Boys and Gender Fluidity

Hollywood celebrities have become “way more experimental and accepting when it comes to parenting and letting children make their own choices” regarding the clothes they wear. The image above depicts just two examples, film stars Charlize Theron and Naomi Watts out and about with their sons. (Follow this link to read about other celebrities whose children are gender fluid in the way they dress.

Which reminds me of boys who femulate Disney princesses and boys who femulate mommies. 

I attended a public co-ed grammar school starting in kindergarten in the fall of 1956. My kindergarten class had two female teachers ― one middle-aged and one twenty-something.

For play time, the class of about 30 students was divided into five unisex groups. Each group took turns each day playing in different play areas: sandbox, toy blocks, art, play house, etc.

When it was my group's turn to play house, us boys played at being mommies, never daddies.

Some of the male mommies donned frilly aprons and “cooked” in the play kitchen, while other male mommies tended to the babies ― bottle-feeding Betsy Wetsy dolls and changing their diapers after they wet. When Betsy was dry, male mommies could push their babies around the classroom in doll carriages.

In addition to the frilly aprons, there was a toy box containing pocketbooks, high heels, lady’s hats and adult-sized dresses. There were not enough items to completely outfit each mommy, so we would select just an item or two for our femulations. (I usually tried to get a pocketbook and a pair of high heels.)

None of the male mommies rebelled at being feminized and some of us really got into it by affecting “female” characteristics, such as speaking in a higher pitch and using female mannerisms.

Initially, I felt embarrassed playing a mommy, but it did not seem to bother the other boys, so I played along like a girl with the rest of the boys. 

And so it goes.

Slip into this bodycon floral print velvet dress from Venus and you're set to steal the show from the other boys at this year’s Thanksgiving festivities.

Long-time Femulate reader and contributor, Aunty Marlena, invites you to visit her womanless photo collection on flickr. 

Men in Dresses

Mr. Billy Porter

We are accustomed to seeing fashion designers putting male models in skirts, dresses, heels, makeup, etc. and parading them down the runway often daintily carrying a purse or handbag. Despite their efforts, fashion designers have not had much luck getting their femme menswear off the runways and onto the streets.

But the times they are a-changin’ as male celebrities are now wearing femme menswear on the red carpet.

For example, Broadway star Billy Porter at the forefront of the trend showing up at various award shows and galas wearing femme menswear. But Mr. Porter took the trend to a new level with his appearance at the Peabody Awards wearing a fuchsia-colored, sheer tulle gown!

Wearing Venus

Antoni Porowski femulated for 2020 Pride

How Do We Dress When There's No One — and Nothing — to Dress For?

“When there’s no one to dress for anymore, how do we dress? Can clothes still bring us joy and self-expression when we’re all sitting alone in our homes? Do they lose their power without a witness?”

In a thought-provoking article on POPSUGAR Fashion, Lindsay Miller struggles with how to dress in this era of self-imposed social distancing. Her thoughts on the matter can apply equally to those of us who are closeted and only dress alone at home.

Click here to read Ms. Miller’s article.

Wearing Tahari ASL

Joe Pocknell femulating on stage in the British production of The Lady’s Trial in 2015.

First I look for the purse

Maybe it's just me. Maybe it has something to do with the environment or the era in which I grew up. But in my mind, a purse, clutch, handbag, pocketbook, etc., is the defining part of an outfit that indicates that you really mean business with regards to presenting femininely.

I can wear a wig, dress, heels, makeup, earrings, necklace, bracelet, pantyhose, tampon, bra, girdle, panties, etc., but until I add a purse to my outfit, only then do I feel that I am really femulating.

Without a purse, a guy in a dress still has a lot of freedom, especially in his upper body, to move and motion in a manly manner. Hand him a purse and that is a mare of a different color. She now has to move and motion differently; she must consider her purse at all times and move accordingly.

