10 Years Ago Today

Ten years ago today, I had one of my best Halloween experiences going to work en femme. I documented that day with a “live blog,” that is, I added to my Halloween blog post throughout the day as things happened (or did not happen). Here is a repost of that wonderful day.

8:03 AM Post:

Up at 5 AM. Took care of the menagerie and began the transformation at 5:35

I took my time doing my makeup (slow, but steady), so it took a little longer getting ready.

Out the door at 7:05 and I arrived at work at 7:40.

Although I only mentioned that I would be a woman at work to my boss, no one is surprised and expected me to do it.

8:30 AM Post:

When I walked in the building this morning, I asked our receptionist to take some photos. Here is one:

8:45 AM Post:

Three people noticed that I am wearing a new wig!

8:48 AM Post:

The receptionist just called me “Staci,” which is the name I used before switching to Stana. She also asked me how I tied my scarf and I gladly showed her.

9:15 AM Post:

There is a bit of a lull here, so here is another photo (sans glasses and cape) taken by the guy who sits in a cube adjacent to me. Instead of an iPhone, he used a Canon digital SLR camera.

10:05 AM Post:

I just attended a “gemba” (reps from various departments stand in a circle and update the group about the status of a project). The Director of Engineering ran this gemba and called me “Caitlyn.” He is always impressed with my “costume” and was impressed again this year.

A few other people did wear costumes today. 

10:20 AM Post:

A number of women complimented me on my outfit and they love my shoes (I do, too)! They are also amazed on how well I navigate in them... just like a woman.

I bought these shoes from Nine West two years ago, but I never had the opportunity to wear them until now because I did not have an outfit that went with them.

So far, they have been very comfortable despite their 4-inch heel.

11:05 AM Post:

Going to Dress Barn in a little while. The sales associates wanted to see how the dress they sold me on Monday looks on me today.

12:35 PM Post:

I went to Dress Barn and the sales associates who sold me the dress on Monday were not in the store; they work later in the day today.

Not to waste a Dress Barn visit, I browsed the racks and took a half dozen items to the dressing room. Some things looked and fit better than others. 

One dress fit perfectly and looked great: a simple figure-hugging black sheath dress with a gold front zipper that makes the dress. I bought the dress and returned to work.

1:00 PM Post:

As I got ready to leave Dress Barn, my feet started complaining loudly and when I got to my car, I switched to my black medium height wedges. 

1:15 PM Post:

Another lull, so it is time for another photo. My boss' boss took this one on her iPhone as I stood in her office doorway. 

1:53 PM Post:

It is very quiet here. Friday afternoon and things are winding down.

I am very tired. I went to bed late watching the Patriots, got up early to femulate and did not sleep that well in-between because I was excited about today. 

One of my biggest fans here just stopped in to ask me how it is going. He goes out of his way to use the proper pronouns when I am a woman and he once said that I missed my calling and should have been a professional female impersonator.

2:50 PM Post:

This will probably be my last live post for awhile because I am leaving work and going to the mall to shop for a new evening gown. My next post will probably be from home this evening.

7:30 PM Post:

I was successful at Macy's at the mall. I bought a Connected sequin-lace cowl-neck sheath in purple. The photo on the website does not do the dress justice; the sequin is not apparent in the photo, but it makes the dress in person.

My feet had recovered by the time I arrived at the mall and I switched back to heels for my mall tour.

I am going to bed early tonight. I am exhausted!

∞ ∞ ∞

The day-after post was an addendum to my live blog post, so in order to tell the whole story here it is.

I received a lot of positive comments about doing the live blog on Friday and plan to do it again if the opportunity arises and it makes sense to do it. Internet access is the key to doing it successfully, so doing it at work was a perfect scenario.

∞ ∞ ∞

Most of the live blog posts were short and I want to expand on what I wrote on Friday, so here goes!

∞ ∞ ∞

In the 10:05 AM Post, I mentioned attending a “gemba.”  When it was my turn to speak, I said “I had nothing” because I had no news regarding my part of the project under discussion. 

The moderator of the gemba, our Director of Engineering, asked me, “Are you sure there’s nothing you want to add?” 

Knowing him as long as I have, I am sure he was teasing me about my “costume.”

