The Bathroom Tissue

Past Lives

Some crossdressers believe they were female in a past life—a belief that blends gender identity, spiritual tradition, and personal intuition. While not universal, this idea is meaningful for those who feel a deep, inexplicable connection to femininity that they say goes beyond psychology or social influence.

Spiritual and Metaphysical Foundations

Many of these beliefs stem from spiritual systems that accept reincarnation or past-life memory, such as:

Hinduism and Buddhism, where the soul is believed to reincarnate across lifetimes, potentially changing gender with each cycle.

New Age spirituality, where regression therapy, hypnosis, or meditative journeys are used to "uncover" past lives.

Western esotericism, which often includes ideas of soul essence transcending gender.

In this context, a crossdresser might say, “I don't dress like a woman because I want to be one—I'm remembering who I was.”

Psychological Resonance

Some crossdressers report that feminine behavior, clothing and social roles feel instantly familiar, comforting or even inevitable, as if they are returning to something already known.

They may:

Gravitate toward vintage styles from specific eras (e.g., 1940s housewives, Victorian ladies) they have no personal experience of.

Feel distress or confusion living as male, which lessens when presenting femininely—seen not as a fetish, but as alignment with their “true” past self.

Report childhood dreams or vivid fantasies that feel more like memories than imagination.

Expression Through Crossdressing

For these individuals, crossdressing is not merely about gender play or sexual excitement—it’s a spiritual or emotional homecoming.

They might:

Create a female persona that they believe mirrors their former self.

Talk about “her” in third person while still embodying her through dress and behavior.

Feel peaceful or complete only when living in sync with this past-life identity.

Crossdressing, then, becomes a kind of soul retrieval or incarnation echo—a way of honoring a former existence.

Criticisms and Cautions

Not everyone embraces these beliefs and even within crossdressing and trans communities, such claims can be met with skepticism. Critics point out:

The difficulty of verifying past lives,

The possibility of romanticizing femininity as an escape,

Or the use of metaphysical language to rationalize crossdressing without confronting present-life gender issues.

That said, for many who feel deeply called to femininity, believing in a past-life identity offers validation and comfort, particularly if their current life restricts full gender expression.

Wearing Paige

Tommy Scott femulating in Space's music video for “Begin Again.”
Click here to view this video on YouTube.

Our Culture

The culture around femulating is rich, affirming and evolving—a vibrant intersection of gender expression, personal identity and community. Unlike casual crossdressing or drag performance, femulating represents a lifestyle and mindset where male-bodied individuals present and live as women in everyday settings, sometimes part-time, sometimes full-time.

Here’s a breakdown of the cultural elements surrounding femulating.

Aspirational Femininity

Femulating isn’t just about putting on clothes—it’s about emulating womanhood as completely as possible. This includes:

    Feminine gestures, posture and vocal tone

    Wearing age-appropriate women’s clothing, often business or social attire

    Adopting traditionally female hobbies, roles and social behaviors

    Using female names and pronouns during presentation

Rather than parody or exaggeration (like drag), it aims for realistic and respectful embodiment.

Everyday Womanhood

Femulators often integrate into daily life as women—shopping, dining out, traveling, attending church or work (when possible). It’s a way of life that affirms:

    Confidence: “Going out en femme” is a personal triumph over fear.

    Validation: Positive public interactions help reinforce the identity.

    Routine: Makeup, hair and feminine dress become habitual rather than special-occasion.

Femulating can transform from “crossdressing” into just dressing.

Learning and Mentorship

Femulators often learn from:

    Other femulators, especially older ones who’ve paved the way

    Online resources: blogs, YouTube tutorials, makeover studios

    Historical inspiration: Classic film stars (e.g., Joan Crawford, Grace Kelly) are icons

    Trial and error: Mistakes in appearance or voice become lessons in the journey

There’s an oral and visual tradition of transformation tips, often generously shared.

Community

Femulating thrives in supportive peer groups, both online and in-person.