“Moving accordingly” means moving like a lady, that is, she must carry herself like other ladies who are carting a bag.

While you are at it, carry a nice bag. A designer bag is to die for and shows the other girls that you are really concerned about your feminine appearance.

A designer bag does not have to bust your budget; the consignment shops are full of like-new designer bags at cut-rate prices.

So, get a nice bag and carry yourself and the bag like a lady.

And happy femulating!

(By the way, Couture Allure Vintage Fashion has a how-to on the topic of carrying handbags.)

Double dating in matching dresses

More Feminine

Ever notice that in photos of femulators with their spouses, the femulator often dresses more "feminine" than the spouse?

Such is the case in my life.

In the last 10 years, I probably added 50 dresses to my wardrobe. In that same time period, my wife added two dresses to hers.

I own scores of high heels. My wife owns none.

I use lots of makeup. My wife uses none.

I wear lots of shapewear. My wife wears a bra.

Etcetera.

Source: Intermix

Linda Chang

More Hamvention Shorts

My Hamvention picnic outfit

I have been attending Hamvention most years since 1978. Before 2010, I attended in boy mode. Since 2010, I have attended as a woman.

As a well-known writer in the ham radio world, I made a lot of friends and acquaintances and when I attended Hamvention, I was on a first-name basis with a lot of the people staffing the booths at the show as well as with the makers and shakers in the hobby, many of whom made presentations at Hamvention.

When I began presenting as a woman at Hamvention, the only people who were aware of the change were the folks I came out to. Everyone else had no clue. Either they assumed I was the wife of a male ham attending the show or I was one of those rare female hams.

As a result, I had to reintroduce myself to the makers and shakers and folks who staffed the booths. And to tell you the truth, the first few years I attended as a woman, I was very shy and did not perform a lot of reintroductions because I worried how people would react.

When I realized that most people reacted positively to the change, I became more confident and outgoing and began touring the show with great abandon just as I did when I attended in boy mode.

Now I am again on a first-name basis with the makers and shakers and folks who staff the booths, but now that first name is "Stana" not "Stan."

📻 📻 📻

I lost one earring (a favorite from Napier) and my lip brush at Hamvention. Actually, my lip brush probably never made the trip. Last time I looked, it was in the bag that holds my makeup brushes, but when I did my makeup in Ohio Thursday morning, it was gone.

Back home grocery shopping on Wednesday, I checked the makeup aisle at Stop & Shop. Although they have a large makeup aisle including a big selection of makeup brushes, they did not have a lip brush.

Next I tried Rite Aid which has an even bigger makeup aisle, but still no luck. In case I missed the brush among the huge array of products in the makeup aisle, I asked a sales representative and she said, "I haven't seen a lip brush for sale in years. Does anyone even use them today?"

I replied, "I do."

Since I was in boy mode, she laughed.

I ended up ordering a new lip brush from Amazon. And I found the earring on eBay. Yay!

📻 📻 📻

As a ham radio operator, usually you have no idea about the people you contact over the air.

For years, Bill and I were key operators in a ham radio network spanning Connecticut and we worked together to make the network function efficiently. I never met Bill until I ran into him at Hamvention. (Yes, we traveled over 750 miles to meet each other even though we lived about 40 miles apart.)

After that first encounter, we usually met up at Hamvention each year, until I began showing up as a woman. As I mentioned above, I was shy those first few years attending as a woman, so I did not go out of my way to find Bill. Then about five years ago, I saw Bill sitting in the audience of a forum I was also attending and when the forum was over, I made a beeline to Bill to reintroduce myself.

Bill was surprised, but seemed OK with the revised me and said that I had to be true to myself. Since then, Bill and I usually meet up at Hamvention as if nothing changed.

This year, as I was returning to our booth after making my presentation, I heard someone call out my name and I turned around to find Bill waiting in line to buy lunch from a food truck. He informed me that he retired as a state police officer (I had no idea he was a state cop) and had moved to South Carolina. And then he said he wanted to introduce me to his wife, who was also waiting in line.

