Guys shake hands to signify affection between them. But lately, some guys also hug to signify affection. In my case, I was raised to shake hands --- hugging was not an option.
When I began socializing as a tranny, I discovered that trannies seldom shake hands.
Just as gals have more options when it comes to fashion, gals have more options when it comes to affection and trannies follow their lead. Gals shake hands, hug, air kiss, or kiss kiss to show affection and so do trannies.
En femme, I have been hugged, air-kissed, kiss-kissed and even French-kissed by one particular tranny who wanted her way with me. The French kiss was a little disconcerting, but I quickly got used to the other signs of affection and usually hug and occasionally air kiss when greeting gals and trannies. With guys is something different.
When I came out to my ham radio group, I did so by e-mail because the group was scattered across the globe. However, the group met face-to-face twice a year and my coming out email was sent a few weeks before one of our face-to-face meetings so as to prepare the group for my debut en femme.
When we show up at the face-to-face meetings, we greet each other (long time, no see!). Some shake hands, some do not. I was always a hand-shaker en homme, but not so much en femme.
When I showed up for that first face-to-face en femme, I was early and only one guy was present. I went up to him and without thinking about it, I gave him a hug as was my wont en femme when greeting people.
As I unhugged, he remarked, "So this is the way it's going to be."
Now he was a big supporter when I came out and has continued to be, but I did not know how to take his remark.
I'm probably reading more into it than there is in it (I always do), but after that remark, I abandoned hugging and shook hands when greeting guys who knew me as a guy before they knew me as a girl.
There are exceptions, but that is another story.
By the way, I know that the “boys” in the image at the top of the page are not really boys. Rather, they are female models who look boyish enough, at least for the purposes of the message.
Femulator street style, circa 1925.
Wearing Bebe.
The Church I have found myself part of is very informal, whereas I was brought up to be very formal, so teh first time I was hugged by a 6ft 2 18 stone hairy bloke was very disconcerting! I hasten to stress I was in drab at the time. being hugged by a large hairy man en femme woudl bring on a whole different set of emotions.
ReplyDeleteIndeed it would!
Delete"When in Rome, do as the Romans do."
ReplyDelete"When in drag, do as the dragons do."
And I guess when en femme, do as the femmes do.
DeleteI always shook hands in most of my greetings when I grew up as a boy. Today, I let the greetings go the way HE wants and I'm usually hugged! I do not respond no matter what, unless the circumstance is different and he expects me to.
ReplyDeleteGood strategy, Billie. I should use it, too.
DeleteEven as a guy, I usually don't hug women unless I really know them well. Hugging feels very intimate to me, but if a women were to hug me I'm all for it. I guess I'm just very reserved, that or I've had some really bad experiences with women judging me making me feel like I'm undeserving of a hug.
ReplyDeleteI am very huggy as a girl... not so much as a guy.
DeleteI was part of a community (Christian ministry based organization) where EVERYONE hugged EVERYONE. And now, 15 years later, I still have a desire to give a hug to those I care about and for - male, female or whatever.
ReplyDeleteThe "so this is how it's going to be" comment hit how with me. As men we are often reserved, because that how we think it's supposed to be, I have to tell you the more I experience men, the more I can see they really don't want to be reserved but feel they have to be to keep up appearances. Most of the guys who have experienced my coming out and are real guys with open hearts and minds follow suit impeccably well!
ReplyDeletewhere is that photo from?
ReplyDeletewww.miumiu.com was the source. The photo was from their 2012 resort collection.
DeleteI wouldn't take it too hard. It sounds to me like it was meant in the sense of acknowledging a new tradition, not making a negative value judgement. Stay strong and beautiful!
ReplyDeleteYou are probably correct, Sandra. Like I said, he has been one of my biggest supporters.
Delete