I admit that the first few times I used the ladies room, I was a little nervous about it, but I made sure to sit to pee and I never had a problem.
Unlike the men’s room where conversations between strangers is verboten, women do not have a problem engaging a stranger in conversation in the ladies’ room.
I don’t want to push my luck, so I have never started a conversation in the ladies’ room, but I lost count how many times complete strangers have started conversations with me. Typically, the conversation starts with a compliment about something I am wearing and does not go beyond a thank-you on my part. But a few times, I have encountered chatterboxes who want to talk about everything under the Sun and I have successfully held up my end of those conversations without a problem. No one has ever run out of the restroom screaming, “There’s a man in the ladies’s room!”
I think it helps that my presentation is good enough that worst case, a stranger would be very hesitant to call me on it. And although I don’t affect a female voice, my vocabulary and mannerisms are feminine, so that complete the picture.
As I wrote above, I always use the restroom that matches my presentation, but in these times, I wonder if that is safe.
My ham radio group holds a conference in the fall in different locations in the USA and Canada. This year, Knoxville, Tennessee was selected as the site of the conference. I had nothing to do with the selection and it is probably the last place I would have selected because Tennessee is rated as the worst state in the USA regarding trans and LGBTQ rights. Under Tennessee law, I could be arrested for using the ladies’ restroom to sit to pee!
Typically, our conferences are in hotels, so if I had to go, I could always run to my room and pee there and avoid any illegal encounters in a public ladies’ room. But this year, the conference is in a convention center, two blocks away from my hotel room. At my age, I would never make it to my hotel room in time without having an accident! So I was undecided about going.
My mind was made up for me because last week, my group cancelled the conference for logistical reasons. It’s a long story that I won’t get into here, but the decision to cancel had nothing to do with trans and LGBTQ rights.
That was a close call. It could have been a real life MAGA experience, but now I wonder if I will run into similar MAGA experiences attending other conferences in other states. For example, Hamvention in Ohio, which is not exactly a bastion of trans and LGBTQ rights. Maybe my perfect record in the ladies’ room is such that I have nothing to worry about, but with laws on the books specifically aimed at me, do I want to take a chance?
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| Wearing Kate Spade |
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| Louis Mandylor femulating on television’s Down the Shore. |
This is sarcasm, I think, but it might just work...
ReplyDeleteMaybe the trans community is going about this all wrong. Maybe they should just start going to as many men's restrooms as possible, doing their bathroom business, washing their hands, lingering, handing out hand towels, etc. Before long, the haters might be begging the lawmakers to "get these people out of the men's room".
As Stana says, "...and so it goes...",
Joey
I think you're on to something, Joey. Upon reading your comments I immediately visualized a few of those infamous photos of Femulators in full dress using the urinals in men's rooms. There would be no "lawbreakers", that is, until Tennessee passes their law preventing Femulators from using men's rooms. Maybe they'll call it the "Femulator No Public Peepee Poopoo Law" or some similar title. What will we do, wear catheters???
DeleteJust because I have nothing else to do in the early morning other than drink too much coffee and read blogs I "Googled" TN anti-LGBTQ+ laws. I've never seen such a twisted attempt to write discriminatory laws. It's mind boggling. TN must have no issues that need to be adjusted or corrected other than to rail against people for who they are.
ReplyDeleteCousin Chuck and our wives are out to dinner one night. The ladies when to the restroom. Cuz said he has to go too. He is the oldest of 4boys he returns. He tells us when he was young and living at home. He and his brothers were told to sit and pee! My wife couldn’t believe it. I said it made sense to me. With 5 guys in the house Auntie was tired of pissy floor and toilet seat. School and church and social events standing. Home sitting. And so it goes!
ReplyDeleteSitting to pee is much more sanitary unless there is a urinal. My mother always told us boys to sit at home and can let er fly when outside. I like Joeys thinking!...I might just try that...hike up my skirt and use the men’s urinal... 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteYes, there is the advantage of a skirt or dress when using a urinal. You don't have to fumble with a zipper. You just lift up the hem and let it fly!
