"Tuesday" is Thursday's Title

What a lousy day! Overcast, occasional rain with the temperature hovering around 45 degrees, Tuesday was a very raw day especially considering we are one month into spring.

I planned and laid out my outfit for my day en femme ahead of time. I assumed the weather would be warmer, so my outfit featured a sleeveless collared dress that I purchased at Dress Barn.

I figured that my three-quarter-length sweater coat would fight off the inclement weather. So after I dressed I took the coat with me, put it in the passenger seat and drove to my first stop, the Westfield Mall in Meriden.

It was early and the mall had just opened, so I was able to get a parking space in the first slot next to the JCPenney entrance. I decided to forgo the coat for my tour of the mall because I knew from past experience that it would be too warm wearing the coat in the mall. Turned out that the temperature in the mall was just right for going coatless.

Last time I visited this mall was in the fall and things had gone downhill since then. Storefront after storefront were empty with no signs that replacement stores were in the works. It was depressing, but I did not let it ruin my shopping day.

First stop was Payless where I wanted to shop for casual spring/summer-styled shoes. My favorite Payless sales representative was holding down the fort. I have shopped for girl shoes in both boy and girl mode at three different Payless stores where I found her working. However, she seems to have stopped moving from store-to-store and I have run into her at the Meriden store the last few times I shopped there. Needless to say, she knows me as a customer who buys girl shoes in boy and girl mode and she recognized me as soon as I walked in the store.

Payless shoes sizes are all over the map, so I tried on sizes ranging from 10 to 13 in both regular and wide styles. I tried on approximately 15 pairs and narrowed those down to five pairs that fit, and finally to two pairs that I liked, one sized 11 and the other 11 Wide. Both pairs are white peep-toe wedges, one high (4-inch wedge) and the other low (1.5-inch wedge).

Payless was having one of their buy-one-get-a-second-pair-for-half-price sale, so I basically bought two pairs of shoes for the price of one and a half pairs.

Next, I wanted to shop for a pair of white shorts to go with my white wedges. I visited Torrid, Lane Bryant, Sears and Macy's without success. Either I did not like the styles they had for sale or they did not have my size in the style I liked.

Time was running out, so I headed back towards JCPenney where my chariot awaited me for my trip to do outreach in New Haven. By the time I got to JCPenney, I still had a few minutes before I had to hit the road, so I checked out JCPenney offerings.

I found a pair of shorts that were exactly what I wanted, but the way my luck was running, I assumed they would not fit and I almost hung them back on the rack without trying them on. But then I reconsidered, took them to the dressing room and was elated that they fit perfectly and looked great, too!I paid for the shorts, returned to my car and drove to Southern Connecticut State University in New Haven.

The rest of the story will appear here tomorrow.

 

Barney Rubble and Fred Flintstones femulating in television’s The Flintstones, circa 1963.

 

Wearing Donna Morgan.

Wednesday’s Real Life Experience

It was so cold on Wednesday! The temperature never reached 20 and the wind chill made it worse. (The wind chill on Mt. Washington was 
-85 degrees. Can you imagine?)

I dressed for the weather. I wore my purple knee-length, long-sleeved sweater dress, diamond-patterned tights, booties and white fake fur jacket.

I arrived at West Farms Mall shortly after it opened and went straight to Macy's to look for the "perfect dress" that I saw there a couple of weeks ago. I quickly found it in my size and took it to the fitting room along with two other dresses that looked lovely.

The perfect dress fit, but did not look perfect. The other two dresses were even less so. I decided to abandon Macy's and walked to JCPenney at the other end of the mall.

I found four dresses in the JCPenney racks that I took to the fitting room. One dress looked fabulous on me, but I could not zip it up all the way and sadly it was not available in a larger size.

Two of the other dresses were so small that I could not get them on at all. The fourth dress fit and I kind of liked the way it looked on me. But after considering it, I decided not to settle; I could do better. So I exited JCPenney and walked back to the Macy's end of the mall where my car awaited me.

Although I was dressed for the weather outdoors, I was way overdressed for the "weather" inside Macy's and JCPenney. It was uncomfortably warm in the stores. Shedding my fake fur jacket helped a little, but not enough and I was anxious to get out into the fresh air again. And as it was, time was of the essence --- it was time to meet my editor for lunch.

