My Trip with Anna: A Journey to Enlightenment

A true story by Paulette Parfois

Paulette Parfois

Having lived on this planet for 70+ years, I continue to marvel over how life teaches us lessons when we least expect it. One of the most life-changing moments in my life occurred several years ago when my wife and I were waiting to board an overnight flight (a “red eye” to us Road Warriors) from Denver to Miami.

We were sitting in the embarkation area waiting to board our flight. A young woman came and sat across from us. It was readily apparent she was either a crossdresser or transsexual and she was not passing very well.

At the time, I was a senior executive for a major US cable television company and to be honest, I was “full of myself.” To make matters worse, I was in a particular snarky mood that night and began texting unflattering comments about her to my wife. I was impressed by my witty and acerbic commentary and was quietly chuckling to myself. 

The time came to board and since we had early boarding, we were some of the first to get on the plane. We sat down across the aisle from one another (my wife and I both prefer aisle seats). 

Shortly thereafter, general boarding began and I noticed the young woman coming down the aisle. I texted to my wife “just my luck she sits next to me.” Just as I hit the send button, a masculine sounding voice said, “Pardon me. I think I have the seat next to you.” Yes, it was her!

As she settled into her seat, we exchanged polite pleasantries as airline passengers tend to do. She told me her name was Anna. Since I was looking forward to some sleep and was more than slightly annoyed she was sitting next to me, I tried my best to keep my replies short. However, she was so pleasant and engaging I could not help but to respond. 

She told me she was an archaeologist and taught at a university in the Denver area. My wife, who has a passion for archaeology, heard her and perked up from her light dozing. After some discussion about archeology and my wife’s experiences as an amateur archaeologist, the subject changed to Anna’s transition. 

Anna told us how she had only recently completed transitioning and that she was returning to her hometown for her 20th high school reunion. She said she was from a small town on the southern shore of Lake Okeechobee. Having lived in Florida about the time Anna was in high school, I recalled that her hometown had a reputation of being kind of a “deep-in-the-swamp” town and not too receptive to those different from them.

Anna told us she had not been back home for several years and that her family had not seen her since her transition. She was more than a little apprehensive about the welcome she was going to receive. 

As she told her story about her struggles and with coming to terms with her gender identity, I found myself enthralled by her courage and determination. I also was thinking about what kind of reception she was going to receive in her hometown.

To make a long story short, the three of us talked and laughed the whole flight (I am sure much to the annoyance of fellow passengers trying to get some sleep).

When the plane arrived in Miami, I found myself wishing the flight was longer. As we started to embark, I reached over and hugged Anna and told her she would be in our prayers during the coming days. She sweetly smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I almost broke down and cried. 

We promised to keep in touch as passengers on long flights tend to do, but we never did. However, she has remained in my thoughts for all these years. I hope it worked out for her and she is comfortable with her new life. I have silently thanked her many times over the years for bringing me from being opinionated and bigoted to becoming compassionate and understanding.

As I said, life has a way of teaching us lessons we never expected to learn. When I began my adventure crossdressing as Paulette, Anna’s example of fortitude and courage allowed me to fully appreciate the diversity and beauty in people. So, thank you, Anna from the bottom of my heart. You are and will always be a bright beacon in my journey as Paulette. 

Life is good and its lessons are lasting!

Wearing J.ING

Femulate reader Caro toasting a friend on her birthday.

We don’t need no stinking trousers!

Monday’s post (“Dresses & Skirts – A Thing Of The Past?”) by Carollyn Olson received a lot of interesting comments. What follows is my take on the subject.

I seldom see civilian women in dresses or skirts. At the mall last week, I saw one woman in a skirt – all the others were in pants. However, there were still racks of dresses for sale in Macy’s. Don’t know who’s buying them because nobody was wearing them. Maybe they should move those racks to the men’s department because it seems that “men” like us are more likely to wear dresses than cisgender women.

Despite what civilian women are wearing or not wearing, I still dress up when I go out. In addition to the dress, I am fully coiffured and wear heels, hosiery, handbag, jewelry, bra, girdle, full makeup, etc. – just like when Mom when she used to go out. (She taught her “daughter” well.)

People notice. But what’s wrong with being noticed? Being noticed may result in compliments and what girl doesn’t like to receive unsolicited compliments on their appearance.

