Overdresser

I am an overdresser.

There ― I admitted it. I got it off my chest and now I don't have to worry about people accusing me of being an "overdresser" because I have come out to the world about it.

It is hard to overdress when you attend a trans support group meeting; many of the attendees overdress because the meeting may be their only opportunity to dress at all, so they dress to kill.

That being said, when I attended trans support group meetings, I was usually the most overdressed girl at the meeting. Hands down. No question about it.

I carried on my overdressing when I began going out among civilians en femme. The woman in a cocktail dress and high heels shopping at Walmart ― that was me. The woman in the sequin evening gown seated in the centerfield bleachers at Fenway Park ― that was me. The woman in the little black dress and pearls dining at Taco Bell ― you guessed it ― that was me, too.

At first, I worried about it because overdressing drew attention to me and by drawing attention to me, civilians might scrutinize me too closely and figure out that I was packing something extra underneath my periwinkle bridesmaid gown.

I sure did not want to out myself, so I began toning it down. But I soon found out that toned-down dressing was Boring with a capital B!

Blending in with all the other babes at Home Depot was just not my thing. I wanted to be outstanding in my field in heels, not flats.

So, I began overdressing again and I have never looked back because in the words of blogger Kate Fridkis, "Being overdressed is fun. You have to pull it off with confidence. You have to walk with your shoulders back, like you planned it. Like you're dressed up because you live a dramatic, impressive life. I mean, why not? Maybe you do."

Ms. Fridkis' "The Art of Overdressing" on The Huffington Post inspired this post and I urge you to go read it yourself; maybe it will inspire you to buy a red strapless dress to wear to AutoZone.

Wearing Rachel Zoe (Source: Rachel Zoe)

Trevor Moore femulating on television's The Whitest Kids U' Know.

I Blend

You may recall that three weeks ago, I had a free dinner date courtesy of Prudential Financial. Stanley was invited and she attended dressed appropriately for a woman her age.

At the banquet hall, each attendee was assigned to a specific table and each table had a Prudential representative seated with the guests. The rep introduced himself and was available to field questions, if any. It was all very laid-back and there was no high pressure sales.

A week later, I received a call on my iPhone. I did not recognize the number, so I did not answer it. I received a second call from the same number a week later and another on Friday.

Over the weekend, I finally noticed that there were two voicemails left after the last two calls. I listened to the voicemails and they were from the Prudential rep seated at our table offering his financial services if I was interested.

He did mention in passing that either I was a no-show at the dinner or I ended up sitting at the wrong table!

There were three couples and two solos (me and a guy) seated at our table. Perhaps the rep thought I was with the wife or girlfriend of the solo guy even though we were not seated together. I also assume he was looking for a male Stanley at his table, not the lady Stanley, who was present.

I guess I blend in better than I thought.

Wearing Derek Lam 10 Crosby sweater, Rejina Pyo skirt, Tibi boots and Yuzefi bag (Source: Intermix)

John Crawford femulating in the 1961 British film The Impersonator.

Experience the Difference

Starla sent another batch of femulating fotos she uncovered from various online school yearbooks.

There were some excellent femulations in this batch, but the one that interested me the most was Steven White's Marilyn Monroe Halloween femulation at Episcopal School of Dallas (Texas) in 2003.

For starters, the photo shows Steven posing next to a girl in the same Marilyn Monroe costume, but I am not sure which Marilyn is Steven and which Marilyn is the girl, so good job, Steven!

Secondly, Steven's commentary on the experience is refreshing; you can read it for yourself to the right.

You may view the rest of Starla's new photos on flickr by opening one of my flickr Yearbooks sets (A through Z). There you will find the newest uploads at the end/bottom of the set. (The oldest uploads appear at the beginning/top of the set.)

The contents of the Yearbook A through Z sets are organized according to school name, for example, the photos from Sacred Heart High School would be in the Yearbooks S set.

By the way, if you participated in your school's womanless beauty pageant or attended some other school activity en femme, I would love to post your photos along with any description you would like to provide. (No one has taken me up on this offer, so far, but I am still hopeful and very patient!)

Thought for the Day

“It took me many years to accept, to fully internalize that if someone can look at me and tell I’m trans, that’s not only okay—that’s beautiful, because trans is beautiful.” — Laverne Cox (source: HuffPost)

Wearing Venus (source: Venus)

Three gurls and four guys, circa 1960

Dress to Blend vs. Dress to Empress

Yesterday, I received an e-mail noting that I overdress and suggesting that I should dress to blend in with the other ladies. To support this suggestion, the e-mailer added that when Kate Middleton is off duty, she wears jeans and sneakers. I never denied that I overdress and replied, "Kate Middleton is only a princess, so she can get away with jeans and sneakers. But I am a queen and must dress like a queen all of the time!"

 

 

 

Wearing Time’s Arrow bag.

 

 

 

Navy hero Don Winslow femulates in this February 1944 installment of his daily comic strip.

I don't blend and I don't care

Many wise transwomen recommend blending if you are trying to pass.

The theory says that if you dress like the other women in the environment you plan to be in, that is, if you blend in with the other women, you will lessen the chances of bringing attention to yourself, thus increasing the chances of successfully passing yourself off as a woman.

For example, if you are going grocery shopping, then jeans and a top would be your choice of apparel for blending in most places.

I have tried blending and it seems to work, but blending is boring. When I dress en femme, I want to dress EN FEMME, if you know what I mean. I dress to be noticed not to be ignored. If I wanted to be ignored, I'd dress en homme.

As Lucille Sorella wrote recently in her Feminization Secrets blog, "As a genetic woman, the last thing I want to do is blend in! I wear makeup, style my hair, and dress fashionably because I want to stand out in a crowd. I believe it’s a natural feminine desire to want to be noticed."

As a transwoman, I feel the same way.

And perchance I have to go to Stop & Shop to buy a few items while I am en femme, I just think of myself as another working girl dressed appropriately for the office, but overdressed for grocery shopping during her lunch hour or on her way home from the office.

Works for me.