Anyway, after a long pause, I said, “No,” but after I thought about it, I wish I had said, “I guess you all figured out by now that I am transgender.” 

That would have been a gemba they would be talking about for years to come!

∞ ∞ ∞

When I went to show myself to my boss, I found her in her boss’s office (my boss and her boss are women and both know I am transgender, but now that I think about it, I bet that they don’t know that the other one knows because I came out to them separately).

Anyway, they were both wild about my “costume” and my boss’s boss blurted out, “You look better than (my boss)!”

I did not notice my boss’s reaction, but I think my boss’s boss might regret what she said. 

The truth is that although my boss is pretty and is about 10 years younger, I think I can modestly say that I compare favorably to her as a woman.

∞ ∞ ∞

Friday as a woman was more like two days as a woman: a day as a woman at work and a day as a woman outside of work.

Outside work, I felt like an invisible woman passing unnoticed among the civilians. When I interfaced with civilians like the sales associates at Dress Barn and Macy's, they treated me like a female customer. I sometimes suspect and detect that such treatment is due to the $ in the word cu$tomer, but on Friday I think the treatment was genuine. At least it appeared genuine to me and that is what counts.

At work, everyone knows me as a guy the rest of the work year who does a good job looking like a woman one day of the year. Five co-workers know what's really up, but I don't know what the other 70 people think.

Comments like “you look too good” or “you do it too well” infer that they suspect something is going on beyond a Halloween costume. And those are just the folks like our CEO on Friday, who are vocal to my face about it. Others probably have similar opinions, but keep their thoughts to themselves or amongst themselves.

Whatever their thoughts, they all seem fine with me. I have an excellent relationship with everyone in my office and that probably has made it easier for them to accept me (or put up with me) during my one day per year fling as a woman.

So why do I do it?

Of course, I love doing it, but there is a small ray of hope that someday I will be able to go to work (and go everywhere else) as a woman all the time. My Halloween fling is a test for me and my co-workers for when that wonderful day finally arrives and I think we all passed. 

Wearing Boston Proper

Dick Wesson femulating in the 1953 film Calamity Jane.

Halloween Eve

Wearing Trina Turk

Bruce Mars, Noam Pitlik, Joseph V. Perry and Dick Wesson femulating on television’s That Girl.

At Work En Femme

Halloween is “National Crossdresser’s Day,” so they say. I guess there is some truth in that because my first public crossdressed outing was on Halloween and I know many other crossdressers also poked their bewigged heads out of the closet for the first time on October 31. And over the years, I have continued to crossdress on Halloween to attend parties given by friends and COS. But, Halloween 2000 was different. 

One week before Halloween, my company announced that they were sponsoring a day of Halloween events including a costume contest. In all my years of being gainfully employed, no employer of mine had ever sanctioned wearing costumes to work on Halloween. I know some of you have gone to work en femme on Halloween and I often considered it, but I never had the nerve to do it. However, this year, I could go to work en femme with the blessing of the boss! T’was a crossdresser’s dream-come-true.

There was no doubt that my costume would be en femme, but how en femme was the question. I considered my options and decided to dress appropriately for my workplace, which is an office. My costume would be “office girl drag.”

I had a plenty of outfits that qualified as office girl drag, so I went through my stash to decide what to wear. I narrowed my choices down to three outfits. To make the final decision, I slipped into my unmentionables and modeled each outfit. My wife and I agreed that the black print, short-sleeved, knee-length sheath looked best. To round out the ensemble, I chose tan pantyhose and a pair of black patent pumps with 3-1/2-inch spike heels.

The night before Halloween, I prepared for the next day. I depilated, combed out my wig and laid everything out so I could get ready as quickly as possible Halloween morning. I turned in early because I had set the alarm clock for 4:45 AM to give me enough time to depart for work at 7:15 fully made-up and dressed. However, turning in early did no good because I was so excited I had a hard time falling asleep. It was after 2 AM before I finally nodded off and I woke up 15 minutes before the alarm clock was set.

I got up, shaved, showered and applied my makeup. For a change, I made no makeup errors and was finished by 6:15. I put on my undies, dress, shoes and wig, then I checked myself out in a full-length mirror. Was that Nicole Kidman’s reflection in the mirror? Not quite, but when I squinted real hard, I thought I saw Nicole Kidman’s mother.