I’ve received compliments from complete strangers while out and about. My favorite occurred one day while I was looking through the racks at JCPenney. 

A middle-aged woman (same age as me) approached and asked, “Can I ask you a question.”

I had no idea what she was going to ask (“What time is it?” “Where did you buy your shoes?” “Are you a transvestite?”). I girded my loins, smiled and agreed to answer her question.

“You're dressed fashionably, so I'd like your opinion about a pair of slacks I was thinking about buying.”

Wow! I did not see that coming!

I did not like the slacks that she had picked out and suggested something with a bolder pattern. She admitted that she really did not like her pick and liked my suggestion better.

I pointed out a skirt with a pattern similar to what I had in mind and her eyes lit up as she said, “I saw slacks with that pattern. Now I just have to find them again! Thank-you for your help.”

It does not get much better than that! But how ironic: a “man” wearing a dress helping a woman shop for slacks!

I admit I have a few bifurcated garments in milady’s wardrobe. But I seldom wear them. Maybe when I attend a very casual affair like a cook-out or a softball game. Otherwise, I’m in a dress. 

After all, they don’t call it “cross-trousering,” do they?

Wearing JustFab

Femulate reader Heather Elizabeth Stevens, not out and about as often as she would like. Hotel stays while on business trips after a long day typically finds Heather short on time to get out, yet she still adores having her time in a hotel with a glass or two of wine and friends on the Internet.

Dresses & Skirts – A Thing Of The Past?

By Carollyn Olson

“We don't need no stinkin' skirts!”

Are dresses and skirts becoming extinct?

Look around! Do you see many women wearing dresses or skirts? 

This came to my attention recently when my spouse and I walked through our local mall one night after dinner and I only discovered only one woman wearing a dress and two others in skirt ensembles. What’s going on? (Note: I noticed eight to ten older women wearing dresses or skirts at church last Sunday. The younger ladies were wearing slacks).

As a long-time crossdresser, I love wearing dresses and skirts. I have my share of skinny jeans and leggings, but I prefer a classy dress or skirt when going out and about.

I have noticed women are more casual and ofttimes, sloppy in their appearance. The younger they are, the worse they dress. When at the mall, I saw more females wearing pants, shorts, yoga pants and torn and holey jeans. One girl, walking in front of us was wearing jeans so badly torn that her bare rear end was showing. Disgusting!

I decided to contact my long-time friend, Melissa, the woman’s department manager at a major department store, for her opinion.

“Women are not buying dresses or skirts like they have in the past,” Melissa related. “I don’t know if they are lazy or don’t want to show off their legs. Our store has cut back on both dresses and skirts due to lack of sales. So has Macy’s. Fancy dresses, such as wedding, prom, holiday or special occasion are still popular, but they are mostly seasonal. We still have a good inventory of fancy dresses for the teens, but every day casual dresses just don’t sell. I still like wearing dresses and looking good, but I’d say I wear a dress or a skirt outfit to work only once or twice a week.” 

Melissa reminded me of the Sears stores, prior to the company going out of business.

“As a part of my job, I visit the stores in direct competition with our store. Inventories are down everywhere. I could not find one dress at the Sears in our mall in its final year or so of operation,” she recalled. “The only Sears store with dresses was about ten miles from our location.”  

For a crossdresser, multi-style dresses and skirts are readily available on the Internet, but sadly, not in the stores, so one can try on the dress prior to purchasing. One great site is En Femme, where the company designs dresses and skirts with the crossdresser in mind. 

I have at least six En Femme dresses, which I cherish and love to wear when out andabout. Three are what you might call “party dresses” and the others can be worn for any occasion. Check out the wonderful dresses and skirts on the En Femme site. You can’t go wrong!

I’d love to hear your opinion!

UPDATE: Carollyn thanks everybody for their responses and wishes everyone a blessed Thanksgiving!

Wearing JustFab

Femulate reader and blogger Julie Shaw out and about.

Who Wore It Better?

I was up at 5:30 AM and the first thing I did was power up the TV to watch the weather and traffic reports.

I tuned to channel 8, WTNH out of New Haven and the talking heads (Keith Kountz and Laura Hutchinson) were at it. Suddenly I am wide awake as I notice that Laura is wearing the same Calvin Klein dress that I own –– the white cable knit sweater dress I am wearing in the photo at the top of the blog.