It does my heart good when a friend or acquaintance wants to introduce me to their spouse. It is so meaningful to me because they have accepted me as a real person, not a freak, but a woman.

Wearing Veronica Beard

Scott Willis femulating on stage in The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

Hamvention Shorts

Making a point during my Hamvention presentation

In my previous post, I mentioned there was a scheduling foul-up and my Friday morning presentation was postponed until Saturday morning and I would be presenting to a different group of people – not my usual crowd. My Powerpoint presentation was designed for my usual crowd and I would have liked to have tweaked it for my new audience, but there was no time for that.

As a result, I was very nervous and feel that I did not do a good job. On the other hand, the audience seemed to react positively to what I had to say and a handful of people said I did a good job, so maybe I am being too hard on myself.

Like last year, my presentation was videotaped, so when it gets posted on YouTube, I'll see for myself how I did.

📻 📻 📻

I saw about a half dozen Femulate readers at Hamvention this year (you know who you are). All were disguised as males, but it was great to see them nonetheless and I appreciate that they stopped by our booth to say, "Hello."

I also saw about a half dozen transwomen presenting as women. Some I know are post-op, the others, I dunno, but none stopped by our booth to say "Hello" to me. Although one post-op stopped by to see what our booth was all about. She spoke with me briefly, but there was no recognition on her part, so I assume she doesn't know me from Eve.

📻 📻 📻

As I mentioned before, going to Hamvention, I travel in boy mode in order to get on the road as soon as possible to avoid the commuter traffic in this neck of the woods. And as I did this year, I usually stay overnight in a Best Western on the Ohio border and depart for Dayton in girl mode the next morning. And on the way home in girl mode, I stop at the same hotel for the night and proceed home the next morning.

This year was the first time that the person at the front desk was the same coming and going.

When I showed up in girl mode Sunday evening, the front desk clerk did not seem to recognize me. At this hotel, I always request a room on the north side because the one time I stayed in a room on the south side, I was kept awake all night by tractor trailers downshifting on the exit ramp 200 feet away. So when I repeated the same request I had just made four days earlier, I thought she might recognize me, but she did not.

I asked, "I stayed here Wednesday night. Do you remember me?"

She replied, "No, I don't."

After I handed her my driver's license and she looked at it, she said, "Now I remember you."

And she added, "You look very nice."

📻 📻 📻

I overpacked again. (What else is new!)

I brought two pairs of shoes, a pair of jeans, a blazer, a shrug, a hoody, a jumpsuit, two belts and two wigs that I did not wear. I also brought some makeup, nail polish and jewelry that I did not wear.

Overpacking was not a big deal because I drove a car to Hamvention, but I plan to fly next year, so I have to improve my packing skills.

Wearing Boston Proper

Model Veit Alex and his mother.

Hamvention Wardrobe: The Long and Short of It

Full Booth Babe Mode

I had a wonderful long weekend at Hamvention. (But driving solo for 1500 miles puts a damper on the weekend, so somebody kindly remind me to fly next year.)

My wardrobe plans were to drive in boy mode the first leg of my trip on Wednesday so I could get out of Dodge as early as possible to avoid the morning commuter traffic in the Tri-State Area.

Thursday, I planned to wear my new Venus tailored romper for the second leg of my trip and to attend my group's board meeting in the evening. I thought I could enjoy wearing that leg-baring outfit without any pushback because not many people would see me. And most of the people who would see me were my peeps — the other board members and officers, people I have known for years and could count on to be perfect gentlemen.

Friday, I intended to wear my new Venus jumpsuit to Hamvention during the day and to my group's banquet during the evening. It was a conservative wardrobe choice because I would be making a presentation at the convention Friday morning.

Saturday, I planned to wear my vintage Studio 1940 ankle-length sleeveless dress to Hamvention during the day and to my group's picnic in the evening.

