As a closeted crossdresser from age 13 to 33, my voice was not important. The only crossdressed interactions I had with civilians was on Halloween. I was not trying to pass, although I often did (“who is the woman not in costume?”), so my male voice made no difference on the crossdressers’ national holiday.
Attending my first support group meeting, I noted that most girls used their male voice, so I fitted in, but the handful of girls who used a femme voice intrigued me. I wanted to be the best crossdresser I could be, so I began investigating how to feminize my voice.
I found Melanie Ann Phillips’ course “Melanie Speaks.” When I purchased the course, it was only available in VHS format, so I dubbed the audio to a cassette tape and played it every day on my commute to and from work.
At first, I was disappointed ― my voice still sounded the same and nothing like Melanie Ann Phillips’ perfect femme voice. But one day after about three weeks in, this fabulous femme voice came from my lips. I was shocked and could not believe that voice was coming from me!
However, I felt uncomfortable using my femme voice. Whereas all the other accoutrements of crossdressing, the dress, high heels, makeup, wig, handbag, were real to me, the voice felt fake and I was loathe to use it especially since my normal voice seldom gave me away.
For example, there was my first Halloween at work en femme when I ran my pantyhose. Femulating fanatic that I am, I drove to nearby CVS to buy a new pair. I entered the store and to avoid causing a commotion, I went to the first saleswoman I saw and explained that I ran the pantyhose of my Halloween costume and needed a new pair.
“Hosiery is in aisle eight, Ma’am,” she replied, unfazed by my Halloween costume hint.
I guess I was not going to cause a commotion, so I went to aisle eight, picked out a pair, then I went to the register where the same saleswoman rang me up without a clue.
The amazing thing is I never used my femme voice in CVS. I spoke in my normal male voice, which is admittedly soft-spoken, but definitely male. I guess the saleswoman’s eyes convinced her that I was a woman no matter what clues her ears might be picking up.
Moments like that convinced me to discard my femme voice, use my normal voice and damn the torpedoes.
(Click here to hear my voice on YouTube. I start speaking at the 6:39 mark.)
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| Wearing Boston Proper |
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| The different shades of Rachel |
It would really be difficult for me to sound like a genetic woman as in my church choir I sing second bass down to C2 (2 ledger lines below the bass staff). With my usual dresses I wear, hair below my shoulders, and a bust I look like a genetic woman. I get no strange looks with my attire, and interestingly enough I don't get any sort of reaction when I speak with my voice that's deep for a man.
ReplyDeleteJohn
Where there is a will, there may be a way. I have sung 2nd bass for 40+ years, but I was determined to develop a female voice and after 3 years of work, I acquired one, which I can slip in and out of. Further to Stana’s point, now 6 years in, I am finally used to hearing it! I can easily communicate over the phone and it is one less “tell” for me, so I am pleased. I rather thought that singing allowed me to move the sound to enable me to do this. But it could be genetics, for all I know! I do understand that my ability is rare for someone with such a deep male voice. Lisa
DeleteI guess I don't care enough to develop a feminine speaking voice. There are other things I need to do to enhance my presentation, such as exercise and losing weight. I don't think of myself as being a woman; rather I have chosen to expand my clothing and grooming options as a man, as you can guess with the use of my real, legal, masculine name.
DeleteWhen I hear myself sing from a recording of my voice such as with YouTube I hear a distinctly bass timbre rather than a baritone.
John
A good story. You were so lucky to be able to go to work dressed. It must have been so much fun!
ReplyDeleteMy employer recently acquired an AI chatbot, so I hopefully asked it what I should wear to work on Halloween. The result was a paragraph of depressingly credible drivel, followed by a dozen book recommendations. The first was 'Death By Powerpoint' and the third was 'How Powerpoint Makes Us Stupid'. So no help there then.
Penny from Cambridge, UK
I’ve watched your YouTube videos of you, speaking at the ham convention, and your voice sounds like a cisgender woman, your body language and movements also, or that of a cisgender woman Paula G
ReplyDeleteI use my regular voice too. Perhaps I talk a little softer when I'm a girl.
ReplyDeleteLoved the little Halloween story. The very first time I dressed up as a girl for Halloween I was 15. I was going to a costume party and my mother helped me get dressed up. I am sure that mom had no idea how much I was loving it. I guess I had that "Secretary" look wearing a dark skirt, blouse, and jacket.
I was about to leave for the party when mom admonished me, "Michael, you have a run in your pantyhose! Let me get you a fresh pair to put on."
I remember I blushed, but put on a new pair. I savored every moment of being a girl that night!
Emily
Oh. Emily, how I envy you. Had that happened to me, my perfectionist mother would have dressed me "to the nines". She probably would have made me a dress for the occasion. She was such a wizard at the sewing machine that she made all her own clothes. She was so adept that she didn't buy patterns, she made her own. Too bad she didn't find a job as a costumer on Broadway!
DeleteLike Emily, I use my regular voice. Attempts at Melanie's voice training flopped. But when I'm Mikki, I automatically speak softer and slower. and with some inflections that I know women use. But I get "ma'am-ed" regularly. I suspect a lot of it is simple curtesy, but people tend to react to what they see. If I've done a good job of presentation their first impression is "female" and that's what they acknowledge when they speak.
DeleteMaybe that's why nobody pays attention to my deep masculine voice when I talk as they see me looking and dressing like a genetic woman.
DeleteJohn
Stana has a rougher voice and is soft spoken but she is 100% convincible so the eyes over ride the ears. Killer legs and a wonderful fashion sense also allow her to present as who she is as a natural woman. Stana is not just confident but is natural so she isnt acting but just being herself. Maria De Filippi Is an italian tv star and her voice is very rough but she is a woman and tall too...just like Stana. I have never her anyone mention if she is trans or anything. A dress, high heels and proper make up is all thats needed. Stana also has great skin. Hugs Brenda
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