That is second time in the past month that I noticed a woman wearing the same dress I own. The other was Kate Goselin, who was wearing a Calvin Klein color block dress that I own.

I have to say that Laura and Kate have excellent fashion sense!

Wearing Veronica Beard.

Ryan Downey, male womenswear model

The Joke Known as "Sizes"

About two weeks ago, I complained here about the "new" Spiegel, specifically that "their sizes now run small --- so small that their largest sizes no longer fit me."

So what possessed me to buy a Spiegel dress a few days later?

It was a very nice looking dress (just my style), but its $8.85 price tag (marked down from $149) is what pushed me over the edge.

I figured that if it did not fit, I would not return it because the shipping cost would eat up its sale price. Instead, I would sell it on eBay, let someone else pay for the shipping and I would probably make my money back (Even Steven!) or maybe make a profit.

The mailman delivered the dress in the middle of last week. I quickly stripped down to my manly underwear and tried it on. I managed to get it on, but it seemed a little tight and I had visions of eBay in its future.

During a break from all the Father's Day festivities (wasn't the parade fantastic!), I found time to slip into my unmentionables and try on the dress as it was intended to be tried on.

It fit perfectly and looked gorgeous!

Back in March, I had to return two size 16 dresses to Spiegel because they were way too small. One was so small that I could not get it on at all and the other was not much better --- I got it on, but it looked terrible because it was so tight.

The $8.85 dress is also a Spiegel size 16, so go figure!

 

Actor Walton Goggins femulating on television’s Sons of Anarchy, 2012.

 

Wearing DressBarn.

Preparation

I began preparing for my Saturday night out to attend my law school reunion.

Yesterday, I configured my GPS to take me to the Basketball Hall of Fame. (It's 46.1 miles, 1 hour and 1 minute from my house to the Hall.)

I washed my wig last night and shaved my armpits this morning.

Still undecided about what to wear, I went through my closet last night and picked out four dresses that I may wear. Tonight, I will look through the storage closet and see if there are any oldies, but goodies to consider.

And after reading Ginger Burr's blog post today (Are Nude Stockings Posh or Passé?), I am grabbing my purse, (I guess I should say "man-bag" since I am in boy mode) and going shopping for thigh highs to wear tomorrow night.

Catch Up

Starla came up with 35 additional high school yearbook femulations and I uploaded them to the Yearbook Femulations collection on flickr. (The collection now contains 1,057 images!)

By the way, the easiest way to view the latest additions to the collection is to go to my photostream. The newest uploads begin on the first page of the photostream. 

"Imagine a world where someone with a penis can wear dresses every day if this person desired. Gender-neutral bathrooms and department stores and professional sports become the rule rather than the exception to it. Children can play with whatever toys they prefer."

Allison Hope expounds on this at The Huffington Post in her article titled "A Penis and a Dress: Why the Gender Binary Needs to Go Away."

Meanwhile, Glamour offers the following advice: "10 Dresses Every Woman Should Own." In light of the previous article, perhaps "10 Dresses Every Dress-Wearer Should Own" is more appropriate.

Shopping at the Barn

Out en femme last Tuesday, I bought three pairs of leggings at Macy's. When I took my leggings home, I realized that I needed a new top or two to wear with my leggings, so I added tops to my to-buy list for the next time I go shopping.

I also noticed that I the majority of my dresses are blacks, grays, and browns, so I also added "colorful dresses" to my to-buy list.

Today, I realized that in two weeks and two days, I will be traveling to Dayton for the Hamvention and time was a'wasting to buy clothes for the trip.

So at lunch time, I grabbed my to-buy list and my Dress Barn dressbarn scratch-off discount coupon and went shopping at the Barn in boy mode.

Saleslady Laura did not bat an eye when I told her I was shopping for myself and she helped me pick out a slew of tops and dresses to try on and that I did.

After tryong on about six tops and eight dresses, two tops and four dresses made the initial cut.

I eliminated one top because I thought it was too pricey and too see-through and I eliminated one dress (navy blue with white polka dots) because it was not "colorful."

My scratch-off coupon only saved me 15%, but I did qualify for a free journal.

Here is what I bought:

Floral Cardigan and Tank Duet (top left). Gracing a tropical wash of watercolors, lacy silver-flecked blooms taper off into ruffling lace-trimmed sleeves and a fluid pointed hem. Attached lace-trimmed tank. Short tiered sleeves. Pointed hem.