Last thing to do was my nails. I glued press-on nails to my pinky and ring fingers, then I had an incredibly hard time gluing the nails to my middle fingers. None of the press-ons fit quite right and the glue could not make up the difference. Time was running out, so I decided to forgo the nails. After removing the press-ons from my pinky and ring fingers, I grabbed my purse and hit the pavement.

The commute was uneventful and I arrived at work 15 minutes early. I exited my car and walked to the main entrance enjoying the feminine beat of my heels clicking on the sidewalk.

Inside, the first people I encountered were our receptionist and a woman from Human Resources, who were lining up pumpkins for the carved pumpkin contest. At first neither of them recognized me. Then, they both recognized me and started gushing over my costume. So far, so good.

I went upstairs to my cubicle. Since I was early, there was no one around to see me, so I went to the cubicle of one of my best friends at work (she is one of the few people who gets to work earlier than I). I stuck my head around the corner of her cubicle and said, “Trick or treat.” She was floored!

After she regained her composure, she began calling me “Stella” and insisted on escorting me to the cubicles where other early birds were already at work. Our first stop was her boss, who had been with the company about six months. I don’t work directly with him, but he is only three cubicles away from me and we cross each other’s paths each day. My friend pushed me into his cubicle and he had no clue. At first he thought I was a new female employee, but my friend blew my cover, “Don’t you recognize him?” He didn’t until I explained that I was the guy three cubicles away.

And that was the way it went all day long. A tall woman in a Halloween costume environment is a dead giveaway. As a result, the majority read me as a man in drag, but did not know which man until I showed them the mug shot on my security card. On the other hand, a minority did not read me at all including some folks that I work with on a regular basis.

By mid-morning, the word was out that there was a guy in drag upstairs and a procession of onlooker began marching up to my cubicle to check me out. (No other guys appeared in drag. In fact, only a handful of guys wore costumes at all. On the other hand, the woman had a lot more Halloween spirit and approximately 1 out of 4 women appeared in costume.)

In general, women loved my costume. Some were amazed that I shaved my legs and my arms. Others complimented me on my makeup and some asked, “Did your wife do your makeup?”

“No, I did it myself,” I responded, which caused further amazement.

A few remarked that I should quit my job and become a professional female impersonator! One woman said, “I made her day,” and she returned to my cubicle three times with two or three new onlookers in tow each time. A pretty administrator remarked, “You look better than most women I know.” That made my day!

I don’t think I fooled everyone. A few women gave me knowing looks… like they knew I looked too good to have only done this once. But, I didn’t mind. 

On the male side, the majority appreciated my costume, but there were two or three who seemed to be phobic about it… typical macho twaddle, I guess.

Shortly after getting to work, my pantyhose began running like crazy! I don’t know if they were defective or I was careless, but by 10 AM, I had three runs that were getting bigger by the minute. I wanted to look my best, so I left the building for a few minutes and drove to a nearby CVS to buy a new pair.

Now, this is the scary part because the CVS was not having a Halloween costume contest. I parked the car and walked into the CVS passing a handful of people who paid me no mind. I entered the store and to avoid causing a commotion, I went to the first saleswoman I saw and explained that I ran the pantyhose of my Halloween costume and needed a new pair. 

“Hosiery is in aisle eight, Ma’am,” she replied unfazed by my Halloween costume hint.

I guess I was not going to cause a commotion, so I went to aisle eight, picked out a pair (only $1.99), then I went to the register where the same saleswoman rang me up without a clue.

Now, here is the amazing part. I never used a femme voice. I spoke in my normal male voice, which is admittedly soft-spoken, but definitely male. I guess the saleswoman’s eyes convinced her that I was a woman no matter what clues her ears might be picking up. (I had read about this phenomenon, but did not believe it until I actually experienced it.)

I returned to my office and waited for the results of the costume contest. A lot of people said they would vote for me and I guess they did because I won. I thought there were three or four costumes that were better than mine, but I guess having the guts to wear the costume I wore was that little extra that pushed me over the top.

I felt a little guilty about that because it did not take any guts to do what I did. This was something I wanted to do for a very long time. I also felt like I cheated a little because this wasn’t a costume I put together overnight. I’ve had practice dressing like this for years.

