Diana, Lee Anne, Sylvia and me (the ladies who do lunch) met at Viron Rondo Osteria in Cheshire, Connecticut, on Wednesday to have an early afternoon meal.
Osteria was jumping. Their large parking lot was almost full, so I am glad I made reservations the day before. We were seated in the main dining room and no one seemed to notice the senior ladies. None of our fellow diners seemed to pay any attention to us. No one stared, pointed or laughed.
I wore an animal print ruched dress from Venus that I have not worn out before. I also wore a new wig (Sandie from Noriko in “Sandalwood”) and new heels (Nine West Sorts 3.35-inch heels in “Barely Nude”). It was chilly, so I topped my outfit with my JustFab double breasted plaid coat and accessorized with gold jewelry (necklace, earrings, bracelet) and a beige Christian Siriano Dress Barn bag. I also wore Berkshire thigh-highs in a new (to me) shade that I like – “City Beige.”
I also wore glasses. I had a feminine-style bifocals that I ordered from Zenni a year ago, but I had put them away a couple of months ago and I don’t remember where (one of those senior traits), so I wore a different feminine-style that were not bifocals. This became an issue when trying to read the menu. Lee Anne kindly let me borrow her bifocals to get over that hump.
One more accessory – I took my cane along for insurance while walking in heels on unforgiving pavement and sidewalks. The cane was strictly insurance as I had no problem walking in heels on Wednesday.
The only other time that I use the cane is during my daily walk in the woods. The paths through the woods are very natural – lots of ups and downs and hidden (by leaves) holes and broken branches, so the cane is again insurance in case I trip up or have to fend off a bear. (In all my years hiking those same woods, I only encountered a bear once – about a month ago. The bear got out of Dodge as soon as he saw me coming.)
Our lunches were excellent. The ladies seemed to like the new lunch venue that I had suggested and we will probably continue dining there in the future. (Probably some time before Christmas.)
For what it’s worth, I don’t think we passed. It is the same old problem – a girl going solo can pass if she is presentable. But it is difficult for a quartet of girls, all six-footers or thereabouts, to pass. And I know for sure we did not pass because when we paid the check, the waitress said, “Thank-you, sir.”
UPDATE: Contrast this with a girl who dined solo at the same restaurant on Halloween 2022.
And so it goes.
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| Wearing Ann Taylor |
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| Yet another beautiful femulator |
How very rude of the waitress. Even if you “don’t pass” she should have received basic training to refer to the patrons using pronouns of the gender you are clearly presenting in, or at least use neutral ones.
ReplyDeleteDisappointing that the waitress did not do you the courtesy of addressing you as you obviously wished to be addressed.
ReplyDeleteI have heard people, even women, address obviously genetic women as "Sir" plenty of times so I say it's no big deal.
DeleteJohn
Well , it's High Time to hang up the high heels and just be a Respectable Old Guy because old guys don't pass as women , why humiliate yourselves ?
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion your advice is uncalled for. However if a man presents as a woman, and he is "Sir"ed he shouldn't make a mountain out of a mole hill.
DeleteJohn
Your lunch outing sounded wonderful, and your photo captured the lovely atmosphere perfectly. You radiated femininity in the picture. It’s disheartening to hear about the misgendering incident – intentional or not, it was hateful and disgusting . Your resilience shines through, and your friends should have seen you flawlessly, whether in a group or on your own.
ReplyDeletePaula G
The 'sir' comment is just rude and unkind, IMO. It doesn't cost anything to be polite.
ReplyDeleteEven though I present as a woman I personally prefer to be addressed as "Sir" but if I'm addressed as "Ma'am" it doesn't bother me. Most of the time I wear dresses, have beyond shoulder length hair, and a bust (bra cup size DD).
DeleteSo not everybody who looks like a woman wishes to be addressed exclusively as "Ma'am".
John
anything said about the high heels guy would merit censorship. wonder what jollies he gets by reading your stuff-emliy
ReplyDeleteThat is one of my fave dresses Stana. Going to have to root around and find mine this weekend. You look super-happy and just all-in wonderful. Thanks for the inspiration! (Venus never disappoints). XX
ReplyDeleteAll dressed up and nobody noticed? I would have been disappointed!
ReplyDeleteI used to spend a lot of time presenting as a woman when I was in the UK typically I would spend a whole weekend became very at ease out in public. The only time I would get miss gendered and called , sir, was when I use my credit card quite often when handing it back to me, they would say thank you, sir. I believe this is because they read the name on the card. Paula G
ReplyDelete