Sunday, I planned to wear my JCPenney white shorts and a new Haband short-sleeve print top to Hamvention in the morning and for the first leg of my trip home in the afternoon.

That is not what happened!

Thursday went as planned – I wore my new Venus tailored romper with my red Payless high heel pumps and matching red Kate Spade bag. I also wore a black camisole under the romper so as not to expose my bra.

On the road between Youngstown and Akron, the oldies radio station I was listening to played ZZ Top's "Legs" and set my mood for the day, not to mention the weekend. Although no one could see my leg-baring outfit as I traversed the Interstates, I felt very sexy wearing what I wore.

Arriving at my hotel, I checked in, moved my luggage to my room and took my laptop to the lobby to read emails and people-watch until it was time to go to the board meeting. In the lobby, I ran into a fellow board member, A, who was my ride to the board meeting.

As we stood in the middle of the lobby chatting, I noticed that I was being noticed. Almost every male, as well as a few females, who passed by checked me out. Some smiled at me and some mouthed "hello" as they walked by. Yes, she's got legs, she knows how to use them!

A suggested we repair to the bar before leaving for the board meeting. I agreed and while I drank a glass of wine perched high on a bar stool, the parade of admirers continued including a few who made suspicious repeated passes.

Another board member, B, who lives in Dayton hosted the board meeting. I have known him and his spouse, C, for over 20 years and they were very supportive as I came out.

When we arrived for the meeting, B was chatting with another board member, D, about some hardware timing experiments which did not interest me, so I visited with C in the family room. She gushed over my outfit and said I looked "cute." (That was a first.) And then she asked me if I intended to wear the outfit to Hamvention.

"Is it appropriate? Should I wear it?"

"You are young enough to get away with it."

"I'm 68."

She was incredulous. She thought I was in my mid-50's, not my late 60's.

"Well, you look young enough to get away with it. And if you do, just be prepared to receive a lot of attention."

Other board members were arriving, so I excused myself to join the boys and get on with the meeting.

📻 📻 📻

Up at dawn Friday, I got ready to attend Hamvention.

Made-up, underweared and stockinged, I slipped into my jumpsuit.

As I played with the finicky row of buttons on the front of the suit, I realized that it was not a good wardrobe choice. I assumed that I would need to visit the ladies' room more than once during the next 16 hours and having to get in and out of this jumpsuit would be difficult with its fussy buttons and my long fingernails. I have worn jumpsuits in the past that are easy off and on, but this was not one of them and I searched my closet for something better.

Something better was my vintage Studio 1940 ankle-length sleeveless dress, which I paired with a pair of black Payless ballerina flats (the most comfortable flats I own). In retrospect, it was a good choice because the weather was hot and humid on Friday and wearing the dress, I was comfortable throughout the day.

Overnight, I decided to wear my romper suit to Hamvention on Saturday. Short sleeved and leg-baring, it would be a good choice as the forecast was for more hot and humid. However, there was a scheduling foul-up and my Friday morning presentation was postponed until Saturday morning. Do I dare wear that sexy outfit in front of an audience of my peers, which trend conservative?

I thought about it and decided to go for it anyway. So up at dawn Saturday, made-up, underweared and stockinged, I slipped into my romper, slipped on my red high heels, grabbed my red bag and took the elevator down to the restaurant for breakfast.

The restaurant was packed. Mostly with other hams attending Hamvention, mostly male and mostly looking at me as my high heels clicked on the marble-like floor of the lobby and restaurant.

Arriving at Hamvention, I walked along with D and E, who gave me a ride to the fairgrounds. As I approached one of the exhibit halls, a group of guys from a ham radio manufacturer were shooting the breeze near the entrance of the hall waiting for the show to begin. When they saw me, they stopped talking and all eyes were on me until I disappeared inside the hall. And that is how my day went.