    Meetups: Formal events like Fantasia Fair or Esprit or informal dinners or teas

    Online forums: Reddit’s r/crossdressing, TransPulse, or blogs like Femulate.org

    Social media: Many femulators post selfies, routines, and “out and about” photos

These communities offer affirmation, feedback, and connection—crucial for confidence.

Intersection with Identity

While not all femulators identify as transgender, the line between femulating and transitioning is often porous.

    Some femulators eventually come out as trans women

    Others view it as a dual-gender lifestyle

    Some are heterosexual males expressing a profound feminine side without altering gender     identity

There’s space for ambiguity and self-definition.

Fashion and Ritual

Femulating carries its own aesthetic culture.

    Office lady chic, classic skirt-suits, hosiery and heels are mainstays

    Many embrace “mature femininity” modeling after stylish middle-aged women

    Lingerie, shapewear and the ritual of dressing are central to the experience

    Shopping (especially in person) becomes a rite of passage

Femulating isn’t just a look—it’s a performance of grace, often tied to nostalgia for “ladylike” elegance.

Philosophy and Meaning

Many femulators describe the practice as:

    Spiritually centering or emotionally soothing

    A liberation from rigid masculinity

    A way to connect with empathy, softness, and beauty

    An act of gender defiance or private truth-telling

Some find deep peace and authenticity when they’re in femme mode, even if only temporarily.

And so it goes.

Source: Rent the Runway

Libor Landa femulating in the Czech Republic film Kamenak.

Stana Short

Short hemlines are synonymous with crossdressers for a few interrelated cultural, psychological and historical reasons.

Hyperfeminization

Crossdressers often aim to emphasize femininity, sometimes in exaggerated or idealized ways. Short skirts, high heels and revealing clothing are stereotypically feminine and have long been seen as bold symbols of womanhood.

Short hemlines equals instant visual femininity. A mini skirt leaves no ambiguity—it screams “female presentation” in a way jeans or modest dresses don't.

Sexual Expression and Taboo

For many crossdressers, dressing is tied to exploration fantasy, and sometimes eroticism. Short skirts play into this:

Tantalizing and transgressive

Wearing a short skirt, especially as a man socialized under traditional norms, feels daring and taboo—adding to the thrill.

Visibility and display

A short hem makes the transformation more obvious, almost performative.

Media and Pop Culture Influence

Crossdressers in films, drag shows and viral videos are often shown in ultra-feminine outfits—tight, short and eye-catching. Think: Tootsie, RuPaul’s Drag Race, Halloween costumes or drag brunches.

These depictions shape public and private imagination about “what crossdressing looks like.”

Affirmation and Identity

A short skirt may feel like a badge of courage, especially for someone asserting a non-masculine identity in a society that polices male dress:

“If I can wear this, I can wear anything.”

The exposure is both literal and metaphorical—revealing and affirming.

Missed Youth / Fashion Catch-Up

Some crossdressers begin dressing later in life, having been denied the chance to wear what girls wore as teens or young women. Mini skirts are often seen as “young girl clothes”—so some crossdressers are, in a sense, dressing their inner teenager. It’s a way of reclaiming missed experiences or indulging in a “second adolescence.”

Visibility Within the Community

Within crossdressing spaces—support groups, meetups, online communities—short skirts are part of a shared visual language. They signal membership, boldness, and pride.

“If you’ve got the legs for it… flaunt it.”

This Girl Can’t Help It!

Some if not all of the preceding reasons can apply to me, but the main reason my hemlines are too short is that my legs are too long! At my height, hemlines that are supposed to fall at the knee, fall above the knee on me. Similarly, dresses with hemlines above the knee are mid-thigh on me or “Stana Short.”

Yes, they do sell clothing for tall women, but the selection is limited and the styles are not my style. On the other hand, the styles at the middle of the height spectrum are limitless. This girl can always find something she likes and just has to endure a shorter than normal hemline (wink, wink).

Wearing Alice + Olivia

Sid Silvers femulating in the film Broadway Melody of 1936.

