Saturday, December 21, 2024
Friday, December 20, 2024
Not One of the Guys
Attending Hamvention in 2012 was my third time doing it en femme, so I was still getting used to mixing with a crowd of civilians that was predominantly male.
Friday morning of Hamvention, I went to the hotel restaurant for breakfast. There I met another board member and his wife, who I had not seen since the previous Hamvention a year earlier, so we hugged and caught up on the past year.
While I was eating and chatting, I noticed a group of guys at the next table checking me out. Finally, one of the guys got up and came to our table, excused himself and asked me, “Did you ever live in Annapolis?”
“No, I've never been in Annapolis, why do you ask?”
“You look just like the sister of a friend of mine from Annapolis. Sorry to bother you.”
“No problem.”
That was an auspicious way to start the day!
That evening was my group’s annual banquet. Arriving at the banquet hall to get the show on the road, some attendees (about 20) were already in attendance, so we needed to collect their tickets. While another board member manned the entrance to collect tickets from new arrivals, I volunteered to collect tickets from those already in attendance. Almost all of them were strangers and it was a very telling experience.
Most of the board members (all guys) have known me for 10 years or more. They call me by my femme name most of the time, flub pronouns some of the time and still treat me “like one of the guys” all of the time.
So there I am en femme decked out in a dress and peep-toe slingback 4-inch heels (see photo) collecting tickets from 20 strangers – almost all of them were male and they most definitely did not treat me like “one of the guys.” Instead, they were very polite and respectful and some of them were actually very cute in the way they interacted with me. They also got the pronouns right. I don't think I ever felt more womanly than I did when I collected the tickets.
After that experience, I became more aware of how strangers interacted with me during Hamvention. In general, woman smiled that smile which indicates that they acknowledge you as a member of their club. And men were overly polite. It became obvious that they thought I was a woman and not one of the guys.
Wearing Venus |
Pretty Christine |
Thursday, December 19, 2024
The Gift
By Paula Gaikowski (paula.gaikowski@gmail.com)
This Christmas season, I’m excited to share a special story with you. “The Gift” is a tale about a young boy named Paul, who finds himself trapped in a small-town theater during a blizzard. As he explores the stage, he discovers a magical dress that sparks a transformative journey.
Inspired by the classic tale of Ebenezer Scrooge, Paul is visited by a series of extraordinary figures from history: Chevalier d'Éon, Christine Jorgensen and Marsha P. Johnson. Through these encounters, Paul begins to understand himself and the world around him in a new light.
I hope this story brings you joy, wonder and a deeper understanding of the power of self-discovery.
Click here to read “The Gift.”
Please share your impressions with me!
Happy Holidays!
Love, Paula G
Wearing Venus |
Bogdan Kibalyuk femulating in the Russian television series Policeman from YouTube (Politseyskiy s YouTyuba). |
Wednesday, December 18, 2024
The Power of Heels!
Tuesday, December 17, 2024
Gynecomastia
Monday, December 16, 2024
Stuff: Too Fat for My Skinny Jeans
Do You Like Skinny Jeans?
I find women’s skinny jeans to be a handy item of clothing when looking for something quick and easy to wear. I initially bought a pair of Gloria Vanderbilt Amanda jeans in size 12. They were comfortable and did a good job of disguising my hip/bum padding. Then I lost some weight and went down to a size 10. I felt great! With further effort I actually got down to a size 8.
But….
Yes, you know there is a but coming. I haven’t been very careful with my diet and exercise lately. The other night I was getting dressed to go to a group meeting and wanted to wear my black skinny jeans. They would have been the right, casual vibe for the venue. Well, once I had my shapewear on and tugged on the jeans, you guessed it, I couldn’t get them zipped. Frustrating.
Of course I didn’t keep the larger sizes, so I had to do a quick adjustment to some loose, light weight black slacks. That at least kept the outfit cohesive. But it serves as a good illustration of how different clothing sizes and fit are for men and women.
Women’s Clothing Is Body-Conscious
I think we all know that women’s clothing is designed to flatter and show off our curves. Unless you buy clothes that are cut loosely, the difference between two sizes can be small. That means that a small change in weight can quickly put you in the next size. I bet that’s why some women have what they call “fat clothes.” They can wear them when their weight goes up and down. I guess I’ll have to do the same thing. Or I can go back to being serious about watching my diet and getting exercise. What do you think? Do you have “fat” clothes?
I’ll Be Back
Hopefully, as a slimmer version of myself. I welcome comments and suggestions here on Stana’s page or by email at Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com.