I’ll admit that I did have some qualms about possibly losing the respect of some of my colleagues. But when I thought about it, if somebody lost respect for me because I crossdressed on Halloween, then I don’t want their respect. So, qualms be damned! Tighten that corset as tight as you can. Today you are a woman!

I made one fashion blunder… my choice of footwear. I had not worn that particular pair of high heels in such a long time that I had forgotten why I stopped wearing them. Because they hurt a lot in a very short time! I have other pumps with the same heel height and even higher that don’t hurt like that pair did. The only saving grace is that I did not have to get up and walk around too much. I could just sit at my desk and pose for my admirers whenever they showed up.

However, I regret that I did not wear more comfortable shoes because I wanted to go to the mall, have lunch at the food court and do some window-shopping. But by noon, my feet were so hobbled that walking around the mall would have been very ugly.

I also had a fashion revelation. Wearing a tight corset all day was quite painless. The corset did inhibit movement, but it did not cause any aches or pains (like my shoes and clip-on earrings), while improving my figure immeasurably. 

I had the time of my life. I wished the day would never end, but it did and now I have a lot of wonderful memories about my first day at work en femme.

Wearing Shein

Jordan Peele and Keegan-Michael Key femulating on television’s Key and Peele.

Stuff 86: A Beauty Pageant

By J.J. Atwell

Part 1 - The Setup

Welcome to what will be a three part series about a crossdresser beauty pageant. 

Have you ever participated in one? I have and it was a lot of fun! Our local CD group, FEM Florida, has a yearly pageant. Well, yearly at least for the past two years, with number three coming up in November. 

I think competing in a beauty pageant is probably on every CD’s dream list. I unfortunately had to miss the first year it was held, but was able to enter last year. It was really a fun, but nervous, experience. As I write this, I am in the middle of planning for this year’s contest. But for now, let me tell you more about last year’s event. 

Here’s How It Worked

The “competition” was judged by five people and was conducted in four parts: interview with the judges, Sunday best, beach wear and talent. Those roughly correspond with the standard female beauty contest categories with Sunday best being more equivalent to formal wear and beach wear being substituted for swimsuits. That latter change was because the organizers didn’t want to worry about “fall out” as none of the contestants really have the body to pull off a typical skimpy female suit since we lack real boobs and have to hide that nasty bulge at the crotch. 

The panel of judges comprised three men and two women. They individually rated each contestant as they did each part. At the end, the judges compiled their scores and announced the results. I’ll cover that more in part three. 

So the call was put out to the membership with the date being set for a Saturday night in November at our secure clubhouse location. It turned out that we had six contestants, one of which was last year’s winner. 

Each contestant came with their own sash, most with imaginative names. We had names like Miss Understood, Miss Steak and Miss Lead. As an aside, I write a column in my group’s monthly newsletter entitled “Nothing,” which is similar to what I write about here in Stuff. With that background, I decided to participate under the name of Miss Nothing. 

In keeping with that concept, I purposely did not wear a sash. Instead, I gestured to the nonexistent sash every time my stage name was mentioned. Dumb? Well maybe so, but I thought it was a touch of humor. More on that later. 

I’ll Be Back

More about the beauty contest is coming up in part two next week. The picture at the top of this page is me in my Sunday Best. In the meantime, I welcome comments either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com.

Wearing Rebecca Taylor

Marty Thomas femulating on stage in Pageant: The Musical.

Stuff 85: Soaring

By J.J. Atwell

Caution: Philosophical Discussion

Today I’d like to venture a bit off the path of my usual musings. I’ve mentioned in the past that sometimes my mind goes off in different directions. For some reason, the early 70’s novella Jonathan Livingston Seagull popped into my head. 

For those who are not as old as I am, you might want to read the book or click here to read a summary of the book on Wikipedia.

TLDR

Yes, the book might be a bit too long for you to read. I don’t really expect you to read the whole book right now. Or even ever. The Wikipedia article is pretty good at describing the adventures of Jonathan Livingston Seagull (henceforth JLS). It’s an allegorical story about a seagull who learns that there is more to life than just being part of the flock. 