But before I get into that, you may wonder about my real life experience in the mall. I am so used to being out en femme that I don't even think about it, but the e-mails I receive indicate that some of you wonder about it.

Even though the mall had just opened, it was busy --- not Christmas season busy, but there was a lot of foot traffic, all adults because school was in session.

I usually avoid eye contact with males --- don't want to encourage them --- but I did eye catch a half dozen or so checking me out as I walked through the mall.

On the other hand, I watch females more closely to see how they react. Three or four smiled and said "Hello" as we passed each other in the mall. I noticed a few other females looking me over --- trying to figure me out I suppose.

No one, male or female, acted negatively to my presence. No one was outraged and no one laughed. I think most people just perceived me as another middle-aged woman in the mall, which works for me.

(To be continued)

My Favorite Thing

I went out en femme yesterday.

I wore the brown "draped brooch shift" dress and necklace that I bought at Dress Barn in June. I accessorized with my simulated snake skin bag and peep-toe slingback heels (see the first photo).

I learned something new yesterday: perfumes stain.

When I finished dressing, I dabbed on some Chanel Eau de Cologne No. 22. A couple of drops got away from me and landed on the hem of my dress. I assumed the drops would evaporate, so I didn't think anything of it.

Hours later, I noticed that the perfume drops had left stains on my dress. (I hope they come out in the wash.)

Dressed and out the door at 9:45 AM, my first stop was the Ann Taylor store in West Farms Mall in Farmington. I saw some attractive dresses on their website that I wanted to see in person.

Entering through Macy's, I walked through half the mall to get to Ann Taylor. On my way, a few women smiled and some said "Hello," a few guys looked my way, and no one pointed and shouted, "She's a man," so I felt confident about my femulation.

I entered Ann Taylor and a "saleswoman" greeted me and pointed out the racks of dresses that were on sale. (I put saleswoman in quotation marks because the two women working in Ann Taylor yesterday looked like high school kids to me. I realize they were not that young, but their ages were a lot closer to high school age than mine!)

The saleswoman loved my shoes, but admitted that shoes like mine hurt a lot. We discussed the perils of high heels, then she complimented my necklace. (Yesterday, I received a lot of compliments for my necklace.)

I noticed that all the dresses in the store topped out at size 14, whereas larger sizes are available online. Eyeballing the size 14s, they looked like ample size 14s, so I found three dresses to try on.

I managed to slip into all three dresses and close their zippers. The dresses were gorgeous and would look very nice on me if they were one size larger (or I was one size smaller). As is, they were just a little too tight, so I left Ann Taylor empty-handed and disappointed.

I decided to walk to the other end of the mall to JCPenney. They have a huge dress department and I almost always have shopping success there. I spent about an hour in JCPenney looking through the dress racks and trying on my finds.

During the hunt, I was very surprised to find the exact same Dress Barn dress I was wearing for sale. I had assumed incorrectly that Dress Barn and JCPenney did not sell the same lines of clothing, so I learned something new twice yesterday.

My hunt ended with two dresses making the final cut, a purple ruffle dress ("Flowing ruffles add a feminine flair to this sheath dress in a comfortable matte jersey") and a sleeveless black/teal color-block sheath ("Bold colorblock print adds a modern twist to this classic silhouette.").

Trying on a dress makes all the difference in the world when shopping. I knew the ruffle dress would look good on me assuming that it fit, whereas the color-block sheath was one of those dresses I was not sure about. I grabbed it as a "what-the-heck" pick since I was going to the dressing room to try on some other dresses anyway. Turned out it was one of the nicest dresses (on me) that I tried on yesterday. So, you never know.

I took my finds to the cashier and she asked if I wanted to use my JCPenney credit card.

I said I wanted to pay cash.

She asked if I had a JCPenney credit card.

I said I did, but have not used it in years.

She tried to convince me to sign up for a new credit card and get a 20% discount on all my purchases that day.

I knew I would have to show a photo identification to apply for a new card and I was a little reluctant to out myself whether or not the cashier had already figured me out. But the 20% discount was hard to resist, so I relented.

As I handed the saleswoman my driver's license, I commented that I looked a little different than when the license photo was taken.