I think this duet will go nicely with my black leggings that have lace on the hem.

Collared Floral Dress (top right). Circled by a bright buttoned collar, summery shades of peonies and apple blossoms bloom atop the panels that ring the neck of this shift. 41" length from shoulder to hem. Nonfunctional button on collar. Center back zip.

This dress is so cute; it just skims the top of my knees.

Abstract Cap-Sleeve Dress (bottom left).Gentle gathers crisscross at the bust of a cap-sleeve sheath covered in abstract confetti of watery hues that ripple into a fluid skirt.44" from shoulder to hem. Lined bodice, light shoulder pads. Pull over.

The photo does not do this dress justice. It is hugs my figure, covers my knees (yeah - I know - unheard of), and the color looks great on me.

Bordered Abstract Dress and Bolero Duet (bottom right). This flared frock's leafy splashes of color are complemented by a matching grosgrain ribbon belt and bright bolero. 44" length from shoulder to hem. Hidden back zip with hook-and-eye at top on dress. Fully lined dress; elbow-length sleeves on sweater.

This dress is probably my favorite purchase of the day. The skirt of the dress flares out more than the photo indicates and it looks so good without the bolero, I wear the dress without it.

Now I think I am all set for Dayton except for packing.

all bundled up

On Thanksgiving Day, I went to New York City to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. I had a great time, even though there were fewer celebrities in the parade that I recognized than there were last year.

Last year when I wrote about my trip to The City to view the parade, I noted that half the woman I saw "wearing skirts or dresses were also wearing black tights with black patent high heels." This year, the weather was a lot cooler and most women were bundled up to stay warm.

One woman in our group wore an incredibly short skirt, with black tights and black patent heels despite the weather (something I would do), but she was the exception. Most women were dressed appropriately for the weather including Miss USA (pictured here), who looked beautiful. Click on the photo to magnify the image and check out her boots!

the perils of going out en femme

Last night, I went out en femme wearing my new babydoll dress that I bought during my last outing (see photo).

I did my makeup the way the Sephora representative suggested during my makeover and I was very pleased with the results. I love the new powder foundation; being a powder, it is very lightweight, but it does an excellent job as a foundation.

I tried to replicate what the Sephora rep did and I thought I did a decent job, but after looking at my photos from last night, I don't think I did my eyes correctly. Well, practice makes perfect and I will have another go at it real soon now.

Out the door and on the road, my first stop was Dress Barn to pick out and try on outfits to model at my support group's in-store party.

The Dress Barn saleswoman, who I have been working with organizing the party, accompanied me through the store and we picked out a large handful of items to try on.

While we were looking through the racks, a new customer walked in, who happens to be a woman I worked with for ten years or more. She left my company two years ago, but I thought she might recognize me because she had seen me in drag when I went to work en femme on Halloween a few years ago. Then, I wore an auburn pageboy wig and was about 15 pounds heavier, so she might have not put two and two together seeing me last night in my short blond wig, but I was still very concerned because she still has friends at my workplace and if she had any suspicions, I am sure it would get back to work because she is a "gossip."

I told the Dress Barn saleswoman about my concerns. Luckily, we had already picked out a load of outfits to try on, so she escorted me to a dressing room in the Women's section of the store far away from my former co-worker, who was shopping in the Misses section of the store.

I began trying on clothes. First, I tried on the three holiday party dresses we selected. The one I liked the best did not fit in the bust area. The other two fit perfectly and I chose one to model at our party.

Next, I tried on the daytime "office girl drag" outfits we selected. The first outfit I tried on was my favorite: a clingy multi-colored top and a black skirt with a black patent belt.

I had my doubts about the outfit. I just don't look good in outfits like that (skirts and tight tops) and the only way to make them work is to wear a jacket or cardigan to cover up what needs covering up.

But I was pleasantly surprised! Just as I was buttoning up the skirt, my saleswoman returned to see how I was doing and she said the top and skirt looked great. I had to agree. I love my new weight! A girlish figure with no bulges where there shouldn't be bulges. (Nine pounds down and I plan to lose more.)

I was done, so I got dressed, and escaped without encountering my woman friend. I was a little disappointed because I was hoping to do more browsing and take my time in Dress Barn. But it worked out anyway because I did what I went there to do despite my unexpected encounter.