As the story unfolds, JLS expands his goal in life from more than just eating and surviving day-to-day as part of the flock. Instead JLS learns how to fly further and faster. He learns how to do tricks. To be a spectacular flyer. While others in the flock just think he is odd and some disavow him, he continues his quest. In the end, JLS has learned much about himself in his life quest. 

You Lost Me

What does the story of JLS have to do with the regular followers of Femulate in general, and my Stuff columns in particular, you may ask. Well, I warned you above that this was going to be a philosophical discussion. For those that followed my suggestion to check Wikipedia or even to read the whole book, try going back and substituting CD, TG or TS for the references to JLS. 

As we have progressed on our femme journey, we can relate to what the seagull experienced. It is us who are soaring above the flock. It is us who are leaving the squabbling flock below. As CDs (or whatever) we are different from the flock. We have a different lives and experience things differently.

I’ll Be Back

When you return from your JLS flight I’ll be back with more conventional Stuff. How would you like to hear about my participation in a beauty pageant. Never mind, don’t answer that. I’ve already written it and Stana will be publishing it as she see fit. I welcome comments either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. (The picture at the top of this installment of Stuff was created by ChatGPT.)

Wearing BGL

 

Bunny Lewis femulating in the British film A Couple of Beauties.

Stuff 84: Pronouns

By J.J. Atwell

A Quagmire

Way back in Stuff #7, which Stana published almost two years ago on August 28, 2023, I wrote a bit about the use of pronouns when referring to ourselves and other CDs. (Click here if you are curious about what I wrote then.) Go ahead, I’ll spare you the grammar lesson this time. 

So why am I revisiting pronouns today? I’m finding it a bit of a quagmire. 

Why the Confusion?

When it comes to CDs the proper pronouns to use can be confusing. Underneath this feminine finery, I’m biologically male. I spend 99.9% of my time presenting as male. My usual pronouns are he/him/his. Does putting on a dress automatically change that to she/her/hers? 

When to Use Them

Women have grown up being referred to using feminine pronouns. For them, it’s an affront to be referred to in any other way. Similarly, men are referred to using male pronouns and it’s often considered an insult to use the female pronouns with them. But, yes, you knew there was a but coming – what about those who present more androgynous? 

Let’s consider what pronouns to use when you aren’t meeting in person. Say you are simply texting somebody – a person that you know in both male and female lives. Is it “he” when discussing typically male stuff? Whatever that might be? And is it “she” when talking about girly stuff? Do you switch back and forth during a conversation? 

To further complicate the issue, what do you do when talking to your SO about a M/F married couple you know from your CD life. Do you talk about the CD half of the couple as male or female? Do you use the CD’s guy name or girl name? And does your SO make that leap when you switch pronouns while still talking about the same person? I really have no answer for this. I tend to talk about the CD in guy terms mostly unless it’s specifically about his/her CD side. But the potential for confusion is still there.

I Asked ChatGPT

First let me say that I don’t use ChatGPT to write Stuff. What you read here is all my own thinking directly from my brain to my nimble fingers and onto the screen. In addition to being a CD, I’m somewhat into new technology. I have a “smart home”. I’ve been using PC’s (Apple products) since 1978, and I’m also a ham radio operator like Stana is. So I’m no stranger to the current trends in the tech fields. 

Until now, I avoided playing with artificial intelligence (AI), but on a whim I decided to give it a spin. One of my first attempts was to ask ChatGPT about what pronouns to use when addressing a crossdresser. The response was...

the respectful approach is to ask the person directly what pronouns they use. Crossdressing is about clothing and gender expression, not necessarily gender identity, so pronoun preferences can vary.

A Good Rule of Thumb

• If you know the person well or if the context allows, ask politely, “Hey, just to be respectful — what pronouns do you use?

• If they’re presenting as a particular gender, use the pronouns that match their presentation unless told otherwise. For example, if someone is presenting in a feminine way and hasn’t said otherwise, it’s respectful to use she/her.

Always follow their lead and if you slip up, just correct yourself and move on — that shows care and respect.

I actually think that’s a pretty good answer. I’d love to hear how you approach the issue. 

I’ll Be Back

Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Marina

RIP: Terrence Stamp of The Adventures of Priscilla Queen of the Desert fame died Sunday (age 87).