She glanced at the license and then said something to the effect that my hairdo was now much bigger.

For a fleeting moment, I wondered if I had not outed myself afterall and that she thought that the license photo just showed me, a woman, with a short female hairdo. But there is a big letter "M" next to the "Sex:" on the license that is a dead giveaway.

I'll never know what she thought, but whatever the case, she was very pleasant, treated me politely throughout our encounter and that's alright by me.

After leaving the dress department, I passed the jewelry department and checked out the earring racks for those rare hard-to-find clip-ons. There were a handful and I found a retro style pair that I purchased with my new 20% off credit card.

A saleswoman rang up my purchase and mentioned that they were getting in some more clip-ons from Monet.

I told her I would be back and I am sure I will be.

My day out as a woman was going very well except for one thing: I felt lousier as the day progressed. By the time I exited JCPenney, I had an intense headache and was so tired that I could have taken a nap right on the spot.

I decided to call it a day if I did not feel any better by the time I walked the length of the mall back to Macy's where my chariot awaited me. I stopped briefly at a couple of stores along the way, but more or less made a bee-line to Macy's.

I did not feel any better, but I thought the fresh air might help. It was now raining, so I sprinted to my car as quickly as my high heels would permit me and regrouped.

It was hot and stuffy inside, so I turned on the ignition and cranked up the air conditioning. The AC did not help; I did not feel any better, so I decided to return from whence I came.

Upon my return, I took a short nap (I rarely nap during the day unless I am ill). I felt a little better afterword.

Before I returned to boy mode, I took some photos wearing my new dresses. (You can compare me with the models on the JCPenney website in the second and third photos. By the way, I did not cut off the model’s head --- JCPenney did it)

I was disappointed that it was a short day out en femme, but it was a day out en femme and that is a wonderful thing!

I highly recommend it to everyone.

Shopping Spree

(updated below)

I was out all day en femme yesterday.

I wore my Victoria's Secret kelly green sweater dress, Payless tan bootines, Kohl's animal print scarf, and Fashion Bug white fake fur jacket.

I hit the first mall (West Farms Mall) at 10:30 AM and headed straight to the dress department of JCPenney to search out the dress I saw on their website. I quickly found a rack of that very dress and there was one in my size. I also found two other dresses to take into the fitting room.

After I stripped down and prepared to try on my finds, I noticed that the dress that brought me to JCPenney in the first place had a huge brown stain near its hem. It looked as if someone had stepped on the hem with muddy shoes while they were trying on the dress. I was disappointed as it was the only one in my size, but I tried it on anyway to see if it fit, and if it did, I could try another JCPenney store or order it online.

I had a hard time pulling up the zipper with my long nails  and with the dresses low back, I was not sure if I had zipped it up completely or had a ways to go. I just assumed it fit and planned to try another JCPenne later.

I tried on the other two dresses, as well as three more that I shagged during my second search through the racks, but they were so unimpressive that I cannot recall a single one.

Only one hour into my day out and the balls of my feet already hurting. I assumed that the 4-inch stiletto heels of my bootines were the source of my pain, but whatever the source, my feet were not going to take me to the opposite end of the mall to Sephora. Also, I wanted to shed my fake fur. It was too hot wearing it in the mall and I could tolerate the mid-40 temperature outdoors without outerwear for the short time out between my car and a mall entrance. So, I went back to my car, shed my jacket, and drove to the other end of the mall.

I had a shopping list for Sephora. I needed to replenish my powder foundation, translucent powder, makeup setting spray, and I had to replace the wig comb that I lost or misplaced. A Sephora sales rep greeted me and helped me find everything on my shopping list.

While shopping at Sephora, I encountered the sales rep who did my makeover over five years ago. She greeted me as if we were old friends, but just to make sure, I asked her if she remembered me. She said she did and when she described that encounter way back when, I knew that she really did remember me.

I thanked her for the words of wisdom she gave me during that makeover ("You only have one life to live and you should live it like you want. If someone has a problem, then it is their problem, not yours.") I have lived by those words ever since that day and I have been very happy doing so.

Paying for my purchases, the cashier complimented my perfume (Chanel No. 19) and informed me I had enough Sephora points to qualify for a free gift. I chose a tube of makeup primer, paid for my purchases, and headed for the exit.

