“First, I am approaching age 70, and have been going out since I was 12, and I have the pictures to prove it. I was around back when Virginia Prince started her sororities called Tri-Ess. Lets say... 1963, which gives me some insight to the progression of our community. The suggestion that we throw away the cameras is short sighted, demeaning, and without the slightest bit of merit. I myself use a camera to help me better my presentation.
“I have the pleasure to say that I was the very first director of the first Be-All convention, and after that I was involved in 9 more in some capacity. Which means that I have seen all levels of competence of how we present ourselves as females. Some of us are quite lovely, some not, but the drive to present ourselves as females is exactly the same for all of us.
“I will also add that not once have I seen a sister be asked to leave a meeting, a convention, or an event for lack of talent in her presentation. Every single group that I know of accepts us all, regardless. Is help offered, yes. Is it done with a kind word, yes. But they are us, and we are them, and if nothing else, the transgender community accepts everyone like us, offering friendship and a smile.
“Dr. King and my mother gave me the same message. Rely on the content of their character. Do not rely on the length of their hair, what their dress choice is, or how big they are. I have found that within our community, which is really quite small, less than 5% of the population, every single major event, from the Be-All, Southern Comfort, and Fantasia Fair, all of them accept everyone. They do not ask for a picture ahead of time to see if you fit in. Just being there makes you part of the larger whole.”
***
In response to the Comments to Wednesday’s Lemonade post, the writer of the original e-mail that precipitated this (Paula C) wrote, “I wish that I had been able to understand what your correspondent ‘Unknown’ was on about and how to reply to his comment directly but the system beats me. We have a word – a phrase - in English ‘Gobbledy – gook’ which is a kind way of describing rubbish. I have no bile (that’s one of the few words I understood) in me and it is a breath-taking arrogance to presume that there might be! Just because I dared criticise.
“If nothing else; please try and explain why firstly so many TV’s take photographs of themselves in such extraordinary quantities and then, to me, incomprehensibly, want to display them to the World and his Wife. It is deviant behaviour and plays no part in real life if one is a woman. I feel SO sorry for those who so far have submitted their photos which they are proud of. What do they really see when they look at themselves, I have to ask?
“For a number of years I held quite a senior voluntary position here in the UK within the Beaumont Society and also spent quite a lot of my time TRYING to explain ‘transvestism’ to Wives who sought help. (I founded the WOBS, the group trying to help the Wives of transvestites). I also talked to Samaritans groups throughout the south of England, so I do know what I am talking about. I also remember well Virginia Prince in the ‘Sixties’ coming to the UK with missionary-like zeal to teach us poor backward English how to deal with and revel in our transvestism. Not a person I took to. A veritable cross-dressing Billy Graham.”
Wearing DressBarn.
Femulating at the Porchester Hall drag ball in London, circa 1985.
Paula C told us their history trumped all challenges and tossed my comment off as "gobbledygook," acknowledging their inability to understand it, but people like you took the biggest hit from them.
ReplyDeleteI admire your posting a comment that calls people like you "deviant" and pathetic for needing to take so many pictures of themselves.
You handled that fierce slap with grace.
Stana
ReplyDeleteAmong the many good things that you do and the many positive aspects to your blog is that it can and often does serve as a place for folks to express their views. We can read them and comment on them whether we agree or disagree with their positions.
Pat
I asked myself the same question about pictures. My first thought was, there's a narcissistic side to what we do. My ex convinced me I was entirely wrong (although not the way she thought).
ReplyDeleteI think most people want pictures when they look their best, or when they're going out to a special event. Every time Meg steps out the door, she looks better than I ever did and it's definitely a special event.
I think it's just that simple.
Regarding taking selfies, in fact we sisters are no better and no worse than vast numbers of people of all types - "civilians", as Stana has dubbed them - who are forever taking photos of themselves for self-satisfaction. I don't have to look any further than my own offspring to see that this is simply part of the fabric of modern life. Even Queen Elizabeth has photobombed selfies (at the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow, 2014), for heaven's sake.
ReplyDelete