Eight years ago today, I launched Femulate with the following short post:
Welcome to my new blog!
I am a male, who occasionally goes out in the world emulating a female. This blog documents my adventures en femme.
Back then I was in denial about who I really was and referred to myself as a “plain vanilla crossdresser.” Being a crossdresser was “safe.” I could avoid facing the truth and complicating my life.
Things changed.
Writing this blog on a daily basis changed me. I grew with the blog and faced ― or rather accepted and embraced the truth that I was a woman.
I was not a woman trapped in a man's body; I was a woman dealing with society’s expectations of what a human being with my body parts was supposed to be.
Society viewed me as a feminine guy and likely gay, but I knew that I was neither. I was a woman plain and simple and I was determined to live my life as the best woman I could be despite the circumstances I found myself in and despite society's desire to straight jacket me. It has not been easy, but some people have it harder than I, so I feel blessed in many ways.
Whether you consider yourself a crossdresser, a transvestite, a transgender, a transsexual, or a whatever, I really believe we are all women.
And I hope this blog has helped you come to that realization and begin living your life as the women you are.
Wearing 4.Collection.
Close cover before striking!
We are all women. That's it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for saying these things so clearly.
Great post, Stana!
Feli
Stana, Thank you for your years of helpful comments. I too had decades as a plain vanilla before I admitted the truth to my self. All the best with the rest of your journey.
ReplyDeleteStana I believe we are all people first and how you dress and present is less important than what is in your heart and mind. If you are a good human being that is what counts. Society's expectations of what a male and female should be are just that: expectations.
ReplyDeleteWe need to be who we are inside and feel good about ourselves and that is what counts most.
Your blog has been an inspiration for those of us who have doubted that we could get out there and be ourselves. I hope that you keep posting and showing us that you can balance life's commitments while following your inclinations even if they rub against the grain of those who do not understand or accept us.
Best,
Joanna Santos
Happy Anniversary and many thanks. I suspect you've not only changed with your blog but your blog has changed many of your readers. Many thanks for the work and the words.
ReplyDeleteCrossdressers are not women, nor do they want to be. Christopher Morley has been asked if he would prefer to actually be a woman and he emphatically says no.
ReplyDeleteIf your DNA has a Y chromosome, you are not a woman.
"If your DNA has a Y chromosome, you are not a woman"
DeleteTell that to Jamie Lee Curtis, Julia Child and the thousands of XY women out there!
Stana
DeleteCongratulations on your journey. I thank you for all of the hard work you have put in to make femulate a success. Thousands of us start our day by checking in with femulate.
You are mentor for women everywhere and an asset to our community
Bless you
Paula
Happy aniversary. I have never had any doubt that you, and the other speicial ladies I interact with, are 100% female. What I find so appealing about then is just how well they manage to assert their femininity in the face of an uncooperative nature. That's what makes their femininity so uniquely precious and admirable- at least to me!
ReplyDeleteStana:
ReplyDeleteYou inspire us all.
Thank you for eight great years.
Carry on . . . . . . . please!
Kindest regards,
Rhonda
Bravo!!!!!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on 8 wonderful years and let me wish you many, many more. Your blog is the first one that I go to when I boot up and I suspect that it serves as the gateway portal to many others.
ReplyDeleteLabels are tough things. No one label seems to fit any of us all of the time. The labels that we in the community use are misnomers along the same lines as the concept of "one size fits all pantyhose". They may serve a technical purpose but a pair of pantyhose that will fit me would swim on a 5', 120 lb body and pantyhose that would work for that 5', 120 body would never make it past my knees.
Pat
Dear Stana,
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the FEMULATE anniversary! Thank You for giving we, your readers, this lovely gift.
Love,
Sheila.
I love your blog Stana!
ReplyDeleteWhat you share here inspires hope for all of us that started our journey in life cast in the wrong gender.
Thank you so much! SO VERY MUCH!
A BIG thank you (((HUG))) to you!
Jen
All you need to do to be a woman, in Stana's book, is to dress like one.
ReplyDeleteOf course, the best anyone born male can be is a femulating woman, a female emulator who is granted the title of woman by Stana,
So Femulate away and get the access to woman space and woman label for free!
In my experience, anyone who doesn't acknowledge the difference between men and women, even men in dresses, is a man. The cultural differences and obligations, the choices that must be made by women are so different that men feeling entitled to use the label while retaining manhood (if only for the good of the family) just don't get it.
Congratulations on eight years of crossdressing blogging! Congratulations on understanding that transgender expression isn't just about emulating females!
But on the topics of language, entitlement and cultural understanding, you still have a way to go.
Yawn!
DeleteLike many others, I have also found your blog to be inspirational, ever since I first discovered it, which was probably around 2010. Congratulations on the blog's birthday and long may you continue to have the energy to produce it!
ReplyDeleteStana,
ReplyDeleteIts good that you have posted dissenting comments here because everyone has their own point of view. Gender politics are a very powerful thing and indeed those who have transitioned have experienced them first hand. It is indeed not an easy thing to be a woman in society and the bias and discrimination are still very much a part of their everyday reality.
I have no issue with people who transition and tip my hat to them. I do however have an issue with those who would discredit or ridicule people who are gender variant in their own way. We all have a right to be who we are and if dressing is what works for you and you want to label yourself a woman while you do it then that's your business.
So much of what we experience during our lifetime is based to discrimination, anger, and resentment instead of live and let live. Just be the best person you can be because that's what counts.
So call yourself a male-femme, a crossdresser, a tranny, a gender variant....call yourself what you will. Just continue being Stana!
Joanna
I'll second that!!
DeleteHow does the old saying go: "There are two types of people. Those who put people into categories and those who do not."
:-)
N.
I'm a bit with Unknown here. I have my OEM equipment, and I'm under no illusions that I could even see the world from the perspective of a woman. I have experienced things and gained insights that normal males never will, because I'm a "stunt double" for a woman in many public interactions, but that still doesn't change what I am.
ReplyDeleteHowever... I do strive for a cultured, polite feminine identity... a *lady*, in the traditional sense, if you will. That's just a coin flip from the gentleman I was raised to be. Not all men are gentlemen; not all women are ladies. So I think there's room for a few more ladies and gentlemen of any sex.
Lastly, I reject the notion that one has only a binary choice in the matter; e.g. that if one does not identify with man, he must be woman. I feel there's room in between, with the American Indian concept of "two-spirit" being one example.
Congrats, Stana! I know it can be hard to be a woman with all of society and I just want to say thanks a bunch! You do us all a good service. Keep on keepin' on!
ReplyDelete