My next stop was the first meeting of the Non Conforming Gender Variant Group(s). Since I exited Dress Barn so early, I was too early for the meeting, so I stopped at the Payless shoe store, where I have shopped numerous times for women's shoes while in boy mode. It would be my first time shopping in that store en femme and as I walked into the store, I noticed that the two saleswomen were the same saleswomen I had dealt with in boy mode.

I tried on a lot of shoes, but did not buy anything. I was just killing time and really did not intend to buy anything unless something really moved me and the only pair of shoes that moved me to make a purchase, did not fit.

I exited the store and the saleswomen bid me adieu. I don't know if they figured me out. They might have realized I was male, but I doubt that they realized I was the male who had shopped there for women's shoes in the past.

I arrived right on time for group meeting. Thirteen people showed up including five significant others (SO's). I knew everyone except two (a tranwoman and the SO of another transwoman).

Each of us told the group about ourselves and conversations were spun off from what different people said. I spoke first because no one else wanted to speak first and I gave my bio in a nutshell. There was no spin off from what I said.

Two hours flew by and it was very interesting, but with five couples in attendance, the conversations were more couples-oriented and not too pertinent to me. It's not that I don't have issues with my SO, but these conversations did not deal with my issues. And so it goes.

Thirty minutes later, I was back home and back in boy mode already looking forward to my next time out en femme.

Friday fun en femme redux

I was frustrated finding images for my "Friday fun en femme" blog posting. Neither the JCPenney or Dress Barn Web sites had those items I bought online, so there were no images to grab for my posting.

I revisited the JCPenney Web site last night and I did find an image of the skirt I bought, but in a different color, and I found a dress that is very similar to the one I bought at Dress Barn.

The skirt is an east5th long bias-cut skirt, described as follows:

A flattering A-line style makes a very versatile asset.

* tailored with a wider waistband
* invisible side zipper
* length looks good with boots, too

east5th long skirt has a full polyester taffeta lining. Plaid is polyester/rayon; solids are polyester/rayon/spandex. Washable and imported.

The version pictured here is Black/Polar Bear Plaid. The one I bought is Red/Polar Bear Plaid and is much prettier than the black version.

The dress is a Sandra Darren, described as follows:

Sheer mesh and satin stripes update the little black dress into a stunning favorite.

* softly pintucked
* mesh is layered over a black slipdress
* ribbon belt
* tailored and relaxed fit

Pintuck dress is polyester. Hand wash, line dry. Imported.

By the way, I had to look up "pintuck" and here is a definition: a small, narrow fold of fabric stitched together to create the appearance of a line or stripe.

The big difference between the dress pictured here and the one I bought at Dress Barn is that the pintucks on my dress are gold and silver and give the dress a completely different and amazing look. (When I wear, I promise to post a photo here.)

Friday fun en femme

(updated below)

I went out en femme yesterday.

It decided to go out at the last minute. My week long eye problem started clearing up midday on Thursday and was completely gone when I woke up yesterday, so I called work, told the boss I was taking a vacation day, then I dressed to go out. I wore my real estate agent drag ensemble (white top, black slacks, pink suit jacket, and black booties).

I was on the road at 9 AM and my first stop was Contessa Corset Shop in West Hartford. It was a "pig in a poke" selection.

Since Irene's closed in New Britain, I have been looking for another local trans-friendly store to buy foundation garments. A lot of the local girls recommended Princess Lingerie Shop in Waterbury, but I am leery about driving around my old hometown en femme where I still have a lot of friends, relatives, and acquaintances, who are familiar with my car and its Amateur Radio call sign license plates. So, I searched online for another local store and the closest one was Contessa Corset Shop.

I did not call ahead to make an appointment because my decision to go out was a last minute thing. I had no idea how I would be treated. Well, I have good news: I was treated like a lady by the saleswoman named Brenda. She helped me find what I needed, made suggestions on other options, and was genuinely happy to have me as a customer. By the way, her prices were reasonable and comparable to online prices.

As I was leaving, I asked if I could recommend her store to my trans-friends and she said she would be happy to have more customers like me.

Next stop was West Farms Mall in Farmington. First stop in the mall was Sephora. My powder foundation is almost gone and since its manufacturer is also gone, I wanted to find something comparable.