The Femulators of Flamingo Court

Every Wednesday at 10 a.m. sharp, the retired men of Flamingo Court gathered at the community center for coffee, stale danish and intense games of competitive grumbling.

They were proud old-school gents—gray slacks, orthopedic shoes and enough nasal hair to knit a throw blanket. Their leader, by sheer volume and mustache alone, was Stanley, a former insurance adjuster known affectionately (and loudly) as “Stanley the Manley.”

But Stanley had a secret.

When not playing backgammon or lecturing teenagers on proper lawn mower etiquette, Stanley was Stana—a proud femulator with a passion for pencil skirts, floral blouses and reading Vogue while eating frosted mini-wheats.

One day, he arrived late to the meeting wearing suspiciously well-shaped eyebrows and a hint of shimmer on his cheekbones.

“Stanley,” grunted Arnie, peering over his bifocals, “you’re looking… glossy.”

“New moisturizer,” Stanley lied, sipping his coffee with pinky extended. “Also, I’ve discovered something that may change our lives.”

“Is it a blood pressure medication that doesn’t cause spontaneous naps?”

“No,” Stanley said, standing dramatically. “It’s femulating.”

The room fell silent.

“Femulating?” asked Donny, who still called Netflix “the internet movie box.”

“Yes,” Stanley beamed. “It’s the art of dressing and behaving like a refined lady of culture. And I happen to be… quite good at it.”

He whipped off his blazer to reveal a flowing lavender blouse with pearl buttons.

Murray dropped his cruller.

Arnie clutched his chest—not from offense, but from the sudden realization that Stanley’s shoes were really cute.

“I know it sounds wild,” Stanley said, fluffing his short auburn wig, “but being Stana is the most relaxed, confident, fabulous I’ve ever felt. And I think all of you could use a little… zhuzh.”

There was a long pause.

Then Donny mumbled, “I’ve always wanted to try one of those silky robe things.”

By the following Wednesday, something miraculous had happened.

The Flamingo Court Gentlemen’s Club was now The Flamingo Femulators’ Fellowship.

Gone were the gray slacks and orthopedic monotony. In their place: scarves, cardigans, tasteful jewelry and surprisingly decent contouring skills for men with tremors.

Arnie became Arlene, known for her statement brooches and uncanny ability to walk in kitten heels with a walker.

Donny became Dawn, and insisted on being called “Madame Treasurer” while managing the snack fund.

Murray, now Marlene, wore bold lipstick and refused to answer to anything else.

They took a field trip to the mall in a minivan blaring ABBA. They started a book club that only read romance novels with shirtless pirates. They got kicked out of bingo night for “excessive sass and feather boa shedding.”

And Stanley? He stood at the center of it all, hands on hips, pearls shining, proud as a peacock in a paisley pantsuit.

“Gentlemen,” he declared one Thursday during tea, “we have not lost our manhood. We have simply… accessorized it.”

And nobody ever went back.

Except Frank. Frank tried to, but came crawling back after two days in khakis, muttering, “I miss the breeze under a skirt.”

The Flamingo Femulators had found their calling. And their signature shade of lipstick: “Sunset Sangria.”

Wearing Ann Taylor

Bartek Kasprzykowski imitating Eugeniusz Bodo femulating Mae West on Polish television’s Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo.

Stuff 78: Dream Outfits

By J.J. Atwell

What is a “dream outfit”?

Remember the movie Dream Girls? It came out in 2006 and was loosely based on the Motown girl group The Supremes. Growing up, I loved The Supremes and their lead singer Diana Ross when she went out on her own. I’m not sure what I loved more, the music or the outfits they wore. That leads me to today’s topic about dream outfits.

What to you mean “dream outfit”? I’m defining it as that dress you lust for. The one you saw on a woman in the street, in a picture or on the big screen or perhaps on a red carpet award show. Actually, it doesn’t have to be a dress. It could be any great looking outfit. Something you really want to try on just to see how you look in it.

What would be your dream outfit?

