Dear Stana,
I absolutely love your blog and visit it several times a week. I really appreciate the time you put into making your page worth a look and keeping it updated. Those comics are hysterical!
Now I must ask, as much as you are out and about and somewhat "open" at work, would you share your opinion on guys with long nails?
I do wear my nails long, and they have been getting longer as I've been getting braver. Today, in a meeting with two females, the more masculine one called me on it. She said "you need to clip your nails, why are they so long?"
I told her they were to claw her eyes out. The other girl remarked she must really know me well to make that kind of comment.
My employer prides itself on embracing diversity and I have little care for what "the company" would say, but it's individuals like this that make me stop and think about what I am doing. I feel sure more people have noticed, but have respectfully withheld comment.
I do love having long nails to polish on the weekend when I have more time to femulate. Do you have any thoughts?
Keep up the great work!
Robyn
Hi Robyn,
Thank you for the kind words!
I wear false pre-glued stick-on nails (Kiss brand) mainly because I never got the hang of polishing my own nails under the gun. However, for six or eight months a few years ago, I did grow my own nails out to a feminine length.
I never worried about what my co-workers thought about my nails. If one asked about my nails, I would point-blankly respond that my nails are long because I dress as a woman on weekends.
Either they thought I was joking and laughed at my response or they didn't know what to think. In either case, I never was asked twice by the same person.
As long as you keep your nails neat and clean, no one should have any complaints about them. I am a little surprised that your co-worker said that about your nails. She had a lot of nerve!
I say, you go, girl and wear your long nails and the public be darned!
Best Wishes,
Stana
Need advice concerning femulation or other crossdressing-related matters, then e-mail me and I will happily give you my opinion on the matter. My e-mail address is stana-stana at sbcglobal.net.
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| Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe) |
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| Tony Randall femulates Medusa in the 1964 film 7 Faces of Dr. Lao |
Long nails in male boy mode can be a give away if you are "not out"
ReplyDeleteI used to work in an office where one man was suspected of being one of us simply because even though his nails were short they looked too good
I love the Kiss brand too, they are so easy to apply and stay on very well. I hate taking them off the next day because they look and feel so good. Last week, on a business trip, I came out about my femulation to a co-worker by wearing my nails the next morning to breakfast (I had gone out the night before). They were very natural in color and she did not notice until I held up my cup of coffee, with my hands wrapped around the cup, looked at her and said, "I have something to share with you". Her mouth gaped open and her eyes grew wide as she pointed at my fingernails, and then we had a really fun discussion. It felt good to share this with her and I never worried about her reaction as I knew it would go well. In the end she thanked me for trusting her and sharing this "mostly" hidden part of me with her.
ReplyDeleteRobyn,
ReplyDeleteI think that Stana's comments on your inquiry were on target. If you would like to check out a blog of a senior girl who keeps her nails shaped and polished I would refer you to "From Me to Mandy" at www.mandysherman.blogspot.com. She often discusses her nail treatment and her approach to being somewhat androgeneous in her presentation.
Pat
Having had my nails long and painted for several years, even though a combination of issues means that I haven't dressed in almost 2 years, I've found that most people don't even take any notice any more.
ReplyDeleteThen again, my male facebook profile has a femme photo, so it's not as if people don't know. ;-)
That was really an uncalled for comment about cutting your nails! I would answer such a comment by saying that I like long nails and would LOVE to get my nails done professionally but really can't due to the social stigma attached. Be advised though that females DO (for the most part) notice such things as per the first "anonymous" comment. You're fooling yourself if you think that they do not.
ReplyDeleteHow the staff reacts is a product of your relationship with them and perhaps also how long you have been a fixture at the office. I usually wear my nails from 1/4" to 3/8" in length (until I break one...) and I shape and buff them. I have only had one comment and it was an oblique one - not hurtful in any way. I feel that your relationship with every individual at the office is truly what alters their thinking patterns and their comments. The "you need to clip your nails" comment was over the line but I wouldn't write her off as a result - she may be an interesting individual who says what they think and I value people like that too. :-)
Hugs,
Tanit
Can't resist putting "my two cents worth" in...
ReplyDeleteBefore I retired a number of years ago (about 6?) my wardrobe was almost exclusively from the women's side of the aisle - slacks, a company polo or generic top, and feminine flats. My nails were generally acrylics with a french manicure, and since none of my slacks had pockets, a purse was my constant companion.
My attire (and my nails) evolved over time. When retirement approached, I was enjoying (yes really) being a part of a couple of the at-break female cliques. My nails were under constant scrutiny by the girls, and several of them encouraged me to switch from french nails to wearing red acrylics. "Red is universal...you'd look so pretty in all your outfits with long red nails!"
Many of my co-workers knew my wife from some social events, so that was not an issue. And they knew that was the factor preventing my wearing red nails. While everyone probably figured that I dressed as a woman on the side, it didn't matter.
Unfortunately, acceptance (or not) is where you find it...
Hugs,
Mandy
I have been wearing polish to work since I turned 50. My nails have been long and short. I used to get questions,but now no one says anything except when they love the color or nail art. I used to make excuses but I have learned that being honest and telling people I like polish and it brightens my day shuts them up. I have now grown my hair out. In most cases once they realize you are the same person on the liked before, they get over it and it becomes a non issue. Love your blog!
ReplyDeleteI love long girly nails. I have a dozen bottles of nail polish, all shades of red from very red to really red. If I was a girl I would wear nail polish all the time, 24/7. I am younger than Stana, but not too much. I still dress up sporadically in private but I could never pass as a women even though I have several feminine assets. I am slim and trim with narrow shoulders and I fit snugly into an A-cup bra! Ha! But my most feminine asset is my thin small hands with deep set nails that grow like weeds and look absolutely luscious when I "do them." I now have a long nails season which starts in December when I let my nails start to grow. I periodically shape them with a file but otherwise I don't cut them until March. And are they long by then! In the winter I am inside more anyway and I can wear gloves outside if I feel the need.
ReplyDeleteI understand perfectly the long nails anxiety syndrome. For me though it is only with people who expect me to have a masculine identity. I have learned to keep myself down and out of sight if I am sitting at a table or in close social situations and so far no one has told me to cut my nails or made a compliment either. When I buy nail polish I make sure it is a women clerk but here I make no attempt to hide my long, long nails. I get occasional reactions. I have been teased, which I actually enjoyed. One women said "I hope this is for your wife?" But I said "Well we do our nails together." It was March at the time. Personally I think it would be fun for all of us to exchange pics of our manicures and pedicures. Here is an email for me. I am actually marc at marcn185@Yahoo.com