A saleswoman greeted me and helped me find a comparable powder foundation. As I was checking out, I asked the saleswoman how much they charged for makeovers. She replied that makeovers were "free," but that all the cosmeticians were in a training class. She suggested that I could come back later in the day or make an appointment for a makeover on another day.

My next goal was to find a long lightweight sweater coat like the one Patty lent me for my week at Fantasia Fair. I browsed through a few store looking for a similar coat without success.

While in JCPenney, I browsed their dress department and found three dresses and two skirts that I liked. I took them to the dressing room and tried them on. Everything fit fine, but I only liked the look of two dresses and the one skirt on me. I purchased the three items.

The skirt is a long bias-cut A-line from east5th in red/polar bear plaid. The hem is at my mid-calf and will look great with boots.

One dress is a cute black cap-sleeve babydoll from B. Smart decorated with black buttons accenting its scoop neckline and pockets. It is lightly pleated below the collar and its hem is above the knee. It will look great in black tights and my black patent high heel Mary Janes.

The other dress is very '60s retro from Worthington. It is a simple dark gray short-sleeve A-line with metallic silver threads in the fabric. The collar makes it so retro; a curved piece with a gray button on each end (see my drawing of the collar). The hem falls above my knees and will look good with off-black hose and a pair of dressy heels.

(Sorry, but there are no photos of the dresses on the JCPenney Web site, so you have to put up with my rough descriptions and drawings.)

JCPenney had a sale, so the three items cost $98 vs. their list price of $188, which was a nice savings (and my last of the day).

I decided to take my purchases to my car, then continue shopping. But by the time I walked to the other end of the mall where my car was parked, my feet needed a break. As I passed Sephora again, I noticed that they were not too busy, so I decided to cool my heels while getting a makeover.

A cosmetician sat me at a makeover kiosk right near the entrance of the store and began working her magic on my face. (Being so strategically located, I had an audience throughout the makeover.) The transformation was amazing. I was very impressed by a product she used that shrank and smoothed out the bags under my eyes, which subtracted years from my visage. I bought a lot of the products that she used, so much so that I qualified for some "free" gifts.

My "free" makeover was hardly free, but I was very happy with the results and received a few appreciative glances as I exited the mall and walked to my car. (I really regretted not bringing a camera yesterday.)

My week-long bout with the allergy was taking its toll; I was tired and ready to call it quits for the day, but I wanted to show off my makeover one more time. So I decided to visit Dress Barn across the street from the mall and size up what they had to offer in anticipation of our party there next month.

After my spending spree at Contessa, Sephora, and JCPenney, I had no intention of buying anything at Dress Barn; I just wanted to familiarize myself with their offerings, but as I walked into the store, a dress on display in the window caught my eye. An overcoat over the dress hid a lot of it, but it still looked very attractive.

I entered the store and lifted the overcoat to see the rest of the dress. It was gorgeous, but the display model was too small and I did not see the dress on a rack in the immediate vicinity. So, I proceeded to look through the store and saw a lot of nice things that I noted to check out more closely during our Dress Barn party next month.

During my tour of the store, I did find a rack with three copies of the dress I saw in the window display. The largest of the three was a size 16. I examined it and I concluded that it was too small in the shoulder and bust area. I sighed as I hung it back on the rack.

I continued touring the store and just as I was about to leave, I returned to "the dress" and decided to try it on. What did I have to lose?

It fit like the proverbial glove and I had to buy it even though it was not on sale. With only four in the store and only one in my size, how likely would there still be one available a month later? I did get a 10% discount by signing up for a Dress Barn credit card.

The dress is a Sandra Darren black sleeveless mesh dress. Over the mesh are silver and gold vertical stripes that look like ribbons covering the length of the dress. Underneath the mesh is a black full slip with spaghetti straps. A black ribbon belt cinches the waist. Its hem falls below my knees. And did I say, it fits like a glove?

It is so classy; a very nice cocktail or holiday party dress. I'll probably wear it with black hose and my faux suede high heel platform pumps.

With that purchase and my credit card going down in flames, I decided to call it a day en femme... another wonderful day en femme.

UPDATE: I found this photo of a vintage '60s dress that has a collar similar to the one on the dress I bought at JCPenney.

borrowing

My best friend Patty offered to lend me some things for Fantasia Fair, so yesterday, I took a long lunch to visit her and see what she had to offer.

