and regretted not buying it in other colors, too.

Last week, I noticed a pop-up ad from Macy's showing the skirt on sale. And if I bought two, shipping was free, so I sashayed as quick as a Playboy bunny to the Macy's website and ordered one in black and one in red.

I am my mother-in-law's daughter-in-law!

Wearing New York & Company (Source: New York & Company)

During a fundraiser for Alzheimer's research, Kennesaw, Georgia, Mayor Derek Easterling performed as Christina Aguilera and was highly criticized by the local transphobes and haters. (Thanks to Peggy Sue for the heads-up about this story.)