Since I had parked at a Macy's entrance, I made a quick trip through their dress racks, found a couple of potential items, tried them on, but rejected them all. So I left the mall and drove to another mall (Westfield Mall) to try my luck at JCPenney.

Twenty-five minutes later, I arrived at the mall, but before heading inside, I decided to switch footwear to the flats I had recently purchased from Avon. Initially, they seemed comfortable, although they were a little tight. The "seemed" comfort lost out to the "little" tightness in short order.

In JCPenney, I found a rack of the dress of my quest. There were fewer dresses on this rack than at the other JCPenney and I thought that my odds of finding my size were not good. Lucky me: after checking the sizes of all the dresses on the rack, the very last dress I checked was in my size.

I grabbed two other dresses with potential and headed to the fitting room where I encountered the same zipper problem I had encountered with the soiled dress. Had I zipped it up all the way or not?

I managed to slip my arms out of the sleeves and revolve the dress 180 degrees to see what was what with the zipper. Turned out it had about five inches to go; there was no way I could zip it up all the way without removing some ribs.

Going in, I figured that the dress would fit because I had another dress that size  in the same brand (Allen B.) that fit perfectly. And when I tried the dress on, it looked great on me. So I was very disappointed; so much so that I did not even consider the two other dresses that I had dragged into the fitting room. I exited JCPenney and walked around the mall.

I visited Torrid and found their "optical illusion" dress to be interesting. I took a size 14 and 16 into the dressing room. To my surprise, the 14 fit and looked great, but I was not ready to spend $75 on a dress that did not outshine the $35 JCPenney dress.

My feet were not liking my tight shoes, so I visited Payless, which was just across the way from Torrid. They had a bunch of shoes in my size on sale, plus they were having a Buy One Get One (“BOGO”) at half price sale, so I tried on nearly everything they had in my size.

I purchased the two most comfortable pairs: a cute pair of black Mary Jane flats and a pair of black open toe sling backs with a 4-inch heel. Despite their heel height, I wore the slingbacks the rest of the day without a problem. By the way, between the sale and BOGO, the two pairs of shoes cost a mere $24.99.

The saleswoman at Payless was one I had dealt with a few times in the past at different Payless stores. On those previous occasions, I was always in boy mode, but I tried on girl shoes in the store, so the she knew I was a girly-boy. Now she was seeing me for the first time en femme. I mentioned that fact to her and she knew immediately who I was and was happy to see me in my preferred gender.

My last stop was Macy's. They had a much better selection of cocktail and formal dresses, both new and clearance, than the other Macy's. I tried on a half-dozen dresses. They were all very nice and of very high quality, so I was willing to pay more.

I narrowed down the selections and bought a "short sleeve, tiered floral lace scalloped hem cocktail dress." But overnight, I got a bad case of buyer's remorse and regretted not buying a long black formal dress with a pearl-embedded halter neckline that was on clearance.

The cocktail dress is very nice and it looks good on me, but I have plenty of good-looking cocktail dresses, while I own nothing like that formal. So, I plan to stop at Macy's today and if that dress is still on the clearance rack, it will be mine.

UPDATE: I went to Macy’s during my noon break and the dress was still on the rack. I grabbed it and took it to the cash register. The sales woman, who rang me up said it was the last one she had and gushed over how beautiful it was.

I told her I tried it on yesterday while I was en femme and it did look beautiful on me. She asked if I performed and we got into a conversation about drag.

When she rang up the dress, I was surprised. Its list price was $199, but it cost me only $55.

Many Happy Returns

Reviewing my day out shopping en femme on Thursday, I mentioned I was having buyer's remorse over the first dress I purchased that day: a long-sleeved A-line black and white that I purchased at Kohl's.

Truth be told, I bought that dress because I was a little desperate. After trying on a bunch of dresses at Kohl's, it was the best of the batch of the dresses that fit properly. I bought the dress just in case I was unable to find anything else that day.

As it turned out, I bought seven other dresses that day and they were all better than the one I bought at Kohl's, so I returned the dress for a refund today.

I also revisited my other purchases.