In addition to providing an excellent lunch (soup, salad, and freshly baked bread), she presented me with a half dozen outfits, coats, and jewelry that I could borrow. The outfits included beautiful formal and semi-formal dresses and a pants outfit. The coats came in an array of colors and styles.

I hauled my haul home and tried everything on today. Two of the dresses fit perfectly including my favorite of the bunch: a long beaded grayish-blue sleeveless crochet dress that I now plan to wear to one of the Fantasia Fair banquets. The other dress that fit was a long black velvet dress with see-through short sleeves and I plan to wear it out to dinner at Fantasia Fair. The other dresses and the pants outfit were lovely, too, but they were too tight in the chest, so I will not be packing them for the trip to Provincetown.

The coats all fit and I will be taking a selection of them to Fantasia Fair and the jewelry accessorizes the beaded dress, so that will be coming along for the ride, too.

Thank you so much for your generosity, Patty!

a world where men can wear skirts

Catherine Price writes here that "Maybe a time will come when one of my oldest fashion grievances -- that it's OK for women to wear pants, but demeaning for a man to wear 'female' clothing -- will be laid to rest."

be size myself

My Newport-News order arrived yesterday.

The black patent Mary Janes were lovely and fit. The dresses did not and I returned them today for a refund.

I ordered both dresses in my size du jour (16) and nine out of ten times, 16 works, but this time, 16 was too small.

I did not bother exchanging them for a larger size because one dress was sold out in size 18 and the other was so small in size 16 that I was not sure that even a size 18 would fit.

I was very disappointed.

Sizing is always an issue when buying clothing online or via mail order. It is a crap shoot in which I can accept inconsistent sizing when you buy from different stores, but inconsistent sizing from the same store is inexcusable.

It is very frustrating and causes me to consider swearing off future online/mail order purchases.

a little online shopping

Yesterday, my daily e-mail from Newport-News informed me that they were having a dress sale and shipping was free if your order was at least $75. I could do that, so I rushed to their Web site and did some shopping.

Like Joe McCarthy, I was on the hunt for reds and found two that I liked, as well as a pair of red Mary Janes that were also on sale. After consulting with Patty, my fashion consultant, I got her thumbs up and went back online to order my choices, a scoopneck dress with fitted bodice and full, pleated skirt (a classic "Staci dress") and a "sophisticated" red floral-print shirtdress.

By the time I got back online to place my order, the scoopneck dress and shoes were no longer available in my size. Patty advised me to wait and they might return later in the day.

I started working on a Plan B for the red shoes and went to the Payless Web site to see what they had in red.

I hit pay dirt! They had an "online exclusive" on a pair of red platform pumps for $13.99. They also had the same shoe in black and white two tone for the same price. I ordered both.

Back to Newport-News and hour later and the dress was back in my size again, but the shoes were not. Since I had implemented Plan B for the red shoe, I was not concerned about that. But my order was still $21 short of free shipping, so I ordered the same shoes in black patent, which was still available in my size. Like Patty said, "The black patent are a staple and should be in everyone's closet." Soon, they will be in mine.

window shopping

stranger than fictionmania*

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four dresses

Spiegel's online catalog has four dresses that I like. They are just my style and I think they would look good on me.
Currently, they cost $60, $100, $60, and $19, respectively.

I would buy the $19 dress in a New York minute, but it is a clearance item and is only available in size 4!

I will wait and perhaps someday soon the others will become clearance items in my size.

random thoughts on Tuesday

The top five phrases that cause search engines to send searchers to this blog are femulate, fictionmania, kate salehurst, katesalehurst, and dresses for men.

• femulate is self-explanatory


• fictionmania is a web site mentioned here a few times. It is an online repository for crossdressing fiction.


• kate salehurst, katesalehurst is a beautiful trans-woman, who I mentioned here once or twice


• dresses for men is intriguing. Is it an indication that non-trans-people are looking for dresses for men? Are non-trans-males adding dresses to their wardrobe? Are women searching for dresses for their men?

***

I am going out en femme Wednesday evening, primarily to attend my support group's final meeting before the group’s two-month summer hiatus. Before the meeting, I also plan to go shopping. There is a DSW Shoe Warehouse that I must check out and Dress Barn is across the street!