Stuff 83: Support

By J.J. Atwell

We all need support

Let’s consider the subject of support today. No, not the kind of support you get from wearing a bra. I’m talking about how we get support from individuals, groups and the internet that help us present our best feminine self. Support that also helps our mental well-being. 

I start from the position that everybody needs support. It doesn’t matter if you are male or female. It doesn’t matter if you are CD/Trans/Whatever, everybody needs some kind of support. Sadly, some people don’t think they need support or, worse, providing support is enabling weakness. 

I was corresponding with a GG reader of Stuff and she mentioned that when out with friends they always take the time to compliment each other on some aspect of their outfit. They do it even when they don’t know if the friend needs it. It is just something that women do. 

As far as CDs like myself go, I’m lucky enough to get support from several sources. Broadly categorized as individuals, local groups and the internet. And yes, dear readers, that includes you that provide me with support.

Individual Support

I’ve developed a level of trust and support with a few individuals both GG and CD. I can exchange thoughts about being out en femme with them and get good feedback. That support helps me present better and more importantly, helps me gain confidence in myself. Even those of us who have developed confidence still need support to maintain it. 

I also try to reciprocate with other CDs. Sometimes the occasion is such that the individual is going through a rough stretch and just needs to vent. Sometimes everything is fine, but a compliment is always welcome. I’m making an effort to offer support for others and I hope you do as well. 

Group Support

Belonging to a local CD group is a huge level of support. You get to see and converse in person with others in similar situations. You also get an excuse to get out of the house and be yourself in the outside world rather than being trapped in your house. 

Our group meets monthly and some meetings are in a private clubhouse while others are a Girls’ Night Out at friendly restaurants. The group also has special events like a clothing swap and a beauty pageant. All of them provide our members with needed support.

Meetings of local support groups are a golden opportunity to get support. They are also a great place for you to provide that support for others. Those of you who are novices might wonder how they can be supportive to those who have been dressing for a long time. It’s easy, just compliment them on their outfit and ask their opinion about something. That gets the ball rolling and establishes support mechanisms for both of you. Yes, the line between individual support and group support is a bit blurry. 

Internet Support

It seems to me that you can broadly consider the various Internet sites as a support group. Some sites are more one-way than others. For example, Femulate is more about Stana and a few contributors sharing their thoughts, although there is some feedback from the readers. Yes, there is a comment section where you can post your opinion, but in my experience few of us actually do that. As an aside, I’d like to thank those who do comment on my Stuff, it is appreciated!

Beyond those sites, there are also discussion boards, like Crossdressers.com, where individuals post about their experiences and others chime in with their opinions. This gives close to the individual support I wrote about above. The difference is that those commenting don’t really know you and might not understand all the ramifications of your situation. Still, these provide a good way of getting support and providing support for others. 

I’ll be back

I’d like to close with my thanks for Stana providing this platform for me to express myself and for the folks that comment. It is a great source of support for me. As always, comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so if there is something you would like to read about please let me know!

Wearing ModCloth

Tracy Morgan femulating Maya Angelou on television’s Saturday Night Live.

Halloween 2017: The Rest of the Story

Thursday’s post described the beginning of my day out en femme on Halloween 2017. The post was a big hit, so this post will tell the rest of the story.

Rite Aid

My next stop was my pharmacy two doors up the road from my bank.

I never get red eye in boy mode, but in girl mode, it occurs often enough that I always carry a bottle of eye drops in my purse to relieve the unsightly problem. I attribute my girl mode red eye to eye makeup — either from the irritation that may occur when I apply the makeup or from makeup crumbs that may get in my eye. Anyway, I misplaced my bottle of eyedrops when I was out Saturday night, so I went to Rite Aid to buy a new bottle.

I seldom see the same people working in Rite Aid. Either there is a big turnover or they have a big staff all working less than 40-hour weeks. So it did not surprise me that I did not recognize any of the staff during my visit on Tuesday.

I found the eye drops and checked out without the cashier blinking an eye even though I greeted her with “Happy Halloween!”

Agway

We have cats (and dogs). We buy our cat litter at Agway because they carry a brand that we like and no one else sells that brand locally (as far as we have been able to determine). The Agway that sells our favorite litter is located a half hour away. That was convenient when I was working because it was only a few miles away from my workplace, but now that I am retired...

