How often have you heard older transwomen say that they wished they were growing up today? I have said it many times myself.
Actually, I enjoyed growing up when I did. The only reason for wishing I grew up today is that there is a huge body of accessible knowledge about transgender folks that did not exist when I was young. Back then, all I had to go by was one sentence in our family's encyclopedia that mentioned transvestism.
I had no idea why I crossdressed. All I knew was that I liked it, but was ashamed of it and told no one about it. My shame and guilt convinced me that what I was doing was very wrong and that I would go straight to Hell (do not pass go) when I died. So I made up my mind to confess my big "sin" the next time I went to confession.
Since I went to a Catholic high school, that opportunity presented itself quite regularly. So the next time our class marched to church for confession, I will never forget how nervous I was. But I had made up my mind and when I entered the confessional I was read to spill the beans to be absolved and never crossdress again.
I quickly confessed my venial sins, but I just could not confess my big one. After I hemmed and hawed for awhile, the priest figured out that something was up. He said that if I had a sin that I was too embarrassed to confess that all I had to do was admit to that fact and he would absolve me.
What a deal! He was offering me a free pass! But I was so embarrassed that I did not take him up on his offer and I left the confessional with my big sin still weighing me down.
Actors Richard Deacon and Adam West femulating
in the 1980 film The Happy Hooker Goes Hollywood.
Wearing Basix.