While traipsing around the fairgrounds of the Hamvention site, I wore my ballerina flats, but while staffing our booth, I was in full booth babe mode and wore my heels. Either way, I was an attraction.

No one seemed to mind what I was wearing when I gave my presentation. They laughed at my attempts at humor and applauded me when I mentioned that this was the 50th anniversary as a licensed amateur radio operator.

All this may sound like I am bragging. So here is an excerpt of what Brenda wrote in a comment on Monday, "Stana was an absolute knock out in that dress and was turning heads all over. As an attendee, she gets my vote for most beautiful woman at show. She also gets the 'hottest booth babe' and 'best legs' award."

It was a thrill!

Wearing Unique Vintage

Kenneth Williams and Charles Hawtrey femulating in the 1960 British film Carry On Constable. (📺 Femulation begins at 4:20 of this clip)

Peer Appearance

Karen Bigelow: A Peer

What do celebrities Kirstie Alley, Jane Seymour, Kathryn Bigelow, Lynda Carter, Angelica Huston, Cheryl Ladd, Pam Dawber, Karen Allen and Patricia Wettig have in common?

They were all born in 1951, so they will all be 68 years old by the end of this year, just like me.

Cool cats occasionally scold me that I dress too young. My hair is too long, my skirts too short, my heels too high and my makeup too too for a 68-year-old woman. They whine that I should "dress my age!"

OK — so how do I dress my age?

I know how my grandmothers dressed when they were in their 60s (back in the 1960s coincidentally), but no one of any age dresses like that today.

Looking around to see how my peers dress does not work because I am bad at guessing peoples' ages, so I am never sure who are my peers age-wise.

So I resorted to the Internet.

I searched "women born 1951" and Google came back with a variety of lists of famous people born that year. After checking to see if I made the list (I did not), I checked to see who did.

I culled the females from the top of the lists, searched the Internet for any of their photos taken during the past 12 months and I found recent photos of the females mentioned above. (By the way, four of them also appear on my Famous Females of Height List: 5'8" Kirstie Alley, 5'9" Lynda Carter, 5'10" Angelica Huston and 6' Kathryn Bigelow.)

First I looked at the hair. None had hairdos shorter than mine. Two wore pageboys and the rest wore shoulder-length or longer hairdos. Therefore, based on my peers, my hair is too short for a 68-year-old woman!

Next I looked at the shoes. All wore heels of various heights. Hard to be exact, but I estimate that the average heel height was in the 3 to 4 inch range. (Hands down, the tallest female, Kathryn Bigelow, wore the highest heels.) So I conclude that my choice in footwear, that is, heels in the 2 to 5 inch range fit right in with my peers.

To determine how much makeup a person wears, you need a photo of that person without makeup to compare it with a photo of that person with makeup. I had no photos without makeup, so determining how much makeup my peers wear was difficult.

Nearly all of them wear eye makeup, probably no more or less than I do. Nearly all also wear lip color, but here is where I need to make an adjustment. No dark reds, so if I want my lip coloring to match my peers, a more natural lip color should be my goal.

I knew going in that skirt length might be my downfall and I was correct. Most of the hemlines were in the neighborhood of the knee, either at the knee or slightly above or below the knee. None wore a thigh-high hemline like I occasionally find myself wearing.

In conclusion, all I have to do is wear a more natural lip color and lower my hemlines, then I will be dressing my age. On the other hand, life is too short, so maybe I will wear whatever I damn well please!

Wearing Wholesale 7

Carollyn Olson wearing Venus

2019 Fall-Winter Palomo Spain Menswear Collection

The six images above are from the 2019 Fall-Winter menswear collection from Palomo Spain. Wow! We've come a long way, baby!

(This is not an April Fools' Day joke! That's below.)

SPECIAL: A Monday Someday Funnies!

Wearing Ann Taylor (Source: Ann Taylor)

Kenneth Williams and Charles Hawtrey femulate in the 1960 British film Carry On Constable.