Like Mother, Like Daughter

Mom would have been 100 years old today. 

She raised my sister and I in the 1950s, while my Dad worked two jobs to finance our raising. With my male role model out of the picture (or out of focus) most of the time, Mom became my role model and as a result, instead of raising a son and a daughter, she raised two daughters.

The older daughter (me) was her favorite and received more attention; I was babied, pampered and spoiled, whereas my sister often had to fend for herself. As a result, growing up under Mom's tutelage, I turned out to be very feminine and learned to act like the lady she was.

A lot of us femulate our mothers to some degree. I, for one, favor styles that my mother would wear. 
For example, Mom loved high heels, always wore them when she went out and she owned a closet full. Like mother, like daughter, I love high heels, always wear them when I go out and I own a closet full, too.

I resemble my Mom’s side of the family, too, and I look just like her. (My sister recently remarked how much I resemble Mom. Interestingly, my sister has never seen me in girl mode and she was looking at a boy mode photo when she made that comment.) 

And my resemblance to Mom went beyond facial features. She had shapely legs. When she worked in an office before she married, her nickname was "Legs." Again like mother, like daughter, I inherited Mom's legs and a transman once dubbed me "Leggy.” 

I love being my mother's daughter and I guess I have become my mother in many ways.

Wearing Max Mara coat, Nanushka dress and Zimmermann booties

Professional femulator Pavel Arambula

Happy Father's Day

My father has been dead for over 30 years, but I think of him often. He was a great guy and I know he loved me, but I think he was a little uncomfortable around me because I was not a typical "boy" and because he saw me crossdressed for Halloween on a couple of occasions. On the other hand, when I crossdressed on Halloween, I remember my Dad warning me to be careful because other males might hit on me.

When my wife was pregnant, I hoped that our baby would be female because I feared that I might not be an adequate role model for a son. I was very relieved when a daughter showed up instead of a son. Turns out that my daughter has been very supportive of my transness; who knows if a son would have been the same.

As a father myself, I'd prefer to dress like a mother. Such is the paradoxical life of a transwoman on Father's Day.

Wearing BooHoo

📺 William Phipps (blonde in mink stole on the right) femulates in the 1951 film No Questions Asked.

What Father's Day Means To Trans Parents

This came over the mojo wire Friday morning:

When a person transitions from male to female and is a parent, how is Father’s Day celebrated? WEKU’s Cheri Lawson talked with three transgender women who are also parents.

You can listen and read all about it here.

Wearing Carolina Herrera

Kamil Bijos femulates Sylwia Grzeszczak on Polish television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.

Moms, Dads and Female Sons

When my Dad saw me dressed en femme for the first time (for Halloween), he gave me some fatherly advice: watch out for boys who might want to have their way with me.

I had a good relationship with my Dad. He did his best to raise my sister and I. Maybe he did not know what to do with his feminine son, so he did not interfere and let me find myself. He let my sister find herself, too, so I guess he thought that was the best way to raise girls.

On the other hand, Mom was very hands-on raising her kids. While my sister was independent and frustrated some of my Mom's attempts to raise her a certain way, I was a Momma's boy tied to her apron strings and she was able to mold me into the daughter she always wanted.

That's why she never complained about me wearing her clothes when I was home alone or why she did not throw away my stash of female finery that I had hidden in my room. She knew I wanted to be a girl and I so regret not confiding with her about it.

 

Actor Thomas Gorrebeeck femulating on stage in Compleat Female Stage Beauty (2011).

 

Wearing Tibi dress and Riley shoes.

Around the World in a Dress and a Skirt

"Since I am an adult, people should feel free to call me out on my decisions. In this case, if you do, I will confess that I don't particularly like wearing skirts or dresses. I'm like a soccer mom who doesn't love the sport -- but does love her kids. I couldn't care more about my boy being a happy, self-assured, compassionate person. I couldn't care less about the choices he makes on the way to becoming that person -- as long as they cause no harm to himself or others. The ability to make these choices is his birthright -- a right that I should help him to exercise, since I am responsible for his birth," wrote Nils Pickert, the father who wears a skirt to support his son.

Read the rest of his words on The Huffington Post.

Parenting

On Salon today, Mary Elizabeth Williams wrote about a mother's anti-homophobia rant that went viral. Her son's gender-bending Halloween costume outraged other parents -- so she penned an eloquent, moving response

As the blogger herself says it, "If he wants to carry a purse, or marry a man, or paint fingernails with his best girlfriend, then ok. My job as his mother is not to stifle that man that he will be, but to help him along his way. Mine is not to dictate what is 'normal' and what is not, but to help him become a good person." And if you want to raise a good man, sometimes you've got to give him the freedom to be an adorable girl.

Read the rest of the story here.