There ― I admitted it. I got it off my chest and now I don't have to worry about people accusing me of being an "overdresser" because I have come out to the world about it.
It is hard to overdress when you attend a trans support group meeting; many of the attendees overdress because the meeting may be their only opportunity to dress at all, so they dress to kill.
That being said, when I attended trans support group meetings, I was usually the most overdressed girl at the meeting. Hands down. No question about it.
I carried on my overdressing when I began going out in public en femme. The woman in a cocktail dress and high heels shopping at Wal*Mart ― that was me. The woman in the sequin evening gown seated in the centerfield bleachers at Fenway Park ― that was me. The woman in the little black dress and pearls dining at Taco Bell ― you guessed it ― that was me, too.
At first, I worried about it because overdressing drew attention to me and by drawing attention to me, civilians might scrutinize me too closely and figure out that I was packing something extra underneath my periwinkle bridesmaid gown.
I sure did not want to out myself, so I began toning it down. But I soon found out that toned-down dressing was Boring with a capital B!
Blending in with all the other babes at Home Depot was just not my thing. I wanted to be outstanding in my field in heels, not flats.
So, I began overdressing again and I have never looked back because in the words of blogger Kate Fridkis, "Being overdressed is fun. You have to pull it off with confidence. You have to walk with your shoulders back, like you planned it. Like you're dressed up because you live a dramatic, impressive life. I mean, why not? Maybe you do."
Ms. Fridkis' "The Art of Overdressing" on The Huffington Post inspired this post and I urge you to go read it yourself; maybe it will inspire you to buy a red strapless dress to wear to the grocery store.
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| Wearing JustFab (Source: JustFab) |
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| Austrian actors Oscar Sabo and Josefine Dora switched genders 100 years ago |
If you read your own notes that have resided in the right hand column of your blog you will recognize how consistent your approach to dressing has been over the years. "If in doubt, overdress".
ReplyDeleteThat's my story and I'm sticking with it!
DeleteGuess I too am guilty as charged! While I probably am not the one in Wal*Mart in the cocktail dress and high heels, I am frequently feel over dressed for what you normally will find there. It just feels so wonderful to be in a nice skirt or dress. Here in Florida it seems to me that the casual in casual dress is just soooo much more casual so much more of the time.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I was buoyed somewhat today when I stopped by the wine store and found out that I was wasn't the only one in the store in a skirt and heels!! There was another lady in line dressed as I was... maybe even a bit nicer!
Lee
"Casual" around here often equates to being a slob.
DeleteYou may pass BETTER overdressed, Stana - because you are more comfortable and confident that way. Attitude helps!
ReplyDeleteYou may have something there, Fiona.
DeleteIt's interesting to compare your US perspective with that of someone living in Paris. I was in the supermarket this morning, and every woman there was wearing a dress or skirt, and high heels. From 3 inch to 5 inch. No wedges, no platforms, regular 'escarpins'.
ReplyDeleteI doubt that you would be viewed an overdresser here, although you would have to augment your scarf collection, and wear longer skirts. :-)
Maybe someday!
DeleteHave to agree with Anonymous. Here in Merida, MX, around half the women are normally in dresses or skirts and are well presented. The half in jeans and pants (or shorts) still are often in heeled shoes or certainly other attractive footwear. Poorly dressed women is an American phenomenon as a recent trip to Indiana proved where sloppy and unkempt was the norm. American women have lost pride in their looks so as even a reasonably dressed trans women in a dress, a skirt or even nicely pressed slacks or jeans with jewelry and makeup, you are sure to stand out and thats considered overdressed.
ReplyDeleteTo wear cocktail attire is knocking it out of the park. That sheath dress you wear in the right sidebar would be normal here in Merida...well maybe a little better than average as they like shift dresses that reach to just above the knee.
Coincidentally, my daughter is on her way to Cancun as I type this.
DeleteYes I agree that women have lost the reasoning as to why they should dress up a little. As a full blooded male I hate it. And my wife is one. And no amount of talking to her will change her thinking as her mother was and her sister is the same way.
ReplyDeleteWell-dressed women used to inspire me, but now they are so rare that I have to rely on well-dressed transwomen to inspire me.
DeleteWhen I officially transitioned, I had to go out and buy tons of casual women's clothes. My closet was full of cocktail dresses, but I needed jeans, t-shirts, yoga pants, etc.
ReplyDeleteI actually indulged in some jeans and leggings and flats for those times when I must tone it down.
DeleteI laughed at the Fenway Park reference. I grew up and lived most of my life near SF. I sometimes attended night games at Candlestick wearing dresses and heels in near Arctic conditions.
ReplyDelete