My family is well aware of that fact. So whenever Jesus' or my birthday approaches, they ask what I would like rather than take a chance and give me something I may not like. (By the way, my family is fussy, too, so I always ask them what they want.)
My birthday is in March, so I expect that my family will be posing the biannual gift question in February.
I'd like to tell them that I have lived the first 65 years of my life as a man (more or less) and would like to live the next 65 years of my life as a woman.
Maybe that is too much to ask. After all they are accustomed to Stan the man and may be unwilling to make the transition to Stana the woman.
In my heart, I know that is a lot to ask. So I am willing to step back and ask them to gift me a compromise: tolerate me presenting as a woman at work and in other professional scenarios and they can have Stan the man the rest of the time.
Making the transition on my birthday seems apropos, so that gives me some time to work it all out.
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| Miss Todd (1981) |
Great Idea. I wish that gift for you.
ReplyDeleteSusan
It sounds as though that would be a fabulous birthday present.
ReplyDeleteInvolving your family is an excellent idea, get them involved, and let them set their boundaries, but after all, at the end of the day it is your life. If this is truly what you need to do then I trust they will understand.
Glad you are taking the steps to be the person you want to be. Maybe in time you will be able to present as a woman all the time.
ReplyDeleteI´m taking a more gradual approach. Right now I wear women´s blouses a lot of the time, and thanks to HRT I have developed breasts approaching DD. I have long hair and I wear lipstick and eye makeup for business and church. I still go by the name of John and I speak in my masculine bass voice. So I need to be able to talk in a feminine voice to truly present as a woman.
Johanna
Maybe we can take up a collection... :)
ReplyDeleteIf I ever make a move like that, instead of my birthday, I'd choose April 1.
Thanks for sharing this. This is such a sad commentary on the lives of trans people. And it is universal. None of the cis-family members would ask for permission to be who they are or how they should dress at work- at least not from other family members. And yet here we are, acting as being trans is such a huge crime and we actually need their "permission" to be who we really are. Instead of waiting to get a "gift" from them and hoping that they decide to give it to you (what if they don't), it may just be better that you inform them of your decision to dress as you please at work. Letting out your true self and leading a less stressful life should be your gift to them. They might also be waiting for you to decide. They are unsure because you are unsure so just take that step and be the person who you truly are! Carpe diem.....
ReplyDeletei hope you get that special present as a gift, then. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd btw, that white diamond dress is to die for!!
sara elise