From trolling the typical CD sites, I see many interested in wedding dresses or fancy prom style dresses. I’ll say that I do love the thought of those. Especially if they would look good on my (enhanced) body. But for this exercise, don’t worry about reality. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have to have that perfect body for this exercise. 

So let’s hear it. How about a cheerleader outfit? French maid? 50’s housewife? Square dance girl? A slutty streetwalker? Lots of stereotypes we could fashion ourselves after. I’ll admit that some of those are interesting, but others seem to be offensive to me. Should we include outfits that basically denigrate women? A tough call.

Do you actually have a dream outfit?

So how many of you really have that dream outfit in your closet. Or better yet, have worn it out in the real world. 

My answer to those two questions is “no.” I don’t have my dream outfit, so I haven’t worn it out in the real world either. I will say that my dream outfit would probably be something slinky, probably red sequined and glittery shoes to go with it. 

I’ll be back

I’ll be back with more Stuff for sure. Comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff so let me know what you would like to read about.

Wearing Cinq à Sept

Glenn Shadix femulating on television's The Golden Girls.

The Boys Are Back In Gowns

 

Happy Independence Day!

Wearing Claudie Pierlot

Actors playing femulating Army men in the 1943 film This Is the Army.
Click here to watch the film on YouTube.

Full-Time

Crossdressers who live full-time as women often exist in a unique space between traditional crossdressing and transgender identity. While every individual’s journey is different, here’s a thoughtful look at this group—sometimes referred to as full-time crossdressers, transfeminine non-transitioners or nonbinary feminine-presenting men—depending on their self-identification.

Who Are They?

These are individuals who were assigned male at birth, identify (often but not always) as male or nonbinary, but choose to present and live full-time in feminine clothing, roles and appearance—without necessarily undergoing medical or legal transition.

They may live as “ladies” socially, professionally or domestically. Some still use he/him pronouns; others prefer she/her or they/them. They may or may not consider themselves transgender.

Why Live Full-Time as Female?

Feminine Identity Feels Natural – They feel more themselves in skirts, makeup and heels. Their mannerisms, speech and behavior align more with traditionally feminine roles.

Comfort in Routine – Rather than limiting femininity to evenings or weekends, full-time presentation allows them to settle into a consistent life—a wardrobe, a name and social identity that doesn’t change back and forth.

Emotional Fulfillment – Living as a woman full-time often brings peace, joy and a sense of wholeness, especially if masculine roles always felt like performance.

Role Models and Affirmation _ Supportive partners or matriarchal communities may encourage or even expect full-time feminine presentation.

Lifestyle and Presentation

Full-time crossdressers usually adopt feminine names (sometimes playful or stylized)

Daily routines that include skincare, makeup, hairstyling, voice softening or feminine speech patterns

A curated wardrobe with business, casual, and occasion wear

Some may even work in feminine roles, such as salon assistants, receptionists, boutique clerks or technical writers.

Identity vs. Transition

This lifestyle does not always equal a desire to transition medically or legally. Some explicitly say, “I don’t want to be a woman. I just want to live as one.” Others may be testing the waters of transition, finding out if they feel fully aligned with womanhood or if a middle path suits them best.

How Do They Fit Into Society?

Some are out and proud, living openly with acceptance from friends, family and co-workers. While others live stealthily, especially in more conservative environments, using feminine names and appearance while avoiding questions.

They may participate in crossdresser clubs, matriarchal households or online support groups.

In some cultures, such individuals are expected to adopt full-time feminine presentation, especially after retirement or marriage.

Real-Life Experiences

A retired husband who becomes “the lady of the house,” dressing in soft blouses and attending garden club meetings.

A younger man who is mentored by older feminized “aunties” in how to carry himself as a lady in a matriarchal social setting.

Working professionals who re-enter the workforce as “Miss Robin” or “Mrs. Stana,” presenting entirely as female while still technically male on paper.

Challenges

Judgment or misunderstanding from both cis and trans communities

Legal name/document mismatch

Voice dysphoria or body discomfort

Struggles with acceptance from family

Internal questioning: “Am I just feminine or am I truly trans?”