I loved the two dresses I bought at JCPenney, i.e., the little black empire dress and the black and white print sheath, which I wore out Thursday evening, as seen in the accompanying photo.

The JCPenney dresses were keepers, but I took a long hard look at my Dress Barn purchases.

I began to hate the way I looked in one dress (the belted white sateen shirt dress) and the thrill was gone with another dress (the black and white speckled print A-line), so I returned both for a refund today.

So I now have five new dresses instead of eight and $112 in my purse to spend on new shoes next time I am out shopping en femme.

Yesterday, All My Dresses Seemed So Far Away

I had a big day out en femme yesterday!

My plans were to do some shopping, dine and attend the monthly cocktail party at Real Art Ways.

Since the venue for my plans were all in the Hartford area, I decided to stay in an inexpensive motel in the area rather than drive back and forth to my home. The money I saved on gas almost paid for the room.

It was windy and unseasonably cool yesterday. I wore my Victoria's Secret lightweight sweater dress, black tights, black heels, and black sweater coat.

I was out the door about 10 AM.

My shopping goal was to buy new dresses for my trip to Dayton and other womanly outings during the upcoming months. I am a little embarrassed to admit that I bought eight new dresses!

Seven Dresses of April (click on the image to enlarge it)

My first stop was Kohl's. I was interested in some of the cute dresses they have been showing in their recent ads. I found some of the advertised dresses, but none in my size. However, I did find some in my size that had potential.

After three trips to the changing room, I bought a long-sleeved A-line dress with a black and white print (first dress on the left in the photo). I love black and white prints, but I am having buyer's remorse over this dress.

I left Kohl's and drove to the mall, where I intended to peruse the dress racks at JCPenney. I parked my car at the mall and walked into JCPenney. As I headed to the dress racks, a 30-something male store employee checked me out and as I walked away from him, he began singing "I'm in love."

That was nice!

I found a half dozen dresses of interest and hauled them all to the changing room. They were all the same size, but only two fit: a Vee-neck empire "little black dress" (second dress in the photo) and a sleeveless A-line black and white print. I bought both, exited the mall, and drove across the street to Dress Barn.

When shopping at Kohl's or JCPenney, you are on your own, but at Dress Barn, the staff is more attentive (my guess is that they work on commission). They help you find what you need, set up your own personal changing room, fetch another size if the item you are trying on is the wrong size, etc., etc.

I found four dresses of interest, carried them to my personal changing room and was very disappointed --- they were all too small.

This has been my experience at Dress Barn lately. Whereas, their size Misses 16 usually fit me in the past, now their Misses 16 no longer fit. I have not gained any weight, so the store must have adjusted their sizing.

As I headed to the Woman Size side of the store, I asked the saleswoman about it and she acknowledged that my suspicions were correct.

She then helped me find some dresses on the Woman Size side, I found a few myself, and hauled eight dresses to my changing room. They all fit and I liked five enough to purchase (the five dresses on the right in the photo).

• Belted white sateen shirt dress (third dress in the photo)

• Navy menswear ruffle color dress (fourth dress)

• Black jacquard sheath dress (fifth dress)

• Black and white speckled print A-line dress (sixth dress)

• Two tone (navy blue and white) graphic print shift with a boat neck and spliced short sleeves (seventh dress )

After over four hours of shopping, I was tired, so I returned to the motel to rest awhile before going out for dinner. I brought my purchases to my room to try them on again and decide what to wear for dinner and cocktail partying.

In my room, I realized I was very thirsty, so I left my room to go find the vending machines. When I got to the vending room, I discovered that I needed my electronic room key to access the vending room and then it hit me that I had left the key in my room.

I asked a cleaning woman if she could let me into my room, but she said I had to go to the front desk to get a new key.

Nuts! I was in boy mode when I checked in and now I was in girl mode, so the situation was not giving me the warm fuzzies. I hoped that someone new was working the front desk, but lo and behold, the same woman who had checked me in was working the desk.

I explained my situation to her and I could tell that she did not recognize me. She asked for my room number and last name and  looked quizzical when I responded. I told her I looked different now and she literally lit up when she finally recognized me. As she handed me my new key, she said, "You look very pretty!"

I thanked her profusely, bought an iced tea in the vending area, and returned to my room to model my dresses and pick one to wear for the evening.