Old Joke but…
You know the old joke, “When is a door not a door?” And the answer of course is, “When it’s a jar.” OK, I can hear the groans. But today I’d like to talk about making that door not just ajar, but kicking it wide open.
How out are you?
I know that Stana has lots of people that read her page regularly. No doubt some of you are at various levels of comfort when being out dressed. That is if you are even comfortable enough to go out of the house dressed. All I can say is that you are in control of your life and are the one that must make the decision to step out.
Making the decision to go out of the house is intimidating. We imagine all kinds of issues that we may encounter. We build them up in our mind until we convince ourselves that it’s too dangerous or difficult to go out in public. So we wait for a better time. And we wait. And we wait. Before you know it, you’re in your 70’s and still haven’t stepped out of the house.
Taking that big step
Somehow you’ve finally decided to just do it. Yes, a bold step, but you got yourself there. There will be lots of second thoughts popping into your head. Many excuses as to why today is not the right day. Push them aside. Stand by your decision to go out. Don’t let the doubts deprive you of a major accomplishment in your life.
Stepping out of that door is an exhilarating experience. It is also scary. But the scary part gets easier and easier the more you do it. The exhilaration doesn’t go away. Enjoy yourself. That door is no longer a jar.
I’ll be back
Yes, there will be more Stuff. As always, comments are welcome either here on the blog or by email to Jenn6nov at-sign gmail dot com. JJ is always looking for more stuff, so if there is something you would like to read about please let me know!
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| Wearing JustFab |
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| Steve Landesberg femulating on television’s Barney Miller. |
My first time out was for a birthday party of my then romantic partner as a 'dare' (that we both knew they would win - it was mainly for them to have bragging rights within their group of friends that they could make me, well-known as the most straight-laced boring oddball of the group, femulate). That cover would be utilised almost 18 months later in a different situation to femulate (a bit, I've shared that time with Stana's readers before, and I was in deep disguise in those days, so my favourite photo [because none survive of the party] had me bearded).
ReplyDeleteMy point?
It's worth the fear. It's worth the hesitation. If you're wavering, may I suggest you go ahead and try it anyway? The memory is worth the present.
JJ Here. I appreciate you taking the time to comment on this. Yes, you're right - go ahead and try it anyway!
ReplyDeleteMy first time out the door?
ReplyDeleteThere were many micro steps: wearing men's shorts with hose, wearing women's clothes that looked just like men's clothes, trying on clothes in the dressing room of a store while a clerk is helping, dressing up for Halloween and having nowhere to go, ...
My first BIG step out the door was when I went to work partially crossdressed on Halloween. I wore a men's button-up shirt with a tie up top, and I wore a skirt on the bottom with dark pantyhose and black heels on the bottom half.
I was a hit. Only 5-6 of us dressed in costumes. I was not dressed "too much", and I do not think anyone had any suspicions. I was around people who knew me and loved me, and I was dressed how I love to be dressed. It was such a nice day.
Later, I could have conversations with some of my female co-workers about clothing, etc. and they would include me and explain things because they assumed that I didn't know anything, but I had enough experience to be included in the conversation.
Years later, I went back and visited that office. One of the women's first statements to me was, "Have you worn any more pantyhose?" Several burst out laughing. The new person in the office, who did not know me, had a confused look.
Joey
I agree going out into the world can be both exhilarating and scary. My first outing were was a drive; then driving a little further; then getting out of the car to return library books to the night return slot or mail a letter or get one of those free newspapers. Each time the car was parked further and further away from my goal. Finally, I wanted to interact with fellow human, so I went all dolled up on Halloween into grocery or doughnut shops. I did not and still do not have the guts to meander en femme through the local malls just for the heck of it. I have taken long evening strolls in save neighborhoods. When my wife and I had "The Talk" decades ago she told me it was alright with her if I found a support group. I looked and none was to be found and it's still that way.
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