In Summary

Full-time crossdressers blur the lines between gender roles, blending aesthetics, identity and lifestyle into something personal and deeply meaningful. They may not seek to “become women” in the medical or legal sense, but instead embrace a feminine way of life—gracefully, beautifully and on their own terms.

Wearing Ann Taylor

Dávid Hartl femulating Ariana Grande on Polish television’s Tvoja Tvar Anie Povedome.
Click here to view this amazing femulation on YouTube.

Making Up: The Rest of the Story

Yesterday's post described how to make up your eyes. Here’s a detailed and easy-to-follow guide for applying makeup to the rest of the face, specifically tailored for girls like us aiming to feminize and soften masculine features.

Prep Your Skin

Cleanse and moisturize: Start with clean, moisturized skin. I cannot recommend moisturizer enough and recommend using it everyday even if you are not being a girl that day.

Shaving Tip: A close shave is key (I use a gel shaving cream with a multi-blade razor). Follow with a soothing, non-greasy moisturizer or aftershave balm.

Primer (optional, but I always use primer): Use a smoothing or pore-filling primer to create a clean canvas and reduce the appearance of texture or beard shadow.

Color Correction (Especially for Beard Shadow)

Use a peach or orange corrector:

Dab a peach corrector over blue/gray beard shadow or orange for deeper complexions.

Blend with a sponge or fingers. This step cancels out unwanted tones before foundation.

(I used a corrector in my youth, but no longer use it because my beard is nearly white and does not shadow.)

Foundation

Choose the right shade: Match to your neck and chest for a seamless blend.

Application:

Use a sponge or foundation brush. (I use a liquid foundation, so a sponge is my application tool.)

Start in the center of the face and blend outward.

Build up in thin layers for more coverage where needed (like beard area).

Concealer

Use a lighter concealer under the eyes.

Blend well with a sponge or brush.

Setting Powder

Lightly dust translucent powder over your face to set your base and prevent shine.

Press powder into the beard area to reduce texture and set coverage.

Use a smaller brush under the eyes or jawline for extra definition, if desired.

Contour and Highlight (Face Shaping!)

Contour (for a softer, oval face shape):

Use a cool-toned brown powder or cream.

Apply under cheekbones, along the jawline, sides of the nose, and temples.

Blend thoroughly for natural shadowing.

Highlight:

Use a soft shimmer or light matte highlighter on cheekbones, brow bones, bridge of nose and cupid’s bow.

Blush

Adds warmth and femininity.

Apply to the apples of the cheeks and sweep slightly upward toward the temples.

Go for soft pinks, peaches or mauves depending on your skin tone.

Lips

Prep: Exfoliate and moisturize.

Lip Liner: Define your lip shape—overline slightly if desired for a fuller look. Use a well-sharpened lip liner pencil starting the line at the middle of the lip and work outwards to the end of the lip line following the curve of my natural lip line

Lipstick or Gloss:

Choose a flattering shade (rosy pinks, mauves or nudes are good everyday options).

Gloss or satin finishes can feminize the lips more than mattes.

Use a lipstick brush to apply the lipstick. A brush provides better coverage where you want the color and avoids putting color where you don't want it.

Close your mouth on a piece of tissue paper to remove any excess, then apply a light coat of translucent powder on your lips (this will hold the color for a longer period of time).



Reapply or touch up your lip liner, then reapply your lipstick. Apply lip gloss if desired (sometimes I do, but usually I don’t).

Pro Tip: Lighter and shinier lips often look more feminine and youthful.

Finishing Touches

Setting spray: Mist your face to lock everything in and soften the powdery look.

Check in natural light: Always look at your finished face in daylight or near a window—it reveals any unblended spots.

Extra Feminizing Tips

Jawline: Softly contour under the jaw to minimize squareness.

Nose: Narrow a broader nose with subtle side contouring and a highlight on the bridge.

Forehead: Contour at the temples can visually lower a higher brow ridge.

Be pretty!

Wearing StyleWe

Richard Chamberlain femulating on television’s The Drew Carey Show.