Not One of the Guys

Attending Hamvention in 2012 was my third time doing it en femme, so I was still getting used to mixing with a crowd of civilians that was predominantly male.

Friday morning of Hamvention, I went to the hotel restaurant for breakfast. There I met another board member and his wife, who I had not seen since the previous Hamvention a year earlier, so we hugged and caught up on the past year.



While I was eating and chatting, I noticed a group of guys at the next table checking me out. Finally, one of the guys got up and came to our table, excused himself and asked me, “Did you ever live in Annapolis?”



“No, I've never been in Annapolis, why do you ask?”



“You look just like the sister of a friend of mine from Annapolis. Sorry to bother you.”



“No problem.”

That was an auspicious way to start the day!



That evening was my group’s annual banquet. Arriving at the banquet hall to get the show on the road, some attendees (about 20) were already in attendance, so we needed to collect their tickets. While another board member manned the entrance to collect tickets from new arrivals, I volunteered to collect tickets from those already in attendance. Almost all of them were strangers and it was a very telling experience.



Most of the board members (all guys) have known me for 10 years or more. They call me by my femme name most of the time, flub pronouns some of the time and still treat me “like one of the guys” all of the time.



So there I am en femme decked out in a dress and peep-toe slingback 4-inch heels (see photo) collecting tickets from 20 strangers – almost all of them were male and they most definitely did not treat me like “one of the guys.” Instead, they were very polite and respectful and some of them were actually very cute in the way they interacted with me. They also got the pronouns right. I don't think I ever felt more womanly than I did when I collected the tickets.



After that experience, I became more aware of how strangers interacted with me during Hamvention. In general, woman smiled that smile which indicates that they acknowledge you as a member of their club. And men were overly polite. It became obvious that they thought I was a woman and not one of the guys.

Wearing Venus

Pretty Christine