Wearing Shein |
Veit Alex |
Sunday, December 15, 2024
Saturday, December 14, 2024
Friday, December 13, 2024
That's What She Said
Thursday, December 12, 2024
My Neighborhood
One thing leads to another on the Internet and I unintentionally came upon a website called Neighborhood Scout that provides “Custom Analytics to Invest, Appraise, or Finance Real Estate.” Naturally, I had to see what the website had to say about my neighborhood.
Most of what the report stated did not surprise me – stuff I already knew or suspected, but two items in the report surprised me.
According to the report, my neighborhood is “pretty special linguistically. Significantly, 9.5% of its residents five years old and above primarily speak Polish at home. While this may seem like a small percentage, it is higher than 97.9% of the neighborhoods in America.”
Since I am of Polish descent, this surprised me and struck home. Even though I was born and raised in the USA, my first language was Polish. I did not learn English until my parents brought home a television.
The other item of interest was that my neighborhood “has the amazing distinction of housing more same sex couples living together than 98.3% of neighborhoods in the U.S.”
There is a same sex couple living a few houses down the street from us (and we are on very friendly terms with them), but I was clueless that my neighborhood was competing with Provincetown! As a crossdresser, that fact makes me feel more comfortable about living where I live.
Wearing Shein |
Libor Landa femulating in the 2003 Czech film Kameňák. Click here to view this film on YouTube. |
Wednesday, December 11, 2024
Remembering Tapestry
By Paula Gaikowski (paula.gaikowski@gmail.com)
One of the greatest strengths of Femulate is the sense of community it’s created. For many of us, it’s a daily gathering place where we can check in with one another, offer support and share our experiences. It’s a space where we can be vulnerable, share our struggles and celebrate our successes. Just like any neighborhood, we may have our disagreements, but we also have a deep sense of camaraderie and look out for one another.
Being part of this community is like being at home. It’s a feeling of comfort, acceptance, and belonging. I often start my day by checking the blog and it’s always reassuring to know that I’m part of a space where I can be my authentic self. This blog has created a haven for us, a place where we can be ourselves without fear of judgment or rejection. That’s what makes it so special.
Back in the 1970’s and 80’s, being a transgender felt incredibly isolating. One of the few ways I felt connected to others like me was through media. I remember writing an article for Femulate about the 80’s talk shows that featured transgender women and crossdressers. Seeing myself represented on television, albeit in a limited and sometimes stereotypical way, gave me the sense that I wasn’t alone.
To find more information and connect with others, I would sometimes visit an adult bookstore in Passaic, New Jersey. This derelict place with its peeling paint, flickering lights and seedy clientele, exuded a sense of decay and despair. This was all that was available. I would buy magazines that catered to “transvestites,” which would feature articles and pictures of persons who had transitioned or crossdressed. Although I may not have known much about these individuals, seeing their faces and reading about their experiences gave me hope and a sense of connection.
One magazine stood out from the others: Tapestry, published by the International Foundation for Gender Education in Waltham, Massachusetts. While it covered important topics like transgender rights and transitioning in the workplace, what truly resonated with me was the personal ads section in the back. Trans cross-dressers and transgender women would share brief stories about themselves, creating a sense of intimacy and vulnerability.
The profiles I discovered were striking – professional women, dressed to impress, with high heels, makeup, pantyhose and dresses. They were the epitome of 1980’s office attire. But what struck me most was that they were living their lives in secret, hiding their true identities behind a veil of femininity. They didn’t identify as fetishists or seeking hookups. They were simply trying to connect with others like themselves. I want to know more about these persons if anyone knows, recognizes or is one of these persons please share. [Stana was one of those persons. - Ed.]
Using the term “transvestite” was the norm at the time and I remember seeing it in print. These individuals were hiding their true selves, often behind post office boxes or pseudonyms, due to the overwhelming taboo surrounding transgender identities. But what was clear from these profiles was that I wasn’t alone. There were others across the country, living similar lives, struggling with similar feelings of isolation and longing for connection.
Tapestry magazine was a lifeline for me, providing a platform for these individuals to share their stories and find community. I would eagerly look forward to each new issue, feeling a sense of connection to these strangers who had become like neighbors to me. Little did I know, the Internet was on the horizon, about to disrupt the lives of these individuals and others like me, eventually giving rise to Femulate, a haven for transgender persons to find sisterhood and community.
Wearing Paige |
Our Gang/Little Rascals ballet femulation (Top) Spanky (George McFarland) and Alfalfa (Carl Switzer) in a 1937 Our Gang comedy titled Rushin’ Ballet. (Bottom) Alfalfa (Bug Hall) and Spanky (Travis Tedford) in the 1994 film The Little Rascals. (Click here to view both femulations on YouTube.) |