Hard Work

My wife often comments that since it takes so long for me to get ready to go out as a woman, is it worth it?

Of course, it is worth it (what a silly question), but she does make a legitimate observation, i.e., it does take me a long time to get ready.

My excuse is that I am obsessive compulsive. According to Wikipedia , "The phrase "obsessive-compulsive" has worked its way into the wider English lexicon, and is often used in an offhand manner to describe someone who is meticulous or absorbed in a cause. Such casual references should not be confused with obsessive-compulsive disorder…" (So, I'm not nuts, just a little crazy!)

As a result, when I go out as a woman, I want to look as perfect as possible, which means flawless makeup and not a hair showing that should not be showing.

I love putting on makeup and if I have the time, I indulge myself in the makeup process and can while away an hour or so putting on the war paint. But usually I don't have the time and I must get the job done as quickly as possible.

After years of practice, I have my makeup routine down to about 35 minutes if everything goes smoothly. I see no way of reducing that time without cutting corners and I refuse to cut corners, so I invest 35 minutes putting on my face.

The actual dressing is the easy part. I usually have my outfit picked out beforehand and I can have it on from soup to nuts, or should I say from girdle to wig in 15 minutes or less.

The wig I wear these days is a "shake and bake" wig. I just shake it out, put it on my head, make a few adjustments, and I'm done. I use self-stick pre-glued nails and they go on in less than five minutes with no muss or fuss. So, once my makeup is on, I can be out the door in less than a half hour.

Now the part I hate: hair depilation.

I am hairy. It is everywhere and depending on what I plan to wear, it can take 30 minutes to an hour just to get rid of it all.

I have long legs and they alone take some time to depilate. If I wear anything other than a long sleeved dress or top, then I have to depilate my arms. If I am wearing anything that exposes my shoulders, then they must be depilated, too. And so it goes for my chest and back if I am wearing anything that is low-cut in the front or back. Shaving my face is a joy in comparison.

When I come face-to-face with my hairy problem, I start thinking that my wife might be right, is it worth it?

Yes, it's hard work, but I still think it is worth every minute of it.

Wearing Fleur Du Mal pants, Rag & Bone blazer and Alexander Wang sandals.

Sorcordia

Dress to Blend vs. Dress to Empress

Yesterday, I received an e-mail noting that I overdress and suggesting that I should dress to blend in with the other ladies. To support this suggestion, the e-mailer added that when Kate Middleton is off duty, she wears jeans and sneakers. I never denied that I overdress and replied, "Kate Middleton is only a princess, so she can get away with jeans and sneakers. But I am a queen and must dress like a queen all of the time!"

 

 

 

Wearing Time’s Arrow bag.

 

 

 

Navy hero Don Winslow femulates in this February 1944 installment of his daily comic strip.

Sunday On My Mind

I got a late start today.

I watched most of Saturday Night Live last night, so I did not get to sleep until 1 AM.

I was up at 6 AM to feed the cats and back in bed at 6:05.

I slept until 8 AM. Shaved, showered, moisturized, fetched the paper, walked the dog, made breakfast, ate breakfast, cleaned the litter boxes, did the laundry and before I knew it, the clock struck 12!

An e-mail yesterday got me thinking about the Sundays when I was a young girly boy dressing in my Sunday best to go to Mass and wishing that I was wearing my sister's Sunday best and not mine.

On the way home from Mass, Dad would stop at the newsstand to buy the New York papers and comic books for my sister and I. Typically, I would pick out some costumed DC superhero offering and my sister would pick out something from the Harvey line - Little Audrey, Dot and Lotta - something girly that I would eventually read, too.

Tammy e-mailed me a link to an article on The Huffington Post about the upcoming gender swap issue of Archie Comics. The article includes links to other articles on the topic of gender diversity in the comic book world.

It was interesting. I don't buy comic books anymore, but I may buy Archie next month.

Also, I don't go to church. Kneeling bags my nylons.