DeleteJohn
John, you may not have to fumble with a zipper, but, if you're wearing pantyhose and a foundation garment it is heck to pee. No wonder it takes forever for my wife to finish her "business" when we're out for the evening. I agree with those who were taught to sit and pee so one does not miss the bowl. When stumbling into the bathroom in the dark of night it is way easier to just sit down. Another advantage is your wife will not yell at you for leaving the seat up. I learned that the hard way when I left the seat up and the next user during the night sat into the water. I got hell for that from my wife as she was the one that got up to dry our toddler daughter's butt. Forty years later it is still not funny.
Deleteeww...AI Girl is sitting on the hem of her dress on the seat.....
ReplyDeleteJoking apart, this is potentially a real problem. Being arrested would really spoil your day. Worse, if those laws are in place, there really is nothing to stop a trip to the courts. The problem is not so much which restroom you should use, but that someone is deliberately tring to hound you out of existence.
ReplyDeleteSo much for the land of the free.
Lets hope Kamala Harris can pull things together and nail Trump. I wait with bated breath to see if he in 'man' enough to take her on in a debate. I think she would destroy him. Not that any MAGA enthusiast would care.
Penny
the ladies room is really where the rubber meets the road. yes-women do engage other strange women in conversations in and out of the ladies room. so if you're enjoying your life en femme a part of being as a woman is to participate in this banter. feels good. however-always in the back of your mind is the concern that there will be a sudden awakening on the part of the other lady and then what? well the old saying in for a dime /in for a dollar applies as far as I'm concerned but I still tense up a bit internally.I would be very interested in the experience of others with this issue.-EMILY
ReplyDeleteThe AI girl is clearly sitting on a toilet, but to pee, absolutely not. To pee, knickers (panties) have to be down below the knee and if tights are worn, those too, knees a little aprt and sitting straight.
ReplyDeleteI guess for AI imges the detail is from the instructions given; the more detailed, the more realistic the image. My older female friend who give me advice and help ( and sometimes clothes) tell me that in the days of full skirts and stockings (with suspender belts) a quick pee was easy, but now tights add an inconvenience and slow the process down.
There was a lovely film, french or spanish, a few years ago where the actor playing a somewhat effeminate boy, plays also his mothe and there is a ovely short scene of her on the toilet; much more realistic than this image.
By the way peeing as a man, while dressed as a wome is a nightmare and impossible if a girdle is worn.
Another and more realistic image would be most agreeable.
Lily
In 2007, we moved into a new house. It was also a time when I was starting to explore my identity as a transgender woman and venturing out as myself. On that first day, in our new house while using the restroom, I instinctively decided to sit down. It wasn't a conscious choice, but it became an important action for me. It felt like embracing a part of myself. I know it might sound strange, but maybe my sisters here can relate. I still do
ReplyDeleteBack then, using the restroom as a woman wasn't a major concern. However, with the current laws and the rise of anti-transgender sentiment, I don't feel as comfortable anymore. Now, I'm very selective about where I use public restrooms Paula G
I was out for the first time as Julie with 2 girl friends. When "nature called", I hesitated - and Sarah grabbed me by the arm and waltzed us into the Ladies Room. I sat to do my business, we all chatted at the mirrors, and the other women in the room didn't even bat an eye. I've been marching into the Ladies Room on my own ever since. "If you act like you belong there, no one cares"
ReplyDeleteCome to Illinois ! It is developing protections for businesses which provide for a 3rd bathroom that is a single user thing and is unisex ... trans people can use that one if they are uncomfortable using either of the other 2 bathrooms; and Illinois is also beginning to protect the presentation of individuals, even allowing drivers ID to be issued on the basis of presentation of one sex or another.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to see so many posting about having a positive experience in the ladies room. May this continue into the future❣️
ReplyDeleteAll this bathroom talk has me thinking that this is yet another aspect where men have it easy: just unzip and do your business. Instead, as a CD, it's dress up, hose and panties down, fiddle with shapewear and untuck... then all again in reverse. Oh, the things we do to look pretty!
Try it on a jumpsuit !!
ReplyDeleteNever have I had a problem using the porcelain plumbing while wearing a jumpsuit. It is no more difficult than wearing a dress or skirt in the same locale and much easier than wearing a suit in the stall. It’s like wearing an adult onesie. Easy peesy.
DeleteAlways got my sleeve in the commode if it was long sleeve
ReplyDelete