Since I originally planned to visit my former workplace, I figured I would be in the neighborhood, so I planned to stock up on litter. Carrying 40 pound bags of litter while wearing high heels and long nails would be challenging, but I was up for it.

I entered the store and the woman who runs the place was at the counter. I approached her and when she asked if she could help me, I said I was the “litter guy,” the self-named moniker I used whenever I phoned the store to see if they had the litter in stock.

“Who are you?”

Like the woman at the bank, I think she heard me, but could not believe her eyes, so I repeated my nickname and then I saw her expression change to one of recognition.

“Oh, sorry, but we are all out. The next shipment is next Tuesday.”

“OK, see you next week,” and I exited the premises without a word about my appearance or a “Happy Halloween.”

Not sure how she expects me to appear next week.

My last three stops on Tuesday were Roz & Ali (née Dress Barn), Macy's and Burger King. I will describe them in reverse order.

Burger King

My wife asked me to pick up some fast food from Burger King on the way home, so I stopped at the King closest to my home. Although it was in between lunch and dinner, this King is always busy because it is easy access from Interstate I-84.

I walked in, placed my order, waited five minutes for the special no-ketchup Whopper, received my order and exited the premises without incident. I was an invisible older women. Although a couple of guys did check me out briefly, they were younger and probably not interested when they saw I was old enough to be their mother or grandmother!

Macy’s

This was a “I'm feeling so great that I don’t want to return to boy mode stop” just to extend my day out. The store was not very busy — just a few older women like me perusing the racks. A couple of sales reps greeted me, but that was the extent of my interaction with any living beings.

I did find a beautiful Calvin Klein dress that was marked down considerably and I thought about trying it on, but I did not for reasons you will read below.

Roz & Ali (née Dress Barn)

I visited my favorite Dress Barn — the one near my former employer where they know me in boy and girl mode — also where I filled out a job application.

I know the manager and sales rep who were on duty by name and they know me by name. I had conversations with both of them about the store’s name change and I also asked the manager about my job application. She said they weren’t hiring right now because they had closed three other local Dress Barns during the summer.

Perusing the racks, nothing knocked me out, but I found two dresses in Misses size 14 that had potential and the sales rep opened a changing room for me. First I tried on a floral print. It fit perfectly and I was surprised how much better it looked on me than on the rack! It was a keeper.

The second dress was a sexy black number — something I could see Sophia Loren wearing. The top of the dress was too small and I could not zip it up. The sales rep found one in Woman's size 14W, which I was able to zip up easily, but it was too roomy in the waist, so I rejected it and went home with just one new dress to add to my wardrobe.

By the way, the reason I did not try on the Calvin Klein dress in Macy’s was because changing out and back into a skirt suit was so time-consuming at Dress Barn that I did not want to repeat it at Macy’s. Removing the jacket, skirt and blouse was easy enough, but putting everything back on was harder because the blouse had a lot of finicky buttons, so I did not think it was worth it especially since I had just bought a new dress at Dress Barn.

Hair Salon Redux

Ten days later, I had an appointment for a haircut at the salon I visited on Halloween. My hairdresser was off on Halloween, so after she seated me at her station, she said, “I’m sorry I missed you on Tuesday. The girls said you were beautiful.”

So I immediately retrieved my iPhone and showed her my photo taken in the salon on Halloween.

She took my iPhone, examined the photo closely and remarked, “You look like a businesswoman.”

“That’s what I intended.”

“You do look beautiful!”

“Thank-you.”

Bank Redux

The next time I visited my bank, the teller was the same teller who I saw on Halloween. The other two women staffing the bank were not working on Halloween. One is the teller I often deal with at the drive-through window. The other is the branch manager, who refinanced my mortgage. So they both know me well as a regular customer.

My teller handled my withdrawal and then she brought up the topic of Halloween. She said my “costume” was the best she had ever seen. Then she asked me if I had a photo on my iPhone so she could show the other women.

Of course, I did and she called the other teller over to see my photo. Needless to say, she was floored. Then she asked the bank manager if she had seen my Halloween costume photo.

She replied, “No, but I heard about it.”

Evidently, my costume was the talk of the bank staff.

I showed her my photo and she said I looked amazing!

“Amazing” was the word for Halloween 2017 and I will never forget it.

Wearing StyleWe

Kyle De'Volle